Chapter 38: No Fear Equals No Control

Hiccup

"What are you doing?" I felt my timid voice ask the two boys sat in front of me "What's it to you runt?" the rude words they would always call me used to hurt but since I've had it so many times it doesn't affect me anymore. "Can I join in?" I asked sitting down with them but they just gave me horrified looks and pushed themselves back away from me slightly "Sorry don't think you'd be able to stomach it, it's not your sort of thing," I raised my eyebrow at the two in front of and when I looked out to see what they were doing it appalled me. Where I thought they were playing a game they were doing the complete opposite, out in front of them were multiple drawings of dragons but when you took a closer look at them the drawings contained the dragons looking chained with one another being attacked brutally and the people attacking had smiles covered all over their faces. It was disgusting to see and the enjoyment the two boys found hurt me deeply. "Why would you draw that?! That's horrible!" I screamed at the pair of them "Oh shut up runt, if you don't like what you see move on. No one wants you here anyway," I suddenly ripped away one of the drawings from their pile so I could take a closer look. When I looked at it, I found loads of idea scattered around the page. Some spoke about dragon proof chains and cages, dragon root arrows before I looked back on brutally chained dragons but then my mind started to spin when I noticed what they were doing "What are you planning?" the paper was ripped from my hands as the boys looked back at me.

"That's none of your concern," the younger one spoke back at me "It is my concern because you're going to hurt dragons when father told you not to," suddenly I felt his hands push me hard down into the ground and he held his hands against my throat tightly so I was gasping for air "He is not your father you understand me! And you aren't my brother! You are a worthless runt! You really wanna know what this is, I'll tell you only because you'll be too dead to remember anyway. We're gonna use the dragons and finish what my father should have. Destroy the island of Berk, sell and enslave every dragon we can and you dear Hiccup are gonna do nothing about it," I could start to feel my face heat up just as my throat started to thicken as I tried to talk "You...can't do that...I won't...let...you," he pressed harder into my neck as I choked further feeling my eyes begin to water and cloud over "I can and I will because you won't be-," yet his voice was cut off as my eyes started to darken around the edges "VIGGO LET HIM GO RIGHT THIS INSTANCE!" suddenly the pressure against my throat was released so I could breathe again with my weight being lifted slightly off the ground. I looked up to be led on Aryan's lap as he held his arms around my small figure clutching hold of me tightly away from Viggo as our father glared down at him. I watched as Ryker slowly ravelled all the plans they were creating immediately hiding them away afterwards so Aryan or Alastair wouldn't find them.

"What do you think you were doing?!" Alastair yelled down at his son who contained a strong and formal appearance to his father showing no signs of regret. "Well this is quite a scene; it reminds me of the time I travelled to Zanzibar and witnessed a relationship between father and son..." the man who came from behind Alastair was muttering away at himself "Johann, we don't need that right now," Alastair glared round at him before turning back round to Viggo continuing with agitation and rage towards him. As that was going on, I noticed Ryker slither his way round to the man named Johann handing over the plans which I saw earlier. The two of them shared an evil grin with each other before looking my way noticing I watched their negotiation. Automatically I cried out towards them "Give them back! You can't take those! You can't hurt them I won't let you!" But I had to stop shouting my throat was killing me from Viggo's pressure and through it Aryan had to try and calm me down as I struggled against him. He pulled me against him tightly with comfort but as I peeked out from his chest the man Johann smiled mischievously at me winking in my direction before leaving just as Alastair suddenly instructed him to do. I felt my weight be lifted off the ground as Alastair took me into his arms carrying me out the room. As he started to inspect my neck over his shoulder I watched as Viggo landed his profound glare at me making me feel very uneasy. But I couldn't get his plan out of my head, why would he enslave the dragons? Why would he sell them? Why attack an island called Berk?

