Konstantin Ivanov

"It iz done, Sir.." Luka's highly skilled fingers finally cease blazing over the keyboard before he looks up from the computer with a prideful smirk of satisfaction.. To work off my excess tension, I pace back and forth across the floor of my office, puffing on a cigarette and seething over the finer details of the whole night.. Again and again, I can't bear to stop myself from imagining every worst case scenario, past, present and future..

The past has shown me how easy it is to lose everything I care about..
The present is a constant reminder of the unpredictability of each and every day..
The future, as ever, remains an unforseeable abyss into which we fall endlessly..

What exactly had Diago been hoping to achieve by visiting Lucky in the dead of night? Part of me suspects his intention was to frighten her, or to gain her favour by telling her lies about the fixations of her curious mind.. Another, darker part of me suspects he was there to do far worse..
Whoever it is he was working for, I can't risk them discovering Lucky's obsession with the Abigail Brightly case..

Why is it that my sunshine refuses to concede to the mystery of this girl's death?
People die every day, it is the one certainty of living, yet for some infuriating reason, Lucky is relentless in her persuit of answers, she is like the proverbial dog with a bone..

What will come of us if our paths continue to dissect? I want to believe I have what it takes to protect and provide for her.. But the simple truth is that there are threats to our happiness around each and every corner..

Her life has been compromised by unknown Shadow Loop sickos and mine remains dictated by The Red Devil himself.. And to add more fuel to the fire, I am sure Paxton will continue to judge and interfere from the sidelines as he is well known to do..

My options have become limited and my objectives have become clear.. There is only one way I can think to give Lucky cause to leave the mystery of the young lady's death alone and that is to find the killer myself and put a bullet between his eyes..

The murderer is probably some Meksikanskiy mudak who is already on The Pakhan's hit list.. So all I have to do is convince Nika to reveal to me the identity of this 'Big Digs'.. A task I am sure that is easier said than done.. Nika is a heartless dog, a liar, a perversion of a man.. It is no secret among the brotherhood ranks that his loyalty is not to the Bratva, but rather to himself.. He would spill any blood, harm any innocence, punish any treason..

But I am already aware there are seeds of discontent that sprout among his soldiers.. More and more I am beginning to believe I must cultivate those saplings, foster their spread and use that disharmony to achieve the inevitable.. That is the only way to prevent the very worst of my nightmares from coming to fruition..

There is no longer a way out, no escape.. There will be no retirement for me, no quiet life in the mountains.. Nyet, my only option now is to wade deeper into the organisation and climb higher in rank.. To seize control and capture the power that would allow me to protect my Solnyshko..

I am going to do what I should have done back in Moscow all those years ago after I cut the throat of Oska Romanov.. I am going to kill the Pakhan, and I am going to take his place..

I have never been a man in want of power, I had always been content to tow the line and keep to myself, but destiny has a funny way of pushing me into places I never wanted to be..

"You are certain? There can be no mistake, Luka.. I will hold personally you accountable if anything happenz to Mizz O'Cléirigh.." I snap hashly, put on edge by the idea of a single error risking the bliss I have finally found..

"Absolyutno.." Luka nods, reaching for the pack of cigarettes on the desk to serve himself a reward.. "I have not seen you thiz way before, Koba-- You appear to have much-- affection for thiz girl.. It iz not like you to invest such interest.."

"You do not fucking know what iz like me, Luka-- but know thiz-- I am about to change the Darkport Zakone forever.. Kalashnik muzt die if we wish to see progress.. I muzt have your loyalty for what iz to come, or you may leave now.."

Luka rises slowly to his feet.. "I would follow you to the grave and beyond, Komandir.. You know thiz."

"I will not forget it, Luka.." I retrieve the dead man's phone from my pocket to place it on the desk beside him.. "Now, I want to know evurything about thiz man.."

Luka inspects the cell but doesn't turn it on.. "If you did tell me what all thiz waz about, what exactly I am looking for, I could be of much more use to you, Kosya.."

"I must know his associates.. One in particular is ov' interest to me.. The one they call 'Ze Big Digs.."

"Understood, Sir."

"Ah, I also need for you to make transfer to Yuri, four-hundred-thousand.. Two tonight, two on my word.."

"Da, I will take care ov' it.."

....

