Work Text:

"Clive says Fernand needs some social practice, so he's here today."

That was the line that started this whole day as a certain mage dragged in a blond male older than him on a child leash. All that could be heard was the over whelming groans of Helen, Mary and Frank, among other whispers between the other parents.

"You best not be talking shit about Lukas. I'm the only one who can do that." The blond muttered.

"You know your supposed to be on your best behavior." Berkut glared.

"I'm still getting out to eat no matter what you say."

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"Would you like a cookie?" Mary asked, trying to fake her happiness.

"Sure, why not?" Fernand asked as he took a cookie. "At least they aren't Linda's nasty ass gluten squares." After he bit into the cookie, he started to choke and vomited into the trash can next to him. "These cookies are horse shit!" He spat out. "Someone get me some Bleach or Tide Pods!"
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"Is he your son?" A member of the pta asked.

"No, that thing's an animal." Helen said as she reached her hand out in an attempt to tug at the blond's ascot as he was busy helping Anthony with his math homework. Once the blond caught wind of her hand out, his head snapped toward her faster than Reinhardt or Berkut could grab the leash.
"Touch me and I will be a fucking animal towards you and bite your fingers off." He snapped before turning to Anthony, a lot more cooled off then he was with Helen. "Don't use that type of language ok? Once you turn 18 it'll be fine."
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"Honestly, we should ban these Emblian freaks from the school, they're freaking out the kids and making them believe in witchcraft." David, the male equivalent to Linda muttered to the other parents.

"FiGHT ME DAVID! HAIL DUMA!" Fernand shouted from across the room, making Reinhardt and Berkut hide in jacket town.
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"Sorry I'm late guys! I had to convince the principal to let me still run the pta." Linda said as she walked in with her infamous lemon squares.

"Oh I have heard tons of shit about you Linda." The blond growled before charging towards Linda.

"Nope. Fuck this shit we're out." Berkut muttered. "Let's grab Anthony and leave before he does any damage."
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"Why did you do that Fernand?" Clive sighed, understanding what happened at the meeting.

"To be honest, I think Linda has a problem." The other male replied with Taco Bell in his Mouth.

Chori- Did I write Fernand right?