i'm home now and jongsuk didn't seem suspicious of my whereabouts since i was out with the boys for a couple hours. does he trust me now? did he find out already? all these thoughts came into mind when i walked straight into my bedroom, passed jongsuk who was working in the living room while jazz music softly played from the tv.

"y/n. please come see for a moment." i hear his voice from behind the door.

i swiftly get up from reading my textbook and head to the kitchen and i smell my favorite food, kimchi fried rice. jongsuk has never made me food before...

"please eat." he said with a monotone voice.

i forget my worries and dig in, giving him a thumbs up when he started staring at me probably wanting my approval. after this he began to dig in too. i remember the plan taehyung told me, get jongsuk to trust me more so maybe he can realize the craziness of his plans.

"how was work?" i attempt to spark conversation.

"good, love." he replies without looking at me.

"i got a 100% on a history test today... and i brought home extra credit work."

"as it is your responsibility to get good grades, you should be getting perfect scores."

i knew he wouldn't give me a compliment. i start to pick at my food, my chopsticks playing around with a piece of meat.

"do you actually love me jongsuk?" i ask carefully. not making eye contact.

"of course my love." he replied, monotone again.

"do you actually? or do you just like the idea of loving me?" i ask, my voice hard this time.

he immediately looks up to my eyes and scoffs.

"i just don't like the idea of you being with another man." he says bitterly.

"you fell in love with a four year old didn't you?" i ask softly. i see his eyes change, they're so cold and now filled with warmth.

"you don't know what your parents have done y/n." he said softly.

"then what happened with my sister?" i snap back.

"i'm sorry..." that's all he said.

"sorry? you mean you killed her on accident?" my voice falters and he hangs his head low. i suddenly lose my appetite.

"you haven't thought once that your actions are... disgusting?" i ask.

"love blinds us y/n. and you're clearly blind when it comes to the prince." a now visible smirk appears on his lips. "you don't think i know they're here?"

i immediately stumble back from my chair and stand up with weak legs.

"don't hurt them, please!" i beg him, tears blurring my vision.

"i don't know y/n... you're going to have to convince me." his voice filled with poison like a snake.

"what do you want me to do?"

"simple. stay away from them. if i so much see taehyung put his hands on my property again i won't hesitate to slit his throat myself." his voice hisses.

i sigh deeply and leave quickly to my bedroom again, slamming the door. what will happen tomorrow? the plan is basically ruined if jongsuk knows already. i guess it's up to me to save myself. i manage to calm and when i face problems i do the most logical thing, sleep it out.

the dream

i'm in a plain white room, no windows no doors, the walls looked like cushions. soundproof maybe? or maybe to contain mental patients from cracking their head open on the wall. i can feel the ground on my feet, it's also cushiony like pillows.

a figure appears in a cloud of smoke, red drips from her head to the ground. blood? blood is leaking out her throat and hair and heart. she looks unaffected and only has a pained smile, then in a flash of light wings appear on her back, she smiles in relief only to gasp in pain and stumble to the floor. my feet carry me wanting to help her, i reach for her hand but she looks up at me... i realize we look alike until i see she has freckles on her cheeks, a trait i don't have. she screams and gnarly nails dig into my outreaches hand. like a lion she latches onto my arm and pulls me down on the ground and hovers over me. i couldn't speak or move, she has me in a trance.

"why'd you leave me to die?" her voice croaks, it's filled with anger and fear.

i feel sweaty, uncomfortable, her blood soaking my clothes. she starts to chokes me, her eyes turning pitch black, i couldn't feel pain but i couldn't breathe either. i still can't move but when i manage to say, "i'm sorry".

the girl stops and crawls away. i inhale, gasping for air, my vision clears, i can move. i look at the girl and she's shaking, she's not bleeding anymore and no more wings, instead she looks like a broken angel. her dark brown eyes search mine, a painful expression is on her face.

"that's all i wanted to hear." she whispered so only i can hear.

then i woke up.

i sat up straight in my bed, cold sweat running across my forehead. i feel arms wrapped around my waist to try to lay me back down. it's jongsuk. he mumbles something i couldn't understand but i quickly shake him away and stumble to the bathroom to throw up. when i return he's putting on a shirt and looks at me concerned. even though he flashed his abs at me i managed to not get flustered.

"ready for school?" he asks.

i just nod and wait for him so i can change. he just chuckles.

"i'm going to watch you."

"what? have you lost your marbles?" i scoff.

i didn't really care, he's seen me naked when i was little anyways. jongsuk sits down on the bed and watches me like a pervert as i put on my uniform.

"you need new undergarments sweetie, it's too innocent what you have right now." he comments.

i know i just wear regular panties from target and sports bras but i just roll my eyes as i tie a bow around my neck. i remember the plan and i still wasn't ready to give up on it.

i made my way to jongsuk who's sitting down on the bed arrogantly, i straddle him as i put each leg on his side, my hands not touching him because in my hand behind my back i was clutching a knife...

"i'm sorry for disobeying you." i purr snaking one hand behind his neck to gently rub it. his breathing quickens.

i lean in more to whisper in his ear, "i'm surprised yet still impressed how you managed to hold yourself back all these years around me."

jongsuk's cheeks are red but i wasn't finished yet with my little script.

"just how much longer can you control yourself from touching me?" i ask huskily, impressed with my acting skills.

jongsuk growls and leans in to kiss me roughly his head tilting to the side so he can feel every inch of my lips. i smirk into the kiss, quickly raising the knife to slit his throat but he catches my wrists and does a move so the knife releases from my grip and makes a loud bang on the wooden floor. it's his turn to grin now as he throws me on the bed and hovers above me.

"you didn't think i knew what you were up to my love?" he stares at me and i feel disgusted at the position we're in. "you're making me feel all hot and bothered, are you ready to take the consequences?"

i try to shove him away but he's too strong and pins my arms down and starts to roughly kiss me again, i try to turn my head to side but he gathers both arms above my head and keeps them down by holding my wrists, his free hand now clutching my jaw to make me stop moving.

"you squirming like this under me y/n won't help you." he says coldly, latching his cold lips to my neck and licking the spots he sucks.

i couldn't take it anymore so i do the most logical thing, make him feel guilty. i begin to cry, it wasn't hard to do since i didn't want to be touched by him. the tears streamed down my face making my vision blurry and i was glad i didn't have to see his face for a moment. i feel him stop as i choke on my sobs. his weight pulls away from me slightly as he gathered my face in his hands, making me look into his eyes.

"i'm sorry." he whispers and gives me a kiss on the forehead, he gets off me and places a blanket over my shivering body.

what just happened? i thought to myself as he makes his way out of my bedroom.