Let You Down By NF

Warning Throughout the story there are triggers to some people; abuse, Self harm, bullying, rape and a lot of drug and alcohol abuse

I woke up to my alarm clock at 5:30 am, I pulled my covers off of me and got up off my bed, heading into my bathroom. I turned my shower on, then brushed my teeth, I took a shower, then got dressed for school, putting on black skinny jeans, white sneakers, a black tank top and my grey NF hoodie. I recently started listening to NF, it helped a little bit, I hoped my dad wasn't still home, he was such an asshole, he beats me once in awhile when he drinks heavily and my moms busy working in the ER at the hospital, I really hate my life, I lost a lot of weight over the summer and no one has seen me since the end of 8th grade. My only friend Macy Hill who's popular (yes I'm friends with a popular girl we grew up together and she's not a bitch), hasn't seen me either since I went to Vegas to my brothers to Lose all the weight, he's a health nut. I did my hair curling it, I put on light makeup, then grabbed my backpack and cellphone. I walked out of my room and down to the kitchen, only to see my father standing there,

"Jayla you look like a whore, are you trying to get raped?"

I looked at my dad in disgust and shot back, "Excuse me? What the fuck is your problem Derek."

My dads eyes flashed with anger, pure anger, he walked up to me and punched me on the right side of my face, I dropped my backpack, causing me to get angry as he says, "Don't ever fucking call me by my name you disrespectful little bitch, and don't ever swear at me again!"

I picked up my backpack that had fell out of my hands, and didn't say a word. I didn't bother to get breakfast, I shoved my phone into my pocket and picked up my house key off the hook on the wall to my right and turned away from my dad and left the house, he yelled after me,

"You're not going to eat breakfast?!"

"Not hungry!" I yelled back and slammed the door, running down my steps and away from my house.

Angry tears fell as I ran until I was out of breath, I stopped and screamed at the top of my lungs before pulling myself together as I tried to stop the shaking from the PTSD and my face hurt like a bitch. I couldn't believe my first day to high school and I probably was supporting the nastiest bruise on my face, I thought of a excuse for a moment, I got into a fight, perfect I think that is believable. My phone chimes in my pocket pulling me from my thoughts, I pull it out seeing texts from Macy,

Hey! I'm on Hill Street I saw you run by are you okay?

And did you lose weight?

We're turning Around to pick you up my mom feels bad you know she loves you!

I look around to see if she was approaching before I responded back,

I'm on Weston Ave by the intersection, I'm not moving

I looked around, then pulled up my camera on my phone and turned it to face me and gasped, the bruise was nastier than I thought my dad hits really hard, I'm surprised I didn't fall to the ground, but I'm getting stronger I think that's why, I've been dealing with it since I started my period at 12, he's an asshole 24/7 I never have sleepovers unless him and my mom go out of town. My phone chimes pulling me from my thoughts and a horn honks causing me to jump and gasp, I started shaking slightly then shook it off, turning my head to see Macy's moms SUV pulling up next to me, I smile and open the door when she stops, I get in and buckle up as Macy turns her head to see me,

"What the fuck happened to your face?" Macy said her eyes flashing with anger.

Macy's mom Linda gasped, "language Macy and Holy shit sweetie who hit you?"

"I go in a fight with this girl in Vegas before I got home this morning, let's just say she looks worse than me," I laughed a little trying to make my lie the truth.

Macy and Linda started laughing, "Good, because if it had been a guy they'd have gotten a beating from me," Linda says seriously, she wasn't joking either, she yelled at this girls mom for bullying me and it got ugly.

"I know Lin, " I smiled, I called Macy's mom Lin because I have a mom. My mom is oblivious to all bullying and my dads beatings.

We arrive at school, Macy and I get out saying goodbye to her mom, Macy says as we walk towards the front doors of high school,

"Holy fuck, you look hot now, I think your safe from the fat jokes and bullying babe, if anything maybe guys will look at you differently, I'm making you try out for cheerleading with me this year. You dance like a girl in a music video, your voice is fucking amazing, and now your hot you always were but your dad and the bullying made you so depressed you ate a lot and not at school, then you disappear for a summer to Vegas and you make a come back."

"Shut up bitch, like any guy is going to bother with my past hanging around, Gavin's still probably bully me he has been on Facebook and Instagram, I barely have my fat pics on there, I have none of what I look like now, he hasn't seen me no one has," I say as I feel like I'm being stared at, I slowly look around and people are gasping, so I say,

"Take a picture it will last longer," rolling my eyes as they pull out their phones and snap pictures of me, then I hear my cell chime 5 times, I pull it out, seeing two notifications for Facebook and 3 for Instagram, I check the Facebook ones, it's me tagged in a picture of a new me the captions reading, Fat Layla is now Skinny! Holy fuck! Did she get in a fight? Anyone know anything? And Lay Fatty is Lay Hottie 😝 and all bruised up what happened? Anyone?. I rolled my eyes and opened the Instagram ones, reading the captions Fatty is no more! What happened to Layla's face?, Layla lost a lot of weight and is feisty! Looks like she got in a fight already, I quote Layla on this, "Take a picture it will last longer" but Layla what happened to your face?.

We step into school, my heart slows as I take in all the staring and whispering, I turn my head at the wrong moment and run into a tall solid form of Gavin Hunt who grabs into my wrist to keep me from falling as he snarls at me,

"Watch where the fu-," he stops short as he takes in what I look like now, his grip on my wrist tightens then he forcefully pushes my wrist away from him, "Watch it Fatty."

I push down the insult of the old me and snap back, "Incase your blind, I'm no longer fat you asshole so you can't call me that anymore."

Everyone starts gasping and oohing, shocked by my smart ass remark, I push past Gavin and walk away from everyone including my best friend and grab the paper in my front hoodie pocket, I unfold it and look at my schedule then go find my first class, I needed to get through this day and my smart ass remarks might get me there. Gavin is still a bully, that isn't different but I'll be okay, I got into my first class and sat near the window in the second row, my face was stinging and my thoughts were spinning, I finally fought back today against everyone, Macy walked in and pulled me from my thoughts,

"Are you okay? You've never gone back at him ever." She sits down next to me putting her backpack on her desk.

I put my phone on vibrate and put it in my pocket, Gavin walked in I looked away from him showing only the side of my face that was bruised as I talked to Macy quietly so only she could hear,

"I'm fine just fed up, I thought the summer away would finally make my life better but it's still the same, I'm still bullied so fuck it I'll be a smart ass bitch it's not fair."

I felt something hit me and land on my chair, I turned and saw Gavin sitting right behind me, I picked up the piece of paper and unfolded it,

You're right you're not fat anymore you're just a cunt now

I pushed it down, all the emotions I had, turning my expression into no emotion as I turned and said,

"Nice word use Prick, nice to know you still have no fucking heart, so that makes you a Heartless Prick."

He looked at me coldly, "Nice come back Sassy Bitch."

I turned around and ignored him as the teacher walked in.

The rest of the day he didn't say anything to me, a bruise was forming on my right wrist from where Gavin grabbed. My face stung all day and I got questioned a million times, when I got home my dad was pissed about the bruise on my wrist and he beat me leaving more bruises and my lip cut open. I locked myself in my bedroom and in the bathroom that was in my room, I didn't sleep that night I laid in the tub and cut my leg with the razor then I just watch the blood ooze out not caring, tears slide down my face, I was still a nobody, I wanted nothing more than to die. I ended my day reading all the comments from Gavin Hunt on my Instagram pictures

Then I passed out from losing some blood.