If you enjoy mystery monster attacks almost every day, Pure Heart Valley is the place for you.

The bright town was adorned with a gigantic, glistening ruby. It was the heart of the valley, no joke intended. It was also the main reason why there's monsters here in the first place.

Squishy little villagers called Sweetypies went about their day oblivious of the next attack on their home. Even the glorious King Snugglemagne was carefree, grapes dropped to his mouth by his servant.

Mao Mao, the certified sheriff of Pure Heart Valley, took on the job to protect the citizens and become a legend. He would be praised for decades to come!

But that flew from his mind as he wrote up a parking ticket for Pinky. Again.

His cat ears twitched as he smacked the ticket on Pinky's magenta-painted truck. "Pinky, didn't I say no parking directly on the parking meter?! The damages came out of my paycheck last time!"

A short pink rhino glared at Mao Mao with a pout. "Paying for parking is stupid! That's why I do it!"

"Well now you have to pay a fine. Hope you're happy."

The sheriff picked up the all too familiar scent of smoke. It burned his nostrils slightly. He dashed away while Pinky yelled some insult involving Mao Mao's puppet fear.

"SLIM PIGGINS! Your obnoxiously huge monster truck is on fire again!"

Slim was bopping his head to whatever music was playing on his earbuds as he laid on the seat.

Mao facepalmed and muttered, "Sweetypies."

He called Badgerclops over so he could put out the fire. His robotic arm turned into a water cannon.

"Being a sheriff is such hard work!" Badgerclops groaned as he stood there waiting until the fire died out.

Slim was now awake and getting a fine from Mao Mao.

"You're a deputy, Badgerclops. I'm the sheriff overseeing these mindless citizens!"

"Hey!" Slim shouted.

Mao planted the paper to Slim's face without a care, sighing heavily. "All in a day's work, I suppose. But it's like the days melt together, 'Clops!"

He looked up at the sky, his frown shifting to a thoughtful smile. It turned to a grin as he pointed his katana at nothing, his mind wandering. "I want something new! Exciting! Something that will lead us on a new adventure, resulting in a high stakes battle, to an enriching lesson for children to attach to and forget about the next day!"

His grin dropped. His katana went back to its sheathe.

"Well word on the street says the Sky Pirates have a new crew member." Badgerclops finished putting out the fire. "We'll see the next time they decide to wreak havoc and steal our meatball subs."

Mao's eyes brightened at the sound of that. A new crew member? If this was true, and they weren't as lacking-of-brain-cells as the rest of the crew, things would finally be refreshing for once!

"I hope the Sweetypies are right for once." The sheriff began heading back to HQ until an object was heard crashing into a fountain.

The said fountain was in the center of the village. From beyond the smoke, the silouette of a car was slightly visible. The car was wedged vertically into the ground, until it, with a loud creak, tipped and slammed to the ground.

The sound of stone breaking and water splashing made Mao Mao's ears twitch. He whipped out his golden weapon, turning around.

"NEW VILLAIN?! SHOW YOURSELF!" Mao drew out the word "yourself" as he bared his teeth. He made a beeline to the car, keeping his distance.

Badgerclops soon caught up with him, arms slack.

"Or maybe it's just some friendly outsiders wanting to say hello?" 'Clops suggested with a frown.

"Like I'll believe that for a second!"

The two paused. Nearby villagers watched, while others left their houses to see the commotion.

The smoke from the impact cleared enough to reveal the car lying on its side. The wheels were still spinning and would take some time before they were stationary.

The door on the driver's side swung open. A dog with a police hat and a suit climbed out while saying some outlandish line.

"Well Max, it appears that the Geek's highly unstable but practical teleportation device worked so well it sent us to a completely different world of unknown, possibly hostile, origins!"

A much shorter rabbity thing jumped out after the dog.

"Ooo fun! Maybe that's the hostility right there!" The rabbit, presumably Max, pointed to the faces of shocked and terrified Sweetypies and the housecat with a sword. Chaos erupted as the former ran aimlessly and screamed.

The dog furrowed his brow as he stared at the scene. "Nice going, your pointy face has shocked those stuffed animals into denial."

Max was practically a shark when you look at his teeth. His grin seemed to grow wider at the sight. The sight of citizens unnecessarily tipping stands over and losing common sense. "Ah, now this is the reaction I expect from the fans! Thank you, thank you!" He bowed a few times.

Mao Mao suddenly tackled Max to the ground, holding the katana close to his throat.

"You must be a rabbit-shark! And that," he shouted as his katana pointed to the dog, "must be a tentacle monster in the disguise of a 6-foot dog!"

"I wish your assumption was even slightly accurate!" Max exclaimed.

The dog held his hands up by his head. "Have no fear, housecat."

Mao thrusted his sword to him. "HOUSECAT?!"

"We're Sam and Max: Freelance Police!"

"Title drop," Max said.

