Christine jerked awake, her head groggy, her heart beating wildly. There was something wrong, something that had snapped her out of an uneasy sleep. And after a few moments, she realized what it was.

The baby was crying. Why was the baby crying? Why wasn't anyone doing anything about it? The sound tore through her, like a signal of imminent danger.

Hardly thinking, she got out of bed and stumbled down the hall to the nursery. The room was still bathed in the soft orange light. Inside the crib, the little girl was screaming and kicking her tiny legs in the air.

"No, no, no," Christine whispered, rushing over and picking her up. "Don't cry." She shushed her and started rocking her.

The baby's cries faded as she glanced up at Christine with curious eyes. A sense of peace and accomplishment filled her chest as she continued shushing and clicking her tongue. She wasn't exactly sure why she was doing it, but it seemed to work. The baby smiled and reached out her chubby hands.

Christine let her grab her finger, shocked by how soft and warm the tiny human was, by how she seemed to fit perfectly in her arms. Her head was covered in silky blonde curls, but she had Sam's green eyes. The chubby cheeks, tiny nose and full lips made her look like a miniature princess. She was adorable, from her look to her smell. Christine had never wanted to squeeze something into a giant hug before.

It hurt. Her chest hurt and there was a weird flutter in her stomach which she usually associated with positive nerves. It all stemmed from this little girl and a sudden and all-consuming need to protect her, make her laugh. Christine wasn't even sure she'd ever held a baby before. It was magical. Was this what new mothers felt like? Probably not, since the baby would be much smaller.

An unexpected and inexplicable ache settled within Christine's heart at the thought that she'd missed months of the baby's life.

"Wha--?" Sam appeared in the doorway, his hair rumpled, looking half-asleep, wearing shorts and a t-shirt very similar to hers. He held a bottle of formula. "Christine?"

"Sorry," she whispered. "She was crying and I couldn't leave her like that."

"Should've warned you. I usually take her down with me while I prepare her food, but I was too dizzy and I was afraid I'd drop her." He stepped inside the room, reaching out his arms.

Christine held the little girl tighter against her. Sam faltered, rightfully unnerved that he was being refused his own baby. But he couldn't know that the thought of handing her over made Christine almost want to cry. 

So she did the next best thing. "Can I feed her?"

Sam tilted his head. "Um, really? Sure?" His eyes drifted towards the baby who was making grabs for Christine's hair. "She seems to like you, anyway."

Christine eased down into the rocking chair, for the first time realizing the obvious reason it was there and waited. Sam passed her the bottle and she presented it to the baby. She took it greedily and started suckling, her fists propped against the bottle.

"What's her name?" she asked, realizing what a blasphemy it was that she didn't already know.

"Sammy. I mean Samantha. But we obviously call her Sammy."

Christine quirked an eyebrow, looking at Sam. "Really?"

"It was Skye's idea," he said with an eye roll. "Said she'd always loved the name and that it's only a coincidence I'm called basically the same. Her middle name is Amelia, like her mother's, though."

"To even the scales," she said with a nod.

"I guess. I was stubborn about it. Hold her head a bit higher."

She complied, making sure Sammy was comfortable. The name seemed to fit her since she was a little piece of Sam. And, after all, she'd always liked the name Samantha as well. Not like it mattered what she liked, but still. As she watched the little girl it was so obvious and yet impossible to believe that she was Sam's, that he had a child. But she couldn't even dream of letting the baby go.

"You don't have to do this, you know," he said. "It's three in the morning."

"That's okay. I just... You know, it's hard to let her go once you've picked her up."

Sam smiled. "Trust me, I know."

Christine smiled back, then focused on Sammy. She was adorable and soft, so easy to fall in love with. What shocked Christine a little was that she'd never even considered if she liked children or not. She hadn't had the chance to be around many. And yet, this little girl... Every second she held her in her arms felt like heaven.

Unfortunately, she was done eating a lot faster than Christine expected. The disappointment she felt at having to let go of the baby was overshadowed by a sense of accomplishment like she'd never felt before. The mere act of holding Sammy warmed her to the core, completed her in ways nothing else ever had. What the hell is wrong with me? She hadn't even considered if she wanted kids or not, but now... "Do I put her to bed now or what?"

"You still have a lot to learn about babies." Sam took her from Christine's arms, which suddenly felt empty and lacking purpose, and started patting her back. "After she eats, she needs burped. Then you have to change her diaper."

