Shiv

It was just as I had imagined, even the atmosphere was same. It was a slow quick small pecks on her soft plump lips. I closed any gap between us by bringing her close to me by pulling her by her waist with one hand while my other hand moved from her chin to behind her ears. Her hands grabbed my shirt and fisted it right at my paunch which was kind of ticklish honestly. Her eyes had closed the minute our lips touched. 

And then I stopped, I didn't know if she liked the kiss, for some reason it did seem like she was inexperienced in this. Or may be, she was just too stumped to even make move. I didn't deepen the kiss as much as I wanted to know. I steadied her in my arms as her eyes were still tightly shut and then carefully studied her expressions in the dim light of the room. It wouldn't be wrong to say that she was on the focus. We had not even turned on all the lights after we entered the villa from our day trip. Slowly, she opened her eyes and looked at me. 

Anjali

It was true! Everything around me had suddenly disappeared when his rather soft lips touched mine. All I could feel the entire time was his less than day old stubble on my chin. Pooja had said that the kiss makes everything disappear and that the only thing matters to you in the moment is the person kissing you. Shiv mattered to me, more than anything in the world. I, however had been so engrossed in the feeling that my mind had gone completely blank and didn't even let me respond to his kiss by mimicking his actions. 

This was my first kiss! Yes, I wasn't a virgin but I was a virgin for a lip kiss. I opened my eyes and found him looking at me carefully as though scanning my facial features. I realized I was gaping at him and his kissable lips when he called out, "Anjali !" 

I dropped my gaze and found that I had been clutching his shirt right at his belly. I loosened my hold as I was suddenly so aware of his torso and how I close I was standing to him. Our bodies were practically touching each others. His hand still on waist and the other behind my ears, "Anjali, kuch kaho..."  I gazed up to look at him and saw his expressions changed from a calm and composed to a very concerned one. I had probably scared him with no response and then by dropping my gaze.

Say something, Anjali

I shook my head in a no. Next I know, his nose rubbed mine and then our foreheads touched,"Kuch kaho Anjali..." I closed my eyes as I couldn't look at his intense gaze. He moved his hands from my waist and my ear to my henna colored hands and held them in his and then placed my hands back at his belly. His hands then tested on my cheeks.

My gaze was still lowered and I made the first confession, "Th..Th...That was my first kiss." 

The next instant, he was kissing me again and I started to mimic his actions. This time I felt his tongue in my mouth as he deepened the kiss. It was as if the kiss sent electric currents down my spine spreading warmth and building desire inside.

We must have been at it for a really long time because I felt myself gasping for air when we parted. I opened my eyes to see him just holding me steady in his strong arms. He was stroking my cheek with his other hand while I realized my hands had reached his shoulders. We were both still drenched from the rain. 

I could feel his intense gaze so I looked at him only to find him smiling at me. Melting under his gaze, I hugged him. 

"Anjali, that was good and I am happy to take this step with you !" He whispered right in my ear. I don't know why but that assurance made my eyes water.

"Shall we change? We don't want to get sick on our honeymoon." I nodded and I was almost about to break the hug when he pulled me in one more time. 

"I am carrying protection. Just wanted to let you know and check if there is something that doesn't work with you." I met his gaze and nodded smiling shyly.

If only I could tell you Shiv, the fears for the moment upto the point of actual act. I knew I would find courage to let him be close for the act but for the mood leading upto it, I wasn't sure at all. I had no idea how to put on a s*xy lingerie for him.

*****

After changing into a night suit, me and Shiv ordered dinner. Shiv was wearing a fresh pair of pyjamas along with a round neck shirt that we had bought from the mall the order day. I still couldn't believe I had my first kiss. 

I had left Shiv to order and he had ended up ordering Pizza and soft drink, a great choice he thought after the heavy BBQ lunch on the ship. It was indeed a great choice. 

Just like last night, Shiv made sure the entrance door to the villa was locked before going over to close the bedroom doors that opened up to the waters. He also draped the curtains over the glass doors before walking over and sitting next to me on the large king size bed. 