Badgerclops perked up. "Wait, freelance? You mean you aren't under an evil company and you take jobs any time?"

"Yup and yup!" Sam put his hands on his hips.

Mao Mao lowered his sword and backed away from Max, keeping a close eye on him as he got back up.

"Proof of license," Mao demanded.

Max leaped next to Sam so they can both flash their badges. Sam had a legitimate badge while Max had a soda bottle cap.

Mao skimmed over the questionable badge before shrugging. "Close enough." He overheard Badgerclops yelling in a megaphone, telling everyone to calm down. "So otherworldly anthropomorphic animals, eh?"

"More like an otherworldly lagomorph and a mutt," Max said.

"Stop speaking Egyptian!" Mao took a moment and cleared his throat. "Is there any way you can take y'all and your totaled car out of here?"

"Not really," Sam started. "Our arch-nemesis used our genius's teleportation device to send us here for a mysterious reason that we'll find out later on!"

Max was eyeing a few uncomfortable Sweetypies. "On the bright side, Sam lost a few pounds without exercising!"

Sam shot a slight glare at Max before looking at Mao Mao. "I can only assume you and the chubby bear are part of the police force too, since you completely stand out from the stuffed animals."

"Uh that's Badgerclops to y'all." he pinched the bridge of his nose. "But yeah we're like sheriff and deputies n' stuff."

"I'm Mao Mao, and you're in Pure Heart Valley. Those are Sweetypies, and don't be surprised if they climb on top of you, Sam."

"Huh . . . well I could go for a coffee right about now." Sweetypies were already poking at Sam and hugging his legs. "Oh, not there." He backed away from a chicken who was touching his tail.

"Are you talkin' dirty, Sam?!" Max's eyes glistened as he shook a pink porcupine Sweetypie.

"Alright alright!" Mao Mao shook his arms up and down, accidentally hitting his deputy. "Enough shenanigans, I've been bored all day so let's help these two in finding their arch-nemesis and their home."

"Great idea," Sam said. "We can worry about the fines we'll have to pay for our car demolishing that fountain later." His eyebrows raised at the giant Ruby overlooking the entire valley. Even his ears bounced a little. "Holy fish kabobs in the great Cathedral of Notre Dame! That's some impressive architecture!"

"I wonder if architecture tastes good . . . " Max licked his lips. "Ring pop."

"You will do no such thing," Mao glared at Max before turning to Sam. "We'll bring you to our HQ, where we can lay down the facts and help you out."

"Sounds good, Sheriff Mao Mao." Sam didn't notice the smile on Mao's face afterwards. Sam gave him and Badgerclops a thumbs up. "But how will we—"

Mao whistled two notes to call for his aerocycle. It's just what it sounds like—an aerial motorcycle.

"WEE!" Max yelled as he was run over by the aerocycle and launched in the air. He landed in Sam's arms.

"Hop in. Badgerclops, you can get there on your own." Mao went into the driver's seat while Sam and Max hopped on without question.

"Wait what?!" Badgerclops's eye widened as he watched the aerocycle blast away. "Oh man, not again!"

Sam and Max automatically got helmets made just for their head size. Strangely convenient.

They got to HQ and went inside. Sam and Max looked around while Mao Mao went into his office. Compared to the Freelance Police's small office, this place was a mansion. It had the typical rooms you would find in a house (living room, kitchen, bathroom, bedroom, attic), but there was a siren built into a wall of the living room.

Max's ears leaned towards the sound of buzzsaws and other various clanking noises. He dashed to the source and found an entire training dojo. He was sold, to say the least.

"It's settled! We live here now!" Those were his last moments of peace before he charged into the dangerous objects, dodging some but getting sliced by many. He came out on the other side a new person. Bruised and battered.

"Sam . . . why don't we have this . . . it feeds my cravings . . . "

Sam came out from the death trap unscathed so he can pick up Max over his shoulder. He had a small smirk on his face.

"You kill me, little buddy. Now let's get back to Mao Mao."

Mao was spinning in his chair while waiting for them. He stopped instantly and faced his chair forward while Sam and Max entered.

In Mao's office, Sam sat on a chair across from him and the desk. Max was sitting on Sam's shoulder.

Mao noticed Max's disheveled and bruised state. "Uh, what were you two doing?"

"Checking out your maiming arena!" Max exclaimed with his wide grin.

" . . . You mean the dojo."

"Tomato, tomato."

Mao sighed, adjusting a crooked picture frame of him and his mom. "So this Mack Salmon, he sent you and your classy car to the valley?"

"Precisely!" Sam nodded. "Well vaguely precise. He sent us right after saying his usual 'Now I'll finally get back at you for what you've done to me!'" He did a British accent to mimic Mack's voice.

"What did you do to him?"

"Nothing, at least to my recollection."

