There were so many trees around her, yet she found it hard to breathe. Maybe it was the emptiness crushing her lungs. Maybe it was the blankness in the way she felt.

Or maybe it was the cigarette in her mouth.

Either way, she felt she had to choke back the oxygen the oaks had given to her. It didn't help that she was sitting on rock-hard concrete—the edge of a large abandoned pool behind Seoul National University. It wasn't even important really, she just enjoyed swinging her legs over the edge as she watched the clouds roll above the trees.

It was pretty quiet there usually. The birds were asleep in the shade respectively at the time she stopped by, and the breeze which wafted over her clothes was like heaven in a nutshell. This place, where splurges of grass tickled her ears and her eyes reflected the sky, she came to be alone; it was the perfect place to do just that. The only downside was when there were tourists or kids or—them.

They almost always interrupted her alone time. There were at least six of them if not more, and whenever she heard their shrewd laughs and yells coming up the mountain, she booked it.

Although, sometimes, she didn't leave. Sometimes she sat in the bushes out of sight and just listened to them giggle and scream and have fun. By the way they sounded, she guessed they were high schoolers. They were loud enough to be, for sure. She'd never had the courage to sneak a glance at them, but she didn't need to.

Something about the good times they had and how much they enjoyed each other's company made her feel a little bit less empty inside.

But she would never admit that.

"Hey."

She almost jumped out of her skin until she realized it was just Iseul who lowered herself into the empty pool from the other side and strolled over to her.

She only nodded while blowing out a puff of smoke as the young girl crawled up to sit next to her. Iseul waved her hand in front of her face, disgusted at the smell which permeated from the lit end. She knew she shouldn't be influencing someone younger, especially a minor, but she couldn't bring herself to care as she took another deep breath and enjoyed her surroundings. Iseul would have to get used to it. It was life.

"Why do you always come here?"

"Be alone." She shrugged before taking a drag. "Smoke a cig."

"Those are so bad for you, Vic..."

Victoria blew out with a smile. "Smoking is bad for you," she mocked. "If only I gave a shit." Iseul only sighed. "The fuck are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in school?" she mumbled around the rolled up paper.

"Skipped."

Victoria smirked.

"Why aren't you at work?" Iseul asked with a childlike innocence she always carried.

"Called in sick."

The thing was, Victoria loved her job. She loved teaching kids about the Korean war and gaining independence from the Japanese during World War II. She loved working in sarcastic comments and roasting the ones who didn't pay attention.

If any of the other teachers saw that, she'd be fired pretty quickly. Luckily, the kids kept talk to themselves. If they enjoyed her enough to keep her, then they would. It was all fate.

She called in sick primarily because of him. He thought that just because he was a pretty boy, he could get anything he wanted. It was true, but she hated it. And she hated him.

"So I guess we both needed a day off." Victoria only nodded, but as Iseul stared at the small butterfly which fluttered over her head and landed on a plump yellow daisy that had sprung up from the cracks between the concrete, she asked, "Have you seen those boys around?"

"Nope. Thank God." Victoria crushed the butt of the cigarette on the concrete before reaching into her purse for another. "I'm tired of them ruining my solace," she lied. It actually was a bit disappointing that they hadn't shown up for the past few days. It was a Thursday, and she had spent all week bickering with Jin. She needed a break from him. Just a small one.

She'd hoped they would come so she could sit and imagine she had friendships like that. That she was still a kid like that. But they didn't come that week.

"Why haven't you talked to them?" Iseul asked, eyes round with innocence.

Victoria grabbed her lighter that sat next to her and lit the smoke. "I come here to be alone, Iseul, not make friends with the Backstreet Boys."

She laughed lightly. "Well, I think it would be fun...meeting strange boys out in the wilderness...sounds like a drama, right?"

"Grow up, Iseul," she snapped after blowing out. "This isn't Sesame Street."

Iseul was silent at the sudden shift in Victoria's tone. She was liable to get irritated sometimes, but Iseul never knew what to do when she did. "Have you ever seen them?"

"Who? The Jonas Brothers? Yeah, I hide in the bushes and giggle like a schoolgirl. You should join me sometime."

Iseul rolled her eyes. "Come on! I'm serious..." Her eyes shifted to the large oak behind them. "Why not watch from, say...the top of that tree?"

"Why would I do that?"

Iseul smiled. "Scared?"

"No." Victoria sighed deeply, the one word question reminding her of Jin's pompous confidence.

Sure, he annoyed the shit out of her. She dreamed about him getting hit by a car. But there was no denying his kindness. When he wasn't fighting with her, he was very upbeat. Very fun-loving. There was something about that she liked. Maybe that's why she never hesitated to get into it with him. She liked him, but she hated him.

"You wouldn't climb it, though."