"You didn't judge me or ask me a question about my first kiss." I said looking at him. 

He scooted close to me and wrapped his arm around me. "I am not a virgin otherwise, Shiv." My eyes quickly filled up and I hated it this time. Couldn't I just reduce some water levels to my tear ducts?

"Ssssshhh ... We don't have to talk about it, not today!" He said, "We achieved a milestone today, so let's leave it that. I am going to cuddle all that I want. You know why?" 

He raised his eyebrows at me and I asked him , "Why?"

"Because I need it and you need it too. So, you can take off the bra now." I looked at him curiously awaiting a reason or an explanation but all he did was smirk. He was so close to me that I could count the number of lines that formed near his eye as he smirked. 

"Shiv. What?" He trying to suppress a laugh.

"Don't you take it off when you think I am asleep?" I could feel my ears all warm at this, I had indeed been taking it off when I thought he was asleep. I was so used to sleeping without it in the privacy of my bedroom in my maternal home that now I couldn't sleep with one on. 

"It's ok. We know it's not comfortable wearing one all day. Most women do that thinking men don't understand. But trust me, men do!"  Now, I was all shying and nervously tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. 

"I do mean to take it off in the bathroom or I'll close my eyes. Don't want to make it uncomfortable for you." treating and amusement was dripping in his voice.

So I did take off my bra in the bath area and came back with the dupatta draped over my chest to make it more comfortable for me. 

Shiv turned off the lights as I sat down on the bed. He did leave a small light in the bath area on so that I wouldn't feel scared of anything. 

The moment my head hit the pillow, I felt Shiv come close to me and put his arm over my waist.  He was lying on his belly his face. We lay there cuddling for a long time and talking about dolphins and whales once more. He kissed my cheek when I felt drugged myself from sleep and closed my eyes silently praying that this is how I went to spend my days and nights now - with Shiv!

**********

Shiv

She was sleeping soundly in my arms while I remain awake due to over tiredness. The kiss! It was the most natural, more satisfying than anything else. It was as if we had finally connected. There was a path to complete acceptance. A path for both of us to walk on. I felt a burden lift off of me. 

I stared at her innocent face in the dim light and smiled. It hit me really hard when she said it was her first kiss. I was her first kiss! I should have been proud that I was her first but knowing that she was hurt so bad made me think life had been cruel to her. I was also furious with that man for treating her so unfairly. Sleeping with her while concealing your identity was beyond my imagination. Like a typical Hindu bride, she must have saved herself for her groom and he had just ruined it all for selfish reasons. I just hope it was all consented between even though there were lack of emotions. Marital rape is sadly not punishable by our law system but it was so prominent that I wish there was a law against such heinous crime. 

I could now completely understand why she had to see a professional therapist and seek assistance. I hadn't eliminated this possibility but then I had seriously stopped myself from thinking about her s*x life before our marriage. I really didn't want it to matter to me and so I had stopped myself. 

Now, I knew she wanted to talk it out because clearly there were things that bothered her and there were things that she wanted to let me know. I was going to listen to her, I had to, but just not today. I pulled away from Anjali and made sure she was at peace before stepping out of the bed for a quick bathroom break.

Naturally, my stomach growled as I sat on the bed after coming back from the bathroom. I quietly walked up to the table in the foyer and opened the steel 'dabba' to get a round 'besan laddu'. Popping it in my mouth, I smiled at the familiar 'ma ke haath ka swaad'. Uff! This food is my weakness. Yaar, kuch toh soch, bichari Anjali ke baare me. Uss par haavi na ho jaana.

dabba = storage container/lunch box
besan laddu = Indian sweet in shape of a small round ball
ma ke haath ka swad = mother's home made food's taste

Think a little, about poor Anjali. Don't stress her out with your growing weight

I legit cannot translate 'haavi' at this point.