I make my way downstairs and through the back room, pushing through the doors that lead back out to the casino floor.. Glancing down the length of the bar, an unpleasant wash of worry strikes me when I see that the place where Lucky had been sitting is empty..
But then I hear it.. The sweetest melody, like a joyous songbird, her laugh trickles through the air and I turn towards the roulette table to see her bouncing her seat in excitement.. Beside her sits Stori Petrovich, my banker and debt collector.. A man known on the street by the name of 'The Psycho'..

I shake my head at his brazen attempt to press my woman for information.. He always was a nosey know it all..

I cross the floor, eyeing up their interactions as I approach.. The way his hand settles over hers on the table top, the way she smiles sunbeams back at him and for a moment I pause..

Those old familiar feelings of jealousy and impulses toward violence soon give way to the doubt that begins to gnaw at me..
Perhaps she really would be happier without me..

Flashes of Ariana's vision deceive me and I remember the cold feeling of the day I did have to identify her body after it was pulled from the river..

The ghastly ashen-white of her skin..
Her frozen, waterlogged flesh..
The vacant emptiness of her eyes..

I can not bare to recall the anguish of that day.. I could never gaze upon Lucky beneath those fluorescent mourge lights..

Fuck!
No!
Stop!

Forcing myself forward I come to a stop behind her chair as Stori turns to see me, a broad grin on his stupid face.. "Kostya! You did not tell uz your girlfriend waz such a beautiful charm!"

Lucky jumps to her feet, whirling around to catch me by the arm, a wired and adrenalised energy buzzing through her.. "BEAR! I JUST WON--hiccp!-- FIFTY-THOUSAND DOLLARS!"

"Ah, vury good my little Leprekon, how Lucky you are.." I glance over her shoulder to see the messy stack of chips before her place and several empty shot glasses..

She is adorably drunk, swaying in her sneakers, a dreamy smile in her face as she leans against me.. "Mmh-- you're friends are niiice.."

"They are not.." I chuckle as I look to Stori who winks back at me..

In an irritated warning motion I drag a finger over my throat, threatening to slit his neck open if he had behaved inappropriately in the slightest..
He holds up his hands in deferral, bowing his head.. "I meant only to keep the beautiful woman company while she did wait, Kostya.."

"Stori was just being friendly, Bear.. Don't be mad at him.." Lucky draws back in my arms, petting down my sides before reaching into my pocket to find the pack of cigarettes kept in there.. "I had fun!"

"I am pleazed, Solnyshko.." A little of the tension leaves my shoulders as my suspicions ebb away and she begins digging through my pockets again in search of my matchbook..

"Can we go--hiccp--outside? It's too bloody hot in here!" She unbuttons her jacket and begins shrugging off her fluffy fur coat but I quickly grab onto her collar to keep her covered, not wanting the lecherous eyes in this room to see her skin or the small cropped shirt she wears beneath..

Some of the men here are harmless, though many of them are not..

"Da.. We go.. Petrovich will open your account.." Stori nods in understanding as he rakes her chips back into his pile..

"Thanks Storiiiiii!" Lucky coos before she hooks her arm through the crook of my elbow for balance and waves goodbye to the table with a cheery cry.. "Buh-byee you guys!"

"You drink much, Darling.." I hum as we make out way back towards the front door.. "You muzt take caution around Stori, he would like to have you for himself."

"Oh? Are you jealous, Big Bear?" She taunts, unaware of just how envious I can be.

"Da.. Give me cause and I will kill him, Malishka.." A sour taste forms in my mouth at the very idea of Stori stealing anything from me..
I have seen him successful enough with finance that he would be more than capable of embezzling my funds, and I have seen him charm the finest of beauties into bed..

I speak no lie when I warn Lucky that I would destroy him if he were ever to make a pass at her. I would kill any man who dared just to look at her as if she were attainable.

"Ha-ha, very funny--" Her eyes widen in worry and her mouth opens slowly as she realises that I am not making a joke.. "Wait-- Are you seriously angry? Please don't be mad at me--"

"I am not what you call 'mad', Malishka, I am only telling to you the truth ov' who I am." I pull open the door for her and we step out into the beautiful breeze, snowflakes drifting down through the cool night air.. "I could never be angry with you.."

"But that's not true.. You were mad at me that morning.. After I gave you the pictures.." She eyes me with apprehension as we stop by the entry and I produce the matchbook from my pocket, wedging a cigarette between my lips before striking a flame that we share to light our smokes.. "Did you look at them?"