I felt my eyes begin to flutter open as daylight would spread across the whole room. I could feel this warm comfort beneath me which made me feel at ease but then suddenly remembering what I dreamt I shot up from the bed rapidly clutching hold of my neck immediately panting in shock. "Hey! Your okay, Hiccup your okay," the sweet angelic voice behind me started to calm down my nerves. My body twisted round to look at them and I saw her vibrant sapphire eyes gaze towards me reassuringly with that hint of worry written through. She let her hand gently hold my arm as I slowly lay back down against her taking deep breaths to get the memory out of my brain. I could feel Astrid run her hand through my hair lightly which put me in a daydream as I was lost in the feeling of closure. I listened to her steady breathing the pump of her heartbeat making me safe and loved. We didn't talk for a while which I was glad about because I felt as if my throat was all clogged up after what I dreamt, it felt as if I were reliving the whole time again which wasn't pleasant. "Thank you..." I broke the silence between us letting my words trail off slightly not really knowing how to end it or whether I should carry on talking. I looked up towards her as she gazed back down at me locking me inside her sapphire eyes tightly. I couldn't move as she stared me down smiling gently towards me...I was mesmerised by her, I didn't want to look away so I was glad for once I was locked in place. "How you feeling?" she asked me kindly keeping her smile in place still running her hand through my hair with her other hand now wrapped around my body protectively. "Better," I tell her the truth; I shifted in my spot slightly so I could feel even more comfortable against her which she didn't mind keeping hold of me tight as I settled tenderly against her.

I could feel my cheeks heat up suddenly causing me to blush faintly so I had to look away from her and I watched as she did the same causing slight tension between the pair of us introducing the awkward silence. "How long have you been here?" I asked starting a new conversation so the awkwardness wouldn't last for long "All night, I wanted to make sure you were okay before I went anywhere," without looking at her I could feel the heat rise through my cheeks further; I wanted to say thank you again but I've said that too many times so it could seem annoying or needy. "I thought you should know Aryan left yesterday. He said he needed to make sure Ashley was okay and protect you from the inside. I'm not sure how that will work but he's going to try," I clutched hold of her tightly showing that I understood where she was coming from but made no sound. I think she got the idea as she leant down and rested her head on top of mine; feeling more warmth emit from her felt like a miracle. Having her here almost felt like a second home for me and I didn't want it to disappear. I wanted to hold this position for eternity because right here, right now I knew I was safe and if I moved the safety could fall away from me I could be vulnerable again. I shook it off, I shouldn't think like that I need to pass this and stand up be stronger than what I've become. At the moment, my life is consumed by fear and the more it consumes me the harder I will have to pull through to the present. But more accurately, the longer I hold onto this fear the easier it will be for them to control me they'll see the fear I contain and use it to their advantage to get me. I was about to drift off back to sleep because these thoughts felt as if they were draining the energy out of my body but the commotion outside caught mine and Astrid's attention. I sat up exchanging a look with her but she just shrugged her shoulders.

We both headed downstairs to see both my parents were stood outside watching everyone race down to the docks. I went and stood by their side while Astrid stood next to me. "What's going on? Why is everyone racing down to the docks?" I asked my mother as she wrapped her arm round me "The trade ships just came in, everyone gets excited when they do," I raised my head at her understanding what she said before carrying on watching everyone race down there "Would you like to go see?" the next question she asked me, I nodded somewhat confidently before heading down in the direction of the docks with Astrid at my side along with my parents behind us. There were multiple ships docked with a load of Vikings venturing aboard them, thankfully they didn't pay attention to me this time instead kept their eyes located on the ships and what was aboard them. Astrid led me towards the far end one where the rest of the riders were including a range of other Vikings. Astrid jumped down into the ship and started looking around whereas I just stood there not sure what I should do so instead I followed her lead and stood with her. "Oh my don't I look handsome today," Astrid and I looked round to see Snotlout gazing at himself in the mirror I had to contain my laughter as did the rest of the riders around "Snotlout you already own five do you need a sixth?" Heather tried breaking her words through from the laughter. Snotlout moaned putting the mirror back down and carried on looking. "What so you pick something you like or might use and trade it for something you already own?" I asked Astrid while she was looking "Yea basically, it happens on nearly every island. You can find some interesting stuff on these trade ships but we always rely on this one because he gets around a lot and finds a lot of interesting things," I raised my head at her as the pair of us carried on looking; I couldn't see anything of interest for me not that there would be any point I have nothing to trade over with, by the looks of things neither did Astrid.

