Before I get started, please know I was forced by gun point by vannzy to rewrite this, it's against my will.

It was 4:34 Am on a dark and gloomy Saturday night. Dave just got off work he had to stay back as night guard for his store called k-Mart. His discord kitten/lover walker was just getting ready for work at his new job Duncan's which for some reason opens at 5 am. As Evan was scrubbing behind his ears and dave came behind him.

"Hi my walkey poop" dave said in his uwu voice

"Oh dave I didn't hear you come in" walker says as he is making sure he looks nice after his last jobs at Wendy's ended horribly due to him lighting it on fire because someone wrote a fan fic about him.

"Good luck today my little preacher boy, my walky look my littler sharter you precious queef" dave said as he tussled walkers hair

"Davey daddy, my sunshine, my moon fart , my lover, ohhhh babyyy oh babby 👵🏻🧔🏾‍♂️" blushing walker said.

THREE HOURS LATER

On a hot Saturday morning Dave decided to visit his walker while he was working at Duncan donuts.

"Hi thank you for choosing Duncan's this is _____ (speaker static) what can I get for you" said a voice, a squeaker but Dave pushed past that.

"H-h-hi" Dave was stunned who was that voice belonging to "can I get a donut with Extra cream"

"Your total is going to be 6.9 pull up to the first window"

Dave was ecstatic to be able to meet the mysterious man. As he pulled to the window he sees a emo boy, his perfect muller, his trump 2020 hat even though it's 2022, his missing tooth, and his baby blue incest colored eyes. Dave just knew he had to make a move.

"Here you go dadd- kind sir" Dave said handing him a 69420 dollar tip "do you wanna get dinner later"

"Ummm sure my number is (806) 268-2797 call me sugar tits"

(Please do call that number it's a ex and I hate him)

"Okay baby cakes WHATS your name" Dave said to the emo employee with his period pad red hair and the huge ass forehead

"It's vannzy" vannzy said

This is how Dave knew life was fixing to change.