Insecurities

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Diana put her books, inkwell, and quills away. Hugo taught her all about sounds of certain letters, and she was able to put together a few simple words on her own, such as "and" "cat" and "bird." Diana was getting very excited to learn spelling and it was touching for Hugo to see somebody so determined to learn. But of course they could only teach for so long, and Diana had to go home for the day, and let Hugo escape to enjoy the rest of his day. "Hey, Hugo do you know somebody by the name of Heinrich?" He nodded. "I'll have Haytham lead you to his workshop." Diana nodded. "Also Alexander wanted to let everybody know that he misses everybody. Especially Hedwig." Hugo chuckled. "I'm not surprised. He was his baby. Always giving him treats, and helping him when he needed it. Alexander loved having him as a little brother." Diana looked at the man as he left for the hallway. "Aww."

In the kitchen the rumble of pots and pans could be heard, and when she went in, James was pulling something out of the oven. They were gingersnaps and Haytham was eyeing the treats. "One batch of gingersnaps." He placed them on a plate to cool off. When Hatham reached for them he gave his hand a swat. "Not till after they cool down." As they were washing dishes, a gold watcher walked in with a bold expression and distinguished cheekbones. His eye lights were bright, and was a tower. "Heinrich! Just in time! I made gingersnaps. When they cool down feel free to have some." Diana looked. So that was Heinrich. She wanted to tell him Thomas sends his love, but he was scary. "What's wrong Diana? Oh, don't be afraid. Heinrich is a kind man. Though he doesn't speak much English." The man got out a pen and paper, but James laughed. "She can't read." They looked at each other both unable to speak. Heinrich then decided to make his hands in the shape of a heart. To that Diana smiled doing the same. "Thomas says hi." Heinrich nodded understanding enough. She grinned.

