After we finish our food, I insist Christopher for going near the water. It's dark by now, and the beach looks even more beautiful. I kick off my shoes when I get near the sea. I am wearing jeans, but I absolutely don't care about them getting drenched because I just can't miss having a closer look at the ocean. It's something really magnificent to witness and relish. I stand there as the waves hit the shore, and I feel extremely delighted when the water rises above my knees. There aren't many people here, so it feels relaxing with all the stillness around us. The only music that I can hear is of the waves crashing against the shore. I shiver and pull my jacket closer, feeling the cool sea breeze on my skin. This is just so amazing!

After a moment, I look around and realize that Christopher isn't with me. I frown turning back and find him standing afar from the shore and watching me with a smile. I raise an eyebrow at him questioningly and gesture him to come, but he simply denies my offer by shaking his head.

What the hell? Why would he do that? I am not going to take a no from him in any case.

So I immediately run out of the water to get him with me. I reach there and without saying anything, I start pulling him with me.

"I...I.. don't think I want to go into the water, Cole." He says hesitantly as I drag him.

"Why? Are you scared of water?" I ask him in return.

"No...but I don't like.."

"Oh, come on, Christopher. You are not going to drown." I tell him amusedly. "Even if you do, I am here to save you." I joke, tugging at his arm as he rolls his eyes.

"Nicole...." He again tries to protest, looking a bit doubtful.

"Shut up. I am not listening to you. You said you'll do anything to make me happy. Now you have to come."

"But.. I.." Before he can complete his sentence, a wave comes crashing over us. I laugh when I see him scrunching his face as the water hits his legs.

"It isn't that bad, Okay? Don't make that face." I suggest, playfully smacking his shoulder.

"Whatever..." He drawls with a scowl on his face.

"See, it looks so beautiful," I tell Christopher, nudging at his arm gently, looking at the moon above us. I glance at him in confusion when he steps away from my side and moves behind me. The ocean glistens under the faint strikes of light cascading from the crescent moon, making it look more like a scenic portrait.

"Not more than you," Christopher whispers into my ear as he puts his arms around my waist, pulling me towards him. I smile and lean back, resting my head on his chest. We both stand there enjoying the pleasant scenery unfolding in front of our eyes. It feels so magical and being here at the beach with Christopher makes it even better.

After some time we move out of the water. I walk further and sit down on the sand, facing the ocean. Christopher sits next to me with his arm almost brushing against mine. I keep looking at the fascinating view of the waves hitting the shore and then coalescing back into the ocean. Suddenly I feel something tugging at my arm. I turn my head and find it to be Christopher's hand pulling me.

"What?" I snort, looking at him.

"Come here. Sit with me." He says as he wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me towards him so that I am sitting in between his legs. His legs are propped up on either side of me as I lean my back against his chest. His light stubble brushes against my cheek as he moves forward, placing his chin over my shoulder. I love the feeling of his body being this close to me, it's such an intimate position that we are in and I like it so much. It feels like I can stay like this forever.

We stay silent for a minute, after which I slowly ask him. "You know almost a lot about me by now, Christopher, but I just realized I don't know anything about you." I frown, tearing my gaze from the ocean, and tilt my head to look at him. "Except for you being a gangster," I say the next line almost in a low voice, trying not to offend him.

His grey eyes shine under the moonlight as he studies my face. "Isn't it more than enough for you to know? Because that would be the most terrifying part of one's life that a girl wants to know. Don't you think so?" He smirks saying it. "You know that and you are still with me. I don't think you need to know anything else." He laughs, kissing my cheek gently.

"Are you serious, Christopher?" I ask him with an annoyed expression on my face. "You said you want this to work. You want me to trust you." I shift my legs and turn around to get a better look at his face. "How am I supposed to trust you when I know nothing about you?" I huff, looking at him. I don't know why, but every time I look at him, I feel him growing even more handsome day by day. He looks so fucking sexy and perfect.

"Okay...Okay...Don't give me that deadly glare." He says looking at me into my eyes and then his gaze averts towards my lips. "I would rather prefer dying by the softness of your lips than the coldness of your eyes." He smiles, leaning forward and kissing my lips gently. I close my eyes and kiss him back, weaving my fingers into his hair. The kiss is sweet and soothing as I enjoy the feeling of Christopher's lips moving against mine slowly.

