So yeah. Style one now! This one is going to be a bit sad (this is Satire by the way. Stereotypical Uke Kyle... I can and I will. These are just things I don't personally like in a story, doesn't mean there isn't some GREAT fanficion with it. )
Warnings: Smut, violence, homophobia, and cursing.
Ages: 16 both.
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Kyle's POV.

"I use to be good friends with Stan but then he went and stabbed me in the back," I tell Nichole, drinking at my coffee.

"Yeah, Stan is such a fucking asshole nowadays," Nichole says.

"I can't believe this would happen with him. Homophobic, back stabbing fucker," I say.

She nods.

"It's really sad how much of an asshole he has become," she says.

~Ya know your pan hates it when Stan is mean. Also, time skip.~

"Hey! Kyle!" Stan yells.

I try to get away from him and his friend, getting away as fucking quick as possible.

"Hi Kyle," Leo says.

I sit next to him and Kenny.

"Hey! Fag!" Cartman yells over to us.

It hurts to be called that.

"Oh noo, is the faggot sad now?" He asks.

I close my eyes.

"Kill yourself you fucking Jew!" Cartman says.

I really should.

~Making Kyle suicidal? I'm guilty as charged. Well, anyway, let's skip on.~

"Kyle," Cartman says.

The teacher, for some reason, has left the classroom.

"Y-Yeah?" I ask.

He jumps on me and I, without any strength, really can't hold up against him. He keeps hitting me over and over.

"Hey!" Stan says.

He takes Cartman off of me.

"What?" Cartman asks.

I look up at Stan, who helps me up.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I ask.

I look away from him, hurt.

"Hey... I'm really sorry for what I've done," Stan says.

He puts a hand on my shoulder. I close my eyes, taking a deep breath.

"I forgive you," I say, looking at him.

Maybe I can love him like I use to.

~Time skip because you know ya Pan is on a mission to make it as much satire as possible.~

"Hey Kyle," Stan says.

I feel my heart jump from my chest... figuratively of course.

"You're late," I say.

"Dude, I tried," he says.

He smirks.

"Plus you waited but me just fine," he says.

"I-I wasn't going to wait any longer. Fucking idiot. Geez, how fucking delusional are you," I say.

"Aw. Do you love me~?" He asks.

"No!" I say.

"Wow, don't get so defensive, it was a joke," he says.

"Joke or not, i don't love you. Okay? You don't have to be so obsessed over yourself, it's embarrassing. Why would I love you?" I ask.

"It's okay to not like me," Stan says.

"Well, lets go. We'll be late. If I'm late,I'll blame you," I say.

~Kyle is often RUDE, there is a difference with a sassy and not so socially capable person and one that's just fucking rude and some people jump over it like crows. Yeah, time skip.~

"I love you," I say.

"I love you too," Stan answers, looking down at me.

He's so much taller than me, it's weird.

"Like, I really do and I don't know why the hell I can't say it. My mom and family in general are so homophobic and-," I say, starting to cry.

"Sh, my dad's a homophobe as well. It's okay," he says.

He kisses me. Somehow, it immediately makes me trusting of him, the way he is acting.

~Has happened, a bit too often, even in the good fanfics. It's just... so tempting to make Randy and Sheila (especially) homophobic to add conflict. Anyway, time skip for the smut.~

He kisses me, pushing me on the bed slightly, which makes me fall over because apparently I'm light or he is fucking Superman... that would explain why I forgive him so easily.

"Ever had sex?" Stan asks.

"No," I say, shaking my head.

He nods before kissing me again, pulling at my shirt to get it over my head. I get it off him so he can take my shirt off, then he starts to get off his own.

"Okay," He says.

He is really muscular, like, the attractive kind. He takes my chin, pulls it up and take my lips into one more kiss before he gets my jeans off. He then takes his own.

"Wow, Dude," I say.

I'm about to blurt out no homo but that would be so fucking far from the truth. His dick is fucking huge.

"Holy fuck," I say.

"Have we never changed in the same changing room? Dude, we've been friend for like 16 years. You must have seen it," Stan says.

Yeah... eh, I guess I haven't.

"I don't think I have. Holy fuck," I say.

He laughs before helping me turn.

"Just going to go in dry," he says.

"Okay," I say.

He puts his dick inside of me. I put my hand into my mouth as to not make any moaning noises. When he hits something, it's a bit harder to keep noises out. He does it again and again before I finally come. He comes after maybe a minute has passed.

"Well, that happened," I say.

"A lot less kinky than I was expecting but okay," Stan says.

"Maybe some other time?" I ask.

He smiles before taking me into a hug and then a kiss.

"Did we ever even become official?" He asks.

I shake my head, laughing slightly.

"Okay then. Will you be my boyfriend?" He asks.

"M-Me? Of course!" I say.

He kisses me again.

"I used to depressed before this started," I say.

"So I cured your depression?" Stan asks.

"Yeah," I say.

He kisses me.

"I'm glad," he says.

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Look, depression is an illness. Loving someone doesn't cure it. Thank you, please stop it, make the characters get help, please, I beg of you, don't tell people they need to be loved to be better, people need therapy.

~Eko.