"I'm trying to realize, it's alright to not be fine on your own."

Jeremy Zucker < comethru >

»»————-　　————-««

Dusting a thin layer of blush over her powdered cheeks, Yeseul peers soullessly into her own reflection. 

Despite being able to wear a different work outfit everyday with her subscription in a local wardrobe rental app, her morning routine is mundane. Clad in a high-waist red and black peplum dress, she smacks her peach-colored lips uneventfully. 

Making her way out of the bedroom, she slips one arm comfortably into the brandy-colored Michael Kors satchel by her bed, and resting a raven black coat over the other.

Her living room is quiet today. At this hour, Bomi would usually be munching away on her treats, the sound of food shoving against the stainless steel bowl pleasant to Yeseul's ears. As a vacuum settles within Yeseul's lifeless home, the desolate sentiment guides her out of the door. 

Yeseul glides down three flight of stairs in her ankle-strap Steve Madden heels, all the while keeping a stoic gloom on her face. Outside her villa, the morning sunlight is yellow and brilliant, but all that she sees are the fine dust particles encircling the air. She never understood how people's moods could easily lift by looking at clear skies of blue, or how it could be brought low by misty clouds of grey. Tranquility often embraced her when the rain poured wildly above her roof. Looking up at the luminous source, she places one hand above her brows. The glaring view steers her vision towards a sea of blackness. 

When she reopens her eyes, there lies a faint silhouette from across the street. The tiny form running in her direction grows larger and larger against the beaming sunlight, until it becomes unmistakable.

It's him.

Yeseul remembers his name at the tip of her tongue, after his brief but unforgettable introduction at the eleventh minute. His voice outside the convenience store hinted at a subtle hesitation but determination drove his name forward. The young man, noticeably from out of town, was awkward but discreet. Lending a helping hand out of his way, his warm, selfless, non-Seoul conduct was almost a breath of fresh air. 

Today, the younger man is wrapped in an over-sized black t-shirt and dark-colored sweatpants, the top covering two thirds of his body. For the first time since their ill-fated encounters, he neither has a hat or a cap above his head, revealing his crisp and short hair cut. He appears to be growing out his hair, with the front of his hair falling slightly over the top of his forehead. She gets a better grasp of his slightly tanned features under the morning sunlight, noting his overall boyish but innocent aura in spite of the piercings on both of his ear lobes.

Carrying a cotton laundry bag over his shoulders, the younger man's hurried steps take a slow turn when he picks up on another's presence at the foot of the villa. 

Yeseul feels the heavy weight of his gaze on her, as though taking a little longer than necessary to perceive her true identity. Hiding behind a sharply-dressed woman with full lashes, pink-tinted cheeks and peach-colored lips has always worked in Yeseul's favor.

"... Noonim?"

As soon as the words departed from Jungkook's lips, his knees jerk forward, and his eyes grow large. "I mean to say, uh... good morning, noonim."

Yeseul takes in his boyish demeanor with a hint of lip crack, bending at his unintentional charm. Despite her icy looks, her assertive voice is soft. "Good morning."

Laying her eyes softly over his right hand, Yeseul wonders if he's exerting too much force on it.

Jungkook picks up on her unspoken words, putting down the heavy bag over his shoulders on the ground almost immediately. Casually, he lifts his right hand, wrapped in a new bandage over yesterday's cut. He squeezes his hand into a fist, relaxes it, and squeezes it again. The bandage stays in place and his hand moves freely without restriction. 

He looks up at Yeseul with the most reassuring smile. "It's as good as new now... Thank you, noonim."

With a slight gleaming squint in her eyes, the corner of Yeseul's brows round. Her small lips break into a blink-and-you'll-miss-it smile. She holds herself back from telling him to be careful with the heavy bag he is carrying. "That's a relief, Jungkook-sshi."

The pockets below Jungkook's eyes curve into a slight 'v' as the lines between his nose and the corner of his mouth emerge. Yeseul catches him looking down awkwardly at his feet to hide his widening grin.

She looks away abruptly when his gaze returns on her.

"Thank you for remembering my name."

Jungkook expresses his thoughts with simple words, in a small, quiet voice. Yeseul isn't sure if she's heard anything more heartfelt recently. 