Max picked something out of his ear and flicked it away. "We probably got brainwashed, which would make sense because I'm not even sure if we were. Which would also make sense because that means everyone's been brainwashed at some point!"

" . . . Uh-huh." Mao took down some notes, excluding what Max said. His green eyes widened as a light switched on in his head. "Perhaps that rumor is true! If Mack Salmon is here, then he's the new crew member of the Sky Pirates! Hahaha, it's all coming together!"

"Sky Pirates?!" Max's teeth seemed to become shinier than normal. "Are you talking about copyright infringers who steal airplane blueprints so they can make paper machetes?"

Mao Mao failed, and will always fail, to comprehend Max's words of wisdom.

"What in the—no! The Sky Pirates-trying to be menacing and dangerous but failing to be." Mao smirked and stood from his chair. "Their crew used to be much larger until Badgerclops and I wrecked their ship, haha."

"Curious," Sam muttered as he fidgeted with his tie. "Mack Salmon furtively teaming up with a bunch of rookie sky villains in a world widely unknown to us seems like it could cause a heap of trouble."

"Listening to you makes me feel like I can't breathe," the sheriff grumbled.

"I get that a lot." Sam smiled a little.

And so, it was settled: the Freelance Police and the Sheriff's Department would wait until the Sky Pirates showed up. The waiting was for the dramatics.

But something felt missing . . .

Ah yes, Adorabat was returning from "skewl." She's the smallest deputy of the Sheriff's Department, just 5 years old. She was currently looking for Mao Mao.

"Mao Mao! Guess what I did! I solved the biggest math problem by slicing the board in . . . " She trailed off as she entered his office.

A dog with human clothes and a naked rabbit-shark? That smelled like trouble.

"MAO MAO, YOU'RE BEING KIDNAPPED! I'LL SAVE YOU!" Adorabat zoomed to Max and in a split second he was screaming in pain. In fact, his grin dropped for a moment.

"OH MY GOD! . . . How old is this kid? A kid this tiny should not have this much jaw strength!" He was instead brimming with joy—not the reaction a normal person would have.

"A Max this tiny should not be rooting for cannibalism every chance he gets," Sam deadpanned.

"Your opinion is invalid, Sam."

"Adorabat," Mao said as he knocked on her head, "I'm fine. Let go of the deranged rabbity thing."

While pouting, the bat let go, perching between Mao Mao's ears. "Aww! But the shark likes my jaw strength!"

Max wiped a tear from his eye. His voice went wobbly; his lip quivered. "I never thought I'd be treated so nicely today."

Sam sighed and shook his head. "Sorry if Max scared you, little one. We're Sam and Max: Freelance Police."

"I think that's enough advertising for today, pal," Max said.

Adorabat gasped, her eyes sparkling and her wings flapping up and down. Mao Mao grunted in annoyance. "New recruits?!"

Mao laughed. "Thank God they're not. You see . . . " He proceeded to explain everything to Adorabat thus far.

She seemed to understand everything. In fact, her excitement grew. It was evident from her wide grin.

"Yay! Another villain to chew up! But why wait? I wanna go find the fishy guy now!"

Sam had stood up and stretched his arms upwards. His instincts told him his belly would rumble in a few minutes. Hopefully he could steal from the fridge.

"Waiting adds to the potential cinematic climax," he said. "Then you can chew him up all you want. It won't be difficult." He chuckled, reminding himself that Mack Salmon was basically a bulky human body with a fish in a bowl as his head. But he forgot to tell the others that.

Adorabat seemed confused, but ultimately accepted this decision.

The sound of Badgerclops panting came into earshot. His closed eye and the rest of his body trudged along the floorboards, as he entered the room and leaned against a wall.

"That was not cool, man!" he said between breaths, refering to Mao Mao. "I . . . had to walk all the way over here! And pass through several staircases!"

"Oh hush," Mao eye rolled as he walked away from his desk, putting Adorabat down on it. "I didn't want our new guests to have a hard time. Besides, you could've just used your arm to get here!"

"Well I didn't feel like it! It's been a rough day!" Badgerclops huffed.

"Silly Badgerclops!" Adorabat giggled and kicked her feet back and forth.

"So while we're waiting, maybe we should"-Sam pointed a thumb backwards-"look around the valley. To get familiar with it."

"And to terrorize the locals!" Max exclaimed while pointing a finger up.

"And to watch you to make sure that doesn't happen," Mao growled.

Sam got up and left the room, followed by everyone except Badgerclops, who was still recovering from his journey. Max looked up at Adorabat as he left.

"So kid, what's your favorite pass time?"

"Eating bugs and beating the tarts out of villains! I'm gonna be a hero!"

"It's 'tar' not 'tarts.' But I enjoy your excitable spirit! I personally like smashing bugs."

" . . . I'm still not sorry for biting you—"

"No need, that was perfect."

Badgerclops was angrily muttering to himself. He soon followed the others to the village.