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Warning: This chapter contains graphic content that may not be suitable for readers 17 and below. Hell, this whole book isn't for 17 and below. So to whoever it may concern, read at your own risk.

[J A X ' S P O V ]

Blaire has been avoiding me for three days now. Three whole days. I hate that there's tension crackling in the air and although I should have grown used to it by now, I still feel very uneasy.

Ever since the kiss, things between us have changed. And it's not in the good way.

Every time I try to talk to her, it always ends up like this:

"Hey," I say.

"Go away," she mutters and walks away from me.

You see how difficult it is to talk to her? I've never been more aggravated trying to talk to a human being before.

And since our conversations usually consists of that, I can't even talk about the kiss with her. She has been avoiding me like I'm the damn plague and I'm getting sick of it.

I know where she goes when she's not in the mansion—to the shooting range to blow off some steam. I know this because I followed her that one time and saw her there. And before you write me off as a creep or stalker, I would like to defend myself by saying that I only did it because I was worried for her. That and also the fact that I didn't want her going to Ben again. Blaire and I may not be talking right now but I still have deep feelings for her. And I'm not going to let Ben screw it up again.

So I'm thankful that she does not pursue him and vice-versa. I'm quite relieved that she's been spending more time at the shooting range. At least I know where she's holed up at majority of the time. I do wonder why she spends so much time there though. Maybe she's trying to erase the memories of our kiss.

I clench my fists by my sides. I hate not talking about the kiss. And I hate that it has already damaged our friendship.

Hell, she can't even look at me straight in the eye anymore when I try to talk to her. It physically pains me to see her like this.

Scared. Frightened. Absolutely terrified.

It's like she doesn't know how to handle what happened so she just ignores it in hopes that it would just go away. But I'm not going to let that happen.

     I'm never going to forget that kiss.

I need to know what she's thinking. I need to know what's on her goddamned mind so that I'll know what went wrong.

And when I figure that out, I can fix this. Blaire and I.

But it seems that I'm the only one that's willing to do just that. And that frustrates the living shit out of me.

Even Hunter knows that something is up between us that is not quite right. This morning, when I was getting ready for another one of my photoshoots, I told Blaire that I didn't need her standing by me all the time, and in response to that, she stormed off.

   Now, Hunter walks over to me, eyeing the both of us warily as he approaches my chair.

    "Okay, cut the shit. What is going on with the both of you?" He hisses. "You've been at each other's throats since I picked you guys up on Monday. Did something happen between the both of you?"

    "No," I say in a sharp tone.

    "Don't lie to me, boy." He presses an accusing finger on my chest. "I need to know if this is going to affect your relationship with her. She's your bodyguard, for god's sake. Your dad chose her because she tolerates you. And now you fucked it up. If you did something—something that caused her to act this way-"

    "I didn't do anything," I hiss back.

    "Then what happened?"

    I sigh. Hunter's not going to stop until he gets some answers so I have no choice but to give it to him. "Look, Blaire kissed me, alright?"

    Hunter's eyes widen, then he steps back as if the impact of what I said had hit him so hard. "Seriously?"

    "Seriously." I nod. "I don't know what happened, man. We were having a good time during the weekend. We were talking and I told her that she was scared about the prospect of me being with her and I don't know. She just grabbed me and kissed the fuck out of me."

    Hunter laughs. "Okay, so you didn't like it?"

    "Like it?" I scoff. "I fucking love it. I can't even comprehend the kiss because it's just so mind blowing. But then, before I can take things further, she stopped kissing me and just left me."

    "Ah. She left you with blue balls. That's why you're upset."

    "I'm not upset because of that-" I sigh. "Okay, I may have been upset about that, but I'm even more upset about the fact that she refuses to talk to me about it."

  "So you want to talk about your feelings, eh?" Hunter leans against the edge of the chair, crossing his arms and smirking. I roll my eyes.

    "I sound ridiculous when you put it that way."

    "Hey, I'm not judging you." He shrugs. "I think it's great that you want to talk to her. At least you care about what happened between the both of you."

    "Yeah, well, it's a first. I usually don't care about these sort of things."

    "Wow," Hunter whistles. "She's changing you, bro."

    "No, she's not."

    "You're so fucking whipped."

    "No, I'm not!" I growl. "I'm not whipped. I'm never whipped."

