Well, I'm bored and sad. First off I'm at my grandma's house right now, and just because my phone died I missed a party that I wanted to go to. Second, my aunts and cousin (who is my Bff) went to the mall but since I'm a bit anti-social I decided not to go... I regret that mistake very much. Every time I miss something people always have so much fun and have a story to tell, and yet I stay here being my anti-social and depressed self. I try to go out and have fun as much as I can but it always ends up being a bit bland, if you ever really REALLY know me you would know under my bubbly and goofy disguise I'm actually lonely and sad. Well, lets be real here who isn't a bit lonely. I choose to be lonely because I can't decide between yes or no. It also doesn't help that I'm a doormat, I can't even say no when people ask for my lunch money! No matter how hard I try I'm always sad and depressed, I try to hide it by acting goofy and childish but that'll never be me. No one and I mean no one knows the REAL me, even when I'm at my saddest I just smile and say I'm fine and the worst part is people actually believe me. I just want one person, one person that truly knows me. That one person that actually knows that I'm sad without me having to tell them.... but here I am stuck telling you guys how I feel through writing. Why am I hiding my emotions? I don't really know, I want to be comforted but at the same time left alone. What do I do? I hear so many stories on how people always find someone that really knows them and that one person helps them get out of that hole called depression. What about me? Will I be able to have that one person? For now I don't know and I'm falling deeper and deeper into that rabbit hole called depression. If you think this is all fake and I'm just doing this for attention, well you can believe what you want. This is how I feel and I'm not stopping you from thinking what you want. Well, I'm pretty sad I guess I'll just write a story after this, because that is how I cope I write stories that tell my emotions. Anyways, bye guys.