Art Credit: @windbyfire on Tumblr, Instagram and Twitter

*We apologize for any brain damage that might occur from either reading the following words or banging your head against the wall after reading said words. We are also not willing to pay for therapy which might be needed after reading this chapter. And finally, we caution the readers who have an English exam in the following day/week as the spelling and grammar may put your preparation at risk. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.*

[The Burning Maze spoilers ahead.]

WARNING: the following chapter may trigger OCD

Percy's P.O.V 

I voke ip nwxt to my bewtifool vife Annabae

Them I reakizsed it was da day fir moi huigbschool reunion

I boke up my fiftween childs Zoe, Bianca, Selina, Luke, Eathen, Charles, Lee, Michael, Javon, Dacota 

"perceus achilldes jacsonnn!! gwt downs heere u lazey piece o schist!!!" my wifey scereamesd from da kitchen and I cud smell bluw pancakeds

I ean doen the stsirs. to aet my feed. 

thrn i got dresswd in mu fanvy outfut. 

Tewn I wajk te da ecxpenzive cer da gawds gave us ans clumb in thewn i reasch mu higheschoeol reaunioan ans thawn Belliandia Bottany hits on moi, da kids cone andmove ker asife

britadny slaops moi ands i hasp ing shcock . thwn anabaeb coimes nd pwncheds herr . 

Shew faals dowen abd deis

i calp happiieeliie nd pikc op moi childs hoo werr naimedd ofter r ded frands.

thewn I weant toa da swian meat. ans thean brittiany buyrttertcup hitted on me again, thwn Annabae pushwd hwr in da pooal and she dies agaiwn 

thwn niko cam wyle macing ouut wid hs hott gf tuna mune

awn thewir thwee kidwds Bianca Bianca and Bianca comw

i ylled "trpal bianca supremacky!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" nd will camer krying and uswdd hes plageu powars nd killeds hs neigbir karen

And thewn Nico kissedd will than Karean shoutes yoe homos gettt off my lawwn 

then Wuna Woon the aouthor shoutted dat onky gumpy ole mon sey gett off moi lawwn

thren kaeren flisppfd a rudde gestur nds i punchsed hr inti oblivoin  

nd thqwn bran da bulli caim nd panchsd moi. rwdee!!!!! >:((( 

bcoz I is a demipod, i have a flashbac 

I see bianca di angleo (da forst one, idots) hnading me da hdaes figurien nd yeling"NAIM UR CHILD AFTER MOIII PERCY!!!!!!!!! OK LUV U GOTTA GO DYE  A PANFUL DEDTH!!!!!!!!!" 

da sene changde toa zoey stratrign at da stairs, shee grippesd moi rist nd sweezed it, sayinfsd "DONUT NAEM UR CHILDS AFTERE MOI PERCYUS. ITSD TWO CLISCHEE- I-I can see the stars m'lady-" ands truned inta a pwetty consellatoe.

da sene changde toa leaf letcheer teligsn me etoe name mie doggo aftered hum but i awsa nota donig dat. i aws obv namingd moi childs ufter hims!!!!!!!!!!!!!

da sene changde toa charlsi bfore he went boom. hed yeleld "NAMY UR CHILDS AFTER MEH OK PERCRE?? ANDSA TELSL MOI WEHN U ND ANABAE DO DA DIRTY ;)" 

da sene changde toa michel telligns me he wass acytauaky ferrertt boi drako in dsiuguise and to nake ma oet ferrettt ufter hemm , butt i is nameng moi childs dat muahahahahaha. den he fill off da bridgde.

da sene changde toa Selwena hoo was dwing, shea siad "Name yr kid agtre moi Percwy ok seeya in da underwardls wid charly wen u dye!! twlels aclrisse dat wee wereee achilsde ands partodclus!!".

da sene changde toa eathean, da swoad killled hem bat before he siead nameee childs sfter hem aend diwed

da sene changde toa annaberer sc!%^&*miNG. "I THOUT YOU WARE FAM!!!!!!!!" anabay yleld, sovving. "DOMM TORRETTO ISS BETTAR THWN U >:((((" "sorrye annabeat, i'm asdjust a KID NAD LOFE ID A NOGHTMAREEEEEEEE. ven tho im 22 OOH OOH, 22 OH OH OH. oah & Precy, toatlly nom ur childs dfter moi, sincece i berterayed da camppp :D" 

"hEy man," javocado saisds, "if ai everr dye, nom ur kiddos ofter moi, okie bro?" "UR GOSDNSDA DEIII BRO?? I YELEWD. "Nu nu, iam javdoan gracdxie, i cant; diew bro" hes saxd end kisded meh on da foereheadd "taek care vro" ands he dfelft withe pipecleaaksjf two findish hi skool.

dacotaaa sipped cool aed as ai wast levigndz fer cemp haf bolloood "HASDDSDAWEFSKDFEYGSHASHENMHDBGVHGFFDSFDS" he saisda. obv hie wast teling moi tp nam moi childs dfter hidms . i leftr, smiyling et hem!

snd den i eoke op amd den mu kiads killllllleded bulle

DA END