Rogue
Chapter Three

August 14th, 1976

After staying a few days at Mary's, Sirius had decided it was more than enough time to confront his best friend with the unpleasant news.

It was time to explain how he had managed to denounce his name, inheritance and somehow shed his old identity all in the span of hours.

It was the right choice but it had definitely been a difficult one.

Mary hadn't probed him about his confession a couple nights prior which he was thankful for. He wasn't ready to tell her what he had done.

Sirius didn't think he trusted her enough to let her see the parts of him that were much more than just vulnerable. If he told her, he wouldn't be able to keep her at arms length.

The plan was to keep her far away, not close.

As he slowly munched on the food Tiky, the Mcdonald's house elf, had given him, he thought about his options.

Tiky knew Sirius quite well. She always prepared his favourite types of food whenever she saw him.

"Thanks, Tiky," Sirius said with a wide smile. Kreacher wasn't half as nice as Tiky by far but he had his own charm about him.

A familiar air about him that meant Sirius could never forget him, even if he never saw Grimmauld Place again.

There was a pang in his heart but he squished it down.

He only really loved Regulus and he was sure his brother wouldn't reject him but for now, he had to lay low.

Sirius was coming back for him.

That was a promise.

"Is your father home today?" Sirius asked, having only really bidding his time so he could floo to the Potter's.

With a smirk, Mary shook her head.

"You don't have to leave," She said, batting her eyelashes.

On the second day of staying, Mary's resolve had obviously crumbled and she had tried to seduce him but to no avail, Sirius had stayed strong.

There was a reason he had ended it.

Their affair had gone on far too long.

He was breaking free from anything that tied him to the pure blood society. He was going to do life as just Sirius, not with the Black name attached to him.

He was going to be a new man, a much better one than those that have come before him.

The decision had already been made inside of his mind.

"I'm sorry, Mcdonald but I meant what I said that day," he started his goodbye, but he intended for it to be a clear message.

Her lower lip began trembling, she knew what this was.

The final break up.

There would be no more Mary and Sirius, even if it was only between the two of them. This was what Sirius wanted but he knew she cared for him despite his warnings for her not to get too attached.

It was only supposed to be fun but it had ended up being two year's worth of fun.

"This has to end and you know it."

"We'll be on again soon, like always," Mary said as she widened her eyes, but the words felt hollow on her dry lips.

"No, not this time. Things are different now. I'm different."

"No you're not. You're still the same toerag as always!" Mary suddenly esclaimed, her voice a little louder this time as she stood up.

She began walking to her living room where the mantel piece on the fireplace bore a family portrait of her and her parents.

He followed her closely behind.

The McDonald's looked happy and they really were.

It disgusted Sirius a little, or maybe he just envied her because he couldn't have had it both ways like she could.

Things really had changed - she used to make his heart beat faster and when they touched, he would get goosebumps.

But every time she touched him now, his skin would begin crawling like a bad rash begging to be itched.

Sirius gritted his teeth, trying to find the right words. He wanted to tread nicely around her feelings but still make the message evident.

He didn't know whether he could watch pretty Mary Mcdonald cry.

The right words had to fix everything, he was sure of it. He just had to explain why he needed to go rogue for a while, maybe even forever.

"It meant something to me, don't get me wrong. We had fun, Mary. But fun isn't a forever thing, you know that."

Mary shook her head, her messy blonde hair shaking around her. Her blue eyes were wide and teary.

"It's time we both move on. You deserve a real relationship or even better now you can focus on your Auror dreams and not have me getting in the way anymore."

He reached out, putting his left hand on her shoulder and his right hand tilted her head to look up at him.

His grey eyes looked down at her with honesty. He didn't mean to be a jerk, but at least he could admit it and finally do what was right for Mary.

"You are a good friend, Mcdonald. Let me repay you by releasing you," He offered, placing a kiss on her cheek.

Her eyebrows knitted in confusion.

"You were never holding me as a prisoner, Black. I am my own woman. I can have fun with the Gryffindor bad boy and not get attached," she said, her voice breaking just a little at the end.

She had almost fooled him with her facade of confidence. She was good at playing tough but Sirius could see straight through her.

Mary had always been an open book to him, even if she wished she wasn't at times.

"I stayed through all the times you ignored me or shut me out," the blonde girl mumbled, tearfully.

"When you belittled me, devalued me by using me whenever you pleased. I stayed...I watched every other girl you made feel special just like me," She cried a little before hiccuping.

"I was the perfectly, unattached toy that you played with for a while before I stopped being interesting."

Her deductions weren't full of anger, albeit mostly true, but were sorrowful and regretful.

Just like every other girl of Hogwarts; she had just become another notch on his belt.

Both parties were painfully aware of that truth too.

Sirius opened his mouth to say something - anything but nothing was going to fix the mess he had made of Mary Mcdonald.

"Just... Just get out, Black. Let you be Potter's problem now," She finally spoke up, looking straight at him but it seemed almost like she wasn't really focused on him.

Mary was a little shaken up but he knew she was strong enough to pull herself back together. She'd be good as new in five minutes - or at least, picture perfect as expected.

Licking his parched lips, he grabbed some of the floo powder before stepping into the fireplace.

He felt regret but it felt hard to communicate through the disaster he had caused.

"I'm sorry Mary, but it's better this way because I will only get you killed in the end," Sirius stated, for he felt like a mad man on a suicide mission to defy his family at all costs.

His plan was surely going to kill him and maybe James too, but he had to keep Mary as far away from him as possible.

She would already be a target if she became an Auror - he didn't want nor need to make her a bigger one.

His words felt lost on Mary but he wasn't going to risk the chance of her replying or deciphering his message.

"Potter Manor!"

His scream echoed across the elegant room as he dropped the powder as the green flames sparked and he was gone with a flash, leaving Mary dazed and confused in his wake.

•••

Please comment/vote if you enjoyed this chapter.

All the action is coming very shortly! I'm very excited to see how you all react to the way I've changed the timeline!

Let me know if you spot any errors or any sentences that confuse you!

- ECX.