Once James snagged a gingersnap, they headed for the door. Before they left they heard the clicking of a cane. "Hold up, miss O'Conner." Hedwig handed Alexander's diary back. "It was less juicy than I expected, but I found plenty of content I enjoyed. He wrote a great deal of you." He said grinned. She only suspected as much being a newcomer. "Alexander says he misses you." Hedwig grinned and then cleared his throat. "Tell him I miss him too."

~~~~~

Thomas was taking measurements, taking into account the dimensions of the doorway. As he was writing them down, Alexander was standing in corner measuring the walls. He struck up some conversation. "I'm taking Diana to the tavern again." He said casually. Thomas looked at him wondering if this was his attempt at a date. "Being around men all the time isn't healthy. She needs women's company too." Thomas leaned in. "Is this you... asking her on a date?" He smiled. "I won't let her drink. I've seen how flirty she gets when she's drunk. I'm not letting her bring another Murphy home."

He then looked down. "I was about to kill him, you know. In the cellar. I felt like it would've been so easy. If the twins weren't down there..." his hands tightened into fists. Thomas took him by the lapels. "Hold it together man. He's not gonna be coming back. Leave it at that. You want Judas to throw you at Malak's mercy?" Alexander took a deep breath leaning against the door frame. "Well... good thing he's at the Wiltshire's I suppose." He tossed his hat to the ground, and then noticed right next to it. A candle. The very candle from that night. His heart fell down to his stomach. "What's this? Why is this on the floor?" Thomas wondered, as he lifted the candle. "That dumb fool must've kicked it when it fell over as he was trying to get out of the room." Alexander's ears rang when Thomas jumped to that conclusion. He sighed. "Heh. Yep. The stupid idiot must've." Alexander agreed. There was no chance that he would admit doing such a thing.

"Maybe it's time we took a tea break." Alexander said placing his hat back on, wanting to ignore the candle. Diana would never kiss him again if she knew he destroyed nearly all her possessions. That much he could be sure of, best to just move on. Tea would settle his thoughts.

As if right on cue his favorite tea maker walked into the house, with James right behind her. "We're home." James chimed. He placed the mail on the table where they always drank their tea. Clearly they were getting ready for tea time. Diana walked into the kitchen to brew their tea. Benjamin woke from his nap to join in. They told Diana that crumpets would be acceptable if she was in the mood to make them. As they all sat down, Alexander flipped through the mail. He handed everybody their letters, and a tea stained envelope caught Alex's eye. When he saw the address and sender his blood boiled. He set that angrily to the side.

Benjamin chuckled. "Come now, what is this?" He picked it up smiling, his smile slowly faded. "Oh... Oh, I see..." He sat back. "Maybe you should read it to her. You're good with sensitive matters." He said looking at Alex as he set it down. Alex looked at the letter. "This piece of rubbish is going into the fireplace." The boys all stared at the letter. No doubt they knew where it came from. "I'm not letting her get hurt by that bastard. If Murphy has anything he wants to say to her, he can talk to my fist." He said making a decision on it. "This letter is headed straight to Ashville and that is final. I don't want to see this letter."

"What letter?" It was swiped by Diana.

"Ahh!" Alexander took it back, and stood up keeping it behind his back. "It's just junk mail, Diana. Nothing serious." She squinted her eyes, and dashed around him. Once in sight she yanked it away, and tried reading it. "What is it?" Benjamin raised an eyebrow while Alexander was signaling him to can it. "It's a letter from Murphy to you." She glanced at the letter. "I see..." Alexander ran a hand down his face. "Well, I can't read, so this will stay closed until I can." She looked at her master's unhappiness. "I know you want to keep me safe, but he can't touch me now, and if this was an apology, and plea to take me back you know it would be denied. I'm tougher than I look. Don't worry." He watched her put it on a nearby table to put away later. "Now who wants tea?" All three cups were raised as Alex sat down slowly.

Later that night, Alexander was trying to sleep, but it was proving difficult. Along with the fact that he was hiding the fact that he started the fire, Murphy was still reaching out to Diana, and he was sleeping in the guest room, he was also debating what to do about Benjamin, and Peter. Was it even a good idea to tell his closest confidant about Peter's last name? Did he even know he had a son? Did he die before he was born? So many thoughts flooded his mind. He needed to soak in the tub. He grabbed a towel from his room, and noticed Diana wasn't inside. Probably still doing dishes downstairs. He let himself in the bathroom, but froze at the sight.

"Good Lord."

Diana laid naked in the tub, soap bubbles covering the top of the tub hiding everything under her neck. She pounced covering her chest. "Oh my God!" She exclaimed. Immediately Alex used his hat to cover his eyes, feeling entirely embarrassed. "I'm so sorry, Diana! I didn't mean to intrude!" She looked to the side. "You didn't see anything, right?" Alexander shook his head. "No! I'm really sorry!" Diana huffed. "Go wait in your room, I'll be out in a few minutes." He was more than happy to leave. He closed the door behind himself his rose gold cheeks burning,

In about three minutes she came out her hair wrapped up, and her body covered with a towel. "Next time, just knock." She says staring at the man sitting on the bed. "Well, I never expected you to use my bathtub." She grinned. "Next time I'll ask." She said softly. He turned toward her and his eyes looking at the towel dip. She. must've not felt it but he saw a glimpse of red scars. "I'm sorry if this is intrusive, but what happened to your back?" She paused pulling out clothes. "Let me get dressed, and I'll tell you. He turned away, and she then stood in front of him in a white blouse, and night skirt. She turned her back toward him lifting the back of her shirt. It looked like pink patches. "Who did this to you?" He said placing a hand on her skin.

"My step father, Alex." He felt his lip tremble, but held it together. "Take a good look, Alex. This is what happened to me. Could you live with this? Somebody with a scarred up back like mine?" He wrapped his arms tightly around her and pulled her scarred back against his chest. "You are more the woman I ever knew. Scars and all." She smiled and held her hands over his.

"...now about that kiss."

She rolled her eyes knowing he would bring it up. "I can't help it. It's all I've been thinking about." She sighed. "Listen, Alex.... What would the other manors think? You falling in love with a maid? I'm not rich, or proper, or covered in a layer of precious metals. I'm just a maid. Besides, after seeing what happened to my back do you really think you could love such a blemished creature?" He stared at her, and stood in front of her. Slowly he unbuttoned his waistcoat, and removed his shirt showing his back. The long horizontal scars she saw from before were now more prominent. She traced her fingers along them slowly. "How did you get these?" He sighed, "By doing the right thing." He said looking over his shoulder. "We have more in common than you think." He said ruffling her hair. She smiled her eyes following him as he walked into the bathroom.

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