Alexander was never one to easily voice his feelings. Instead of being vocal about his thoughts, he wrote them down, and after he scribbled them down? Well, he'd do one of three things;

1. He would get someone he trusted (typically Laurens or Lafayette) and ask them to read it. Those two being two of his most trusted people, the two that know everything about his person, would usually know how to ease his mind after reading his words.

2. He'd hide his words away somewhere, folding them up and sliding them into a notebook of sorts. He doesn't always like asking for help, yet he still liked writing his feelings down. It held some sort of relief to him.

3. Before the next is stated, you must understand that Alexander was a very paranoid man. There were some things he was scared to let other people know. Some examples would be his suicidal thoughts, were his own mind, his greatest weapon, turned on him, its wielder. Another example would be his occasional anxiety attacks. Unlike Thomas, his weren't triggered by social interaction, but rather stress, and fear of the unknown. He recalls on one occasion, it was right before a cabinet meeting, and one of his many political enemies had told him that soon, he would have the immigrant sent back to the island of Nevis. He showed up to the meeting with tears streaming down his face, yet still insisting he was fine. Washington had to calm the boy down, and assured him that would never happen while he was alive. Madison and Jefferson also had the decency to promise he'd be okay. But those three were also sworn to secrecy, those three to this day are the only ones to see him in that state of pure fear. Fear of returning to his origin. Anyway, the stuff like that, anxiety and suicidal thoughts? When he wrote that down, soon after jotting it down, he'd grow extremely paranoid someone would find it and burns it at once.

Though, sometimes, Alexander didn't even need to talk. Sometimes, they could just pick up on it without having to say a word. Especially John Laurens. John could read Alexander like the back of his hand, and he always knew just how to ease the shorter male. Today was most certainly no exception.

Alexander had been caught up in his thoughts, his head growing heavier with every negative thought crossing his mind. If John had asked, he would have simply replied that he was tired. But John knew his Alex too good to ask. Instead, upon seeing him with that far off look in his eyes, a frown pasted upon his face, he simply wrapped his arms around his husband's waist and held him close against his chest. And that's all it took for Alexander to cave in. He shrunk against his husband who stood a whole foot taller than him, curled into his chest and hugging John's torso, and he let the tears fall. And John still stayed silent, simply letting his Alexander cry onto his shoulder. He sat there, rubbing the Caribbean immigrant's back for reassurance, and he kept doing that until the tears stop. Yet even then, he sat there, holding his husband in a tight embrace.

Alexander leaned into the hold, resting his head against John's chest. He felt as though a weight had been lifted from his shoulders as he did so. John always had a calming aura to him, as Thomas said, he gives some of the best comfort cuddles.

John's hands rubbed up and down Alex's arms, helping him release any nerves left in him. The smaller male relaxed as he sat in his husband's lap, just melting into the embrace. He always felt calm with his John. And John was always happy to help him

"I love you Alex, and I will forever and always."

Alexander felt his heart swell up with joy. This man always had his heart.

"I love you too John."