    "Yeah, yeah," Hunter says. "That's what they all say."

    Instinctively, I glance over at Blaire. She's alone, toying with her gun and swirling it around her thumb.

    "Do you think she hates me?" I ask Hunter.

    He chuckles. "I thought you didn't care."

    "I-" I start off. "I care about what she thinks of me. Always."

    A small smile appears on his face. "I don't think she hates you. I think she hates herself."

    "Why?"

    "Women are complicated that way," he tells me. "She probably thinks it's better if she ignores the situation at hand so she doesn't have to deal with it. Don't do that. Talk to her about it. I guarantee it will help."

    I let out a long sigh. "I guess you're right."

    "Of course I'm right. I'm fucking married. I know my wife better than I know myself."

     That makes me chuckle. "My dad must be lucky to have you. You give the best relationship advice."

    "Amen to that." Hunter chuckles. "Sometimes, I think it's probably the sole reason why he keeps me around."

    My eyes travel to Blaire again. She seems to be watching me intently. I smile at her, just a little, but she looks away swiftly, choosing to ignore me.

    Women are so complicated.

    Hunter gestures to one of the photographers and nods. "You're up, Jackson. Please don't make constipated faces like the last time. Remember—your image reflects your father's image. Do it for him."

    "Whatever." I scowl and head to work.

    I don't do particularly well in photoshoots, and I have a feeling I did worse than usual. I was distracted; my mind was constantly thinking about Blaire.

    I wondered why she refuses to acknowledge the kiss. I wondered why she's just as agitated as I am.

    Maybe her mind is fighting with her heart. She's fighting against what she wants.

    I peek a glance at her, this time when we're in the limo, and she seems quiet. This is the first time I've seen her like this—not being angry at me. She glances at me briefly, then looks away, as if looking at me would bring back unwanted memories of our kiss.

    I don't know how long I can take this anymore. She's going to continue ignoring this until it disappears. I'm not going to let that happen.

      I want to know—I need to know what happened and I want to fix it. Because if I don't fix what is happening between us, I will lose my god damned mind. And she's going to tell me what the hell is happening whether she likes it or not.

    Hunter helps Blaire out of the limo. When I'm out, I turn to him.

      "You think if I confront Blaire about it now, she's going to kick me in the balls?" I ask him.

      He chuckles. "You want to risk it?"

     Yes. I'll do it. Anything for her.

     "It's worth a shot." I shrug.

     "You're a brave man, Jackson." He pats me on the shoulder. "Good luck with that girl. You're going to need it."

      I nod, then quickly bid goodbye to him and trail after Blaire. She is hugging herself with her arms and I want nothing more than to hold her so that she doesn't have to do it herself.

    Sometimes, I want her to let me take care of her, even if she's capable of handling herself. But I want to take away her burden and let her know that I can be someone she can depend on, if she needs to.

    When we're in, Blaire mutters a small "good night" and heads up the stairs.

    "Blaire, wait." The words easily slip out from my mouth.

      She continues to ignore me.

    "Come on, Blaire." I mutter. "For the love of god, just talk to me."

    She stops at her tracks, and her eyes hold mine. They're filled with restlessness and uncertainty.

     "What do you want, Jackson?" She says in defeat.

    "I want you to talk to me." I trudge over to her.

    "About what?" She crosses her arms.

    "You know about what." I hiss.

      "No really I don't." She's trying to play dumb. She's teasing me. She's always teasing me.

      I seethe. "I want to know why the hell you kissed me and left."

    She snorts. "Come on, Jackson. You can't be serious. It's just one kiss. Get over it."

    "Like how you did?" I counter back fiercely and she flinches. Swearing, I rake my fingers through my hair out of frustration. Dammit. I lose all self-control when I'm with her. It's not as satisfying as I thought it would be. "Please. There's a reason why you were being angsty these past few days and it's because of that. My guess is that you didn't think that kiss would have affected you as much as it did."

    "Get over yourself, Jackson." She rolls her eyes. "It's just a kiss. You taunted me into giving you one and I did. And now you're complaining?"

    "I'm not complaining!" I scowl at her. "I just want to understand what is going on between us."

    "Nothing." She shakes her head. "Nothing is going on between us."

