Anjali

When I woke up in the morning, Shiv had been sleeping in awkward position. He was basically resting on the headboard and sleeping. Fortunately, my cell phone alarm vibrations didn't wake him up which was a little odd as he was such a light sleeper. After a quick shower, I dressed up in a red salwar suit with red kurta and cream color salwar paired with a red and cream dual color dupatta. 

I was actually tip toeing in the room to be as quiet as possible in order to not wake up Shiv. I loved wearing sindoor on my forehead just as much as I adored wearing the mangalsutra signifying my union with Shiv. I was applying kohl when it really stood me out, is he unwell ? He has never slept in until late all the days I married. 

I walked over to him and found him calmly sleeping. I then sat beside him in the little space that was available on his side and noticed his day old stubble. I felt the need to scratch it a little bit but then I bit back a smile. This man had my heart already and he didn't even know it. 

My gaze traveled to his belly where his hands were resting. I was reminded of the time that I had commented to Pooja on the day I met Shiv that he has a dad bod symbolizing a happy man.

He slowly opened his eyes and gave me a smile that was capable of filling my entire being,  "Good morning!" 

I smiled back and then I gasped hearing his voice. I thought I was imagining him but he was actually awake while I was gawking at him. 

"Ji, good morning!" I tried to compose myself.

"Kya hua? Aise dekh rahi thi ? By the way, you are all ready. What time is it?" 

What happened? You were looking at me like this.

"Ji, it's 7:30. I was thinking of leaving at 8:30 so I can reach by 9. If you are up, you can freshen up. I will go and make breakfast."  It was now I looked at him properly, his eyes were puffy, he hadn't slept perhaps. Why did he look so worried?

"Anjali, don't worry about breakfast, Papa and Dadi are managing it. Also, breakfast duties are mine technically since Harshit goes to the gym in mornings. "

"Ji, I haven't done anything in this home. I should start now. As in, everybody in this house contributes in the kitchen, so I should too." He had explained to me one of these days that everybody contributes in the kitchen and so I should never feel guilty of telling him that I won't be cooking for any reason.

"Start on weekend then. Anyways, dadi will ask you to make something sweet first and then will give you kharchi too." I nodded but I was already planning on atleast helping out some in the kitchen.

kharchi = token of money given as blessings usually by elders

Shiv then grabbed my hands and then spoke very seriously, "Anjali, there is something I need to talk to you about. Do you have a few minutes?" 

"Ji, tell me." I had started to panic. What was going on afterall? 

Shiv forwarded his phone to me. Confused, I asked him, "Why are you giving me your phone?" 

"Anjali, I received a message from Shikha around 3 in the morning congratulating me on the wedding. You can read it. I ..uh..I don't know how she found out but we do have a lot of mutual connections as we went to same college. I know the guest list was pretty limited but I suppose it just traveled to her."

I was staring at the lock screen of his phone in my hands trying to absorb everything he said after the word Shikha. Shikha loved Shiv, I love Shiv. Does she still love him? 
His lock screen was our selfie that we had taken on first morning of our marriage. 

Shiv continued, "Anjali, look, I haven't been in touch with her since that day in court. I didn't even have her international number but my number has remained the same."

I looked at him trying to say something but I couldn't understand what possibly I could mention to him. 

After a pause, Shiv continued, "Please Anjali, I don't know what to do. I..uh.. You don't need to feel insecure. This is really a closed chapter. You should know about this ..this message and it's wrong I feel."

I asked the question that had been swarming in my head for past few minutes,"Shiv, are you over her?"

"What?"

I was close to tearing up,"Have you really moved on, Shiv?"

Shiv lightly squeezed my hands that were still in his, "She asked for a separation, she wanted divorce. It is over. I have moved on which is why I re-married Anjali. And now, it's only you."

"Shiv, I can feel the honesty. I just..this is... I mean I can understand you because you are here infront of me but I don't know her. I don't know what to say. It was between you two and now it shouldn't be. I am married to you."

He then looked at me intently, "Anjali, please meri baat par bharosa kar lo. I am at a loss too. I don't understand. I contemplated informing her about my marriage to you before the wedding but I didn't want to talk to her when we were engaged. It would have been wrong to talk to her behind your back. I didn't even have the confidence to approach you regarding this." 

My gaze dropped to my lap,"Shiv, Aapne ne aur Shikha ne ek saath bahot lamba waqt bitaya hai. Shayad, us nazariye se aapko ek baar bata dena chahiye tha. Lekin ab bhi shayad ye galat nahi hai. Shayad hum hi zarurat se zyada gaur kar rahe hain iss pehlu par."  