******

Now that we had kissed, all I wanted to do as soon as I got up from bed was to kiss her again. I had just showered and saw Anjali standing staring at the open sea with the coffee mug in her hand. She was wearing a pink color salwar suit today and needless to say the very 'desi' look with her henna colored hands and the nuptial chain around her neck made her look very beautiful.

I walked over to her and gently pulled her into my arms taking care not to spill coffee on her. I then kissed her forehead and slowly trailed kisses on her cheeks and stopped by right at her lips. "Can I get kiss?" She stared at me wide eyed as if taken by surprise. "Shiv, I have coffee breath on me." I grabbed the coffee cup from her and put it on the table nearby. 

"Chalega." With that kiss, I pressed my lips on hers. In between the pecks on her lips, I muttered, "It's only been two days but I miss our good old masala chai. The one made in milk." 

chalega = works

She shyly nodded, "Me too".

"Let's see if there is any 'desi' restaurant for some 'Masala chai'. 

"Hmmm" I hummed pressing a kiss on her cheek while she giggled.

***** 

We had ordered breakfast of pancakes along with a side of fresh cut fruits and coffee and were waiting for our order to be served to us any minute now. I felt my phone buzz in my pocket and both Anjali stared at me as I fished out the phone from my pocket. Both of us were surprised at the network reception and figured since the main resort area was close to the island there was network here unlink our private villa. 

"It's Papa's phone number. I mean Shekhar Papa." I gave her the phone. 

"It's a video call, Shiv." She looked at me and I shrugged as I had not checked if it was a voice call or a video call. Anjali and I were seated opposite to each other on the table so I took a seat next to her as she received the call.

"Ma, how are you? Is everything alright? How is Papa ?" Anjali shot questions at her mother who appeared on the phone screen looking all worried. 

"We are fine, beta. Sorry to call and disturb you and Shiv."

I had to chime in. "Ma, please don't be so formal. You should not be thinking before calling your own children. How is Papa? Is everything ok?" I glanced sideways at Anjali and saw her clutching a paper napkin tightly looking all anxious.

"He is fine, beta. Actually, your father had called us this morning inquiring about our health and also asked if we needed anything. He said that Harshit can get us anything that we want while you two are away." I was feeling immensely proud of my family right now. However, next to me Anjali was sniffling and needless to say Mohini Ma was crying too. 

"Ma, it's ok. We are one big family now. Where is Papa?" I said as I also reached out for Anjali's hand which was not clutching the phone.

"He is feeling extra emotional right now. He only wished to talk to you two but now he is feeling embarrassed to come infront of the camera." She sighed in between her sobs

"Ma, hand over the phone to him." I said and as Ma went to the bedroom I mouthed to Anjali, "You have to help me here. Ok?"  She nodded at me. 

So, together me and Anjali spoke to the parents and we hoped we cheered them up. Cheering up Anjali was easy, I only had to wink at her and kiss her soft pink cheeks as we were sitting next to each other and a sweet smile spread across her beautiful face. "Shiv!" She gasped. "So what, nobody can see us on this corner table and we are on our honeymoon." 

I had to say this, the weather out here really made me feel light headed and all relaxed. Importantly, Anjali and I were making progress. 

********

Anjali

We were on a bus tour that the resort had organized for all the families and honeymooners' alike. I had expressed my concern to Shiv about being uncomfortable with being in the company of honeymooners and he had assured me that it would be fine. I didn't nudge on it further as I didn't want to spoil it for him. Shiv was quite excited when we had received the note and tickets to the bus tour after breakfast. 

I also didn't want to come across as someone got scared at the prospect of being in a public setup. The way he was speaking to my parents, taking care of broken me or even eating my mother's home made sweets was already making me fall for him. His gestures triumphed so much that I was already questioning if I was already in love with him.

We were right now waiting at the entrance of the gardens which had a beautiful collection of plants and flowers alike as a subsection of the gardens was a botanical garden while the other sub-section had viewing chambers one of the most beautiful waterfalls of the islands. 