She dismisses the persistent image of his smile against the ray of sunlight.

Straightening her forward-leaning back, Yeseul falls back on the comfort of her shell, reclining to her everyday conduct. The remaining glint in her eyes falls away when she opens her mouth. "Well, I err... have a bus to catch. Have a good day."

Speeding off, Yeseul pulls her eyes away from Jungkook's crestfallen eyes. His textured voice travels smoothly to her ears despite the stretching distance. "See you around, noonim..."

Yeseul tries not to trip over her own heels.

»»————-　　————-««

Once every month, Yeseul appeases her grumbling stomach by visiting her favorite Japanese deep-fried pork cutlet house. The shop, popular among locals, opens only after sundown. It takes her ten minutes to walk there from her villa apartment, a short amount of time spent in comparison to the customers at the waiting line.

Securing a group table at the restaurant is often difficult to do. During its peak hours, patrons typically wait between thirty to sixty minutes. 

This is why Yeseul prefers eating on her own. 

No waiting-in-lines. No exaggerated smiles. No pretentious stories. No fake company.

Most of all, she gets to be herself. 

On a Thursday evening, Yeseul arrives at the shop a little after half-past nine. Having spent several evenings clearing the mess at her office, she is tired of going back to her instant food supper. From the office, she hops on home-bound bus 613, making a foot detour towards the eatery. 

The shop, as usual, is loud and festive. White-collared workers from the neighborhood clink their alcohol glasses together, oblivious to those around them. Yeseul is ushered towards the narrow and slightly dim corner at the snack bar table. In the midst of the thunderous and ear-splitting crowd, Yeseul fades into the dark and quiet corner, liking very much that she's becoming an invisible part of the landscape.

She removes her black coat, placing it above her bag inside the basket next to her stool. From where she sits, her eye view is limited to the a small kitchen window frame. She catches the slick hand movements of the Japanese chef, who puts bread-crumbed pork chops into a hot wok. Her nose twitches at the delightful smell that travels from the kitchen when the golden oil bubbles, and she places her standing elbows on the extended wooden table with a smile.

"Noonim?"

With her chin resting above clasped fingers, Yeseul's upturned cheeks falls at unplanned greeting coming from the customer on her left.

Her heart drops at the thought of potentially giving up a favorite hideout. 

A light and warm chuckle reaches Yeseul's ears, before the sweet voice returns again. "It really is you, noonim."

The hairs on Yeseul's arm tingle when she recalls the awkward cessation of their morning conversation.

Turning her apathetic face towards the younger male, Yeseul's face softens unknowingly when a pair of puffy, smiling eyes greets her. Dressed comfortably in a large white t-shirt, the smile on his mouth is bright, revealing his matching set of white straight teeth and a pair of puffy cheeks.

"Hi, noonim," Jungkook beams, but a shy nod of acknowledgement quickly follows, "It's... nice seeing you here."

With no food on his side of the table, Yeseul deduces that Jungkook likely arrived just minutes before. She doesn't believe her luck, or lack of it. "I... I hadn't expected running into you here..."

"I could say the same," Jungkook beams as he scratches the back of his nape.

First, it was Bomi's escape. Second, it was the attempted robbery. Third, it was the morning outside the villa. Is this run-in going to keep repeating itself? Or is there a mastermind behind all of this? Yeseul narrows her round eyes, shooting a wary glare at her subject. 

"By any chance... are you a stalker?"

The weight of her voice loses momentum towards the end, as though hearing the question just as frivolous. 

Jungkook's dumbfounded silence and innocent large eyes hits her just as hard.

"I'm sorry," Yeseul lowers her head, immediately regretting the way she let her tongue loose. Small talks have never been on friendly terms with her. She distracts herself by arranging her cutlery set clumsily over a piece of paper serviette, "That... That sounded silly. I just..."

"It's a valid question," Jungkook answers purposefully, interjecting his words at the right time, "and I don't take offense to it."

His answer has Yeseul halting her breath. "So... you are?"

Jungkook's pursed lips finally parts at a series of low chuckles. His eyes dances with ingenuity, but after a while, they recover and return to his once earnest, clear eyes. "I apologize on behalf of our many coincidental run-ins. What I meant to say was... a good-looking lady like yourself should be absolutely watchful of stalkers."

