4~Anger And Love

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Shreenidhi and Siddhu were sleeping cuddling to each other when she woke up. She looked at his arms around her and moved them and sat up. Am I forcing myself on him? She thought and stood up and made her way towards the balcony and looked down from there. What if he leaves and ignores me like before? What if he starts disliking my clinging onto him like he used to do before? Will I be alone again? Should I leave before that happens? I don't want to get hurt again. I don't have energy for that. She thought and a lone tear escaped her eye.

She turned and climbed on the railing sitting on it with her legs crossed and dangling. Slow breeze caused her hair to sway and she looked up at the sky. Should I leave him and go to God? Will he miss me and love me then? Did he ever love me? Does he love me now or is he doing all this just to avoid my tantrums? She thought and more tears fell from her eyes. Will he cry if I die? Will my death be his punishment or a treat for him? What will it be? She thought sinking more into depression.

She was thinking all this while sitting on the railing looking down the balcony. Siddhu woke up and rubbed his eyes and noticed Shreenidhi wasn't there. He looked around the room and saw her at the balcony. He slapped his forehead. "Wahan kya ja kar baith gayi? Us din ki tarha gir jaye gi yaar," he said and stood up and rushed to her. He encircled his arms around her waist and she startled. "Kya kar rahi ho yahan? Pagal ho kya? Utro yahan se," he said and she looked back at him.


"Kis taraf? Yahan peechhe jahan tum kharay ho, ya phir yahan aagay jahan neeche zameen hai, us taraf?" she asked. He lifted her in his arms and took her to the room and almost threw her over the bed. "Pagal ho gayi ho? Kuchh bhi bolti ho, idiot," he said angrily and she looked on. He held his forehead and sighed. "Dekho Shreenidhi, ye mera gussa bhi hai aur meri concern bhi, tum wahan ja kar baith gayi, tum slip ho jaati toh? Tum gir jaati toh? Tumhe lag jaati toh?" he asked shouting at her, she trembled.

"Aray main pakk gaya hoon tumhari harkato'n se, pakk gaya hoon tumhare nakhro'n se, bas karo yaar please," he said and folded his hands in front of her. More tears rolled down her cheeks seeing him shouting at her mercilessly. She got up and stood in front of her. "Pakk gaye ho na? Jaanti thi main, wahan baithay baithay yahi soch rahi thi ke kaheen main tum ko kuchh ziada he force toh nahi kar rahi, kaheen tum mujhe chhor toh nahi do gay, kya mujhe uss se pehle tumhe chhor jaana chahiye ya phir marr...," she was cut in between as he palmed her mouth."Aisa mat kaha karo, aur aisa nahi kartay yaar, doosri baar wahan ja kar baithi ho, ab koodti toh main nahi tha neeche bachanay ke liye," he said and she yanked her hand from her mouth. "Agar main slip ho jaati, gir jaati, lag jaati, toh aisi neend so jaati ke tumhe mujhe jagaane ke liye rona parr jaata," she said in a choked voice and he held her arms aggressively. "Shut up! Maaroon kya khud apnay haath se main tumhe?" he asked angrily and she lowered her head. He left her arms and sighed and calmed down his anger.He held her face and made her look at him. "Dekho, main darr gaya tha, mujhe thori si bhi dair hoti toh tum sach mein gir jaati," he said and wiped her tears. She looked at him with her eyes fully drenched with tears. He kissed her forehead and pulled her in a hug tightly, it pained to see her cry, she hugged him back and sobbed. "Achha bubba sorry, daant diya na isliye, lekin yaad rakho ke jo gussa ziada karta hai na woh pyaar bhi ziada karta hai," he said caressing her hair.

"Lekin humesha gussa toh main karti hoon na, matlab pyaar bhi main he karti hoon, tum toh ab ja kar gussa karne lagay ho na, matlab ye toh newly found love hua na," she said breaking the hug. "Abhi abhi gussa karne laga hoon?" he asked and she nodded. "Chal jhooti, shahdi ki pehli raat se he itna gussa karta tha main toh," he said and she shook her head. "Tum nahi, sirf main," she said and began to cry again turning her back to him and this time she was very inconsolable. He held his head and turned her towards him."Chup! Chup bilkul! Kaha na chup!" he said sternly and she got quiet, he calmed down again seeing her innocent face. "God you're such a baby, kiun roti ho itna? Mujhe toh lagta hai maine shahdi nahi ki, balkay ek bacha adopt kiya hai, aur iss shaitan bachay pe jitna gussa aata hai na utna he pyaar bhi aata hai, I have grown fond of this cute devil kid," he said cupping her cheeks and wiped her tears. She didn't say anything, she just looked at him fondly and cupped his cheeks. "Really? Pyaar bhi aata hai?" she asked softly.

"Haan, pyaar bhi aata hai," he said and bent down and picked her in his arms while she kept gazing at his face cutely. He walked to the bed and lied her down and pulled a duvet over her. He went and lied on the other side and extended his arm towards her calling her for a cuddle. She smiled and willingly got closer to him to get engulfed in his warm cuddle. He wrapped his arms around her. She too wrapped her arm around him. "Tu milay, dil khilay, aur jeene ko kya chahiye, na ho tu udaas tere aas paas main rahoon ga zindagi bhar, saare sansaar ka pyaar maine tujhi mein paaya, tum mile, dil khilay, aur jeene ko kya chahiye," he sang to her and she smiled feeling enlightened and they both slept peacefully in each other's warmth.

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