Author's note

I have posted a Shakhi TS called Entwined in my Shakhi OS Book. Please do check it.

I have opened an Instagram page so that I can stay connected with my readers and a page for my writing. I write in multiple fandoms and for me to post more Shakhi content, it would be nice to have more Shakhians in the page.

We can discuss Shaurya's characterization or what we love in the story. We could discuss OS ideas, spoilers for next chapter and may be an exclusive story for Instagram readers. If interested, follow me at Instagram 

@  inkedby_nan (Link at announcement)

PS: No proof reading done, ignore errors, thank you.

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Shakhi SS Marriage Of Convenience 

Chapter Thirty Nine

Astha forgot what it was like to be at Sabharwal House again. Years back she went out by choice and the house never looked back at her. The time she spent outside the gates of Sabharwal House, waiting to catch a glimpse of her son still remained fresh in her memory.

But Astha had witnessed what made Sabharwal House family. Back then, in outside they all looked like a happy joint family but they had their downs. Tej and Devi were childless. Alok and Gayatri got married before Shaan and Astha did and remained childless.

It was Shaan and Astha's son, Shaurya who became the first born of Sabharwal family. He was the apple of everyone's eye. When he was a baby, he was raised by not one, not two but three mothers and fathers. Whatever love and longing they all had, Shaurya was the answer to their prayers.

With Shaurya came the good luck and SIAC flourished. Alok and Gayatri were blessed with a baby boy. Tej and Devi were broken with no children but Astha still remember how she and Shaan found a depressed Devi and placed baby Shaurya in her arms.

Devi was genuine with Astha save for Astha's undying urge to stand up for herself and challenge their house's custom. She didn't play tricks or trapped Astha. Heck, she was the one who convinced Tej and Tej's mother for Astha and Shaan's love marriage. She was even considerate with Astha than Gayatri mainly because of Shaurya.

When Astha was at the verge of leaving Sabharwal House, all Devi could see was a chance for herself to be with Shaurya, to be his mother, to be his centre of universe and so, she grabbed it. She knew she didn't play fair but her love for the boy blinded her too much.

May be, that is why Astha found it in her to let her heart start forgiving Devi because what connects them both is their undying love for Shaurya. She had witnessed first hand of how Devi has longed for a child and she knows that Devi went through what she went through for twenty-five years when Shaurya left Sabharwal House.

Astha saw how people like Tej, Devi and Alok whom she believed could never reform themselves did. During one of his visits, Shaan brought along Tej and Alok. She never thought they would but they apologized to her that day. It wouldn't change what happened in those twenty-five years but it can change their life in coming years. She didn't accept because they apologized but she accepted to forgive them on seeing their changed behaviour.

When Astha left Sabharwal House, she was sure that things would never change there but she was happy to be proved wrong. One unsaid fact that remained was that it was Shaurya who held the family together. He was the first born to show the family what love could be. He was the one everyone pampered and took pride in. It was his love that made them who they were.

That was why when Shaurya left Sabharwal House, the elders couldn't cope up with his void. When Shaurya left, it was as if a part of them left with him, leaving them with unanswered questions. In his absence they started to question themselves, their behaviour, their nature and their life's decisions that it made them see the world differently, see their own family differently.

When Shaan called Astha that morning to come to Sabharwal House, she was very sceptical given how Shaurya might react but even the Sabharwals weren't sure whether Shaurya might turn up and the rest of family wanted to meet her as well. So, she took a leap of faith and came back to Sabharwal House.

Astha thought she was ready to face Shaurya, to take his anger and to answer him. But her heart felt a dip when she found him standing next to Yash and Kanchan, a big smile dancing on his lips as he conversed with them.

A gasp left Astha's lips when Shaurya's head whipped towards her direction. Her heart sank when she watched how the curve of his smile decreased by seconds and slowly faded into a frown before his face went pale devoid of smile.

"Shaurya aa gaya kya?" Devi, who hasn't noticed Shaurya yet, asked Kitty who was nearby.

"Badi maa, Astha maa, Shaurya bhaiya toh ek ganta pehle hi aa gaye hein. Wahan pe" Kitty sided pointing at Shaurya.

Devi's eyes glistened as she saw Shaurya back at Sabharwal House, the place where she firmly believes that he belongs. She was overjoyed on seeing Shaurya that she forgot Astha's presence by her side and rushed to Shaurya who stood rooted to his place, his gaze lowered.

"Shaurya! Happy Birthday Beta" Devi engulfed Shaurya in a hug.

Shaurya blinked back his tears as he placed his one hand on Devi's shoulder. He lifted his head and stared at Astha who's watching them with a longing gaze before she averted her gaze and moved towards Shaan.

Devi broke the hug and gushed over Shaurya who gave her a forced smile and touched her feet. She blessed him and cracked her knuckles at him.

"Anokhi kahan pe hai? Kahi nazar nahi aa ri?" Devi asked after applying a red tikka to Shaurya's forehead and feeding prasad to Shaurya.