Shiv, you and Shikha have spent a long time together. May be, you should have told her yourself. Maybe, its still not wrong. Maybe, we are giving this more importance than required.

Shiv then bought his one hand to my cheek, "But, I don't want you to feel insecure about anything. It is indeed over between me and Shikha. Divorce was hard and I am over it. I would never go down the path again. I am and will remain loyal to only you."

I nodded, "I don't know what to say." 

He further caressed my cheeks with his warm big hands, "Just support me a little. I am at a loss. What should I do?"

I placed my hand over his that was caressing my cheek, "Shiv, I ..uh..I don't know. I feel like I shouldn't come between you two but I am literally between you two."

He shook his head, "Meri patni ho, saare rasmon riwazon ke hawlay se or kagazat par bhi ab tum ho, Anjali. Kaho, kya chahti ho tum?"

You are my wife. Per the traditions and now per the legal papers too, Anjali. Tell me, what do you want.

I felt overwhelmed with his words. Even though I didn't know if he loved me back, he certainly gave me respect for being his wedded wife. I nodded, "Ji, I don't think I will be comfortable knowing that she can reach out to you like this. "

"And I understand that completely, I will close this out completely. I was thinking of blocking her number. Is it ok if I send a thank you?"

I searched his eyes to understand what he wanted, "Shiv, I think thats your choice. I am trusting you."

He sighed, "Thank you. I was very very worried about this. Jao, kuch kha lo. I will join you in a bit. I will drop you to your office as well."

Go, eat something.

I smiled and made my way to the kitchen. 

********

I couldn't concentrate on work at all. For past 30 minutes, I had been reading the same email on my laptop and trying to decipher my action items out of it. I had tried to very logical and practical at everything that Shiv had shared. A part of me really thought it was nothing, but then I couldn't imagine Shiv being anybody else's. He did say he will close it out permanently. I believed him. I really did. Maybe, I just had to wait and give it time to settle.

"Aap chinta nahi karo. Kaam kar lo aur jab ho jaaye to call kar dena. I will come to pick you up. Good luck! Ok?" 

You don't worry. Finish your work and call me once done. 

My colleague Leena had now messaged me the third time to come down for lunch. Finally, I managed to brush aside thoughts and grabbed my wallet and fruit that Dadi had insisted I take to work. She was unhappy because there were no left overs or actual food that I could carry for lunch. I was actually ok as I knew it would take to adjust to new schedule. Before marriage, I usually packed left overs or made a curry early in the morning that I packed or left the remaining for my parents lunch. 

I bought lunch in the cafeteria and sat down to eat. All of the lunch gang had already been teasing me and had made repeated asks in the last two days to meet with Shiv for a cup of tea. I wanted to talk to Shiv about it but I wasn't sure how he would react just yet. And now, we had another elephant between us. Why did she message him if she wanted to move away. 

********

Mohini

I put out the left over ice cream in two small bowls after lunch and then took it to my husband who was still seated on the dining table. 

My lips curved up thinking about the sweet moments when Shiv handed out gajray to my daughter. "Ji, why do we humans always want more?"

"What happened now, Mohini ji? What do you want more?" 

"Anjali is happy. Shiv is taking care of her and now all I wish is to see her having her own family. A little one in her arms will be so nice, isn't it? Ye dil aakhir hamesha aur hi chahta hai."

why does this heart always want more?

My husband gave me a warm smile, "I understand. When she was still going through her legal proceedings, we wanted to see her getting rid of it all. Then she did and we wanted to see her married again. We would be worried about what will happen once we are long gone and who will take care of her. How will she be all alone in this world. That happened too. Shiv stepped into our lives like a farishta. And now, this..."

farishta - angel

"Ji. Our Anjali is blessed."

"And that is why let us first be grateful for what she has received. She will get everything that she has deserved at the right time. We humans are very selfish but Mata Rani knows it all - She will bless Anjali when the time is right. Let us pray that her and Shiv's bond grows strong over time and that there is always love, understanding and trust between them."

"You are right. I just can't stop smiling all day."

"Mohini ji, include night too. I was scared last night that something is happening to you."

"Ji, Stop making fun of me. You are also happy that your son in law bought your favorite ice cream."

********

Shiv

I sat staring at my engagement slash wedding ring as I sat with my phone on the desk infront of me. 

I had typed a message so far, 

You:
Thank you Shikha. 
I passed on your congratulatory message to my wife
and she sends her thanks as well. 
I am happy and I hope you are doing good too. 
I have moved on! 

Sighing, I hit send and the message was sent. I would block the number in an hour.

I wiped my face even though I had not been sweating in my air conditioned office. From the first time Shikha had asked for a divorce to the final settlement day in court, everything was hard. But, and that was a big BUT, it was all over. 