Christine watched him, a different kind of warmth seeping through her. She looked away and huffed. "Ugh, not sure I'm ready for that."

"No one ever is," he said with a short laugh. "You can go to bed."

That sounded even harder than letting Sammy go. "Is it okay if I stay and watch, though?"

He shook his head, and she just sat there, rocking back and forth in the chair while he pat Sammy's back until she let out a tiny burp, then proceeded to change her diaper. She was already yawning, the most adorable sound.

And Sam... The way the nightlight made his skin glow, the way he moved with infinite grace while handling something so fragile... It was so stupid, but she didn't think she'd ever found him more attractive than right then, while he was performing such a mundane task. To her inexperienced eyes, he was a marvelous father.

"You're really good at this," Christine observed, trying not to focus on how intimate this entire experience felt for her.

"I have been practicing for over five months. It would be sad if I wasn't."

"Fair enough." She nibbled on her lower lip. 

Even if she'd decided to leave Sam alone after this one night, now, after Skye's letter, after holding Sammy and feeding her, it felt impossible. And what shocked her was that it wasn't just about Sammy either. She needed to know that Sam was well, that he would be happy. That she could make him happy.

Why? What's wrong with me? But as she watched him putting Sammy back in the crib and rubbing her back, she couldn't fathom how anything could be wrong. It would be crazy not to want to be a part of this. And not as a continuation of what once was, but as something new, clean and exciting. She wanted this more than she'd ever wanted anything in her life.

But she wouldn't force her presence on Sam, she wouldn't butt into his life, and most of all, she would never let him know how much she still longed for him. This wasn't about being with him, being a couple. This was about helping him get better.

"Is it okay if I do this again?" Her voice was barely louder than a whisper.

He turned to her, his eyebrows raised. "What? Wake up at three a.m. to feed my baby?"

Yes, that. Or whatever else he allowed. "Not necessarily. Just... Maybe help you out with her from time to time?"

She could see the doubt in his eyes, the calculation, the fact that he was too tired to think properly and analyze all the implications of her offer. What he surely couldn't guess was that she didn't want anything from him. And it wasn't all about him either. In the span of just five minutes, she'd fallen in love with that tiny baby.

Finally, he gave her a small, exhausted smile. "Sure, if you want to. Sammy seems to like you."

Christine smiled back, trying to hide how her heart grew. He hadn't thrown her out of his life, and it was enough at the moment. So she stood, squeezed his shoulder, and left for her room, burying the need to hold him. That was not why she was doing this.

🏯

Sam tried to battle the frustration raging inside of him because he knew Sammy would pick up on his mood and start fussing. But it was hard to control, so he made up for it by bouncing her harder. She giggled.

"So no news yet," he said, keeping his voice as friendly as possible.

Kyle shook his head, and it was obvious that he was also doing his best not to swear up and down the room. "Nope. No improvement after that one time. And I'm so frustrated. I mean, we were right there."

"I think you did the right thing. Jessie made a persuasive argument. You weren't ready and we really need to plan this properly. Too much is at stake."

"Let me hold Sammy," Kay said, getting off her chair and taking the baby from Sam. "I could feed her and let you two talk."

Sam tilted his head, a little confused that Kay would actually sit out on the action to babysit.

"We discussed the subject so much, it's beyond dry," she said, noticing Sam's glance. Then she focused on cooing to Sammy who reached out a chubby hand and caught a lock of Kay's hair. "Ouch. Who would've believed babies are so strong?"

Sam laughed. "I know what you mean. She has an enviable death grip."

Kay didn't seem bothered though, a serene smile on her face as she slid her index finger down Sammy's cheek. She looked so entranced by the baby, maybe more than ever. He turned a questioning glance to Kyle, but his brother was busy drinking Kay in, so much longing on his face, Sam actually felt bad.

They were obviously ready for kids of their own and this thing with Jimmy had disrupted their plans for over a year. It couldn't be easy. But Sam couldn't stand the thought of more misery, so he threw the best distraction he had at them.

"If you want to stay for the conversation, you can," he said. "Christine's coming over tonight and she can take over."

Kyle's attention was successfully thwarted and there was nothing serene about the look he gave Sam. "Christine?"

Sam bit his lower lip. He'd avoided bringing her up until now because even he wasn't exactly sure what he was doing. But he had to admit it had been going on for quite some time, and there was no point denying it. Her presence in his life was not temporary and he enjoyed her company.