That pulled Victoria right out of her thoughts. With a flicker of defiance in her eyes, she stood and dropped the butt to the floor before stepping on it. "Bet."

She approached the tree with determination and stuck one foot on a ridge while holding onto the bark with her arms.

"I was kidding," Iseul chuckled as she watched from rim.

"I wasn't."

Victoria climbed slowly, making sure her footing was okay. She only clawed her way to the first branch where she sat, at least fifteen feet from the ground.

Iseul gazed up at her, blocking the afternoon sun from her eyes with one hand. "Good job. I wouldn't have done it."

"Cause you're afraid of heights."

Her young eyes glanced at the sunkissed tree one more time before turning back to face the pool. "Yeah..."

Dropping Iseul off at home had taken up almost all of the gas left in her beat-up Honda Civic. Victoria knew she should have filled it up sooner, but she couldn't muster the motivation. But she knew it was about time. And besides, she hadn't seen her friend who worked there for a while.

He was only a year younger than her, but she figured he must be in college or something by the way he articulated himself. He was such an intelligent kid that even with a masters in Education she felt ignorant next to him.

She pulled up next to the pump and waited for him to fill up her tank. The gas station was empty as usual, the only sound being crickets that peeped in unison with the twinkling stars above.

It had been almost five minutes of nothing. No smiling pink-haired genius pushed out of the store. Nobody went in or out. It was beginning to worry her.

Gingerly, Victoria got out of her car and walked around to the storefront. The lights overhead flickered and a blue glow shone through the store windows eerily. The concrete seemed much too cool in contrast to the humid spring season approaching. It almost seeped through her boots like roots of a tree refusing to let go.

She pushed the door open to find Namjoon fast asleep in an office chair, his feet propped up on the glass counter that encased many confections.

With an amused sigh, she shoved his feet off the counter. Before they even hit the ground, he woke with a start, eyes shooting open in alarm. He looked around for a moment, disoriented at the rude awakening.

The moment his gaze fell upon her, he let out a hearty laugh.

"Victoria!"

He stood immediately before walking around to the other side where she stood to give her a hug.

She smiled, accepting his gesture. "It's been a while, Namjoon."

"Yeah." He pulled away. "I thought you ran out of gas a few weeks ago."

She shrugged, turning toward the door to go outside again. "I probably did."

Victoria leaned against her car door while he stuck the nozzle in her car. "What have you been up to lately?"

He shrugged while lighting the butt in his mouth. At the sight of one, she reached into her purse to get one herself. "Not much. Just been—need a light?" She nodded and leaned over to let him flick the lighter on under her own cigarette, noticing the familiar tattoo on the side of his wrist that read B0612+RMS. "Just been working a lot. Things haven't been too climactic."

"How about that friend of yours?" she asked after blowing out. "Still tagging his life away?"

Namjoon shrugged again while taking a drag. "Yeah, but he's got a lot of problems." It would have seemed strange for an outsider to hear him share personal information about his friend with Victoria, who was virtually a stranger, but he didn't feel like it was wrong. Being open with her felt natural. "You know, with his dad and all."

"We all have problems..." A breeze blew through the structure, tangling her hair and slapping his tan face with its chill. "I just hope he grows out of it." When he didn't say anything, she continued. "'Cause he's still young, right? Younger than you?"

He nodded. "Only by a year, but yeah." Smoke drifted out of his open mouth. "Honestly, I think all of my friends have some growing up to do."

"And you don't?" she snorted.

He smiled. "Are you implying that I'm immature?"

"I'm not implying, Namjoon." He removed the nozzle as she spoke. "I'm stating."
    A hand clutched his chest dramatically while the other accepted the bills she held out to him. "I'm hurt."

"I'll see you around," she said with a laugh before getting into her car.

His hand patted the hood twice. "See ya, Victoria."

____________

Her fingers tapped the empty mug in her hand as she waited in the line to use the coffee machine. It wasn't always busy like this, but it was the last day of school before break. Teachers and secretaries and temps and pretty much every employee got there bright and early. She was relieved that she had a week off, but it irked her that everyone was crowding in on the coffee that was usually exclusively used by her and a few other teachers at that time of day.

The coffee was the only thing keeping her from ripping her hair out while she couldn't smoke at school. And these animals had the audacity to deprive her of that? It made her eye twitch.

"You look very stressed this morning," Sungyoon observed in a tone that was too upbeat for her taste at that moment.

She only nodded. "This day is killing me. It hasn't even started and it's killing me."

"Why? It's the last day before break!" he beamed.

"I love you, Sungyoon, but if you don't wipe that smile off your face I'll do it for you."

He pouted. "What's with you?"

"What's with me?" she snapped. "I haven't had a cigarette in two hours, nor have I had the opportunity to have any coffee because of these fucking people!" She gestured to the line in front of them that moved painfully slow.