On the mention of Anokhi's name, Shaurya closed his eyes and took a deep breathe, trying to push out the image of four-year Shaurya and ten-year Shaurya, the former standing with Shaan and Astha while the later standing with Tej and Devi.

'Your mother had her reasons to leave you behind' Shaurya told himself, trying to reason to himself, 'What Badi maa did was out of love. They both love you'

Yes, to say Shaurya's hurt, angry and disappointed with his Badi maa would be an understatement. But she raised him, protected him, nurtured him, fed him, cared him, loved him and lived for him. He was accustomed to see her smiling face. Receiving her love was what fed his raging soul all those years.

When Shaurya came to Sabharwal House to meet everyone, he wanted to meet his Badi maa, to at least pretend that things were same and that he can enjoy a bit with his family before breaking down in front of his Badi maa. He knew he had to know from his Badi maa before he confronts his mother.

But seeing Astha here broke a river of feelings, frustrations and pains that Shaurya kept holding. He felt difficult to breathe to see the two women together. He had abundance love for them both. If only they hadn't fought over him, he could have a easy, happy childhood rather than a painful one. He wouldn't live a scarred life. Rather a complete beautiful one with his whole family. 

Shaurya was robbed off all those childhood pleasures, his twenty-six years of happiness that he deserved thanks to these two women. He would have brought himself to forgive them one by one but to see them walking in together, all smiles pained him.

"Yahi kahi hogi, Badi maa" Shaurya said, looking around only to find Anokhi and Astha smiling at each other.

Shaurya swallowed when he watched Astha and Anokhi hug. Devi gave a pat to Shaurya's cheek and gave prasad to family members one by one before walking up to Astha and Anokhi. She gave them prasad and placed her hand on Astha's when she realized the reason behind Astha's silence.

Devi assured Astha with blink of her eyes followed by few comforting words. None slipped from Shaurya's notice as he watched Astha smiling at Devi and placing her other hand on top of Devi's.

Shaurya didn't realize he was scrunching the flower he had in his hand until Anokhi took it from his hand. She looked at the crushed petals in her hand before looking up at her husband.

"Shaurya" Anokhi whispered to Shaurya as she wounded her hand with his, interlacing their fingers.

"Anokhi, I...I..." Shaurya stammered, swallowing his words.

"Shaurya, we know the truth, you know the truth. She tried to reach out to you. She had her valid reasons. Remember that" Anokhi whispered to Shaurya as she comfortingly rubbed his arm, "They both love you, keep that in mind"

It took couple of minutes of Anokhi's soft whispering for Shaurya's panic to die down. Yes, he's more than half way there in forgiving his mothers but the pain and torment was twenty-six years heavy that at times, it drags him down. He can forgive them but where will he oust his angst, anger and tears?

Astha had her reasons to leave him, yes, but she made the choice where she left him. In Shaurya's words, she abandoned him. He would have lived happily even in a hut if it means being with his mother. His thirty years of life, his academic achievements, being director of SIAC, nothing would have stood chance before his mother being with him.

Whatever Devi did to Astha, whatever she did to keep Shaurya with herself, she did it out of love she had for Shaurya, yes, but in the name of loving him, she has destroyed what makes him the person who he is and Shaurya wasn't sure if he could ever be whole again, to love and trust the same, to look the world same, to even feel and be the Shaurya Sabharwal he always was because, to be honest, he forgot who he himself was.

Astha gathered whatsoever courage she could gather within herself and walked towards Shaurya with Shaan beside her. She stood before him and waited for him to look up at her and when he did,

"Happy Birthday Shaurya" Astha wished with a small smile while Shaan and Anokhi stared at Shaurya with a blank face who took a sharp intake of breath before fixing his gaze on Astha.

"Thank you" Shaurya replied with a forced smile as he tightened his grip on Anokhi's and nod his head at Astha.

Sensing the tension and silence between them, Alok did the honor of gathering everyone.

"Sab aa jao. Cake cutting ka time aa gaya hai" Alok said as he came in between Astha and Shaurya, grabbed Shaurya's hand and took him along with him to the coffee table where cake was placed.

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Hey guys, hope you all are doing good. I'm a bit sick, under medication and with festive season, I'm travelling around. This is the best I could write off at this moment. Getting my flow back. Hope you all enjoyed reading the chapter. Thank you for your response on previous chapter and please do read author's note at the top.

A kind request, I have anxiety disorder. I appreciate you taking your time to comment. That's what boost me to write more. But when you comment 'Update soon' or 'where's the update?' or 'why is it taking long?' my mind blocks out. I get panic ending up in severe writer's block. So, if you really like my work, I would appreciate if you comment on how the chapter is or a simple thank you rather than above questions. I'm under medication and I sleep nearly half a day, so I tend to take time as I juggle between three books. Hope you all understand and don't take it in any offending way.

Thank you for reading.

Nan ~