"What do you want to know?" He then questions caressing my cheek after we pull back.

"I want to know everything." I breathe with my lips still touching his. "Like really everything?"

He sighs and repeats. "Everything..." He brushes his knuckles upon my cheek and I lean into his touch. "You know what I do. Like you just said. Yes, I am a gangster, Nicole. A bloody gangster." He chuckles humorlessly as he pulls his hand back and my face falls at the loss of contact with his skin. I see his eyes turning darker with a serious expression masking his face as he continues. "I work for a gang called Cobra, which is run by our leader Richard Scott. We have several chains over different parts of the states and even in European countries."

I look at him keenly as he speaks. "Richard has been the ultimate mafia lord, running this business for over 25 years. We do all kinds of bad shit." He shrugs. "You know what I mean?" I read him curiously, nodding at him, and encouraging him to keep going. "Like drug deals, weapon smuggling, and all that nasty shit." He takes a deep breath and says. "Everything except human trafficking. We are not into it." He closes his eyes for a brief moment like he has been reminiscing something and then opens them to look at me. "It's something which is against our business ethics."

"That's strange yet... appreciable," I tell him. "I never knew people had some kind of ethics in shady businesses." I arch an eyebrow at him inquisitively.

"We do have, Cole. Every profession does have its own set of rules and regulations. They have their laws, morals, and values which people working under it have to follow." His gaze flickers over my face for a minute and then says. "No matter if it's bad or good."

I look around, trying to process the words that he said. I shift my face back to glance at him again. Suddenly my throat constricts thinking about what I am going to ask next. I don't know if it's the right question to ask or not at this moment, but I want to know, anyway.

So have you...have you killed people?" I gulp harshly and stutter, asking him the most horrifying question. Somehow I feel like I know the answer already and it's frightening to think of Christopher accepting the truth before me, and telling me what I am already expecting but nonetheless I want to hear it from him. I want him to be honest with me, to make me able to trust him.

"I wouldn't lie, Nicole." He looks towards the ocean, not meeting my gaze as a shadow of guilt envelopes his face. "I have killed people." He sighs heavily and looks down. "My hands are stained with blood, but I can ensure you one thing that they aren't of innocent ones."

"I've never taken the life of an innocent." His eyes gleam, looking at me as if expecting me to say something.

"Please say something?" He urges me with a sudden agitation in his tone.

"Are you scared, Cole? After knowing this?" He secures his arms tightly around me as if fearing that I would run away from me after hearing it. "I know it is indeed scarier to know that I kill people." He shakes his head in disappointment. "I could have skipped this conversation or just kept things from you, but I don't want to do that."

"I want to be honest with you. If you want to leave me right now, then you can." There is an unusual sadness in his eyes like it's painful for him to say it. "I would go away from your life and never again show my face to you." His grey eyes become glassy as he utters. "But trust me with one thing, I would never try to hurt you." I place my hand over his chest as he leans forward and kisses my forehead.

"I don't want you to leave..." I press my forehead against his and say. He smiles, looking relieved after hearing my response.

After a while, I move back and ask him. "What about your family? Your parents and siblings?"

The moment he hears that his body turns rigid, and he clenches his jaw. His demeanor strangely changes and a stern look takes over his face, indicating to me that something was wrong. "Never had one. Richard found me in some kind of ditch when I was 2 years old. He brought me with him and took care of me." He tells in an oddly straight voice as I look at him.. "Since then, I have been working for him. I am grateful to him for everything that he has given me."

I feel sad thinking about how hard it would have been for him to be growing up without parents and then being forced into a profession at such a tender age without even having the knowledge of what it really dealt with. That really sucks! I want to say something to make him feel better but I don't want him to think that I am trying to sympathize because that's the worst feeling one can have while being comforted so I just wrap my arms around him and hug him.

"Any girlfriends?" I ask him after I pull back.

"Now I feel like I am being interrogated." He chuckles lightly, scanning my face with amusement.

I shove at his chest playfully and say. "If you want, you can ask me questions too. I wouldn't mind." I shrug.

"Trust me, Cole. I don't want to know how many guys you have dated. Because I wouldn't be able to control myself from hunting each one of them down and beating the crap out of them." He states with a dirty scowl on his face.