The gardens were not typical and required everybody to be on a buggy/open all terrain vehicle ride. The entire group was split into small groups of 4 or 5 people at max. Shiv and I were waiting for our ride with the other couple who looked significantly younger than us.  Anchal and Mahesh Bhan as they had introduced themselves. Shiv led the introduction for us and I smiled at them. The young couple were clearly in love and very excited for this adventure as they held hands and made discreet remarks in each others ears. Shiv and me on the other hand waited calmly holding hands with Shiv stroking the back of my palm with his thumb. 

We hopped on when our ride arrived. Shiv and I sat at the back while Anchal and Mahesh sat at the front with the driver sitting at the very forefront. 

"Shiv bhai, aapki aur bhabhi ji ki shaadi kab hui?" Mahesh spoke up during the bumpy ride. I saw Anchal elbow him. Anchal then spoke up.

Shiv brother, when did you and bhabhi (sister in law) get married?

"I was just going to say that not all tourist on today's tour are newly married. There are just families too. Mahesh meant no offense though."

"As a matter of fact, me and Anjali are newly married. We got married last week." Shiv smiled squeezing my hand even so more.  

"Oh, I am so sorry. Aapko dekh kar laga nahi ki aap newly married hain. As in age wise, both of you loo like ummm mature. " I felt a rush of disappointment. Why was society always so judgy?

"Anchal, didn't you see how they look at each other? Bhabhi ji was shying away like a new bride when Bhai offered his hand to hop on to the buggy. One can easily say they are newly married." 

Shiv looked at me and smiled, "Yes, she is my bride." He put my hand which was already in his on his chest. "When did you two get married?" 

So, the rest of the ride around the gardens was pretty good and quite adventurous. Shiv and I took a lot of pictures of the beautiful landscape as a background. Anchal and Mahesh volunteered to take our pictures and it was quite obvious they wanted to clicked as well. They were being little immature but who could blame them for their age and the fact that it's their honeymoon. 

The bottom of waterfalls was accessible via a zipline. I wasn't sure about how I felt about this sport but I was hoping doing this with Shiv would probably be exciting! 

There were a handful of people by the zip line either waiting for their turn or zip lining. I could recognize the familiar faces from our bus ride. The staff mandated that only a certain amount of people be present at any given point in time to give everyone the feel of privacy and actually intake the beauty of this place.

The tourist guide accompanying us walked over to us and pointedly looked at Shiv, "Sir, I cannot allow you on the zipline. You look overweight for this. I am so sorry!" 

Shiv looked like a little child who was heartbroken over not getting a candy. One thing I learnt about Shiv was that he really liked outdoor adventures and his face lit up the entire ride since this morning. "It's ok. Please just take care of my wife." The tour guide nodded in a yes I saw Anchal mutter something into her husbands ears as she overheard us.  

"I won't go either. " I looked at the tour guide as I responded.

Shiv took me to the side which was where he was 'supposed' to wait for me.
I wasn't going to go all alone. What fun would it be! "Main aapko chod kar nahi jaungi, Shiv." 

I won't leave you and go!

"Arey, bas 20 minute ki baat hai. Jao na, I'll take your picture. I am not feeling bad." 

It's a matter of only 20 minutes. Go!

"Shiv, please. I will not go alone." He sighed and took my hands in his and was about to say something but I spoke up, "This is our honeymoon. If we can't do an activity together then we better not do it. I am probably going to sound very cliched, but I want to be your companion, Shiv in every walk of life. I know I am being a bollywood movie kind of wife but I don't want to leave you and go. I have already said this and I want to say it again that I will be by you in your weight-loss journey until you are healthy enough to keep diseases at bay."  

The next instant I was taken aback as Shiv started kissing me. I was suddenly very conscious of our surroundings but the kiss was so captivating that I was lost in it and our tongues engaged in a dance of their own. My hands found their way to his shoulders while hands were clutching my waist. He suddenly muttered "Thank you!" between kisses. 

I pulled away from him, "We will get caught." 

"By whom? There is no one around." He raised his eyebrows at me.

