(FINALLY!!! Holy Freaking Hannah?!?!?!? I am so Sorry you guys for the stupid Long wait??? 

Anyways please forgive me and Enjoy this next Chappy!! OMGOSH!!!!! I totally posted this Chappy YESTERDAY?!?!?! I promised that it would be up On Friday Then I Open this up and I'm Like, "WHAT IN EQUESTRIA IS THIS DOING HERE?!? Frick my jewels are going To be so P.O'ed!!!!" Please don't throw anything?!? unless it's pie! Then throw All the pie You want!!. . . . . . Well just not too hard, cause that'll Hurt. . . Opps tangents. . . .uhhhh, to the chappy!!!)

Raph's feelings: I could barely hear anything being said. I couldn't feel anything or anyone around me. My fist shook annoyingly against my knees. Breathing was hard and rash like my lungs couldn't hold any air. I refused to look at any of them. Especially when Mikey started to cry, I nearly looked up at that point, but shaking my head I kept it down.

There was a deafening silence that followed. I didn't care. I wasn't going to be the one to break it. For once, I liked the silence. Then Don cleared his throat and started talking a shake in his voice, "I'm like Mikey I can't handle not helping when I know I can. The way I handle difficult situations is with my hands, I build, take apart and build things. Over and over again until my head has come up with a different solution." I had the urge to roll my eyes at his babblings.

He continued stronger, "I'm sorry I didn't try to help out earlier, I knew something was amiss but I didn't think much of it." I suppressed a growl at his stupid confession. "I honestly thought that it was a minor detail that had been resolved days ago. But," With that something in Don's voice changed making me glance over at him. He stayed kneeling but no longer hunched over, he was sitting up straight with a solid form, making it clear that he meant business and to listen, "I am not taking the blame here, like Leo and Mikey said 'You' should've said something to us a LONG time ago. Please just promise us that this won't ever happen again, I don't think any of us could take it if something like this happens again. . . . " He stopped and gave a little shake before loosing part of his resolve, "I know I won't."

I scarcely saw each of my brothers before I ducked my head back down. The sight of hurt, pain and sadness written on them was enough of a picture for my fire to burn more. 

I felt heated.

 Angry and beyond furious.

I was boiling and steaming.

Pinned down and immobilized because I couldn't do anything.

 And I felt exhausted. Closing my eyes I shut myself away. Everyone had spoken but me. I didn't want to. If I opened my mouth. . . there was no way to know what would happen. 

"Raphael?" I shifted slightly at the sound of Master Splinter, "It is your turn my son." I gave a very slight nod but I kept my eyes and mouth closed.

"Raphael, it is not good for one to hold such strong negative emotions in ones' self." I stiffened even more as he patted my shell softly, "You have permission to 'let it out' as you boys say."

I kept silent. I didn't want to talk to the girls. They don't deserve to hear me.

"DANG IT RAPH!" I jerked a little upon hearing Lilly bark, "JUST SAY IT!"

Swallowing, I opened my eyes to see the artful carpeted dojo floor then up to Lilly's hands. She was leaning forward her bright yellow eyes shining with tears of frustration and anger. "Say What."

"What Ever The Heck You're Thinking About! Just Say It Raph!" She growled her tail flicking behind her, like she had any right to be angry.

I was just told that a maniac has been stalking our friends and family members for weeks! That Teddi was attacked by that SAME maniac not two hours ago. Then I was told that "Oh we were keeping you guys safe because it was your birthday! Don't worry about us" well look where that got you! Before this was going down I also find my brother with MY girlfriend who is sobbing her heart out?! She refuses to tell me what's going on, so I have to think that worst! It didn't help AT ALL when Mikey came back with a broken equally crying Teddi?!?!? I mean what the Shell is happening here?!

I heard Lilly growl again, "Shut it Lilly."

Her eyes bent down in hurt as she huffed out her remaining air, "Why?"

"Because I Said So!" I sneered.

"Not Good Enough Raph."

I  threw my hands up, "WHAT THE SHELL DO YOU WANT FROM ME WOMAN!?"

Shaking she folded her arms matching my glare, "Don't be dumb Raph."

