(A/N Notes: A quick chapter this one was. You probably read that with Yoda's voice, anyways the next chapter, will be released someday in the future that I don't know when because I still need to write it)

It was another day at the Azur Lane port, and thus another day of endless paperwork. The commander was as always when he was not fucking around or running away from work, dealing with all the paperwork on his desk, and today he had the secretary ship of the week, Essex to help him

"... Commander, can I ask you something?"

"Hm? Sure, what do you want to ask me, Essex?"

"Are you human?"

"..."

"..."

The commander looked towards Essex in silence at her question, he remained quiet for long seconds before responding

"... Yes!"

"What was that pause for?"

"Nothing really"

Then the commander went to take a sip from his mug that had the words "Best 100% human commander of Azur Lane", but then he noticed that it was empty

"Ah! Essex, could you please pick a beverage for me?"

"Of course, commander!"

Essex then left the office to take a drink for the commander. After a short walk, she arrived at the cafeteria, which right now was empty because of the hour, then she went to one of the open bar fridges to grab a drink for the commander

"Huh? There's only Oxy-cola here"

"Ara, if it isn't Essex"

"Huh? New Jersey! What brings you here?"

"I came to have some ice cream, and what about you?"

"The commander asked me to bring a beverage to him, but there's only Oxy-Cola here"

"Ah! That. Just bring the Oxy-Cola to him"

"Eh? But isn't Oxy-Cola only for shipgirls?"

"Well, the commander is always drinking it, though"

"... Eh, but isn't he human?"

"... ... ... Yes, he is"

"Why the pause?"

"Nothing really, now if you excuse me, I'll take my leave, I promised to bring ice cream to Tico as well. See ya, Essex"

"Ah! Yes. See you, New Jersey"

After New Jersey left, Essex contemplated for a little longer whether to bring Oxy-cola for the commander, before she decided... to search a little more until she found a bottle of 100% apple juice to bring to the commander

"Sorry for the tardiness, commander! Here's your drink"

"Ah! Thanks, Essex. Apple juice? You could've just brought Oxy-Cola, but thanks anyway"

"...Thank you, commander" <It was really okay to bring him Oxy-Cola!?>

The commander continued doing his paperwork until the door to his office was opened with a bang by Allen M. Sumner

BANG

"Commander! We have serious problems!"

"Don't say it, what it was this time?"

"A crime has occurred in the port!"

"A crime you say?"

"Yes!"

"So my time has finally come"

The commander got up from his chair and walked around his desk as he made his way to the door

"Essex, come with me we crime to solve" *Puts on his aviator sunglasses*

And as the commander put his aviator sunglasses over his eyes, a voice shouting "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" could be heard, confusing Essex, and then shortly after the commander's desk exploded, completely taking Essex by surprise

*Guitar and other instruments SFX together with a montage of commander riding a boat and the eagle union shipgirls doing crime investigation stuff*

We don't get fooled again~ Don't get fooled again!~No! No!~

Some minutes later

The commander and Essex had arrived at the crime scene, the Northern Parliament girls were securing the perimeter as they wore their police costumes. The two walked inside the crime area and began their investigation

"So where's our victim, Shangri-La?"

"Over there commander"

"I see"

The commander walked towards the victim, as Essex followed after him

"Wow! This is pretty bad"

That was all the commander could say as he saw who the victim was...

"My katana... Where's my katana?..."

It was Hakuryuu, as she remained in a fetal position as she cried because she didn't have her katana with her. Having seen the victim, the commander returned to where Shangri-La was

"So what evidence do we have of the crime?"

"... None"

"I see, do we have any witnesses?"

"Yes, we have a few"

"Good bring me to them"

"Okay"

The commander and Essex were then taken to a building nearby, and then they began interrogating the witnesses

"So... Chikuma do you have any clues of who might have stolen Hakuryuu's katana?"

"Maybe I do, but that will come with a price, can you even afford it?"

"A date with me"

"I only have these two photos"

Chikuma showed one photo of Hakuryuu walking and another photo of Hakuryuu slightly ahead of her previous position, but she was now on the floor in a fetal position as she cried

"I see, you can go"

"Thanks! I look forward to our date"

"Sure, sure. Alright! Next!"

"Hm? Commander?"

"What is it, Essex?"

"Are you sure you're doing a proper investigation?"

"Of course, I am"

The commander said so as he held a notepad in his hands. Then the next witness to enter was Shimakaze

"Alright, Shimakaze... Did you see anything?"

"N-no! I didn't! But I-"

"Alright, you can go"

" "Eh?" "

"Didn't you hear me? You can go"

"A-are you sure about that? W-what if I'm the criminal?"

"You're Hakuryuu's friend, are you not? Why would you even steal it from her?"

"... You're right! Then see ya another, commander!"

And then Shimakaze left

"Commander... Are you sure you know what you're doing?"

"Of course, I know. Bring the next witness!"

And then, it was Suruga's turn to be interrogated

"..."

She stayed quiet as the commander stared right at her soul, while Essex kept alternating her gaze between the commander and Suruga with a confused expression

*Intense glare intensifies*

"..."

Suruga began to heavily sweat, as the commander just menacingly stared at her in silence, and then after he finished his tic tac toe game he was doing in his notepad, he finally said something to her

"You can go"

Hearing that Suruga got up and respectfully bowed before  she quickly made her way out of there

"Alright, we interrogated all the witnesses, now let's move to the other forensic stuff!"

"O-okay!"

The commander and Essex left the building, and then they entered a car and made their way to the forensic laboratory of the port. After going for about 30 minutes, the commander suddenly stopped the car

"What happened, commander!?"

"... If forgot..."

"Forgot what!?"

"... That we don't have a forensic laboratory"

"... Eh?"

"Alright, let's go back"

The commander made a turn and went back to the crime scene. By the time they returned it was almost an hour for the commander's expedient to finish

"Alright, Essex. It's time for us to finish this case"

"... How? We don't have any lead to the culprit, commander"

"That's obvious, my dear Essex... That's because there was never a culprit"

"*Gasp*! H-How do you know that, Commander!?"

"That's because... I had Hakuryuu's Katana ever since we were halfway here"

"... Huh?"

"It was fallen near the bushes, so she definitely just dropped it by accident as she was walking over there, and when she noticed she just became like that"

"T-then why didn't you return to her earlier?"

"... That's because... I needed to waste enough time until it was the hour for my expedient to end"

"..."

The commander then approached Hakuryuu and returned her katana, which brought her back to her usual confident self, while the commander made his way to the cafeteria to have dinner. As for Essex, she just stood there with empty eyes and an equally empty smile. Then she felt someone touch her on the shoulder, and when she turned she saw it was Belfast

"...Belfast-san?"

"Essex..."

"Y-yes?"

"You'll get used to the Commander's antics in no time, trust me we all get used to it"

"... I see..."

Essex then looked up at the setting sky and said in her mind

"..." <Enterprise-senpai... Please come back soon> *Crying from desperation*