    "That's bullshit and you know it," I place my finger under her chin and tilt her face upwards so her eyes can meet mine. "Complete and utter bullshit."

    "Let me go, Jackson." She pushes my hand away and turns away from me but I stop her.

    "Jesus, Blaire!" I yell. "Stop. Stop trying to run away from me. We need to talk about this because if we don't, I feel like I'm about to explode." I take a deep breath and continue on. "We were doing amazing last weekend. And then you kissed me, and now... what? You're disgusted with me?  You want nothing to do with me? What is going on? I feel like I'm going out of my fucking mind."

    "Jackson," she says, her voice steady. "I don't want to talk about this."

    "Then when are we ever going to talk about it?" I demand. "Because knowing you, you'll try to stop me from bringing it up again."

    I look at her—really look at her—and I see a small, vulnerable girl who looks like she's on the verge of falling apart. This is the first time I've seen her like this. She's always so strong, so fierce, so confident but now... she's unravelling before my very eyes. And a part of me likes it. Knowing that I have the ability to undo her like this.

    "Did you kiss me so you can prove a point?" I ask her, my voice softening. "Did you kiss me because I accused you of being scared of your feelings and you wanted to prove to me that you weren't a coward-?"

    "No," she shakes her head. "It's not that at all."

    "Then, why?"

    She looks at me, pleading, as if telling me stop pushing her. I refuse to give into her.

    "Blaire, tell me." I say softly. "Please. I deserve to know too."

    She takes a deep breath.

    "I kissed you because you were right. About everything. Okay?" She says, utterly defeated. "Are you happy now?"

    "What are you talking about?" I raise a curious eyebrow.

    "You're right." She echoes, stepping towards me. "I want you. I'm attracted to you. I always have—perhaps even more after what you told me about more about you. I just didn't want to admit it to myself because I have never felt like this for anyone before. I lied when I said I wasn't scared. What I feel for you terrified the living shit out of me. I've been so alone for so long now and you come into my life and you just tear everything apart and I even don't know who I am anymore when I'm with you-"

    "Blaire..." My voice trails off.

    "You make me so confused, Jackson. You make me lose my own identity when I'm with you," she whispers. "You drive me crazy and I don't like how I feel—I don't like what I feel towards you because I've never experienced anything like this before. I kissed you because I liked you and... I left you after I kissed you because I started thinking that maybe it wouldn't be a good thing if we were together-"

    "Is that why you've been trying to avoid talking about the kiss? Because it makes you feel guilty about your feelings?" I ask and she nods. "Don't feel guilty. You don't get to feel guilty about this."

    "Look, Jackson," she says, her voice more steady. "We wouldn't work—we wouldn't last a day-"

    "Stop it," I tell her, closing the space between us. I reach up to tilt her head so her gaze can level with mine. She's breathing hard, and there's fear in her eyes, fear that I've never seen before. "Stop over-thinking it."

    "How would you know that we wouldn't last?" I whisper. "We've barely even begun."

    Fuck me. Hunter's right. I'm so whipped. So fucking whipped.

    "You have no idea how you make me feel, darling." I caress her cheek and her lip trembles. "No fucking clue. When you kissed me... it was quite possibly the closest thing I have ever felt to heaven."

    She closes her eyes briefly, digesting in my words.

    "Stop trying to resist this, Blaire. Stop trying to resist us. Stop making excuses for why we wouldn't work and take a god damned chance. " I press a kiss on her cheek, near her lips. She gasps, her mouth parted open as I steal all of the air from her body. "You think you can abandon what we have? I highly doubt so. I think we're too far in to stop this from happening." I whisper, my breath hot at her ear.

      She clings unto my arms, her lip trembling.

    "You drive me crazy too, darling." I press another kiss on her jaw. My heart is slamming against my chest hard and quick. I'm scared she's going to push me away. But fortunately, she doesn't. So I take it as an invitation. She moans when my lips make contact with her skin.

     "None of this makes any sense," I say, my voice gruff. "We don't make any sense. But I want you so bad. Especially after that soul-shattering kiss you gave me. I want more, Blaire. So much more than that."

    "Tell me that you don't want this." My lips hover over hers, just inches away. I feel her breath coming out in short spurts, like she can't control herself when she's with me. "Tell me that you don't want this and I promise I'll leave you alone."