"Find anything son?" I looked up to see my father stood behind me but I just shook my head as he beamed brightly down at me before he carried on looking. I went to go stand with my mother with Astrid while we waited for my father. He soon came over to us booming his voice out to someone "Johann what will you take and trade?" I froze in my spot at hearing the name and I started to feel incredibly tense. Out from behind some of the trade objects came a man, he wore dark black almost hair, wearing multiple coloured clothing with a hat on his head clapping his hand together walking towards us "Oh Stoick, you welcoming me onto your island is trade in itself. I appreciate it every time I come and thank you," he spoke fondly towards my father before his eyes landed on me raising an eyebrow towards me. He scanned me thoroughly for a moment as if trying to suss me out, trying to recognise me like I recognised him but as we stood staring at each other I had flashes come back from the Grimborn compound. It wasn't when I was a kid but when I was sent to do my work or when I came back from work, he was there communicating with Viggo. Sometimes he was there and other times he wasn't but now I recognised him fully and I was alarmed, stiffer and tenser than I was before hand as he raised him hand in my direction "I don't believe we've met, the name's Trader Johann," Stoick looked down at placing his hands on my shoulder "Johann this is Hiccup," he made sure his voice was quiet so none of the other Vikings could hear him as he hadn't introduced me to them at all. "As in...you're son Hiccup?" he questioned my father but keeping locked eye contact with me; my father nodded at the Trader as he went and moved his hand in front of me to shake. I looked at it hesitantly not knowing what to do...so I did nothing.

Instead my hand carved its way through the gaps to find Astrid's hand where I took hold of it immediately holding on as tight as I could where she did the same back. From the corner of my eye I could see her look in my direction looking concerned and confused whereas I stared looking at the trader in front of me. "I'm sorry Johann, he's not used to everything yet," I didn't care at my mother's words as she stood up for the rude reply of ignorance I gave to him. The man shook his head "I completely understand, it was nice to meet you Hiccup," the way he spoke to me so happy and delightful as if he didn't know me threw me off guard and that uneasy feeling started to creep back through. From behind the trader I could see Ruff mouth in my direction or to Astrid "What's going on?" from the corner of my eye I could see Astrid shake her head meaning I just caused suspicion between everyone. At the moment, I didn't care I kept my hand clasped with Astrid's while the trader and my father carried on a conversation. I must look like a statue, I haven't moved in position I haven't let my eye gaze fall off the man in front of me all I could hear was my heart pumping outside of my chest. "Of course Johann stay as long as you need until your rested for your journey ahead," I was pulled out as my father spoke those words, he couldn't be serious? The trader was staying here! On the island! With us! No way was this actually happening right now. "Thank you Stoick, I am grateful for you generosity," Johann answered my father. "Why don't we get some breakfast at the Great Hall?" I heard someone suggest it sounded like Snotlout and I watched as all the other riders agreed following his lead off the ship which left me staring after Johann. "Hiccup? Breakfast? This way," I felt Astrid tugging on my hand as she was trying to get off the ship. I followed her not saying anything but my eyes never left the trader as I walked away and neither did his off mine.

<evening>

I was sat in the Great Hall alone. All day I had people coming up to me asking me questions or rather asking the other riders while I sat there in silence. I wouldn't answer them and sooner than later I found out everyone in the village knew who I was so I felt incredibly awkward. Though that didn't matter to me at the moment, all day my mind was stuck on the trader...Trader Johann...it was starting to haunt me and I think the others were starting to get concerned as I hadn't said anything all day. I knew I said I would push away the fear, I believe I have slightly so what was eating at me was it anger? I couldn't understand how I dreamt what I did and then he showed up here was it a coincidence? I didn't like knowing he was here, back then he worked with Viggo he still is working for Viggo and I'm the only one who knows about it because I've witnessed it. Everyone left one by one earlier today so it left me and Snotlout alone in the Great Hall after dinner, I wished for better company like Astrid but her parent's needed her and I guess Snotlout wasn't so bad. I did tell him to leave though because I wanted some time alone. Now it was late I was the only one left in the Great Hall as everyone else went on home. I was messing around with a little stone that was on the table to distract myself from everything today; it was working strangely so I kept going. "May I sit with you?" I suddenly froze again but this time I made sure it wasn't completely obvious.

