Damn it, my plan is to bring these two together, and yet William is looking at the two of us, and once again my arms are around Alex. What are you doing, Cat?

Alex stands up, and it isn't until this moment that I notice how much taller Alex is than William. I'm not sure what's going on, but Alex looks annoyed. "Chill. Something Cat just learned up upset her. Can you just back off a little here?"

William looks at me and back at Alex. "I thought we talked about this," William says to Alex.

Alex's eyes get wide. He smiles a pressed-lipped smile at me. "We'll be right back."

Then, to William's surprise, Alex drags him off, ironically, to the self-help section. They leave me wondering what the hell that was all about. Then a thought creeps in.

Is William jealous? He definitely doesn't seem to like the idea of Alex touching me. He's been giving him weird looks all day. No... that's crazy. I mean, if Alex is gay, what does William have to be worried about? It's not like he could have an interest in me, right? But then again, if William is jealous that means he DOES have feelings for Alex, and I'm doing the right thing by bringing them together.

That last thought should make me happy, but it leaves this pit in my stomach and an ache in my heart. No, Cat. You know... William or no William... Alex is not for you.

Both men return. Alex looks happier, but William now looks annoyed. Boy, would I have loved to be a fly on the wall for that conversation? Maybe I can get William to talk to me about it later. If he really has feelings for Alex, I hope he knows that will never change our friendship.

"Everything okay?" I ask, looking at both of them. Alex is all smiles and says, "Never better. So, what do you say to get the books we have here, and we go back to the apartment? We can continue to study there or call it a day. The choice is yours?"

I look over at William, who hasn't said a thing since coming back with Alex. "Is that okay with you?"

Alex elbows him. "Yeah, Cat. Whatever you want to do is good with me," he says, but he doesn't quite look at me. Okay, whatever is going on here, I have to understand it and quickly, because there is no way I'm losing my best friend over it.

"I'd love more time to spend with you today if you have the time? This has been really good for me. I think I've had a breakthrough today and I owe it all to you," I tell William, and I see his pout turn up at one end.

"Really?"

I put my arms around his waist. "I can't do this without you. You know that, right?"

Now I get a genuine smile. He stands a little straighter. "Damn right you can't and don't you even try to do this without me because it ain't gonna happen."

I give him a squeeze, and he puts an arm around me. "I love you," I tell him, and he winks at me. "Right back at you, Kitty Cat."

Alex is smiling up a storm at me. I don't know what I just did, but obviously, I've made them both happy, so... Yay, me!

"Okay." I gather the books they both have and my own. "I'm going to get in line to check out. Can one of you grab my Chai for me?"

"Got it!" Alex says.

We get into line when suddenly Candice's words of advice pop into my head. I thrust my books at William. "Ooh, I forgot a journal. I'll be right back." I toss my wallet at him.

"What's this for?"

"In case you get to the counter before I get back," I tell him as I walk away.

"But Cat, I can't buy these books," William calls after me.

"Give them here, you big baby," Alex says and swaps the drink in his hand for the books and my wallet. I mouth, thank you, before sprinting off to get a journal.

I spot one that I fall in love with immediately. It is a purple, leather-bound book with one of those beaded ribbon place markers. It's embossed with a beautiful butterfly and the saying, "Just when the caterpillar thought her world was over, she spread her wings to fly."

This journey certainly feels like a transformation of sorts. I hug the book and run back to the line. They are already up at the counter but thankfully haven't rung up yet.

"Got it! I'm here! Thank you!" I tell them and Alex hands me back my wallet and William looks relieved.

The cashier has a look like suddenly his world was set right again. Trying to figure why two gay men would be interested in pregnancy books was probably an overload to his system.

I pay with my credit card and happily take my purchases with me. "What do you say, boys, after studying, pizza for lunch? I'll treat this time."

Both William and Alex agree. "Sure, why not?" William says, taking my arm in his. "I think we are going to make a great team. Don't you?"

I look back at Alex, wanting to include him. "I certainly do." I smile at him, he smiles back at me, and I squeeze William's arm. "Thank you. I haven't felt this positive in a long time."

"That's what I'm here for, Baby Girl. You should know that by now."

"I do, I guess I just forgot for a little while."

"Well then, I'm glad I got this chance to remind you. You mean a lot to me, Cat. If it's within my power, I won't let anything bad happen to you."

"I know. You know I think you're awesome, right?"

"Well, that's hard not to think..." He flips the collar of his coat up and brushes his hand down the fur, "I mean, it really goes without saying."

I laugh out loud at his gesture. "Humility is not really your strong suit."

"Hard not to shine when you're a star, baby."

I can't argue with that. We get in the car, and this time I choose to ride up front with William. He's in a much better mood by the time we get back to the apartment.

A few hours later, with pizza devoured and knowledge gained, we part ways. I'm truly grateful to William for everything he has done for me today, and I promise to see him in class on Monday.

"Are you sure you're ready to go back?" Alex asks me as I come in from seeing William off.

I clean up after our pizza party. "Why not? I don't want to get behind. Tomorrow I'll catch up on the last of my work and well... I really can't afford any more time off. I have a GPA to maintain and a scholarship to keep secure."

"You're here on scholarship?" 

"Yeah, I was valedictorian of my high school, and I got a full scholarship to attend here. Since Liam got a sports scholarship first, it pretty much, solidified me coming here, too."

"You two were really in deep then, huh?" Alex asks, helping me clean up and following me into the kitchen.

"Liam and I?" I laugh without humor. "We were inseparable. At least I thought we were." I hate that it still hurts to talk about him. I put the dishes in the sink and take a few deep breaths to keep the tears at bay.

Alex turns me around, his hands still resting on my shoulders. "I'm sorry that he hurt you like this. I..." He sighs and his hands drop to his sides. "I should go get the rest of the dishes."

He moves away from me and goes out into the other room, leaving me to wonder what he was really going to say. My phone is ringing, and it's currently sitting on the coffee table. Alex picks it up and hands it to me.

It's Olivia, a friend of mine from my sorority. "Oh, thank God, Girl! You picked up. You need to get here quick. I mean, like ten seconds ago, quick. Jenny has totally screwed up the fundraiser!"

"WHAT! I had everything done! The details are taken care of! How could she...?"

"Simple, Cat, she's gone with her own idea."

My heart plummets, "What idea?"

"You'll see. You need to get here! Please Cat, before she ruins everything."

"I'm on my way."

"What is it? What's wrong?" Alex asks.

"One of my sorority girls went rogue on our fundraiser idea. I don't know what she's doing, but it's not the idea I set up for today." I rub my temples. "It is my own stupid fault for thinking that idiot could handle things. I really didn't think she could screw this up but, surprise, surprise, once again I am wrong."

I am about to grab my coat when Alex grabs my arm and stops me. "First, slow down. Second, fix your makeup..." This makes me pause and I walk to the bathroom. "Shit!"

My cover-up needs some refreshing. The lines on my face have lightened considerably since that violent bout of vomiting, but they haven't completely disappeared. I set to the task and I see him leaning against the bathroom door frame in the mirror.

"Thank you, and is there a third thing?"

"Do you want me to come?"

I pause for a moment and our eyes meet in the mirror. "I don't know," I admit. "I'm not sure what I'm walking into, but it's my sorority and my girls. I think I can handle this on my own."

He looks a little disappointed, but he nods and walks away. Honestly, I wish I can keep him glued to my side. I feel so much better when he's around, and my anxiety is through the roof right now. However, I am not ready to explain him to anyone, even as just as a friend. The last thing I need is rumors being spread. I have enough drama to deal with right now.