    I wait for her answer, expectantly, hoping to god she won't give me the wrong answer.

    "I can't tell you that," she murmurs. "I can't."

    I breathe a sigh of relief. "Good. Because I really want to do this."

    Then, I weave my fingers in her hair and place my lips on hers.

    The kiss

    completely

    obliterates me.

    I bury my hands in Blaire's hair and she presses hers on my chest, her fingers running down my chest. I grasp her face in my huge hands to deepen the kiss, caging her in so I don't give her a chance to protest. She parts her lips for me, slowly but surely, allowing access to her warm mouth. Our tongues clash and our lips mold ravenously and I can almost taste the hunger from her mouth.

    I simply can't get enough of her. Several weeks of sexual tension has finally led to this and holy shit, it's so fucking worth it. It's worth all the cold showers; it's worth all the sweet torture; it's worth everything that we had to go through so we can be in this moment together. I'd endure it all over again if I can replay this moment again and again because this kiss is possibly the most amazing thing I have ever experienced in my entire existence.

    The moan that escapes Blaire's lips send a surge of adrenaline through my cock. Her hands run up my arms, dancing over my biceps, and I cradle her face and angle it so I can press a trail of hot, searing kisses down from her jaw to her collarbone.

    "Fuck," she swear, groaning as I suck on her skin. "Jackson."

    I smile against her collarbone. "Want me to stop?"

      "I'll kill you if you do."

    I chuckle. "Then, I should probably get back to work."

    I heave her up and she takes the opportunity to wrap her legs around my hips. My lips find hers again and I carry her to the kitchen counter, propping her at the very edge of it.

     Part of me tells me that I should slow down, take my time with her, savor every inch of her, but tonight, I'm greedy. I'm selfish. I want her, all of her, all at once, and if I don't, I'll fucking die.

     The soft whimpers that escapes her mouth also suggest me that she feels the same way. She looks at me, pouting, waiting for me impatiently.

I press a light kiss on her lips before helping her out her clothes. I leave the tank top on—I'm saving that for later—but I slide her jeans along with her panties down, then fling it somewhere where I'm 99% sure we'll never see again. But fuck that.

    She smiles, biting her lip as I part her legs open, her ankles digging on the edge of the counter. Seeing her spread open in front of me like this is breathtaking. She looks like a masterpiece and I'm motherfucking Monet.

    "What are you going to do?" She breathes.

    "What people do on tables." I crouch down, my knees dropped to the floor so I have better access of her pussy. "Eat."

    I tease her slowly with my tongue, adding pressure when needed. My tongue swirls, poking and prodding, pushing and pulling. Her hands dig into my hair, encouraging me to keep going. Don't stop. Don't ever stop. Right there. Please, Jackson. Oh, yes.

    Everything that comes out from her mouth is like a prayer. When she moans my name-my full name-it gets me harder each time. I don't stop doing what she wants me to do-lick, tease, blow, kiss, flirt, finger. My tongue is performing a series of dances, relishing every inch of her. She tastes of everything I ever dreamed of and everything that I thought I would never have.

I eat her up like she's my last meal and I'm ravenous for her, for any part of her that she will give me, until instead of whispering my name, she's yelling it from the top of her lungs, her fingers grasping my hair firmly, on the verge of letting go.

    "Jackson, I'm going to.. I'm going to..." she croaks out.

    "Let go, baby." I murmur against her skin. "Let go."

    She moans loudly, my name escaping her tortured lips, and the last of her restraint falls apart. I watch her as she comes undone before me, and I want to sear the image of her coming into my mind forever because that was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

    "Oh god," she says, slumping on the kitchen counter.

    "Are you okay?" I whisper and she nods.

    I get up from my knees and press my lips on hers, my hardness pressing against her slick wet pussy. The only thing separating us is the thin fabric of my pants, which I'm all the more ready to tear off when the time calls for it.

      Blaire groans, her legs wrapping around my waist and her arms sliding around my neck. She kisses me roughly, her lips greedy, her hands tightening around my neck, like she wants me so bad and she never wants to let me go.

    "Where to?" she whispers against my lips.

    "My room," I gasp out, lifting her butt off the counter and walking her up the stairs.