"Da.. I did.." I grumble, flicking the matchstick to the snow covered ground where it hisses as the ice douses the tiny flame..

Lucky takes a slow, sexy draw of her cigarette, pouting her impossibly irresistible pink lips as she presses the subject.. "And?"

"And what?" I shrug, feigning misunderstanding that does nothing to convince her that I don't know what she is asking..

I do know.. I know that she wants to dig deep beneath my doubts to find the hint of redemption..

The truth is that the longer I stared at those pictures, the more clarity I gained..
I realise now that I could never have saved Arina, because she did not want to be saved..

The weight of life itself had crushed her, day by day, each tragedy flowing into the next.. She lived through an unbearable heaviness and try as I did to carry that responsibility, I could not give her life meaning.. Only Ivar could do that, he had been the light leading both of us through the murky misery..

But the boy was born with a death sentence, fragile and so very sick.. The progeria caused him so much pain, so much suffering..

Arina did everything she could, she fought hard, I know she did.. But no mother should be forced to watch her child die.. It is a fate more cruel than death itself..

I understand why Arina did what she did, I forgive her.. But I did not leave my family for selfish reasons, I never wanted to go to war, I never wanted to wear that uniform or carry a rifle.. Just as Ivar's condition had been one of fate, so had the course of my life..

Today must be the day I finally forgive myself.. To lay to rest those ghosts that have kept me company for so long..

Today, I let go of what never was and cherish the memories of what I did once have..

"What did you feel?" Lucky probes gently, exhaling a swirling stream of steam and smoke as she laces her fingers through mine to squeeze my hand..

I shift uncomfortably, taking a slow drag of my cigarette to stall for an answer.. "I do not know.."

Lucky rolls her pretty eyes and tugs on my hand, not allowing me to guard my feelings. "Liar.."

"Tsk!" I scoff with a sharp smirk.. "You do never give up.."

'No.." She shakes her head.. "I really don't.."

Breathing a reluctant huff I fold my arm around her waist to pull her closer, close enough to smell her sugary scent.. "I did feel sadness, Malishka.. There waz pain in my chest and sickness in my stomach.. It did hurt.."

"Oh, Bear.." She peers up at me with crystal tears brimming in her beautiful eyes.. "It kills me to think of you in pain.."

Reaching up I brush the sunshine strands away from her sweet face with the backs of my knuckles, appraising every inch of her perfection with a low rasp.. "I did also feel something else--"

"You did?" Lucky bats her lashes fast as flakes of snow pepper her rosy cheeks.. "What?"

"I did feel something peaceful.. A road 'zat reaches its end can no longer be travelled.." I sigh in relief.. "That life is over, Lucky.. Now, I have a new one.. I will not make 'ze same mistakez.."

"Oh.." She chews her plump bottom lip with a trembling breath as I drag a thumb across her jawline, lifting her gaze to mine.. "So--um-- That thing you said-- about us wanting different things.. D'you still feel that way?"

"Nyet, Solnyshko.." I smile as my fingers trail through the silky soft of her golden curls to wind around the back of her neck.. "I want evurything it iz you want.."

I lean down to kiss her soft lips, feeling the clench of her fingers as she clings to the collar of my jacket.. She tastes delicious, like vodka and honey and the soft purr of satisfaction she moans into my mouth is something I could never get enough of..

"And do you want it soon?" She blinks hopefully when we finally break apart for breath.. "I mean-- I would wait forever for you, but I've waited so long already and I just need to know we are in this together.."

I grin at her impatience.. She really is in such a hurry to live, to experience all there is and her lust for life is infectious.. "Da, Moya Lyubov', vury soon.."

We fall into a comfortable embrace and an extended silence, neither of us saying the words but both of us basking in the beautiful moment, broken only when a violent shiver shakes through her, the cold finally getting into her bones..

"Come.. We go home now--" I begin to lead her back down the sidewalk towards the Porsche when she pulls against my arm to stop me with an eager squeal of joy..

"Wait, no!" She lifts a delicate hand to point directly across the street.. "Ooh, Bear, I wanna go in there! Pleeeeeeease!"

I can't contain the rumble of laughter that rises up in my belly as I follow the direction of her gaze to see the Illuminated triple-X sign that flashes in neon pink.. "Bože Moy!"