"Yeah. She's been helping me with Sammy for the past two weeks." Almost daily actually, and not once had she said a word or made an out of place gesture to hint that she had ulterior motives for her presence.

"How come?" Kay's eyes were wide with shock and she'd stopped rocking Sammy. She expressed her displeasure with a tug on Kay's hair and she started bouncing up and down again.

"You guys know she stopped by at the funeral. She was cold and I gave her my jacket. Then she was gone." Sam shrugged. "Two months later, she suddenly turned up to return the jacket and sort of... Fell in love with Sammy."

"Can't blame her," Kay mumbled. "But I never imagined Christine would like kids."

"Yeah, me neither. But as it turns out, she's actually great with Sammy." 

Which he found both weird and endearing. It made Christine so much more human. He was spared further explanations by the doorbell. He considered telling Kyle and Kay to cut Christine some slack, but nixed the idea. They were all grownups and he wasn't about to tell people how to feel or behave.

The moment he opened the door, Christine stepped in, a little red in the face and out of breath.

"I'm so sorry I'm late, but this woman would just not make up her mind about the shade of lipstick she wanted, so I had to redo it a million times."

"That's okay, Christine," Sam said, trying not to sound too amused, but the idea of a lipstick emergency was laughable.

"Did you feed her already?" She rushed into the kitchen, but froze once she noticed they weren't alone. "Oh, hi guys."

"Hi, Christine," Kay said, while Kyle just gave her a lazy wave and a half-smile.

"I didn't even get to make the formula," Sam interjected.

Christine took this as her chance to escape the awkward silence and hurried to put water on the stove. "Everything okay with you guys?" she asked, not looking anyone in the eye.

"Yeah,  we're good," Kyle answered, sounding amused for some reason. 

Maybe because he enjoyed seeing Christine uncomfortable. Sam was a little surprised he found that mean. He knew exactly why Kyle would want to torment Christine just a little and it was more than justified. Tom would've been much worse.

"Still not married, though, if that's what you're wondering," Kay added, bouncing a giggling Sammy.

"I sort of figured. Sam told me about Jimmy. Since you guys have such a special relationship..." Christine hesitated as she put formula over the warm water. When she turned to them, shaking the bottle, there was hope in her eyes. "I was thinking. When you do get married, I'd love to do your makeup, Kay."

"Oh." Kay seemed a little taken aback by Christine's desire to bond over makeup. "That's a nice thought."

"I have just the thing for your eyes that would really make the color stand out. And when you start applying makeup to a million faces, you really start longing for someone beautiful to work with." She reached out her arms. "Can I have Sammy?"

Kay looked both confused and reluctant to let the baby go, so Sam took it as his cue to interfere. "Why don't you go up together?"

"Okay..." Kay didn't sound convinced, but she and Christine made their way upstairs to the nursery.

Finally alone with his brother, Sam turned to Kyle. "Okay, honest truth, how weird is this?"

Kyle hummed and drummed his fingers on his chin. "Not as weird as I thought it would be before seeing her. She does seem changed. The annoying swagger is gone."

"I know. And she seems to adore Sammy."

"Also true." Kyle let out a sigh. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but maybe she did learn something from everything that happened and is actively trying to better herself."

"So you don't detect anything false about her?"

Kyle shook his head. "At least not yet. But Sam, I think you can handle this. You're much better off, she has no chance in hell to fool you and... If you enjoy her company, then why not? You're a big boy."

Sam stared. "Why not what?"

Kyle frowned. "Wait. I thought you meant..." He pursed his lips, looking somewhere between amused and confused.

"You thought I meant what?"

"What's she really doing here?"

"Helping me with Sammy, as I mentioned before."

"Literally. As in no code word?"

"Jesus, Kyle, I'm not sleeping with her! Skye just died for fuck's sake!"

Kyle covered his mouth most likely to hide laughter. Sam had no idea why this was amusing to him. "I'm sorry. Then yes, it is weird."

"Why is it weird?"

"Because it's Christine and her not wanting something in return for helping you is a little hard to believe. Also, Sammy doesn't seem to be the only one she adores."

Sam wanted to retort with something snarky, argue that Christine made absolutely no pass, however subtle, at him, but realized something else. "Wait, you wouldn't have judged me if I was sleeping with her?"