Anjali - I should inform her. I then called her up, she received it almost instantly, "Ji, Shiv" 

I asked her,"Thik ho, Anjali?" 
Are you ok, Anjali

"Jee, Aap?" 
Yes, you?

I let out a sigh which I am sure she could hear over the phone as well, "Anjali, I sent her a reply. It's closed. Thank you very much for trusting me and guiding me."

"Shiv, I didn't do a thing."

I smiled a little at her modesty, "You did, as my wife. Did you eat lunch?"

"Ji, I was just eating actually. I just bought a meal in cafeteria. Did you eat? Shiv, you just had protein shake for breakfast." Ahh, the concern of a wife!

"I will eat now. Papa just came in to office sometime back and he bought lunch. We will eat in some time."

She hummed in response. I reminded her to call me when she was close to being done with work. This week was relatively easy and I wanted to spend some time with Anjali. 

Everytime, I felt like I was taking two steps forward in this marriage, I was offset back by the same number of steps. Last time, it was me who had brought up Shikha and this time Shikha herself had made a digital appearance. I just hoped no more, marriage was a piece of work. People often said, first few years of marriage are difficult and I found it hard to believe but now, I was beginning to believe it was true. 

Was it not possible to fast forward to time where Anjali and I had a strong bond?

I picked up my phone and walked over to Papa's office to eat lunch with him and Harshit. However, Harshit wasn't there and when I questioned Papa he said Harshit had left to go and meet a realtor agent as his friend wanted to move to a new rental property. It seemed odd but I sat down without further questions. 

After we had eaten, we went to wash hands and returned to Papa's office. Papa made me sit down and gave me a concerned look.

"Beta, I am somewhat worried for Harshit." 

I raised my eyebrows but remained silent for him to continue, "Harshit has been acting strange for past few days. When you were away, he didn't return home one night. He said he was with Rahul, his childhood friend. He returned home fine next day, beta. He remained quiet or you can say off all day. Maine baat ki lekin mujhse kuch share nahi kiya hai usne. Pata nahi kuch dil me ghabrahat lag rahi hai. Mujhe lagta hai beta kahin koi ladki toh nahi hai. Beta, I have already told him what I had told you, I will always support him. Ek baar tum baat kar ke dekho na." 

I spoke to him but he didn't share anything with me. I am worried for him. I think there is a girl in his life. Please talk to him.

I absorbed everything that he had said, "But Papa, Harshit is very mature. If there was something along the lines of a girl, he would have told us by now."

"Beta, I am worried for him. Something is off for sure. I found him talking to your mother's picture. He does that only when he is sad. Actually, he was nearly crying beta."

I felt extremely guilty of not being close to my brother at this point. "I will talk to him. You don't worry, ok. He is mature and understanding. He is our baby but he is more mature than me and Shivi combined I feel sometimes. "

My father sighed and then he continued, "Anjali beti ke saath tum khush nazar aa rahe ho. I am very happy to see that. Beta, you are still newly married, do make efforts to spend time with her. I know, I am telling you to talk to Harshit but Anjali beti is your wife. Understand. Okay?" 

I nodded, "Yes, Papa."

I further informed Papa about picking up Anjali on the way back home. Papa was going to leave with Mr. Jain who was one of our oldest employees and Papa's friend now. I had no idea what Harshit was thinking or doing and I was beginning to get worried but not too worried.

*******
Anjali

Shiv had just texted me that he was waiting in the car by the car park area for me. I quickly made my way along with Leena who was leaving at the same time too. Shiv was standing and leaning against the car wearing blue formal shirt with dark brown pants with his hands in his pocket. He waved at me which I quickly acknowledged and then turned to say bye to Leena. Leena giggled and said, "He is looking so dapper. Hope we get to meet him for chai soon." She gave me a thumbs up and parted ways to her cab.  

I blushed and made my way to Shiv who was really looking dapper. Shiv gave me warm smile, "How was your day? Come sit, home?" 

"Ji, it was nice. Yes, let's go home."  I responded. 

"Who was that?" He gestured towards where Leena had gone. I sat down in the passenger seat and buckled up as Shiv started the engine. 

"Umm. That was my colleague, Leena. I generally eat lunch with her or go for tea with her."

By now we were almost out of my office building premises when Shiv spoke up. "That's good. Anjali, are we all good?"

I was hesitant on touching the subject so I was glad he touched it. I did want closure. "Ji, we are all good."