I felt my cheeks, lips and ears all warm and a sudden tingle in my body when I saw his wet lips, "Shiv, I ... Them" 

He chuckled, "You should take advantage of the fact that your husband can hide you when hugs you. "

"Shiv!" I lowered my gaze only to find myself engulfed in his hug.

"I will take care in future, I respect your choice, it was indeed bold of me to kiss you in relatively public space but trust me even if someone saw us, it shouldn't matter. We are husband and wife." 

We took pictures for Mahesh and Anchal as they excitedly took turns on the zipline. Even though I was annoyed at Anchal's remark, we did not hold any resentment and figured they would be happy looking at their pictures. 

To our complete surprise, next stop we made as we thought we were exiting the premises was right in the center of turtle breeding hub. There were a few hundred year old tortoises roaming around and tourists (again in batches of 4 or 5) could actually step down and feed leaves to these grownups of their kind for a euro each. Shiv muttered in my ears, "Umm, big and cute, no?". That husband of mine was in some mood for romance since this morning. I nodded shyly in a yes!

Shiv managed to convince me that we both can do 'the activity of feeding tortoise' together and I didn't object now knowing he loved adventures and he could not zip line earlier. It was a big squishy, wrinkly tortoise and I hid myself squealing in Shiv's arms. 

**********

It was nearly sunset as we reached back our resort. The dining area was perfectly setup for the day tourist to now sit back and relax after the days activities.

We all sat down as refreshments started making rounds. Everybody scattered soon enough and began chatting. Some couples and families with kids made their way to the beach close to the water, while others were 'getting to know' each other. I excused myself to use the restroom and Shiv started to chat with Mahesh who approached with a couple more men. 

I was so tired that I could feel every bit of my feet hurt and ache from all the walking around and hopping on and off from the bus, all terrain vehicle/buggy. I was walking back from the restroom in dire need of some water and a cup of hot beverage.

I spotted my tall and big husband, perhaps this was good as it was really easy to spot Shiv because of his weight. He was still talking to the group of men so I looked around to spot some familiar faces when I also saw Anchal talking to a group of ladies who looked all Indian. The resort had guests coming from across the globe. 

I decided to talk to walk up to them and try doing things that a normal woman would do, that I would do before I was subjected to that torture. 

This scene was suggested by @MehweenGR.I hope I did justice to this amazing request :) 

"Adhed umar main shaadi karke romance karne me sharam bhi nahi aati." Anchal was saying.

They married in their middle and have no shame romancing. 

"What is adhed?" This lady looked Indian but her accent said she was not. 

"Adhed means middle age. Shiv, that fat guy over there wasn't allowed on the zipline. So, they both were heavily making out. He is so fat, I am telling you they looked funny when they were even hugging." I wanted to literally punch Anchal in the face and delete all pictures we took of them. 

"Oh My, he is really big . I have heard such men with belly fat are not good in bed, and what is that, pepper hair already. How old is he?" The lady asking adhed was speaking.

"Are you sure they are on honeymoon? and nobody is here having an illicit affair?" This one looked like an aunty, probably a little older than me but she had a toddler resting in her lap.

My eyes filled up. I had heard enough. I was used to hearing taunts for me but I was not going to tolerate a word against my husband, my Shiv. PERIOD.  He is a gem and that is how he deserved to be treated. I finally made my presence felt. "I will tell you." 

"Anjali ji!" Anchal looked all shocked

I was practically shaking with anger "Sorry? Is that what you want to say?" 

"Anjali, we were just casually chatting, that's all." 

"And casually passing remarks on my husband. If you have questions, you should have come to me or Shiv directly. You have no right to talk about my man. I really wonder why people are so shallow and nobody wants to see the person beyond his physical appearance."

As I paused, I suddenly felt complete silence around me and it seemed like I had gathered some attention from a few tables nearby. "Yes, we are here on our honeymoon and incase anybody is wondering, we got married last week." I felt my voice shaking and my eyes started to fill up. Then, I felt Shiv's presence as he held my hand and turned to look at me, "Anjali! What happened?" 