Kyle shook his head, all traces of amusement gone. "Grief is an ugly thing, Sam. I mean I sure as hell can't pretend to know how you're feeling, but I've seen people crash and burn for a lot less, me included. So no, I wouldn't judge you. I just want you to be happy."

A painful knot lodged itself in Sam's throat and he felt the need to hug his brother. The only thing that stopped him was how Kyle's gaze had moved over his shoulder and a his eyebrows drew together.

"Turn that up," he said.

Sam glanced at the TV which was running on mute in the background and the pain and confusion morphed into anger. He'd left it on a news channel which was now covering Von Crooken's release from jail. He dove for the remote and turned it up.

"That's right," Von Crooken was saying, his tone filled with venom. "They have no evidence I was involved in anything. Just some false footage. Our justice system is laughable and I will make sure the ones responsible for this will pay." He looked directly at the camera as he said this, and Sam had a horrible feeling he was addressing them directly.

"Nicholas Harkin has been kept under arrest for the past year as the state made their case against him," the voice-over said as they showed images of Von Crooken climbing in a limo. "Today it was decided that there is no further reason to hold him."

"Oh, fuck him," Kyle mumbled. "It was good while it lasted."

Sam agreed. What freaked him out a little were all the white hairs in Von Crooken's goatee, the fierce look and the obvious hatred on his face. He knew who was behind the arrest. Or at least he should know.

"What's going on?" Kay came down the stairs, her face set in worry, luckily sans baby.

"They let Von Crooken out," Kyle growled.

"Shit," she muttered, turning from the TV to them. "What does this mean?"

Like a divine answer, Sam's phone started ringing. He wasn't surprised at all to see it was the Agency emergency line, the one which always let them know when there was an attack.

"Apparently that break time is over."

He answered and it was immediately confirmed. There was a hostage situation downtown and the perpetrators were asking for them personally. He hadn't missed this at all.

"Yes, understood, we'll be right there." He hung up and turned to Kay. "Could you please stay here with Christine until I come back? Make sure Sammy's safe?"

Kay bit her lip, obviously not liking the situation, but she could read between the lines. This could be a trap, a way to get him away from the house and mess with his family. And Kay was not going to let that happen.

"Sure. Don't worry about it. We'll look after Sammy. You... Just be careful." And she moved to Kyle's arms and pressed a kiss to his lips. "I mean it. No unnecessary risks."

He nodded once, then grabbed his jacket. "Let's get this over with."

🏯

For a moment, Sam had thought their lack of training would be a problem. As it turned out, it was so deeply ingrained into their DNA, it was easy to remember how to fight, how to plan, how to shoot. Yes, they did need to go back to training, but for the night, they'd handled themselves well. No senseless destruction, no collateral casualties.

Tom, Kyle and Jerry all fidgeted as they waited for Herrison in one of the Agency briefing rooms. Jerry seemed the most uncomfortable, his eyes forever drifting towards the cameras.

Sam was distracted by something else. How it was only the four of them answering the distress call and handling the potential damage. Sure, they'd left Kay behind, but it was still only five of them. Jimmy and Jessie were thousands of miles away, and who even knew where Angie was?

It was weird to be back in the Agency building as well. It had never closed off for them, but Herrison had made good on his promise and they hadn't been bothered or contacted after the whole space debacle. The only Agency staff he'd seen was the medical one in California.

Finally, Herrison entered the room. Sam hadn't seen him in months, ever since his wedding, and he looked surprisingly older. The hair on his temples was completely grey and he'd grown a graying beard to accompany his usual brown mustache.

"Hello everyone." Even his voice sounded more grainy. "Nice to see you. Though I do wish it was in different circumstances."

"Hi, Herrison," they all answered with various levels of impatience.

"Nice to see you, too," Kyle continued. "We'll catch up, but right now how obvious is it that this is a direct consequence of Von Crooken basically threatening us on TV?"

"It's fortunately obvious to everyone," Herrison said unexpectedly. "Which leads me to my next point. It was finally agreed at the highest levels of the Agency that everything you've done last year was correct and justified. After Von Crooken's arrest, Snitch Gravel's entire dealings paralyzed. There were no more important transactions, no more aggressive recruitment of scum from the underworld, and even a few of his regular employees were arrested."

"Cool," Tom said, crossing his arms over his chest as though detecting this would end in no way good for them. The Agency had funny ways to show their appreciation. "Do we get a medal?"

