...When I Didn't Even Know I Needed It

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Edited 6/25/22.

A/N: This chapter is probably the saddest so far. Please read with caution.

***

"So when- when did you get married..?"

"...Yesterday. We figured if we were going to die today, we'd at least end things with no regrets."

"Heh." Brad's chuckle comes out more like a strained exhale. "No invite? Rude."

"Brad..."

"I'm kidding. I'm just- trying to make you laugh."

It's dark around the two friends as the sun has begun to fall away. Tall trees and bundles of leaves force natural light out, and everything is masked in dim shadow. As promised, it's quiet. It still smells like foliage and rain.

A strong, sweet coppery scent is pouring from Brad's body because of his gaping chest wound. Cracks have continued to crawl up his neck. They're also beginning to crawl down his shoulders toward his arms. Marshall has taken it upon himself to drape his jacket over his friend. It's an attempt made at hiding the fatal wound. A leather garment actually makes it seem like Brad is okay.

But they both know better.

His ruby eyes appear clouded and distant. His body is still trembling. Involuntary shivers force the newborn to suck in short breaths. His lower body isn't moving. It's unclear if Brad can even feel it anymore.

Marshall settles on the ground by a tall tree. Skinnier plants are lining the surrounding area. Small dandelions are sprouting in multiple spots, but the dirt beneath them is mostly overrun by grass.

He's sitting with his legs out in front of him. His injured comrade is still being cradled against a broad chest.

It's strange to not have the temperature difference anymore.

At the same time, it's a bit comforting. If Brad has to go through his final moments like this, at least he can do so in the warm embrace of someone who loves him.

"Brad, I-" Marshall feels an uncomfortable tightness building in his throat. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry- I didn't mean for this to happen. I never wanted you to find out what I am. And if you ever did, I didn't want you to find out like this. I'm sorry."

"There's nothing to- to apologize for." A quaking smile is offered. "It wasn't my secret to know. I'm not mad. I'm just- I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything wrong."

"I'm your best friend. And now you're- you're going to have to say goodbye." Brad's voice wavers as if he wants to cry, but he's physically no longer able to do so. "You have a big heart. When you love- you love hard. I know I'm going to die. And when that happens- my pain will end. But yours will- it'll continue. And I'm so sorry to have to put you through that- that agony."

Blackened eyes swarm with fresh tears. They fall down pale cheeks. They're not wiped away despite leaving an itchy sensation against the moldable flesh.

Marshall can't help but look off to the side. He can't handle the acceptance on his friend's face.

Brad is young; barely twenty four. While he may have pursued his dream career and lived life as happily as he could—it's not fair that it's being ripped away from him like this.

"You should've let me take the hit," Marshall states, his voice breaking as he cries. "You had your whole life ahead of you. If it weren't for me, you could've had the chance to have a family one day- you could've had kids or grown old. You could've had the world at your disposal. And now- it's all for nothing..! You risked your life for a monster like me-"

"You're not a monster," Brad interrupts. "You're not a monster, Marsh. You're my friend. My brother. You- you gave me a chance when no one else did. We can't help the things we naturally are."

Marshall's only response is a harsh sob. He tries to bite his lip to stifle such noises, but it's painful. His chest aches and burns. He just wants to scream.

"You're not a- a monster because... 'You rescued me when I didn't even know I needed it'."

He shudders. A sharp cough escapes him. The cracks marring his skin are making their way around the edges of his face. Both arms are no longer twitching or moving. Bodily trembles have stopped. Glazed over eyes appear even more distant. And a quivering smile is still present.

"Marsh..." Brad stifles a pained gasp. " You were, and are, my greatest treasure. That's why I jumped in when Yasmine tried to... I may not have had a long life, but you gave me enough- enough happiness and love to last me for eternity. When no one cared to give me a chance- you did. You loved me for me. I couldn't ask for more- more than that. You gave me smiles. And laughs. And a person to trust- and confide in. You've been my source of light during my darkest days. Now, even in death, I want to- to continue to be that for you."

"...Is there anything I can do for you?" Marshall asks. "Can I do anything to make your final moments any better?"

"You're here. That's-- that's all I need."

"Please- there's got to be something. A song you want to hear- a place you want to go- please, just let me do something for you."

"Hm... I've always wanted to see the cherry blossoms- in Japan. I've never been able to. I'd love to see a- a cherry blossom tree- at least once before I go."

Marshall doesn't speak. He just offers the most genuine smile he can muster.

For a moment, he closes his eyes and hunches forward. A long, deep inhale is taken. When it's released, the scenery around the two begins to change as he uses his ability.

A majority of the tattoos along his arms disappear. An array of differing flower species sprout out of the ground. From roses to sunflowers to orchids to carnations—a damp forest floor becomes engulfed in a fluorescent rainbow of colors. Each flower is sparkling. And soft. The smell of sweet copper is overtaken by the scent of a continuously blooming garden.