I had not realized Shiv was looking at me intently or even that our car was actually halted for the red lights to turn green. He reached out for my hand and grabbed it quickly. He then gently squeezed my hand. The lights turned green but he didn't let go of my hand. Instead, he placed my hands on the gear to change since Shiv's car was run on manual transmission. 

He continued driving while holding my hands. I blushed thinking about the time I was in his car when we were still not married. A phone call had interrupted what might have been a potential kiss. I looked at him and saw him smiling a little. May be, he was feeling at peace too with the closure. 

I glanced outside the window and silently began observing the evening chaos in the city. We continued to hold hands for the rest of the journey back home. 

********

"Meri pyaari pyaari Dadi, Kya kar rahin hain aap?" We had just keyed in the door and Shiv gushed over Dadi like a little boy returning from school. Dadi was peeling green peas sitting on the sofa with the peels on one side and peas in a small bowl on other side. 

My lovely Dadi, what are you doing?

"Aa gaye, Mere pyaare pyaare bache. Go wash up and come. We will have some tea." Dadi squealed with the same delight as her grandson. A smile automatically made its way to my lips and I greeted Dadi. 

My lovely kids are back!

I followed Shiv to our room. Putting my things down in one corner of the wardrobe that I had taken over, I took out a cotton salwar kameez suit to wear at home along with a towel and made my to the restroom. 

****MATURE****

I almost bumped into Shiv as he opened the door to the restroom just as I was about to open as well, "Ji? Can I go first?"

Shiv was a couple of inches taller than me "Umm, there is a better idea.  Pehle aap jayengi, phir main jaunga. Bahot waqt lag jayega. Dadi said to come soon. There is a better idea. Saath me freshen up ho jaayein?" 

First you will go, then I will go. That will end up taking time. Let's just freshen up together.

My eyes widened, did he just say we shower together? My cheeks warmed up and I started stuttering, "Shiv, ummm, wo..nahana..jaldi ..dadi..chai..."

Shiv, that...bath..fast...dadi..tea

He chuckled holding my wrist, "Why are you saying only words ? I promise we will make it fast. It will also save water and time both." He then winked at me. 

I was staring at him still trying to understand when he gestured me to go inside. I took a step inside but then he didn't follow me. So, I turned around and saw that he stood by the door with his clothes in one hand, "Aa jaun phir?"

Shall I come in then?

My cheeks felt on fire, I lowered my gaze and nodded and then turned around. I felt my heartbeats rise and took off my dupatta. I could see from the mirror, Shiv had already taken off his shirt. He was now undoing his belt while humming,
"Kaanon mein ik dil ki baat sunawan ni
Tainu hassda vekh ke
Jag nu main bhull jawan ni'

Hor dass kinniyan tareefan chahida tenu"

Bollywood song - I pasted the translation too, it's hilarious but it sounds wonderful in Punjabi

Come I'll whisper a thing of my heart in your ears,
When I see you smile,

I forget the world.
Tell me how I should explain this to you.

Ohh, so this is the song he had been humming. I smiled looking at him fixedly.

He paused, raised his eyebrows at me, "Need help, madam? Weren't you in hurry?" 

I shook my head feeling inhaling a deep breath looking at his almost bare form - he had stepped out of his pants.

He then walked over to me, "An-ja-li, you need help, wifey!" Saying so, he placed his hands on waist and pulled up the kurta. 

Soon, I was standing naked yet covered by Shiv who was naked too in the shower. The warm water trickled down my form while Shiv let out a soft 'Ahh' as the warm water started to relax our tensed muscles.

I was hiding myself in his broad chest when I felt him kissing my shoulders sending currents down my spine. I blushed, I had never lowered my gaze when he had taken off his briefs but he had just gathered me in his arms. 

Sure, the water was warm and his lips felt even more warm. I , however thought he had just let out a sob. 

I called him out of concern, "Shiv!"

He only hummed and planted more kisses on my collar bone. 

I repeated the question, "What is wrong?"

"Let me be with you for some time. This smell of yours is really intoxicating. Let me be here." His voice was nearly choked up. 

I let him be in my arms. I did feel him putting some weight on me. The water continued to find different paths to trickle down to the floor. Minutes passed by. I finally found my voice, "I am with you." 

I felt like repeating what he had told me once, "I am not leaving you alone."

We finally broke apart and he smiled down at me, "We need to hurry up." Saying so, he grabbed the bottle of shower gel and began lathering up my body in it. 

Very shyly, I mimicked his actions and began covering up his big body in shower gel. He chuckled when I touched his belly, "Some more days, then this will be gone." I giggled like a teenager, I was slowly getting comfortable in his touches. 

********

Shiv had volunteered to make tea to which Dadi had instantly said yes as she wanted to chat with me. 

