As you can see, I'm about to tell you one of my overly shitty life stories, your decision if ya wanna read or if you don't. And all of these will be rated PG-13 for language, and occasionally other things.

     But let's get on with it! Shall we?

     So you know its the Halloween of 2016, and me and my sister fucking love that holiday. Now one thing you may not know about my sister, is that she gets scared very easily.

     You may be thinking, 'sure, yeah! I know people like that.' But no, my sister takes being scared to a whole other level. First I'll list the slightly reasonable:

     Every time a horror ad comes on, she's gonna flip. Not even kidding, she'll find the nearest blanket or pillow, hide her face, and scream her ass off. A lot of people are scared of things like this so I let it slide.

     Five nights at Freddy's, legendary game and my second most loved, next to Undertale. Thing is about my sister, she'll freak out if somebody mentions it. Like you can talk about fnaf and she'll go bizerk.

     And as for a few unreasonables:

     Do any of you remember the Nanny Mc.Phee movies? She was like this crazy witch baby sitter who had this odd wart? Now my sis is afraid of her. I found it somewhat OK until I found out it was just because of the fucking wart. Like, what?!! Your scared of a what???

     She was also scared of the Agatha girl from Disney's Jessie. Funny story: she's a baby sitter and... She has a wart!!? Is it just something about baby sitters with warts she's freaking out about???

    Last on the list and we'll get to the story:

     Human eyes. Legit. Just normal eyes. She say that after like 5, when it begins to get even a little dark she'll be overly scared of eyes. Human eyes, animal eyes, I just think Count Olaf scarred her for life.

     Now that you kind of have it in mind that my sister is scared, you could almost feel my excitement. That night was sure to make her crazy, and ohhhhh boy! It was gonna be great.

    So yeah, were all dressed up in costumes, my sister was a really tacky dollar store pirate, and I was a Serial killer. No not a Serial killer, a CEREAL killer. I had taped mini cereal boxes all over me and stuck little plastic knifes in them. It was uncomfortable but I didn't care, everyone got a kick out of it.

        So the night was going great, we've knocked out several houses and have a shit ton of candy. So were at our last few houses and the best thing happens.

     So we walk up to this one house, our second to last, and it was perfect. Undecorated and unsuspecting. So we walk up their driveway and I hear the loudest, girliest, and most irritating scream from my sister.

     I whip around and she was out. She practically dove Inside the car, it was great. But the best part is, as she was running I was just singing in my mind, fuck this shit I'm out... It was a beautiful coincidence.

     Anyways I look at them, confused as fuck. And they begin pointing to something and I still haven't noticed anything. And then I hear my mom and sister screaming,

"BEHIND THE TREE!!!"

     And so I look behind the tree...

There was a fucking man with a fucking mask. You ever seen those white ghoul masks? Yeah? So he was wearing that,

     But it was amazing because he wasn't in full costume, he was like this overweight guy with dad clothes and a mask. I swear I just began laughing on the spot. So you know, he's being all spoopy behind the tree and I say,

    "Ah! That's some good scaring you do there," and I point a couple finger guns at him. And then he points finger guns at me. And I just laugh. So he continues being a creep and after I minute, I pull out my fists and stand in a boxing stance. "You wanna go??"

     So he jumps out behind the tree and gets in a boxing stance. My mom and my sister were freaking out, so after hearing another shrill shreak he takes off his mask like,

     "Hey hey! I'm sorry about that," he chuckles, "just having a little fun! Don't worry I'm not gonna scare ya any more." And he gives us candy and I'm just like, yes! A story to tell, but that's not all.

     So we go to the next house and we walk the drive way just to hear another scream. I just smirk to myself and say, "what is it now?"

     We turn around and the same guy has put on his mask and followed us to the next house! He was like behind a car and being a creep again, and I just laugh my ass off. So I pull out my fist and say, "C'mere man."

    He begins running towards me in a rather scary manner, and stops right in front of me just to give me a little fist bump.

    So we go home and I think l to myself, yes! An even better story to tell!

    Hah.

    But that's not all.

   So were home and I whip around pointing at the door. "Its the guy with the white mask!!!" I said, sounding alarmed. My sister starts crying, whilst the rest of us start laughing. The guy wasn't there, but Jesus did I ever scare her?

       My punishment: I was beaten with a giant pixie stick.

     But hey, it was all worth it. Her biggest fear is still
The front door, and that same street. And I, still, have no regrets.