Sungyoon's owl eyes scanned the room to make sure nobody heard. The roar of every employee in the school drowned her out, but even so, he was paranoid. "Watch it! You could get in trouble."

She widened her eyes, feigning terror. "Really? Is big brother gonna get me in twouble?" Almost as quick as they had widened, they rolled back as far as she could manage. "I don't give a shit."

"I don't like this," he said with a pout. "What do you need to take the edge off?"

She looked at him seriously. "I need a shot."

"I might be able to swing that...shot of what?"

"Gin."

"You called me, Satan?" Jin said with a forced smile as he joined her and Sungyoon at the back of the line. Sungyoon grinned at the man whose shoulders could rival the horizon.

Victoria gripped the mug so hard Sungyoon worried it might break. "On second thought, make it ethanol."

"Ouch."

Sungyoon looked between the two, a little conflicted. He'd always liked Jin, but Victoria hated him and he didn't know how to please the both of them.

"Guys," he said while putting a hand on each of their shoulders. Luckily he never brought his own coffee cup. Despite how much he wanted to bring his cup with a black cat painted on the front, Victoria would have thrown it across the room by then. "It's really time to put childish things aside."

Victoria's eye twitched as he went on. Jin only shot daggers at her.

"Let's do some 'when you, I feel'," Sungyoon continued while cracking his knuckles. "For example: when you don't do trust falls, I feel...like you should do trust falls." The pair looked at him quizzically. "So, just do the dang trust fall!"

Victoria shook her head quickly in defeat. "Fine." She looked Jin squarely in the eyes. "Jin, when you talk, I feel shut up!"

Jin moved his broad shoulder away from Sungyoon's hand. "This is pointless. I don't need coffee." He stormed out of line to go to his classroom at the end of the hall. Somehow, despite the boiling anger in her blood, something inside Victoria made her stomach churn with uncertainty.

"You're not the only one!" she retorted before going the opposite way toward her room on the floor above.

-

The twelve-year-olds stared back at her with confused eyes. She was lounging in the chair behind her desk—much like Namjoon the previous night—with her feet propped up and one finger pressing on her temple. Her narrowed eyes darted around the room to meet the gazes of the kids.

"Let's be honest." Her feet hit the floor with a thump. "I know you little rats have cigarettes or alcohol or some kind of drug on you."

The eyes of the students widened.

"Don't worry. I'm not a nark." She stood and slammed her hands down on the wood. "I want your shit."

The hand of Yoon Saera rose slowly. Victoria looked upon her small frame before nodding for her to speak. "I don't think any of us have drugs or alcohol, Miss."

"Ah, Saera," she said, walking around to sit on her desk. "You were always the brown nose. And I admire that!" she added. "However, I'm not looking for your typical goody-two-shoes facade right now." She stood again to roam the isles of desks. "This is a one-time offer, people. Give up whatever you have now and I won't snitch."

Junsu spoke without raising his hand, watching her glide down his isle. "Are you okay, Ms. Song?"

"No, Junie, I'm not okay." She whipped around to face him. "I'd really like for you gremlins to DO WHAT I'M SAYING!" Her eyes passed over the entire room. "But I guess we're just going to be difficult."

She made the short trek back to her chair before staring them down once more. "Since you all refuse to help me out, I'll refuse to help you out. Get out your textbooks, maggots."

-

Finally, the day was over. It was four PM and Victoria could go smoke at the pool and not have to worry about work. Her skin soaked up the rest of the sun as it hung lazily over the trees. The smoke in her lungs didn't feel suffocating this time—this time she felt free.

It was liberating in its very nature. The branches sprawling overhead, the leaves blowing slightly in the breeze. A few wisps of her hair danced around her head to the same tune, causing a hazy smile to cross her face. 

She felt so peaceful that even her phone's ringtone didn't phase her. She only picked it up calmly. "Hello?"

"Hey, I just got out of school. Wanna hang out?"

Victoria blew out and nodded, forgetting that Iseul couldn't see her. "Yeah. I'm at the pool."

"Okay, I'll head over."

Without another word, she hung up before taking in a long drag and closing her eyes against the sun.

Then it happened. The yells and whoops and laughs of young boys began to echo faintly through the forest. Her eyes shot open, feeling heavy from the short-lived relaxation. She waited for a minute. Maybe it's not them. Maybe it's just some kids fucking around in the woods.

But it was them. There was no denying the familiarity in the way their voices sounded shrill and crisp all the way from the bottom of the mountain or however far away they were. She didn't want to risk running into them, so she quickly stood and threw her cigarette down before giving it a stomp and rushing toward the trees.

She hated going the back way since it took so much longer, but there was really no choice. Occasionally, she looked behind her shoulder to make sure nobody saw her. That's when she was met with resistance from another person that almost knocked her down.

When she met their gaze, her breath hitched in her throat.

"Ah, shit."