My eyes widened as I stared at her, glancing over the other girls I snapped, "Me, Don't Be Dumb? ME!? Do Ya Know How Incredibly STUPID That Was!? Just How Shelled This All Is!? WE Are The Ninjas Here NOT You! We're The Ones That're Suppose Ta Protect You All, NOT The Other Way Around!" I jumped up my gaze shooting from one person to the next, "Do Ya Have ANY Idea How Stupid We Feel? Knowin That You All knew Somethin Important And Didn't Say A WORD ABOUT IT!! And While Yer At It Why Don't Ya Go Rub It In By Tellin Us, 'It was you're mutation day.'  Like It Was Our Fault? BULL CRAP!" taking in heaping gulps of air I tried to glare at them all making them know just how hurt and furious I was. When my gaze landed on Lilly her golden eyes blinked open letting another stream of tears run down her face. She sniffed sadly and nodded.  

I sighed in understanding, she made me blow up on purpose to help me get rid of some anger. Not all of it though. I hissed the rest of the air in my lungs out, "Don't . . . just . . . . please don't." I couldn't take it anymore, spinning on my heal I stalked to the doors and slammed them open. Walking away before I could say anything more. 

Regaining Raph's trust: Serina's pov 

I grunted, "Come on Raph I said I already give up! You win now LET ME UP!" I commanded as my face and body were pressed firmly into the dojo floor. Why had I even given this any thought at all?! Stupid Serina! Next time you have a brilliant idea Shut Your Fat Mouth! Speaking of fat, that is why I agreed to this in the first place! I agreed to have extra training with Raph first of all because with NYC cap guy running around (Teddi Came up with the name not me) it wouldn't hurt to have more training. 

Thinking of Teddi, that's the second reason why I'm doing this, she bought me a size too small wedding dress. Now some would say, "Don't worry about it just get your money back or ask for another one?" The place she got it from was super junky and real penny pinchers, so of course they said no to refunds! Then they 'conveniently' didn't have any sizes bigger, which was B.S. but I couldn't do anything. Not only that the only choice they gave was that they could order another one, but that it would take another three months to get here and that I would have to pay the SUPER EXPENSIVE shipping cost?!? I nearly sued there butts, seeing as how I had already spent an arm, a leg and my head for the darn dress, and that was the cheapest I could find too!

Raph pushed my arm a centimeter higher bringing me back to the task at hand, "Focus Serina!" He huffed sitting on my back while pinning both my thighs down and right arm on my back my other arm was under me. 

"I AM! And I DID You Shell Head!!" I roared, " I already said I give up!"

"NYC CAP WOULDN'T! Now get out of my hold!" I screamed and pushing slightly up with my left arm his leg slid an inch off my right leg. Good thing I took gymnastics as a kid and that I was part rabbit. Kicking my leg out of his hold, I bent my knee as far as I could and kicked him in the side and effectively off me. Still keeping my foot on him, I pushed myself up until I stood him one foot on his chest the other over his collar bone and neck.

"Enough Raph! I asked you to train me not rip my limbs off my body!" I yelled holding my throbbing arm to my chest. 

He frown, "Get off me."

I snorted and obliged, "See, training means you GET OFF When ASKED!"

He growled and sat up rubbing his hands over his face, refusing to look at me. I glared at him, He had been on and off with his attitude for months now. I didn't really get it, what made him flip out like this? Sighing I sat down in front of him, "What's eating you?"

 He huffed looking at me sideways. He seemed to give it some thought, arguing with himself before one side won. "Just somethin Teddi said."

I frowned. "What did Teddi say, cause she says a lot." I tried to joke, it didn't work.

He shook his head miffed, "Nevermind."

I frowned, that's not what I meant to do, "Sorry Raph, I'll be quiet."

He argued with himself again then plopped his face in his hands, "She was talkin with Lilly. She had another nightmare. I swear she has them every night, but she never tells me about it! It's like she doesn't trust me? Then--" He growled cutting himself off in frustration.

"You're worried about her and what else?" I asked carefully.

"All of ya." His voice cracked so slightly that if it wasn't me he was talking to, I doubt someone else would've heard it.

"Raph, it's okay to worry about us."

"It's not just that! It's. . . a ton a things." He mumbled closing himself off again.

I smiled, he was doing the exact same thing that I do. He was beating himself up by raising himself up and pulling the rug out from under himself. His anger was more like a lite match next to a gas can, any slight change of wind and that thing would blow.It was a prideful issue that made both of us blow up, well him more than me, I usually keep it all in until I boiled out of control. My smile grew as my thoughts continued, 'what do I do when I had reach my boiling points?'

Standing up I put my hand out, "Come on get up."

He glared at me, "No thanks."

I rolled my eyes, "No point in arguing with me dummy, just get your shelled butt up, we're going somewhere."