"You don't have to do that...because I only had one boyfriend." I laugh, patting his cheek. "And it was really long back. I guess when I was in school."

"I am glad to know that." He kisses me, turning me around so that I am facing him now.

"So getting back to my question. Did you have any?"

I study his face as he struggles to think about it. "Yes, I had a girlfriend." He looks at me and says. "I was in a relationship with Richard's daughter, Sophia. We grew up together, so we were pretty close." He lets out the next sentence with a disgusted look on his face. "We dated for quite a long time. Everything was going well until she cheated on me."

"Ohhh...."

"I've never been with many women, Nicole. It was just Sophia and Mia."

"Who is Mia?" I ask him with a confused look.

"She is a stripper at a club in Boston. After I broke up with Sophia, I started going to her." He confesses truthfully.

Suddenly I feel a strange knot of jealousy building in the pit of my stomach. Fuck! I move back from him, thinking about the women he had been with. And my mind fills with all the crazily weird and sickening thoughts. Did he touch him the way he touches me? Did he kiss them the way he kisses? Did he enjoy being in bed with them? Did they please him more than me? Of course, they would have, Nicole. Because they were fucking professionals, unlike your little fat virgin ass. Oh, god! Why am I thinking about this? The mental image of Christopher being with some other woman is certainly not enjoyable.

"Hey, are you jealous?" He catches hold of my arm before I move back further. I slap his hand and look away. Sensing the sudden change in my behavior, he moves forward and cups my cheeks, making me face him.

"Look at me, Nicole." He leans forward with his face being exactly in front of me. "I've never been with any woman since I met you." He sighs and searches my face, looking doomed. "Trust me. I want to tell you this. It was only one time when I ended up in Mia's bed after I met you." He knits his eyebrow with a worried emotion veiling his face. He gulps harshly, looking at me with his deep grey eyes as if it's difficult for him to convey it. "That too when I was frustrated......I was frustrated because I couldn't find any information about you. I was completely vexed after searching for an entire year and still not being able to find you."

"I was drunk." He runs his fingers through his hair in frustration and shakes his head, trying to erase that memory. "It was just a mistake, Cole. Believe me."

I know he wants to be honest with me, and he is trying his best at it. It isn't easy for him too to reveal all this to me, but I am happy that he is trying. Even though it's unpleasant to learn about this part of his life but I suck it up because I don't care about his past. What matters to me is us and the time we are having together knowing each other. I am glad that he is opening for me.

I nod at him and ask the instant next question that occurs to me. "Were you in love with any of them?"

He observes my face for a moment and then answers me. "Nope....I never really felt like I was in love with Sophia." He lets out a deep breath and says. "And I think I never had feelings for Mia." He pulls me closer to him, securing his arms tightly around me. I don't want to ask him about this more because I know I wouldn't like more details about his past love life or sexual life.

I process his words, and then something suddenly hits my mind. I remember once Christopher referring to an accident he met with. It was after the time when I first kissed him, but at that moment I didn't listen to him properly because my stupid ass was pretending to ignore him. I don't know why the hell I was doing that? I couldn't get to know it that day, so I think of asking it now. "I remember you once mentioning about some accident you had? What is it?"

His face turns serious and his gaze wavers hesitantly, making me think if I have done something wrong by bringing this now. And then his eyes peer at me with a strange glint of sadness in them. He looks towards the ocean behind me and breathes heavily. "Yes, it was three years ago. I was in Spain for a business deal. While returning from it, my car fell off the cliff." He pauses for a moment as if struggling to get the right words and then continues. "I had a terrible head injury causing my memory loss. I was in a coma for four months."

It is shocking to discover something like this. I look at him in astonishment, not believing what he just said. "That would.... have been terrible. What happened after that?"

I see the nerves over his forehead protruding as he closes his eyes. When he opens them back, I see pure sorrow swimming in them. It seems like it's really difficult for him to talk about it. And I feel bad for causing him this pain by asking a question on such a sensitive topic, so I just grab his hand and intertwine our fingers, holding it tightly. I look at him and nod, ensuring that everything would be fine.

He looks at me and responds with a sad smile. "I woke up after four months. I didn't know where I was. I didn't know who I was and what I was doing." His voice becomes hoarse with grief. "Richard brought me back to his home. For several days I wouldn't talk to anyone and stay locked up in my room."