"Oh." Yeseul sees red from his simple remark, shame and bashfulness simultaneously spreading on the tip of her ears. 

She pours herself a cup of cold water to cool the swelling heat, mentally vowing not to be the first to ask questions again.

Jungkook chances on the opportunity. "Do you... come here often?"

With pursed lips, Yeseul turns her face towards and away from Jungkook's face in a haste. She notes his shy but genuine question from the nibbling of his lower lip. She senses his effort at conversing. 

After all, they aren't exactly strangers.

They're neighbors.

Neighbors, with a chance of running into each other again.

Shaking her head, both of Yeseul's hands clutch tightly around the circular plastic cup. Her voice is low and her eyes are transfixed on the water. "Not very often. Once a month, at most?"

"Ahh...," Jungkook nods. Rather than delving into her reasons why, he rambles about how he came to know the place. "The owner of the coin laundry told me this is a really famous shop, and that I had to try it no matter what."

"Well, she isn't lying," Yeseul agrees, an unintended curve gracing the edge of her lips. 

A food runner rushes into their corner then, putting down the steaming hot platter on Jungkook's side of the table. "One serving of tonkatsu, please enjoy your meal!"

In the middle of the charcoal-colored plate, a rectangular, golden-brown pork cutlet is fried to perfection with breadcrumb goodness all over. It sits like a deserving champion, next to a generous serving of easy cabbage dill coleslaw and a bowl of steaming miso soup by the side. As Yeseul's eyes hover over the entirety of the tonkatsu set which she has dearly missed, she hadn't realize the audible protest of her stomach. 

"This looks really good." Jungkook chirps in awe of the size of the pork cutlet. Stealing a cautious glance at the older woman beside him, he rolls his cheeks, placing light pressure on the inside of his cheeks. "Noonim... did you order the same dish as well?"

The same dish, which is the bestseller, is Yeseul's personal favorite. She nods her head, eyes still on the dish. "It's a bestseller for a reason..."

Without second thought, Jungkook slides the platter gently across the table, stopping only when the plate is inches away from his neighbor's face. 

"You should probably eat up then," Jungkook shrugs, half-looking away as he generously gives up his food to his famished neighbor, "I tend to eat things in a flash, and it'll be better if you get a head start..."

Lines between her brows, Yeseul looks up at Jungkook, puzzled and bewildered. She doesn't remember the last time she did anything to deserve such kindness. Is this the Southern hospitality that people always talked about?

She stutters. "Uh... I'm not that... hung..."

The returning growl of her stomach betrays her.

"Noonim, the food is getting cold...," Jungkook reasons, unwilling to take no for an answer.

Yeseul alternates her eyes between the food and Jungkook's round, almond eyes. They are sincere and faultless. She blinks, wiping off the wince above her forehead, ultimately surrendering to her whet appetite. "... Thank you."

Picking up her cutlery, she cuts her meat cautiously, as though to lessen the noise of the crunch. With hesitancy, she puts the entire meat on her fork into her mouth. Only a clean and shiny fork reappears. 

Jungkook's eyes follow her with curiosity, causing Yeseul to spit out a cough when she catches his eyes smiling back at her. 

Her stomach is getting bloated from the amount of water she's had to down herself with. 

Hands over his mouth, Jungkook looks away just as his food arrives. He works with the knife passionately, cutting through multiple slices of meat, big and juicy. Landing his fork on a big slice, he blows but briefly on the evidently-steaming piece of meat, and wastes no time to capture it into his open mouth. His jaw movements are exaggerated as he chomps hurriedly on the scorching meat, and his mouth instinctively rounds when he blows out the hot air caving in his mouth. 

Against the backdrop of a packed Japanese restaurant and bar, Yeseul feels like she's watching a live mukbang broadcast.

"He eats well..."

Her mindless utterance slips right into Jungkook's ears. "I'm sorry, noonim, were you saying something?"

