10 years ago I met my one true match, literally. While at a convention for pyromaniacs I stipped over a mysterious object, but when I looked back to see what it was I realized it was the leg of the most beautiful girl in the world. I rushed over to her to apologize and see if she was okay and the only words she could manage to say were "Oh my god! You are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen." she then proceeded to hand me her phone and mumble something. The only word I heard was number so I put my number into her phone. This was the start of the relationship that changed me forever. Now 10 years later I plan to murder her in the most suitable way, arson. As I carefully lace the car with gasoline I think of what I will say to her when we both reach hell. When she gets home from work she tells me she has a surprise to show me. I follow her into the house... BANG!