      Our lips never once part when I bring her up to my room. I infiltrate her mouth like I pictured doing in all of my fantasies, my tongue driving into hers, tasting her taste in my mouth, kissing her kiss in my mouth. Her hands stroke the back of my neck, her hips pressed harder against my erection, moving slowly up and down the fabric of my pants.

Fuck, she's torturing me on purpose. And I can't hold out much longer. I'm barely holding on.

    I break away from her kiss long enough to whisper, "Keep doing that and it's going to get really embarrassing for me."

    She laughs quietly. "I want to make you come, Jackson."

    "You can do that when I'm deep inside your pussy," I growl against her ear, biting it softly. "I promise."

      I kick the door open carelessly and when we're both inside the room, I press Blaire up against the wall, latching my mouth unto her neck, my lips leaving hot-scorching kisses all the way down to her collarbone. She moans loudly in response, clinging unto my shoulder, her nails digging into me.

      I press another kiss on her lips before removing my shirt. She helps me, her hands trembling as she unbuttons it, then pushes the material off my body. Her eyes widen when she drinks in my body, her gaze roaming from the top of my chest, down to the abs, all the way to the navel. I chuckle when she smiles satisfyingly, like I had somehow passed some kind of test that I didn't know I was taking.

    "Take me to bed," she whispers and I oblige her.

    I carry her to the bed, then gently lay her down on the mattress.  I take the opportunity throw the covers away, letting it slide to the floor.

      "Why did you do that?" she eyes the thrown covers.

      "We don't need covers for what we're about to do here," I whisper.

      She stares at me, biting her lip as I quickly kick my shoes off, then unzip my pants and step out of them, leaving me in just my underwear. I help her out of the rest of her clothes—first her top, then her bra. When she's completely naked under me, she grins, her eyes she's challenging me to do something about the current state she's in.

    "I love your tits, Blaire," I whisper. "Fucking obsessed with them. I've been wanting to do this for a long time now."

    I dip my head down and latch unto one of her nipples, and she cries from the pleasure of it all. My hands kneed her other breast while I make love to the other with my tongue. My teeth graze her nipple and she thrashes beneath me, squirming, her hands digging deep into my hair to prevent me from doing anything else other than worship her body.

     "Ohmygod," she moans. "More, Jax. More."

I twirl her soft peaks with my tongue, slowly but surely, so she can feel what I'm doing to her. She whimpers, a plea to keep going, and I do, sucking and licking her nipples. It's been a dream of mine to taste her here and now that I have, I don't ever want to stop.

My hands have gone fucking AWOL. I'm touching her everywhere, all at once, until I'm not sure where I'm touching, but as long as I make her feel really good, I honestly don't give a fuck anymore. She moans, then sucks on my bottom lip and runs her tongue along it. Damn her. Damn this sexy girl and her ability to undo me. An incoherent sound emits from the back of my throat, somewhat like a groan and moan morphed together.

      I love how she's making me feel. I love the way her hands feel on my body—her hands touching my chest, breathing hard, her fingers dancing over my pecs, outlining each one, her thumbs sliding over my lips like she needs to remember everything about this moment otherwise she would combust.

She doesn't know it but I do the same to her too. I want to memorize the way she responds to my kisses and my touches. I want to remember the sexy sounds that she makes when I'm exploring her body with my hands and fingers. And I want to capture the hunger on her face when I slide out of my underwear, allowing my erection to spring free.

      She licks her lips when she sees the length of my cock and I grin wickedly, knowing all too well what's going to happen next.

    I reach over my drawer to grab a condom but Blaire grabs my arm and shakes her head. "I'm on the pill," she says.

    "Thank fuck," I murmur, "because I really want to feel you bare against me."

    She nods, her arms sliding around my waist, pulling me to her. I spread her legs open, then kiss my way from her stomach, all the way up to her breasts. She holds me by my arms, and when I look at her, I see the concern that is written on her face.

    "Do you want this, Blaire?" I ask hesitantly. "I'm not going to force you if you don't want to do this-"

    "Stop talking, please," she rolls her eyes. "I let you give me head in the kitchen counter and now I'm naked beneath you in bed, my legs spread open for you. Of course I want this, you idiot. Now please, get inside me."

    I chuckle softly. "As you wish, darling."

    I grab her leg behind the knee with my right hand, joining our lips together once again, before I thrust inside of her. She screams inside my mouth and I immediately still inside her.