I nod slowly while looking up to see Trader Johann stood at the table; he casually took a seat next to me as I carried on messing around with the little stone. "This all must be very new for you," he started having a conversation with me "I guess so," I didn't want to talk with him so maybe if I sounded blunt he would go away and leave me alone. "I couldn't imagine what you would have gone through with the Grimborns, it must have been terrible," and again I repeated myself "I guess so," in my head I was screaming "Please leave! Please leave!" it just wasn't working "On one of my journeys I came into contact with the Grimborns, nasty people. When I was there, there were three little boys. One of them was being scolded by his father because he was bullying his other brother, nasty stuff if you'd ask me," I pushed myself up away from the table for him to suddenly grab hold of arm tightly causing me to tense up in pain and in fright. I guess I was wrong the fear suddenly came creeping back through. "Let me go please," I tried acting casual hoping he would but he didn't instead he did the opposite and hung on even tighter "Let's not play dumb Hiccup, you know who I am and I know who you are," I shook my head at him feeling my heart race trying to explode out of my chest "I don't know what you're talking about," I tried to get free again but he just pulled me back forcing me to sit down back next to him.

Now I was shaking inside I didn't want to show it on the outside but I figured it would soon enough. "So tell me Hiccup, what's your version of the story?" I sat in silence as he stood in front of me with his hands clasped together. I said nothing and didn't look in his direction. All of a sudden I felt my body weaken as I took a blow to the face; I felt my head land on the table harshly. I slowly looked back round at the man stood in front of me as he yelled "Answer me!" I shifted in my position and still said nothing. I meant what I said, I was going to stay strong I wasn't going to let fear control me, I wasn't going to let this man control me. My head lifted up roughly as he grabbed the front of my hair "Answer me or you'll lose a hand as well as that foot of yours," I gulped not enjoying that idea at all; I nodded the best I could and began speaking "I saw plans for dragons and the island of Berk. I told Viggo and Ryker they couldn't do that because Alastair said no dragon was to be harmed. He tackled me, strangled me until Alastair came and tore him away. I watched as Ryker handed the plans over to you while Viggo was being told off by his father," he dropped as soon as I finished smiling "See that wasn't so hard was it?" I looked away from him as he made a blow across my face again "Look at me," I had no choice but to look back. "How did you get out?" I didn't say anything; I wasn't going to rat out Aryan and Ashley not after everything they did for me this I knew for definite. I wouldn't spill a word so again I said nothing.

With another blow to the face and multiple kicks to the stomach I felt my body fall off the seat and onto the cold concrete ground "Don't mess with me boy! How did you get out?" I said no word; I never lifted my head as he enjoyed taking blow after blow against me. I could feel the tears rise inside my eyes and the trickle of warm blood fall down my face. "Viggo...wants me...alive," I choked out coughing blood on the floor. I could feel my weight be lifted off the ground suddenly as Johann clasped both his hands against my throat clutching hold as rough as he could making it difficult for me to breath. "That may be so, but I'm sure he wouldn't mind if I had some fun of mine beforehand. Now tell me how did you get out?" I still said no word instead just kept choking struggling for the air to breathe, kicking and shoving against him with no use of getting anywhere. "Did you have help?" I looked him dead in the eye just as a smile brightened across his face "You did? Who was it? Who helped you get out?" I looked away still choking on my air suddenly seeing the dark creep in but I pushed it back out. I couldn't show I was weak so I kept fighting against him even though I knew there was no way out. "Viggo will get it out of you young man, that I can promise you," as if on cue a sound was heard coming from the outside catching Johann's attention. He glared back at me coming up close tightening his grip against my throat as tight as he possibly could; he leaned up against my ear catching his breath on my skin whispering "One word of this to anyone and I will kill you myself, despite what Viggo wants. Or even better, I'll kill the blonde you've gotten so attached to and when I do I'll make you watch," my eyes ignited in fear when he mentioned Astrid and when he saw it his evil grin brightened knowing he had won this battle against me "I see you understand, good," he slammed me up against the wall as hard as possible before dropping me down to the ground laughing as he hid within the shadows. I could hardly breathe and the pressure to my throat and the crash of my head sent me into darkness. As I did, as everything blurred around me I could see the doors to the Great Hall open in the distance. Then I faded out.