Why couldn't I gather the courage to actually ask for Lauren and speak to my father? I snuck out of the base and didn't even contact my sister instead I stayed silent while my father asked. My mother went though all the hassle of contacting me through the online game giving me all the contact information for them.

I bet I looked pathetic to anyone around. The uncomfortable silence and the scared lonely expression on my face.  I was angry at myself when I hung up and threw it away. Destroying it as well.

What was the point of making this call? If I don't have the guts?