For a good minute, I thought she would tell me off for spending a chunk of time simply freshening up but Dadi ended up telling me that Karwa Chauth was next week and she would leave after Karwa Chauth for Punjab. She was going to stay to give me my official 'sargi' as my senior mother in law and then leave two days after. 

Dadi had made me feel so warm and welcome even before my marriage to Shiv that my face actually fell when she said she would be going back. Besides, I genuinely felt I will be vulnerable without a maternal figure who was calm and composed as Dadi. 

"Dadi, why don't you stay back? We all are here. We will take care of you." I said wrapping my arm around her fragile body. 

She placed her hand on my cheek, "Beta, I know you will take care of me. I will miss you all too. I always do but my home is where your Dadaji's home is. You will understand what I am saying one day. I got married to your Dadaji when I was only a teenager, so I have spent many many years in that home and have so many memories too. I feel I am closer to him when I am in that home and I want to be closer to him always." 

Shiv walked in with tray of cups of tea and biscuits. "Dadi, this is not fair. I also came back from work. Talk to me, spend time with me."

Dadi laughed while responding "Come, sit." 

Shiv handed out tea to both us ladies before taking his own cup and sitting very close to me. I felt my heartbeats rise once again. Shiv then winked at me.I quickly glanced at Dadi fearing she would have noticed but she was already sipping her tea.

I took a sip from my own cup and saw Shiv had raised his eyebrows mouthing me 'how is it'.  The tea was indeed fantastic after a long, hot, sensuous shower. I bit back a smile and glanced at Shiv who winked at me again and chuckled.

"Shiv beta, when is your Papa coming home? And where is Harshit?" Dadi's voice made me jump in my skin. Shiv remained unaffected though, 

"Papa is coming with Jain uncle, Dadi. Let me call Harshit after this tea. I have no idea when he is coming."

And so we sipped piping hot masala tea which was rather delicious as we spoke for a long time until it was time to prepare for dinner. 

********

Shiv

Over the last couple days, both me and Anjali were just getting back into the rhythm of each of our workplaces but more than that, we were really trying to find our very own rhythm. Anjali seemed mostly unpacked and she said she now found everything that she mostly wanted on a daily basis. 

I had a chat with Anjali the night Dadi had mentioned Karwa Chauth to her. It really wasn't necessary for her to fast and I wanted to make sure she knew that. Shikha had never fasted as she never believed in the ritual but she also couldn't go hungry for long periods of time. 

Anjali, however had said she would observe the ritual and follow all traditions. Infact, Dadi had asked me to get a list of all items that Dadi wanted to present to Anjali. 

Today was Saturday, so holiday for Anjali but I was still working. I had been to the gym in the morning and then bought everything that Dadi had asked me to get. I had then informed Papa and Harshit that I will come late into office as I wanted to get started on Anjali's driving lessons. 

Anjali was a cute ball of nerves as she got in the washroom to get ready. I had assured her that it would be fine and today is only the first lesson. While Anjali was getting ready, I was thinking about Harshit. Was Papa really right ? There was nothing odd that I had noticed in the past few days. But then, I had promised Papa that I would talk to him. I need to sit down with him. 

Some easy things are so difficult when you grow up!

*******

Briefing Anjali about the basics, she sat down on the driving seat in Sai's garage and I sat on the passenger seat. 

"Start the car. Don't worry, ok?" She nodded but then did nothing. 

"What?" I looked at her as few minutes passed by. She was muttering to herself, "accelerator, break and clutch. Left to right! Ok!" 

She was seriously so cute sometimes that I wished to simply hug her and bask in her cuteness and warmth. 

"Start now." I told her gently.

She looked at me and then her eyes widened, "Ji, you are not wearing seat belt!" 

I chuckled, "We are only going to drive a few meters. It's ok!" 

But then she was not convinced and I finally gave in and put the seat belt on. Well, safety is important at all times!

"Start now!" I nudged her again.

"Ji, how?" She looked at me with her eyebrows furrowed as though confused.

"It's a button start car. Simply, push the button, Anjali." I smiled. "Come on now, start and put her foot on the break!"

"Ji, I know it is button start. But, don't you see there?" She pointed to the empty car park space infront of us and I wondered what she was trying to say. "There is a pigeon right there nibbling onto something."

I laughed out loud this time, "Anjali! It's a pigeon, it will fly when it will sense a car is approaching and it is very far from you."

She looked at me with tears brimming in my eyes. "Oh My God! Anjali, I am sorry. I didn't mean to laugh like that..."

********

Finally! This chapter is out! 

I wrote this in way too many seatings but I am glad about this chapter.

Thoughts?

Don't forget to vote and share if you like!