Yeseul has been reprimanded countless times by her sister, that a doomed small talk that often begins with thoughtless utterances. Instead of imposing her own thoughts unto him, for the second time, her mind runs in circles in search for a perfect cover-up. With nowhere to look but Jungkook's expectant eyes, her pupils begin to dilate, "Well..."

Jungkook's round eyes doesn't blink as he waits.

Yeseul folds her lower lip inward and unfolds it the next second. Her shoulders lock. Her breath is hitched. And then, a bulb gets lighted. 

"I haven't properly introduced myself, have I? Yeseul... My name is Yeseul."

Jungkook blinks, and he stops chewing. 

Turning her face away from Jungkook's apparent lack of reaction, Yeseul carries on with her meal as though nothing has ever happened. It's her self-defense mechanism kicking in, protecting her from further distress that often comes with her awkward self-introduction. Nothing this evening seems to be going right: she's given away too much of her time rather than working on solving work issues, and now she's also given away her name - the equivalent of her quiet, private life - to her neighbor.

She shrinks in her seat, munching on her food silently. She tells herself that the exit door awaits her if she could only finish her meal...

"--Thank you."

Those are the last two words that Yeseul has expected to depart from Jungkook's mouth. Despite her stone-cold exterior, she looks up at Jungkook.

"Thank you for telling me your name... Yeseul noonim," Jungkook offers her a smile as he pronounces her name slowly, like a child learning to memorize the coolest phrase he's ever heard. 

Yeseul, whose two Hangul letters individually mean 'pretty' (ye) and 'wise' (seul), form the meaning 'a beautiful work of art', when pieced together. She's heard it all her life, and grown dull to its meaning. She also thinks the name absurd for someone like herself.

"Do you usually get off work this late, Yeseul noonim?"

Yeseul pulls her eyes back to her golden brown protein. She hides her chin, sticking it close to the skin of her neck. "Actually... it's early today."

Jungkook's brow flexes in disbelief. "Oh?"

"I left work a little earlier so that I could be here, before the shop is closed...," Yeseul answers in quiet reflection as she sticks her fork into the coleslaw.

Although it doesn't concern him the slightest, Jungkook's facial muscle could not help but contract. The incident from their ill-fated encounter depicted that the night streets of Noksapyeong was relatively unsafe, a breeding ground for criminal nuisance. "Well, I'm uh.. I'm glad you got off early today, noonim."

Yeseul's heels tap rhythmically as she navigates her way through the awkward pause. 

Her mental vow goes out of the window. 

"What about you?" Yeseul breathes, leaving her question up in the air, undecidedly. She hasn't decided if she is asking because of the two-way compulsion to create a conversation, or because she wants to find out his reason behind moving in. 

The nests below Jungkook's eyes are puffy, but the upward creases surrounding it carries exuberance in his gaze. His teeth, square and white, flashes symmetrically under his shadow-cast nose. "What about me?"

"You're not from Seoul...," Yeseul points out the obvious in a warm but unmistakably formal tone.

The phrase leads Jungkook to brush his thumb over the curved pinna of his ears. A touch of his native accent often overrides the intonation of his first-liners, and the natural nasality of his voice doesn't help. At times melodious, Jungkook's accent is undoubtedly thick with southern masculinity. 

"My hometown is actually in Busan."

Yeseul nods. "Are you a... second-year student?"

Jungkook's smile is passing, and he shakes off her assumptions with a firm shaking of his head and faster denial of his waving hands. He speeds up the chewing of his meat to answer her question. "Actually... I'm here in Seoul, for job interviews."

Taking a second and closer look at the young man before her, Yeseul re-examines that his innocent features - bright almond eyes, boyish rogue nose, thin-upper thick-lower nude lips, and overall pale and light complexion - are not without minimal creases and maturity. 

Yeseul begins to understand the reason for his thoughtful manners through their unplanned collision. 

"I see...," Yeseul bobs her head as Jungkook slurps his miso soup nonchalantly. His shoulders must be sitting under a mountain of pressure, like most young unemployed graduates, yet he doesn't fail to put on his shy and self-assured smile.

The sight is refreshing, encouraging almost, to Yeseul who falls prey to the downcast emotive of life's vicious cycle.

She tells him a simple phrase that she didn't get to hear following her graduation. "Jungkook-sshi... Hwaiting."