Hot Air Buffoon P1

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The city skyline, with a clear sky overhead.

Narrator: The city of Towns--

He is interrupted by a very agitated Mayor.

Mayor: Never mind all that hoo-ha! I got an emergency! Powerpuff Girls, help!

The Mayor jumped at his desk and held up the hotline. He just gotten word of two men robbing a bank; they resemble Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble.

Mayor: The bank is being burgled by barefoot bandits!

Soon the girls were beating the robbers into submission.

Mayor: Oh... thanks.

Later In the office, he calls again.

Mayor: Powerpuff Girls, help!

There was a dinosaur in the city streets; it breathed fire as townspeople panic.

Mayor: A dinosaur is destroying downtown!

Soon Buttercup and Bubbles were tying the beast's legs in a knot while Blossom uses her ice breath on it.

Mayor: Uh... thank you.

Later

Mayor: Powerpuff Girls, help!

At the jewelry store, large, ugly girl in a baby-doll dress, carrying buckets of jewelry, busted out of the store. She is based on Jill from Jack and Jill.

Mayor: Jewels are being jacked by Jill!

Soon the girls were beating the robber with the buckets.

Mayor: Uh... thanks.

In the Mayor laid in his desk and rubbed his head.

Mayor: Pheeeew! What a day, eh, Ms. Bellum?

He looked at the back of a fat woman with curly red-orange hair and wearing a red dress. The strings of an apron are tied at her waist. The Mayor does a double take when he sees that this is not Ms. Bellum, his trusted assistant.

Mayor: Who the heck are you?!

The woman turned. Her face is repulsive at best: a hairy chin, big nose with a wart on it, serious five o'clock shadow. She has a mop and bucket next to her.

Cleaning lady: I'm the nighttime cleaning lady.

Mayor: Well, you're in kinda early, then. We don't pay overtime, you know.

Cleaning lady: It's 11:30.

Mayor: 11:30?! (laughing) Well, I guess time sure flies when I'm keeping my fair city safe.

Cleaning Lady: You clod! Do you really believe that you are responsible for keeping this town safe?! You, little man, are nothing but a political beard hiding behind the real head of this town!

She was harsh, but not untruthful.

Mayor: Uh-- Who? Ms. Bellum?

Cleaning lady: No! The Powerpuff Girls! They're the ones busting their butts and risking their lives out there in the mess, while you sit here in the comfort of your easy chair!

Mayor: Uh-- Well, I do the phone thingy...

Cleaning Lady: Oh! Well, pardon me! If anything should happen to your dialing finger!

Cleaning lady said as she was talking sarcastically, walking away.

The door slams behind her, then opens a moment later. She sticks her head in.

Cleaning lady: P.S., I didn't vote for you.

She slammed the door again.

Mayor: Ooh, I'll show her!

He reached over to pick up the hotline.

Mayor: I'll have the Powerpuff Girls beat her up!

He picks up the receiver and flexes his fingers, but stops himself from pushing the button to dial them up. It is at this moment he realizes she is right. A disgruntled look comes into his eye as he calmly hangs up. Long pause. He flung the phone against the wall, smashing to pieces, as the he screams. He has just snapped. He slams his head on the desk and begins tearing up the office and pulling his own hair out. Through the room; everything is now in shambles, and the Mayor is lying on the floor in the middle of the destruction. Just then he heard the door open, and a strange looking man walked in.

Next morning

Ms. Bellum stepped in the office, carrying a cup of coffee. She gasps and drops the cup when she sees the wrecked room and the Mayor at the remains of his desk.

Ms. Bellum: Mayor, are you all right?!

Mayor: All right? All right?! I feel great! In fact, I've never felt better IN MY LIFE!! I'm glad you're here, Ms. Bellum, 'cause it's time to get to work!

Ms. Bellum: Work? What work? All you ever do is sit around calling the Power--

Mayor: ENOUGH OF YOUR SILLY TALK!! It's time to seize the helm, baby!

He grunts and does a low hand-pump.

Ms. Bellum: Uh-- Do you want me to leave for that?

Mayor: To the roof, my good woman!

He jumps down off the desk and climbs the stairs. He messed with a hatch, opened it, and he steps out, laughing, with Ms. Bellum behind him.

Ms. Bellum: Mayor, where are we going?

Mayor: Patience, woman, you'll know soon enough!

He pointed to a hot-air balloon tethered to the roof. It has a purple and yellow check pattern and is decorated with ribbons and sashes.

Mayor: Behold... the Dirigible! Oh, gosh, she's a beauty...

Ms. Bellum: Mayor, what's about to happen?

Mayor: I'm glad you asked that question, Ms. Bellum. What's about to happen is, I...THE MAYOR OF TOWNSVILLE...am embarking on a new deal! No longer will I sit on my rear and have others doing my work! For I...THE MAYOR OF TOWNSVILLE...will defend my precious city from the likes of evil criminals! Because I am...THE MAYOR OF TOWNSVILLE!! Keep an eye on things for me, Ms. Bellum.

He jumps into the balloon and ducks down, coming up in a WWI aviator helmet and bomber jacket.

Ms. Bellum: Oh, no. I can't let you go into this crazy thing alone!

She began stepping into the ballon, climbing in, as the Mayor starts to undo the tether.

Mayor: As you wish. You can be my trusty sidekick! And away we go!

The rope falls free as they were off. The Mayor looked down upon the city.

Mayor: Whoo-hoo! Higher! Farther! Faster! Citizens of Townsville, do not fear! Your Mayor is here! From up here I can see everything! All of Townsville will be under my watchful eye!