Behind Marshall, a large tree trunk emerges. The towering plant tapers off in multiple directions as it grows. Numerous winding branches bend and morph high above. Glowing pink cherry blossoms reach full bloom within a matter of seconds. A few petals fall in response to a gentle breeze in the area.

Against the shadows of the forest, a group of shimmering constellations appear. Stars dance in the surrounding darkness, and they illuminate both vampires in a faint white glow.

To top it all off, a small beam of light flies high above the two friends. It bursts, erupting into shining crystal fragments. They look like raindrops but fall like snow.

It's magical. Ethereal.

"Wow..." Brad gasps. He looks around with eyes full of wonder.

Marshall focuses on his friend's features.

The older male finds comfort in knowing that Brad most likely doesn't feel his injuries anymore.

Because it's so bad.

Cracks are cascading down the entirety of both arms. His face is crumbling toward the outer edges. Deep marks are beginning to close in near his inner cheeks and forehead. Ruby eyes are more of a muted reddish brown.

Fortunately, he's lucid enough to still be able to take in his surroundings. It gives Marshall only a small bit of peace of mind.

"...I don't want my death to- to mean thunder and blizzards and ice. I want it to mean birds and light and the open sky- just as my life has been for you. When you think of me- I don't want you to hurt. I may be gone, but I'm not missing. I'll still be with you. I'll still be your sun. Your warmth. When you think of me- even when you're sad- please- be warm."

Brad speaks with a tone of finality—like he really is ready to die. Like he's okay with things being the way that they are.

He couldn't completely control the way that he lived. But he sure as hell will get some semblance of control in the way that he dies. In the way that he'll say goodbye to this world—this life.

Brad doesn't want to be sad, or angry, or bitter. He just wants to be happy. He just wants to enjoy the moments he has left. Now that there's no pain, everything is blissfully numb. Except for his heart.

He may be a vampire. He may be mere minutes from death. But he's warm. And his heart is full.

Brad knows that when he passes on, it'll be in the arms of someone who cares for him. Someone who will miss him. Someone who will carry on his memory for the rest of eternity.

One pessimistic thought that Brad has is that he's disappointed. He doesn't want to say goodbye to Marshall. They both deserve to truly experience a lifelong friendship.

Although he's just a smidge upset, there is something that's keeping the newborn in high spirits.

"Who knows, maybe we'll meet again- in the next life."

Marshall allows his expression to soften. "And we'll get the chance to experience everything together all over again. We'll get the chance to be a family again. You'll be the greatest dancer in the world. You'll be an even better actor than me." A forced out laugh is mixed with a choked sob. "You'll get everything you've ever wanted."

"If I have you as my friend... that's all I'll ever need."

The two draw their attention up to the cherry blossom tree behind them. Small petals float down alongside tiny specks of falling crystals. It's a glittering, shimmering display.

A spectacle that's both bright and beautiful.

"Marsh- it- it's getting dark."

Sharp tightness morphs into painful stinging in Marshall's throat. He allows for heavy tears to fall, but he holds back everything else. He holds back his anger. He holds back his sadness. He holds back his grief.

He holds back everything.

Only happiness shines through.

He runs a hand through Brad's curls one last time. The younger man is pulled into a delicate hug.

"It's okay, Brad. It's okay." Marshall's voice continues to break with every word. "Hey, I love you. I love you so much. And I just want you to know- I may have only known you for a few years, but you gave me enough happiness to last me thousands of lifetimes. I'm so, so grateful to have had the opportunity to call you my friend. But really- you were more than that. You were more than family to me. I loved you with everything that I had. And I hope it was enough. I hope that- even though you weren't able to have the longest life- even if you weren't able to have all of your wants and dreams fulfilled- at the end of it all, I hope you know that you were loved. You were loved, Brad. And you still are.

"You've been the greatest friend I could've ever asked for. So do what you do best, and fly free."

Brad's smile widens. To Marshall's surprise, Romero lifts both hands up. He pulls his friend into a tight embrace.

Dull eyes close. Forced breathing stops. And he's only able to muster up a delicate whisper for his final parting statement.

"I love you, Marsh. And- thank you. For- for being my friend. My brother. Just- thank you..."

Aside from flowers and leaves blowing in the wind, it's silent. For a second, it's all still. It's all frozen.

Marshall clenches his jaw when he feels Brad's arms slip away. The world moves in slow motion when they fall to the ground with a quiet thud. His head lulls backward now that it's no longer supported by his neck.

Marshall pulls back. He takes in the state of his friend's features.

Brad's face is full of cracks. Portions of his skin have broken off. His injuries make it seem like he's still in pain. But even though this is the case, he looks peaceful. It just looks like Brad is asleep.

His smile is still present.

In silence, everything fades away. Tattoos reappear in their rightful places. Shimmering light is lost to encompassing darkness. Emotional pain turns into full blown, physical agony.

Marshall doubles over. Tears stream down his face. He screams.

And he wails into the night at the loss of his best friend.

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