Did you ever get the feeling of the world shutting down in your head? Something like, autumn, but late autumn, when the trees are bare and the ground is frozen. If you didn't, then I hope you never will. It's not a necessarily bad feeling, but its not good either. Its something that is just there, having zero effect on your actions, while having a giant effect on your mind? Today, I will tell you a story. But this isn't your regular story, don't expect a happy ending.

The princess of the Lily

There was once a princess in a beautiful green country. She had an older brother and a younger sister who she loved dearly. Her name was Lumina.

Lumina was a plant and an animal lover, owning a garden and a variety of animals herself. She liked to draw and write as well, but what she liked most, was being a child. She could run, play with her mother's make-up, scaring sheep, and be wild all she likes.

But then, everything changed, with her 15th birthday. And by everything, I mean her parents. Their gazes hardened. Her smiling guitar playing father was replaced by a cold teacher with burning words. He started critisizing everything about her. Her behaviour, her outfits, her teaching methods. He became cold and calculated.

Her warm and cuddly mother was replaced by a manipulating demon. She commanded Lumina like a puppetmaster would to a puppet. She was told what to wear, what to eat, what to believe, how to behave, where to be at what time, what to think. But, Lumina never understood. Her brother wasn't treated that way. Neither was her older cousins, Leah and Carlito. Why was she treated so harshly?

But, everytime she would ask, she would get the same reply:
"Stop being so childish."

She still didn't get it. How can a child be childish? She continued to ask that, untill her mother snapped. She slapped Lumina hard, and yelled:
" You are not a child! You are becoming an adult, so act like one!"

An adult? But she was almost 16 at that time. She couldn't be an adult, right? As the days passed, Lumina got more and more sadder. Does this mean being an adult? Following the crowd, aimlessly? Not laughing at corny jokes, running through the fields, caring for animals, and singing out of tune? Why does she have to learn things she will never understand, or need?

Is this really what adulthood means? To live in bitterness and seriousness because someone else is better then you? Or because you are burdened to be. As the months passed, Lumina got colder and colder, her light fading in the grey clouds.

She couldn't play anymore, only watch her sister play. She couldn't see her little garden, or animal friends anymore. She had 'more important things to do'. She forgot the feeling of grass underneath her feet. She forgot the wind in her hair. She can't experience sunsets anymore, because she has to study. How to be an adult.

What has become of her life? She lived for nothing. Her routine was the same. School-home-studying. Where did all the children go? All the roaring fields? All the cute kittens and ladybugs flying around? She didn't know, and with time, she forgot.

That is, untill one faithful day, a day she still remembers to this day. She was on her bed, studying as usual. She heard a faint knock on her door, and her sister's head peeked through. Her sister ran into her arms, with a fresh slap mark on her cheek. She was crying and sniffling. After a while, Lumina asked:

"Annie? What's wrong?"
"M-mother slapped me, and told me to grow up." She replied, her face in Lumina's dress. She lifted her brown eyes up, and asked:
" Why would mommy hurt me like that? Why do we have to grow up?"

Lumina didn't know what to say, but then she looked outside, and saw a blooming lily.

"Annie... My sweet little Annie. Mother wants us to grow up, so we could become beautiful lilies. We can't be daisies forever."

Annie hiccuped and said:
"But, I don't want to grow up. It will make me sad and alone."

"Why would you think that?"

Annie got free from Lumina's hug, and yelled:
"Because you are! You never play with me anymore, you never go outside, you don't even draw anymore! It's like you are dead, big sister! Because you had to grow up! I don't want to grow up, I don't want to be like you!" And she stormed out of the room.

Then, it dawned on Lumina. Her sister was always there, watching as Lumina got broken. She saw it all. All of Lumina's sad faces, all of her new frowns, she watched her eyes getting colder. She watched her own sister die, and getting replaced by a monster.

And now, its her sister's turn, and she is scared. She scared of becoming... Her older sister. Lumina looked down at her feet. She tried to be an adult, she tried not to cry, but her sister's words echoed in her mind. Why? Soon, she burst into tears, and said through weeps:

"Who am I anymore?!"

And she was left to cry, in her own bitterness and loneliness.

THE END.