Ms. Bellum: But, sir, what could you possibly do to protect Townsville while floating at the mercy of every stray wind in a hopelessly unguidable hot-air balloon?

Mayor:Well, I'll show you, Ms. Smarty Face!

He rummaged around in a small bag.

Ms. Bellum: "Smarty Face?"

Mayor: I got it stashed right down here somewhere...

After a few seconds, he comes up with a spyglass. He puts it to his eye and begins to look around.

Mayor: The opening chapter in a book called "Justice"! With this new-fangled close-up seeing contraption, I can close in on despicable crime-committers committing crimes despicably.

He rummages around again for a moment. He then pulled out and held up a boxing glove on an extendable arm.

Mayor: The closing chapter in a book called "Justice"! I call this baby ..."The Equalizer!"

He extends the arm, scaring a bird away.

Mayor: Bullseye!

He put on the spyglass and looked down upon the city.

Mayor: Things seem to be quiet in Townsville Park.

Just then, he heard a scream.

Mayor: Hark!

He looked down and saw a mugger holding an old woman at knifepoint.

Mayor: A heinous act! Time to equalize! Take this, no-gooder!

The Mayor pulled out the Equalizer. He deploys his weapon. The glove was fired toward the mugger. The blow connects; knocking the mugger to the ground.

Mayor: Direct hit!

He began laughing triumphantly. Ms. Bellum began clapping.

Ms. Bellum: Yaaaay! Wow, Mayor, I'm impressed! I mean, I have my doubts, but you have a real knack for this.

Mayor: Oh, crime fighting's a breeze. You just have to know where to look.

He soon caught a man breaking into a car.

Mayor: Like the mall parking lot! Oh, no, you don't... Mr. Grand Theft Auto!

The Mayor fired The Equalizer. The crook turned around in surprise. The crook was knocked through the car window.

Mayor: Two for two! Hmmm...at this rate, we won't need those girls anymore! But I digress. Crime is afoot, and I am here to give a hand in fighting it! Forward, Ms. Bellum!

The balloon went forward.

Meanwhile a man was walking down the sidewalk. He comes to a lemonade stand.

Man: Convenient! I'm thirsty! I'll take some lemonade, kids.

He drinks it down and drops the cup toward a trash can at his feet. It bounces off the rim and lands on the ground. There is a sudden crash; freeze frame of the man and the lemonade stand being smashed by the Equalizer, having been caught by the Mayor when he saw the minor crime.

Mayor: Take that, litterbug!

Meanwhile, a little boy was walking down the street.

Boy: I love being a kid, I got my whole life ahead of me.

He crosses a stop sign and onto a busy street. Just then, the Equalizer punched the boy in the face, knocking him back from the busy street and knocking him into a trash can.

Mayor: Take that! Jaywalker!

Meanwhile with a construction worker. He inserts a check into the ATM; receiving a stack of cash from the machine.

Worker: Finally, my first paycheck. Now I can pay all those bills!

Another impact is heard, cutting him off mid-sentence. Freeze frame of him being hit over the head by the Equalizer. The money flies everywhere.

Ms. Bellum: Mayor, that guy was only making a withdrawal from his account!

Mayor: No time for small talk now! I've got crimes to bust!

Meanwhile at a boxing ring, where a fight is in progress.

White boxer: Hey, what's that behind you?

The black boxer turned his head

Black boxer: Who? What? Where?

His head flew back as he was taking an Equalizer blow to the head.

Mayor: That'll keep you ruffians at bay!

Ms. Bellum: Mayor, those people are paid to fight. They're boxers!

Mayor: Ooh, look, more criming!

He starts punching in all directions with the Equalizer as Ms. Bellum tries to stop him, to no avail.

Mayor: Take this! And some of this! And a little of that! And how about some of this? And maybe one of these? Vile scum!

Ms. Bellum: Mayor, those are tourists! Oh, my gosh! Sorry! Please visit again soon! Mayor, control yourself! Please stop! Oh, don't!

Narrator: Oh, no! The Mayor's gone stark raving mad! Where are the Powerpuff Girls when you need them?!

Meanwhile at the Powerpuff Girls house, Blossom looked down at the hotline.

Blossom: Our phone hasn't rung all day...

She looked in the living room.

Blossom: You guys! It hasn't rung all day!

Bubbles and Buttercup are playing a video game with the characters from Puppet Pals. In the game. In the game, Clem is being hit repeatedly over the head by Mitch.

Bubbles, Buttercup, and Y/N were sitting on beanbags. Buttercup was sitting on Y/N's lap. Buttercup leaned back against Y/N, her head resting on his shoulder. Y/N blushed at her. She smirked and kissed his cheek.

Blossom: The phone hasn't rung all day!

Buttercup: So what? You know that the Mayor always calls when something is wrong.

Buttercup kept playing and winning.

Bubbles: Oh!... You're bonking me!

Blossom flies into their view and faces them.

Blossom: But that's just it! The Mayor always calls, and he hasn't today. That's what's so weird. I think something's wrong.

Y/N nervously raised his hand.

Y/N: I agree.

Blossom: Thank you!

Blossom picked Y/N up by the arm and took them over to the hotline with her. Buttercup scoffed and rolled her eyes in annoyance.

Buttercup: Yeah, yeah. All I know is, I'm bonking up a new high score!

Bubbles: Blossom's right. He does always call.

She joined Blossom and Y/N at the hotline.

Bubbles: Maybe we should call him.

Blossom: I'll give it a try.

She picks up the receiver, but gets a recording that startles her.

Recording: We're sorry, the number you have reached has been disconnected. Please hang up and try again.

Blossom slowly hung up.

Blossom: Well, that didn't work.

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