Even though he was stubborn and visibly fuming at my name calling, his curiosity won out as he placed a hand in mine. "Where?" He asked following me out and towards the closet that was next to the dojo. 

Opening it I snatched a hoodie and threw it at him, "You'll need these." I said throwing a pair of thick pants too.

He growled and shoved them on as I slung my jacket over my sweaty tank and jeans. I grabbed a beanie and turning around I managed to slide it over his head before he could do or say anything. He steamed glaring at me in annoyance, I held in my snicker at how childish and cute he looked at the moment. Almost like a plush doll! Or a very angry toddler.

"What are ya thinkin about!" he snapped.

I slapped my hand over my mouth hiding my wobbly grin from view, "Nothing. Let's get going."

"Are you two heading out?" I looked over to see Lilly, her head cocked to the side.

I heard Raph swallow as his heart escalated slightly, like it always did when he was around her, "Yeah we are."

"Oh, where are you off to?" She asked holding her hands behind her back.

"Uhh." 

I quickly jumped in, "Me and Raph decided to do something different for training today, we'll be right back."

"In time for midnight right?" she questioned hesitantly.

I looked at my watch, 10:46 pm, "We'll try, we might be a little bit late though."

She looked to us both giving a quick nod, "Okay, just be careful, oh and while you're out could you guys get some more soda?"

"What for?" Raph asked confused.

Her face went down in an annoyed almost board expression, "Two names, Mikey and Casey, that's why."

Raph growled, "Those idiots."

I chuckled only those two would drink all of our soda, "Wait how much did they drink?"

"All of it." She huffed putting a hand on her hip.

"ARE YOU SERIOUS!? THAT WAS LIKE SIX BOTTLES AND I JUST GOT THEM!?!?" I screeched.

"Yeah," She smirked, "They figured three and three was good enough, it didn't help that the others were cheering them on yelling 'Chug, Chug, Chug!' Granted no one knew they were drinking the last two bottles, until Teddi opened the fridge and--" She shrugged her shoulders letting reason take hold of what Teddi had found.

I growled low, "I hope they get sick."

Lilly grinned, "Mikeys' passed out on the couch, and Casey couldn't finish his last bottle and ended up in the bathroom." She chuckled darkly, "I think he's still in there getting an earful from both April and Teddi."

"Shell heads." Raph smirked.

"Well karma," I turned around and headed to the exit, "See you later Lilly."

"Bye Serina." I heard Raph's heart beat spike suddenly as Lilly giggled, "Bye Red, nice hat by the way."

He growled, "Minx." I smiled when I felt his presence beside me.

When we got out of the lair I tilted my head to the turtle and chuckled, "I didn't know Lilly was wearing lipstick?"

He flinch and started to rub his face furiously, trying to get the nonexistent mark off. I laughed when he looked over his sleeve with confusion. He jerked towards me, "SERINA!?" 

I stuck my tongue out and started to run, "Come On Slow Turtle!" 

"I'll show YOU slow!" I screamed again fearfully putting on a burst of speed, maybe I should lay off the name calling for a bit.  

Time Skippy~~~~

I smiled at the large paper in my hands, the title on it was Shredder and oddly enough it looked like it had been through one. "Wow that things dead." Raph chuckled next to me.

"Yeah it was my first one after I got back from the cabin." Raph shifted a bit and place a hand on my shoulder.

I looked over at him as he gave my shoulder a comforting squeeze, he then smirked, "Come on and show me how these things work."

I smiled and pulled out two more sheets writing FEAR in big letters across the top of both before clipping them on the contraption. I then looked over to Raph holding the gun away from us both. The guys there know me pretty well and they let me close up sometimes. I go to the shooting range whenever I reach a boiling point, or I just need something to take my mind off of certain things. Also it's a nicer way of exacting revenge; Hey some people write nasty letters and rip them up, I write names and shoot the living daylights out of them.

"Okay so the first thing you need to know is that guns are dangerous tools that can kill."

Just in Case you've never seen/handled a gun Before.

Raph snorted, "Tell me somethin I don't know."

"Don't be sassy! It is actually fairly easy to forget how dangerous these are. Luckily I don't have to worry about you forgetting that, seeing as how you carry a deadly weapon around with you every day. But remember unlike your Sai, this can blow up, so be careful." He nodded as I continued, "Now the basics you need to know are Trigger, Hammer, Front Sight, Magazine and most importantly the Safety. Oh also never point this end at anybody unless your a cop."

"Gee thanks teach, I had no idea." Raph said folding his arms and leaning against the stall.