"Worse," Herrison said with a barely hidden cringe. "They want you back full time. I've negotiated inactive status for you so far, but now..."

"We figured we couldn't go fully inactive until this jewel business is done," Jerry said, sounding unexpectedly understanding. "And until Snitch Gravel is brought down one way or another."

Herrison looked a little shocked, but he nodded. "Yes, well, they want you back in action. And it's because of your trip to Egypt as well. It was a good call, and we believe it's a step in the right direction. There are only two jewels left."

Sam wanted to point out that he had a ton of things going on in his life and that he hadn't slept more than four tied hours in months, but he was sure that even if Herrison might care, the Agency wouldn't. Christine being in his life was suddenly a stroke of luck.

"We'll need to start training again," he said as an afterthought. Because one thing was clear. Agency or not, Von Crooken would not let them rest. Unless Snitch Gravel stopped him, but Sam seriously doubted that and wasn't taking any chances.

"Tom and I will be on call if something goes down," Kyle said. "Jerry will be first backup and Sam second backup."

Sam wanted to open his mind and protest, but Jerry cut him off. "You're a single parent, Sam. Sammy might need you alive."

Right, true. He gritted his teeth and nodded.

"Seeing the current situation, I was wondering if you'd like to train new recruits," Herrison said, addressing Kyle. "William is in charge of that for now, but I thought you might be interested."

Kyle just nodded, and Sam tuned the goodbye part out. They did need backup, and leave it to Kyle to tell scum apart from people with potential. Plus Sam didn't really want to get involved for some reason. A mere year ago, he'd have been all over this.

But that was before Jimmy, before Sammy, and right not he just wanted his peaceful life back, even if it was a lie. So he was more than glad when they said goodbye and he headed back home.

Christine and Kay were calm because Kyle had obviously informed them that everything had gone smoothly. Kay was more than happy to wish them goodnight and head home with Kyle. Christine however lingered a little longer, shifting her weight from one foot to the other as if she didn't want to leave.

Sam was half-tempted to ask her to stay over again, but after his conversation with Kyle, he wasn't sure that was appropriate. Plus, he kept looking for signs of the adoration Kyle had mentioned, which was a bad idea.

"What is it?" he asked instead and was grateful that his voice came out perfectly nice and not accusing.

"I didn't miss this," she said, her voice low and vicious. "I didn't miss this at all."

"What?"

She raised her face and stared him straight in the eyes. "Worrying about you. Knowing you're in danger."

He let out an exhausted laugh. "This was nothing. They're rusty, too."

"This time. But what about next time?"

"You don't have to worry about me, Christine."

"I know I don't have to." She cut herself off and looked towards the stairs. "But I can't help it."

That was sweet of her. "Thanks for staying with Sammy."

"Any time you need it. And I mean it. Especially if you need to run off. Just give me a call and I'll be here."

The heat in her voice sent a strange tingle through him, one which was familiar and foreign at the same time. He decided against analyzing what it might mean. "Thanks."

She reached out her hand and squeezed his forearm. "I got you. For better or worse. That's a promise."

He had no idea what to say to that, so he just nodded. With a small smile, she leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek, then let herself out and was gone.

The moment the door closed, Sam wished he'd asked her to stay over. He was sure she would've said yes and that he would've enjoyed her company. But then again, it also sounded like a terrible idea.

He placed his hand on his cheek where she'd kissed him, wondering why he could still feel it, why it even mattered. But he couldn't deny that, without him noticing, his life had become much easier to bear with her around. He looked upwards and shook her head.

"Why are you always right?" he mumbled.

The answer came instantly, her voice ringing inside his head. Because I know you, Snowflake. Now go ahead and be happy.

If only it were that easy.

🏯🏯🏯

And here we are! Back in action! And Christine is apparently lingering in the picture. I'm curious how you feel about her.

Also, the break is over and apparently Snitch Gravel (or maybe Von Crooken) decided it's time to start making life hard again. Where am I even going with this?

I guess you just have to read and find out. Hint: It will become pretty obvious in the next two chapters.

Fun fact: The chapter soundtrack was a big inspiration for how I see Christine's change. Even if she and Sam are no longer together, it is now that she becomes someone he can count on. And for once, she finally accepts that she's not the center of the universe.

Thanks for reading and don't forget to vote and comment if you're enjoying the story. I need to keep my writing stride!