"I tried really hard to remember my past life, Nicole...but I couldn't. I couldn't remember anything. How I was before? What I did? Where I lived? I just couldn't remember." I feel a lump building in my throat as I see Christopher's dejected face. I've never seen him like this and it pains me so much to look at him being this heartbroken. I wish I could do something to lessen his agony. I wish I could make him feel better.

"It drove me to a state of a massive depression. At one point I was so frustrated that I decided to end.." He chokes, spitting those words as I squeeze his hand gently. "..my life.." He completes the sentence whispering the words, and I shut my eyes feeling his pain.

We don't speak for a moment, letting the sound of the waves take over the silence around us. After a minute, I look back to him and ask. "Then how did you get back to everything?"

He sighs and clears his throat, trying to gather himself. "Richard helped me. He and Sophia helped me to know what my life was like before. Richard introduced me back to my work, to the place where I belonged. At first, I was skeptical about what he was telling me to do, but then over a period of time, I got accustomed to it. It was difficult for me, but with Richard's help, I soon established back my position in the business. I owe a great debt of gratitude to that guy."

Christopher then attempts to mask his sadness by pulling up a smile on his face as he says. "But I am much better now...except for the occasional nightmares that I get."

"What kind of nightmares?" I ask him.

"They are just terrible nightmares." He looks into my eyes as his grey pools darken. "Nightmares questioning my own existence. Nightmares about getting lost in a maze and not being able to find myself. Nightmares about not knowing my real self. Nightmares about not knowing the purpose of my life..." He shakes his head in frustration and looks at me.

"Funny thing is, I still don't remember anything about my life before that accident." Christopher lets out a sad chuckle and says.

"What did the doctors say?" I question him instantly.

"They said it was uncertain to know when I'll get back my memory as it was terrible brain damage. It can be now or after a few months or after a few years or maybe....never." He breathes heavily, and it causes my heart to ache thinking about what he has been through.

"Can I ask you something?" I ask after a moment, to which he responds with a nod. "Do you believe in Richard?"

"What do you mean?" He questions with a frown over his face.

"You said you never remembered what your life was before that accident." I sigh and look into his eyes, attempting to let him know what I am intending to say. "Do you believe what he has told you about your life?"

His eyes grow bigger as he grasps what I am trying to say. "You mean... he could have lied?

He scans my face with a bewildered expression, and I nod hesitantly.

"I..I never thought that way, Nicole. Richard was the first person to be there when I opened my eyes in the hospital. He was the one who took care of me when I was completely devastated and broken." He stutters saying the next thing. "I've never seen my father." His lips quiver softly. "Richard is someone whom I look up to as my father. Why would he lie to me?"

"I don't know it just came to my mind, Christopher.. What if your life wasn't like this before? How would you know that?"

He looks at me with his eyebrows knitting together. "I don't know. It never appeared to me like what I was doing was wrong. It felt like I have been doing this for a long time...that's why I trusted him. I learned everything so quickly that it made me believe that I had this in my veins. It felt like I belonged to the world I was being acquainted with, the world which I left behind me and came back to claim my power. It felt like I came back to run the business that I owned."

"I don't know...I just don't know, Cole." Christopher whispers as he lowers his head into his hands looking utterly defeated.

I realize that it's already painful for him to open this much. I got to know a part of his life that was absolutely terrible than any of the nightmares one can have. I feel really bad for him. I don't want to add to his agony by stressing him more on this topic. He had opened his heart to me, showing the most vulnerable side of his life, and I appreciate it. I just want to show him that I am going to be by his side no matter what happens. I put my hands around his neck and make him look at me.

"Hey, Christopher...look at me..." His grey eyes peek at me slowly with pain held in them. His eyes shine brightly and I wonder how Christopher still manages to look beautiful when he is aching from inside. I gaze into his grief-stricken eyes and then pull him down to kiss him on the forehead.

"Everything is going to be fine." I pull back to look at him and whisper. "I am with you."

A/N:

Sorry guys, I know nothing is really happening in these chapters and the story is going a bit slow. But I promise that you are going to witness some drama soon. Please bear with me for a couple of chapters more.

I am so freaking sorry if I have disappointed you but trust me I am trying really hard to make this story better. I hope you'll understand and stick around. :')

I love you guys so so much!!

Please do vote and comment.

Thank you for reading!

Janny❤