"Sassy again." He just smiled, as I rolled my eyes, "The trigger is obviously the thing you pull to fire. The Hammer has no mercy so keep your hands far from away it will cut you and take a chunk out of your hand if you're not careful. The Hammer is the reason the bullet goes flying, it's the one that causes the spark. Front Sight helps you aim, Magazine helps keep your bullets in  the gun, make sure this is clicked in or. . . .yeah something 'fun' will happen just make sure it's clicked in. Then the Safety has two features, on and off. When you are done using the gun or you need to reload, put it on Safety." I quickly showed him how it all worked than made him do it twice before I was satisfied.

I handed him the other case, "And don't worry about bullets, I have plenty."

He tilted his head, "Ya do this a lot don't ya?"

I shrugged as he moved over to another stall, "Yeah, it's become a bit of a hobby."

We waited until the papers were a couple of meters away before starting, after six shots, I leaned back to look at Raph. Grinning like a maniac he looked over at me, "THIS IS SO COOL! WAY BETTER THAN HITTING THE PUNCHING BAG!" He yelled, both of us having earmuffs on to get rid of the noise. Well I had ear plugs and muffs, my poor ears wouldn't be able to handle the echo most shooting ranges had. Laughing he clicked another magazine in, stepping side ways he shot at the paper like some renegade. I rolled my eyes, I had told him to use both hands, eh oh well.

After a bit of that and two more paper people, I looked over at Raph, "Hey?"

He cocked his head and looked over to me, "What is it?" He asked taking his muffs off.

Giving him a soft smile I placed my gun down, "It's okay. We are going to be okay." 

He stared at me for a second then looking to our tattered paper figures smiled, "Yeah, I know. Just wished I could do more."

"Well, it is New Years Eve, have you made a Resolution?"

He chuckled halfheartedly, "Nah I've never done that."

"We could make one together, that way we can help the other to keep it?"

He sighed, thought it over for a mere second before giving me a smile that I had never seen on him before. A dimple making a rare appearance on his cheek; his smile was full of kindness and real happiness. Not the kind of happiness that one gets when you win a hard race or when you get the last piece of your favorite pizza. No this type of gleaming smile was one filled with passion, determination and love. I've never had siblings, I gained kind of two of them, with Leo and Mikey like my little brothers/good friends, and Donnie now my future husband. But with Raph it always more of a friend on the verge of best friend. With tonight I think he jumped over the friend and best friend titles all the way to the title of Brother.

"I like that, could we?" He asked

I smiled, "Yeah and we'll do it in our own way, stay here I'll be right back." I ran out of there and to the back rooms grabbing hold of two large bags before running back to the room. I looked over and saw our tattered paper people still hanging far out, perfect.

"What are we doing now?" He asked coming over and taking hold of one bag.

"Something I haven't done in a very long time." I unzipped my bag and took hold of the shotgun, slowly loading in a shell. Fond memories of my grandfather came to me, my only family member that I liked. He was the reason me and mom went to Russia for so many vacations as well. While she gallivanted through stores, and other fancy smancy stuff with her coworkers, Grandpa would take me camping teaching me guns, survival, and Russian.  "These are a little different." I said clipping the gun back into place with a defining snap. I smiled feeling like grandfather was there with me, I loved that man.

"No kidding, it's a shotgun!?" He snickered, unzipping his and carefully looking it over.

"Not just any shotgun Raphael, a Pump-Action Shotgun." I made my point by jerking the pump up and down quickly, "Loaded and ready. We have three minutes before midnight."

As he loaded his I told about how to fire and watch for the kick back, especially with these old boys. I rolled up my beanie and stuck it on the back, seeing this Raph quickly did the same. I glanced at my watch, 11:59 pm. 

"I promise," I glanced over at Raph, he stood facing the paper, gun aimed high and ready. "To always do my best and give my best for those I love." Something shiny ran down his cheek, he barely moved. 

I nodded and raised my own, "And to not blame ourselves for our faults, to keep moving forward, and to smile more." At that he glanced to me, giving me a smile and a nod before both guns went off completely obliterating the fragile paper to confetti. "Happy New Year Raph."

"Happy New Year Rina." 

(There we go my little Jewels!!! Oh Gosh that Took a little Longer than I Thought it Would but there we go!!! Hope you Guys like it!!! Get ready For the next Chappy. . . . heheheheheh. . . . . Wow I just reread that, do I sound Evil To you guys??? Oh well, MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!)