Author : Daydreamer_Jhope

Reviewer : chemicalkrackel

NAMJOON: THE LONELY CHILD

Cover : 5/10

- the cover was really a sweet treat to eyes IF viewed as a simple edit but as the book you were trying to dish on the plate it didn't really settle well .
As the theme you tried to represent the was loneliness of a kid and Namjoon helping her come over it should have had a glint of sadnedd and gloominess but instead to me it was more like a yellow namjoon aesthetic I'd rather find on Pinterest

Title : 3/10

-the title was more like an essays header and as one proceeds with the story it no more makes sense , it is more like a kids fanatical dream of being rescued by a knight in shining armor type of aura .

Synopsis : 1/10

- I tried my best to understand at what you wanted me to know or from any reader point but to me all it was , was load of nonsense
It was not only fast paced but so many things made no sense they were just vague , I'd love the fact if you edit out the plotline and fix all the plotholes ( more like the whole book ) and try changing perseptions of writing

Plot : 2/30

- the plot was nothing but a load of shitty surface like how can someone you know make friends with a stranger and then go out to watch movies and stay alone and do all your chores when all you are is a 12 year old kid !!!
And more like it felt like straight up asking for stupidity and mind meddling i felt that all you did was pour the mind of a kid with nothing but senselessly made vague imaginations of trusting a stranger in all to me it was not even a speck of dust and as I said before PLEASED CONSIDER YOUR PLOT LINE .

characters : 0/10

- Ashley is a dumb kid . Namjoon is confusing and shady af and all the plot is haywire with nonsense strangling rubbish .

Grammar : 4/25

- poor grammar , you know even a book without a good plotline sometimes is barable when grammar is fine but here that's not even something I'd like to talk about like idk where you belong to or your tongue but I really want you to hire an editor once you are done with the reformation of the plotline and characters

writing style : 1/10

- please practice a lot of writing if you want to pursue writing as a career, please try writing scenes out of oneliners and imaginary so that improves your skills and try reader more and more good quality books .

overall

- I felt that i was reading a story book of a kid in a grade of about 1 or 2 , but please don't take this to heart cause everyone has different opinions so this one was mine and if you aren't satisfied then you sure and go on with other reviewers too and then when you find your answers do what is right but seriously there are alot of parts you should be focusing on .allof this is for your own well being

Total : 16/100

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