    "Shit, did I hurt you?" I ask, worried. "Are you hurt-"

    "No." She shakes her head. "You feel good. Really good. Please, don't stop."

    I do what she says. I don't stop. I thrust into her, deep and hard, my groans matching hers, filling the entire room. Her knees fall open as she holds unto my body, her fingers digging into my butt to encourage me to keep going. Her lips part open, her eyes fluttering and drifting, and the sounds that come out from her mouth sing in my ears like fucking heaven.

    "Fuck, baby," I pant, my cock plunging in and out of her. "You feel amazing."

    "Please, Jackson, please," she moans. "Harder."

    I drive into her, harder, faster, pushing in as deep as I can go. She screams, her body clenching and unclenching beneath me, whimpering each time I push in and out of her. She responds the same way, her hips buckling, raising upwards just as I drive in. Her breasts bounce with every thrust I make, and her hands clench around my arms, clinging unto me for dear life as I rock my hips into hers.

Her eyes roll back from the pleasure and each time my name escapes those lips of hers, I soar higher and higher. I can feel her nipples brushing against my chest, her hands tightening around my back, her gasps filling the air, forming precipitation on my lips.

    Blaire, Blaire, Blaire, my heart is pounding her name so loudly I can almost hear it. She shivers under the heat of my skin as I glide my palm up her arm. I moan her name and roll my tongue over her nipple, my mouth knowing and tasting her.

    "Come with me, darling," I whisper against her ear, groaning as I dive into her at an increasing speed. She yells my name from the top of her lungs, her body shuddering uncontrollably beneath me as the climax hits her.

      "Fuck!" I scream, joining in on her cries. Pure red-hot ecstasy radiates through my body, convulsing with pleasure. She spreads her legs wider apart as I grab her hips and thrust into her one last time, completely losing it.

    When our climax subsides, our heavy pants echo around the room. I fall unto the mattress beside Blaire and angle my head so I can see her. I pull her into my arms and kiss her bare shoulder. She shivers slightly, her eyes fluttering close. I chuckle when she pulls the covers that I've thrown off bed to sheath both of our bodies.

      "Don't tell me you're tired already," I murmur, my hands sliding down her arm.

      "No," she half-says, half-yawns and I laugh harder.

    "Darling," I say, thumbing her lips. "This is just the beginning. I told you I'm going to be the best you've ever had. And I intend to fulfill that promise."

    "Promise fulfilled," she breathes.

    I chuckle. "Not yet. I want to give you everything tonight. I want to taste you. Everywhere. I want to fuck you on every single surface imaginable. If you'd let me, of course. Unless..." I run my finger over her thighs, causing her to shiver. "... you're already tired."

    "Me? Tired? Psssh." she snorts. "Bring it on, Jackson."

And I do.

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A/N: HAPPY FUCKING NEW YEARS EVERYONE! AND YOU'RE WELCOME, REDEEMERS!

I'm so glad I got to start the year with this JAIRE chapter. I really hope you enjoyed it! This chapter was SUCH A PAIN IN THE ASS TO WRITE I SWEAR. Idk why but it was just very difficult for me. Especially in the beginning.

So what do you think? Let me know in the comments section below! I wouldn't say that JAIRE is OFFICIALLY together right now... there's still a lot more installed for them. I guess we'll have to find out later!

Also, I'd like to tell you guys that since (as if reading this chapter) I'm in UK preparing for my studies and such, I WILL BE TAKING A TWO WEEK HIATUS from UPDATING on Wattpad. It's okay! It's just a temporary thing! I just really need to concentrate more on adjusting to my new life here and also focus on my studies, at least for a little while. Also, I'm running out of drafts and I don't know how long I can sustain updating without having to replenish them with MORE drafts.

Fear not! It's only a hiatus from UPDATING. I'll be active on Wattpad and other social medias like Twitter, Instagram and Facebook. So don't worry! I just have a lot going on right now and I just need to take a breather. I've been so focused on trying to cough out more chapters and I'm kind of losing my mojo here. I need to gain back my inspiration too.

Next update: 22nd/29th January (Will let you guys know when I'm certain!)

Sorry for the inconvenience guys! I feel like I'm letting you guys down!

But meanwhile, when I'm gone... #JAIREFORLYFEYO

Love, Claudia.