I lay on my bed, trying to collect my thoughts.

After Serena's panic attack, I've found myself fundamentally reassessing the relationship we share, and what I know about her.

I had a hard enough time dealing with four months in hospital. One look at her scars tells me that she was in one for a lot longer than I was.

Be that as it may, I know next to nothing about her past. She has told me about the house fire, but only in the most basic way.

And what of her family? I still haven't asked Dawn about them; there hasn't been a good opportunity to bring it up.

I don't know where she grew up, or what her old school was like. Nor of her past friends, her wishes and ambitions. Not even her tastes in music, food and movies.... all the little things that I knew about all of my old friends.

...

Just what have I been doing, for all this time I've been with her and Dawn.

In the distance, I hear the bells signalling the end of classes. With any luck, Dawn will soon realise that neither Serena nor I are around, and return to the dormitories.

My mobile phone starts to ring, cutting my thinking short. It quite startles me, as I've rarely been called since coming to Kalos

"Hello, Ash speakin'...." I sigh, "Oh, Ash! I'm glad I found you. You weren't at any of our usual places, so I thought this would be the fastest way to contact ya." Dawn says through the phone.

"I.....Serena and I left class early. S-She has some kind of panic attack..." I still somehow feel guilty.

The line goes silent. If it weren't for the background noise, I would have thought Dawn had hung up on me.

"I understand, meet me at my place" She responds.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After explaining everything to Dawn, we decide to head to Serena's room.

Before we open the door, I feel a hand pull me back.

"Huh?" I turn to Dawn.

"My aunt has fallen gravely ill. I'm afraid I'm going to be heading back to Sinnoh to visit her, and to spend some time with my family." 

"I-Is she all right? When do you leave?" I pout.

"I'm not so sure she's all right, but last I heard she was stable, I'll be leavin' Saturday...." She says.

"Stable.....that's a relief." I smile.

"Yes, but this means I won't be here for Serena's Birthday...." She looks like she wants to cry.

"We'll discuss it in here, she's best off knowing." I smile at Dawn.

Knocking lightly gets us no response, but the door proves to be unlocked, open slightly.

Serena's room is startlingly bare and monotone. there are no decorations on the plain white walls, a plain dark blue blanket, and only a few books, paper, and purely utilitarian items on the shelves.

Serena herself is laying curled up on her bed. She may not be crying now, but her eyes are closed tightly to stop herself, and the tracks left by her tears still sit on her reddened cheeks.

"Hello, Serena. Ash told me about what happened today...are ya all right?" Dawn says.

Serena's eyes open, though only a little.

"I...I'm okay...." She says something.

She tilts her head slightly to look at me, noticing my grimacing before I can hide it.

"Ash.....S-Sorry...f-f-for making you worry.." She stutters badly.

"R-Really...I'm f-fine now..." She closes her eyes tightly.

"I said it before, right? You don't need to be sorry for this." I feel my heartbreak seeing her like this.

Hearing Serena's shuffling, Dawn moves forward and feels out the side of the bed, eventually taking a seat beside her and taking Serena's left hand in both of hers.

"Dawn, if you want me to go..." 

"No! I don't....want that..." Serena blurts out.

Dawn and I are both surprised at Serena's mustering her courage. A half-mumbled "Okay" is all I can give her in reply, and I take her desk chair to sit in/

"My aunt has fallen ill, so I need to return home for a little while..." Dawn closes her eyes.

Concern replaces Serena's remorseful expression.

"Sinnoh, r-right?" Serena says.

"That's right....we'll be going Saturday." Dawn continues.

"S-So you're going away?" She hesitates.

"Only for a week or two. I'll be back before ya know it! And plus Ashy is here, right?" Dawn smiles.

"You bet! I ain't going anywhere" I look at Serena and give her my bright smile.

Serena seems to take only minor comfort in this, but hey, better than nothing.

"I-is your aunt going to be okay?" Serena asks.

"Hopefully..." Dawn sighs.

Silence falls and I decide to break it.

"Anyway, we were thinking that it would be a good idea to have a going-away party for Dawn, and it could double as...yeah.." 

I cut myself off before saying 'Birthday' as that seems to be a trigger.

"S-so just in the school? Just us?" Serena says.

"That's right." Dawn says.

"O...kay. Y-You're only going for a week?" Serena raises an eyebrow.

"One... or two, I promise you it won't be much longer." Dawn smiles.

"O-okay..." 

 ...

"Alrighty then, you look like you need a rest, Serena, so it might be best if we all went back to our rooms for now." I smile.

"Y'know that if you ever want anything, you can always talk to me or Ash, right?" Dawn rubs Serena's hand.

"I understand...Thank you, Dawn....., Ash." She blushes.

"Well then, good night, Serena" Dawn stands up.

"Night" She replies.

I let out a long breath after the door closes behind us. It feels a little like I've been deep underwater, and only now have been able to come up for air.

Once me and Dawn say our goodbyes, we part ways.

As I walk down the quiet hallway, I can't get that image of Serena out of my mind. Huddled and pitiable, lying helpless with tears on her cheeks. I began to think that she was just a normal, if extremely shy, person, by her problems run much deeper.

Trying to take our relationship further than what we share now, when she's so fragile and vulnerable, wouldn't be right. I don't need to be more than her friend in order to protect her, to try and stop anything like this ever happening again.

Serena is precious to me, and that's why I can't take advantage of her.

But even so... there's still that sting I feel when I think that way.

For now, I need to sleep. Tomorrow, hopefully, will be a better day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As I stand outside Serena's door, all I can do is stand and wait, doing my best not to feel anxious.

As the seconds wear on, I begin to think she might be asleep and didn't hear me knocking. The door handle rattles a little before I can raise my hand to knock again, though.

The door opens a sliver, an eye appearing in the gap only just large enough for it to peer through. I'm sure this girl would install a peephole in her dormitory door, if only such a thing was allowed.

I just stand and smile at her. I don't think words would really help here, after all.

Time passes as we look at each other, the only sound being the disembodied gaiety from the ground floor.

The eye moves away. I keep wondering whether she'll let me in or shut me until the door slowly begins to creak open.

The first thing I notice is that Serena's hair is quite damp. She's recently showered, which is even more obvious by the scent of shampoo wafting towards me.

"Why?" 

To my surpise she broke the silence, not me.

"I...I.I...uh....I wanted to see you, Serena" I feel myself blush and I scratch my cheeks.

I want to make up for what I feel I caused, at least partly. I want to try and remove the distance I feel between us since then, and to see her happy.

I wonder.....I wonder if this is how Misty felt when she saw me lying in that sterile, pastel blue hospital bed.

"I uh...I um...I just wanted....to see you" I smile.

She gives a sweet smile and a nod. That was a satisfactory answer for her?

"Um...since you're here..." She says.

"I'd like to...thrash you at a game of chess." I see her give me a confident look.

"Accepted, but you'll only win in your wildest dreams." I give her the confident look back with a fist pump.