HE STARED at me as if he was trying to read my mind – I smiled at him, reassuring him that whatever I'm going to say will never harm him. I kept staring at him and for the first time I let him see the pain in my eyes. My mouth dropped open as he approached me and hugged me tightly.

I couldn't move from where I was standing and closed my eyes as I felt his probably the last hug that he gave me, "why do I feel like you're leaving me, babe?" he whispered.

One of his arms is wrapped around my waist while one of his hands caresses my hair. I felt something stuck in my mouth and I was unable to speak to him. It was a question that I never expected him to ask me.

"Lisanna is coming back, Natsu" I whisper – I felt him flinch which makes me smile bitterly "She called me six days ago," I swallowed my sobs and then stare on the ceiling as if it will help me to stop my tears "But what I'm going to tell you is not really related to her but to me. And I really hope that you will listen to me" even though you're not interested in me.

I slipped out of his embrace and stared into his face. I could see in his eyes that he was confused. He cleared his throat then looked down as if he was trying to reorganize his thoughts.

I smiled bitterly at his reaction - I held out one of his hands – squeezing slightly, silently telling him that I'm here with him.

"I'm the one here in front of you but you're thinking about her, Natsu" I saw the shock written all over his face when he met my gaze again "Don't worry Natsu. If you want to see my best friend. I won't stop you. But please, hear me out."

He sighs, "All right tell me"

I took a deep breath and looked hard at him "I love you, Natsu"

I saw his expression change – it was the expression I never knew I'd see him. Confused. I felt the tightness of my chest as I stared into his face. He opened his mouth to say something but he eventually closed it as if his own words failed him.

I expected him to react like this but it still hurts.

"I... Lucy," he looked confused and upset "You can't love me, yet" the last words were almost like a whisper.

I don't know why he said 'yet' but to tell you honestly, it was a word that gave me a little hope for him. Hope that he will eventually love me like I did.

But as I looked at his face. In his reaction. I knew in myself that it was impossible for what I wanted to happen. That his love was not really for me but for another woman.

"I know. I just want to inform you," I smiled at him before sighing "You don't have to answer me, Natsu. I'm okay"

I'm not okay!

I clear my throat and smile at him which makes him even look confused. Maybe he was thinking why I'm smiling despite the fact that he rejected me. To be honest, I really want to cry but I just don't want him to see me being hurt. I still want him to see how strong I am.

"I have to go back to my office to get ready for our meeting. See you later" I say casually.

I didn't wait for what he would say because I had already started walking towards my office. I didn't look back and just kept walking while feeling my heart slowly breaking down.

Erza was right. I loved him so much and I left no love for myself.

THREE days since I confessed my feelings for him. Three days ever since he avoided me as if I had a contagious disease. Three days since I locked myself in my office to further increase the security of my system. I don't know what went through my mind but maybe because I was broken hearted my sleeping brain cells started working.

You know, I'm a little thankful that I had things to do. I don't think much about the rejection I received from him and how he avoids me now. Maybe, this is his way of not hurting me anymore. Though, it was too late because I was already hurt.

I looked at my cellphone when I heard the notification sound. And I almost forget to breathe when I see the message that is there.

To: Lisanna

Everyone is here in Erza's shop for my husband and I's welcome party. Aren't you going Lucy? It's been two days since I arrived but I haven't seen you yet.

I don't know what to do with the message I received. Am I going?

The cellphone rang again to signal receipt of the message

To: Erza Scarlet

Come here Lucy

To: Natsu Dragneel

I'll answer your confession, Lucy. Please meet me in Erza's shop.

I lick my lower lip before biting it. Am I going?

AN HOUR passed before I decided to go to Erza's shop for Lisanna's welcome party and for Natsu's formal rejection. It was kinda weird to receive my formal rejection after welcoming the person who was the reason I was rejected.

I was just getting out of my car when I saw two familiar people. My chest immediately tightened especially when Natsu held my friend's hand as if he was afraid to hurt it.

"I love you, L—" he didn't finish what he was going to say because he looked at my place, "Lucy" he mumbled under his breath.

I tried to smile when Lisanna met my gaze too. But, I was not able to smile because the tears I tried to hold back cascade on my cheeks. I tried to control my emotion but I was struggling because of too much pain in my heart.

"Lucy!" Lisanna smiled at me but I saw in her eyes that she was confused by my reaction – perhaps this was the very first time she saw me crying. She looked at Natsu, "Excuse me, Natsu but can I talk with her privately?" she asked politely.

Natsu nodded and immediately went inside the shop – but still I knew that he was looking at Lisanna.

I immediately ran towards her and hugged her tightly.

"I miss you, Lisanna," I said truthfully. It was true that I miss her after all, she was my best friend. And I don't hate her just because Natsu was in love with her.

"Are you okay, Lucy?" Lisanna asked me worriedly "This is the first time I saw you like this" she whispered.

"I just miss you, Lisanna," I swallowed my own sobs as I pushed her a little so I could see her face properly.

Lisanna looks so beautiful. And she looks so happy. I wonder if I ever see myself being happy just like her.

"I'm so happy for you, Lisanna" I say

Lisanna opens her mouth to speak but eventually closes it as if her own words failed her. Lisanna gently wrapped her arms around me as I felt her gently kissing me on my forehead. I sob even more – I wanted to tell her that I'm really okay but my own words failed me. It was like my own words are tired me lying.

"I wish I could ask you why you're acting like this, Lucy. I wish I could help you get rid of whatever you are feeling right now" Lisanna whispers through my ear.

I felt her gently wiping my tears on my cheeks and smiled "I'm here, Lucy. You are not alone"

I smile at her "I know and thank you for that, Lisanna"

Seeing Lisanna right now gave me courage. Courage to move on. I did not go to his welcome party and said goodbye to him. I don't want to stay in the same place with the man I want to forget. Hearing him confessing his love towards her is enough for me.

It's enough for me to stop my hallucination that he will never be mine.

I was in the middle of putting away my belongings when the door suddenly opened and Natsu entered my room in a hurry. When our eyes met, I saw shock written all over his face when he saw me putting my clothes in the suitcase.

"Where are you going?" he asked me almost like a yell.

I continue whatever I'm doing, "There's probably no reason for me to stay with you" I whispered but I know he heard "I heard what you said to her, Natsu. I want to forget you"

Natsu immediately approached me "Who said I'll let you go?" he asked me. I remain myself mute - he looks frustrated waiting for me to speak, "Why are you doing this to me, Lucy?"

"Because..." I smiled bitterly at him "I don't want to love you anymore"

____________________________ End of Chapter #29

a/n: To be honest, I really don't know how I'm going to end this story and we only had six chapters including the epilogue. Or I'll end this story in the next two chapters. I don't knoooooooooww! 

I'm tore between not ending this story and ending this story. 

Khiegilsan

P.S the original plot of this story was gone :) that's why I really don't know how to end this story T_T