Slowly we moved away from the group of ladies as Shiv led me to a far off table. I didn't want to talk to Shiv with tears in my eyes. I had been fuming and sometimes when I was very angry, tears rolled down my cheeks. So, I just kept my face hidden in my hands while Shiv sat next to me and placed my head on his shoulder. "Let it go, Anjali. Not worth the hurt and tears." He spoke stroking my shoulder. 

A heard footsteps approaching us but I had no courage left in me to see what was up, "Mahesh, later please!" I heard Shiv say. 

"Anchal hurt Bhabhi ji. I am sorry on her behalf. The women had no right to talk about you Shiv Bhai." I heard Mahesh while I continued to remain in the warmth of my husbands embrace. 

"Thank you Mahesh! Appreciate it." Shiv responded back and I heard receding footsteps.

"Shiv, Can we go back?" Now that I was starting to cool down, I didn't understand how I got the courage to face these random strangers. Dadi's words rang in my ears - You should know how to respond when people is-treat or bad mouth people of your family. May be it was Dadi words giving me courage!

*******

Shiv and I sat down on the couch in the foyer of our villa.

"Anjali turned into Mrs. Shiv Raheja today." He smiled at me.

"I am Mrs. Shiv Raheja from the day I took the holy oath with you. I know we still have to you know...but I am sorry I had an outburst like that." He was squeezing my hand. 

"Anjali, aaj aapne mujhe ye bata diya ki mera faisla galat nahi tha, aap mere liye sahi hain." 

Anjali you have shown me today that my decision to marry you was not wrong. You are right for me.

He was still smiling at me. I lowered my gaze and said something I had wanted to say for a long time. "Aap ko ab mujhe aap nahi kehna chahiye. 'Tum' thik hai." 

You should now refer to me as tum. 'Tum' which is basically you but 'aap' is a more respectable form of you in Hindi.

"Either we both refer each other as 'aap' or as 'tum'. We are partners so no different treatment."  

I giggled and nodded. "Shiv, can I say something?"

"What is it?" He wrapped his arm on my shoulder. 

"Shiv you said yesterday I should let you know if there is something I want to tell you about protection and you know.. physical intimacy" I had decided I would tell him my fears. Hopefully, it was easy now that I was clearly falling for him.  

"Hmm, tell me." 

"I have trouble wearing those kind of outfits, you know the lingerie. It reminds of many things that I don't want to be reminded of."

He was looking at me very carefully, "When we were at the mall the other day shopping for you, I was reminded of the shopping that I was at with ..with Pooja before the wedding and it all came down... "

"Ok. I understand." I remained strong up until this point and then I melted. I was in tears again.

"Hey Hey." He placed his hands over both my shoulders and kneeled down infront of me.

"You are very strong. I can't tell you how proud and happy I am that you are opening up to me. It's not easy to say what are telling me. I respect you for that."

"Shiv, I am sorry for.." He cut me off

"Sorry for what? I want to say something too.May I?" 

I nodded. "Anjali, Trust me with everything you say. It will always remain with me and me only. For what you said today, I will take care of that. Also, just know that everytime you and me physically get intimate in this marriage, I will always put you above me, above my needs. A woman deserves that respect in my opinion." I circled my arms around his neck. He ended up resting his head in my lap. For the first time, I felt his hair, he had soft hair overall but pepper hair at the back. I smiled through my tears. They would never know how soft his pepper hair is!  

We remained in that position for a long time. And then I realized, I had deprived my husband of the resort's special dinner tonight! Ouch!

After freshening up, we ended up ordering in and sitting by the pool in dim lights coming from the room and starry night.

***************

So, how was it? Thoughts?

I had a very bad migraine attack last week and while I usually recover in a day or two this time the headaches continued throughout the week into the weekend as well. Hence, the delay! 

The pool scene is in next chapter. This one ended up being long. 

Do vote and share!