Guilt

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CASPIAN

Monitors beeped, the sound obnoxious in an otherwise silent room. Tomblike. Caspian could think of no other word to describe the atmosphere. The air was stale and antiseptic, and the windowless walls were painted a flat, dull gray. The same dull gray as the blanket covering the patient that hadn't moved in the twenty-four hours he'd been lying in the bed.

The burns and cuts that had covered Raff's body were half healed. He looked like a snake, covered in scabs that flaked off as wounds closed at a rate that shocked the selkie. All in all, the man didn't look half bad considering his arm had been crushed, his jaw broken, and his lungs collapsed when Caspian pulled him from the Starless headquarters. Even a fae would've perished with such damage, but werewolves were perhaps the hardiest species in the supernatural world. By tomorrow morning, he would be restored to full health.

"Raff, oh gods no!" Mariah cried as she barreled into the room. The young shifter gathered Raff's hand in hers, kissing it with a tenderness that shocked Caspian. He'd suspected she was attracted to the man, but the simple gesture spoke volumes about her true feelings. "I thought she was going to bargain with him."

"Our queen doesn't take kindly to her plans being disturbed." He kept his answer vague.

"Our queen is a bitch with mood swings," Mariah snarled. The blow he directed at her cheek sent her careening into the wall.

"I will cut out your tongue if ever you speak like that again."

Talons sprouted from her fingers, cracking the fake nails she insisted on wearing. Dark swirls of leopard print formed on her dusky skin as she wrestled with the urge to shift. Partial shifting was difficult for many of the oldest shifters, and Mariah's unique ability to become any animal made control even harder.

"Be careful vermin," Caspian cautioned, "I'm the queen's favored pet. Harm me and you will die."

She gnashed her elongated teeth, but the spots faded and her hands returned to normal. Stroking Raff's brow with tenderness, she asked, "If the queen chose to kill him, why are you patching him up?"

"If you must know, the queen didn't intend for this to happen. The foolish Beta she promoted after Mac's death detonated the bomb. Raff is very lucky I was tasked with keeping tabs on him."

Apparently, it's been in place for sometime. The Starless pack always suspected the Orion pack would come for them.

"So a nobody wins if they can't win philosophy?"

"Something like that. The Fae Queen requested I salvage what I could of the poor man. She has other things to deal with at the moment- a Guardian issue, but she didn't want Raff going to waste while she was away."

"What of the cure she spoke of?" Mariah asked, hope coloring her words.

"How do you even know about that?"

"I have good ears."

He resisted the urge to strike her again-the bruise blossoming on her cheek stirring something akin to guilt in his gut. He didn't like it. "Be careful where you put those ears or they'll go the way of your tongue."

"Will we keep him here?"

"You'd like that, but no. We'll keep him sedated until he's healed, and then we'll drop him off somewhere to make his way home."

"So he can go back to his selkie whore?"

The guilt vanished. Wrapping his fingers around her throat, he slammed her into the cinderblock wall. Unlike Meribella, he couldn't shape water away from the ocean. Only the Star Blessed could do that after their powers were completely unleashed. But the male of his kind had their own deadly gifts, and he could see the terror in the shifter's obsidian eyes.

"I'm guessing you know what I can do with my hands," he whispered, loosening his grip just enough so that he could stroke his thumb along her throat. "Just one thought, and I can send venom coursing through your bloodstream. Now, depending on my mood- I could choose to paralyze you. We usually use this when we're hunting criminals. You see, the selkie people prefer to punish people based on the crime committed so we make sure we apprehend them alive.

"But during battle, we use a much more vicious version. In small enough doses, it takes days to kill, but it's always fatal. I've been told it feels like having a blow torch lit inside of you. Enemies have peeled the skin from their bodies trying to make it stop. They don't even feel the damage they're doing to themselves because the other pain is so great. You've pushed me over my limit today, but if you take back your insult to my clan's leader, I will let you live."

"I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. She's not a whore."

He relaxed his grip. "Now get out of my sight before I change my mind."

Trembling, Mariah gave Raff one last, longing look before she left the room. Caspian waited until he was certain she couldn't hear him before he roared and threw the room's single chair. It splintered against the wall, but it didn't ease the self-hatred rioting in his soul. He glanced down at his hands, remembering the last person he'd killed with them. Eyes the color of the tranquil waters surrounding Selkie Island at dusk- smoky, star speckled turquoise, haunted every sleep, and that's why he had to do this.

Out of his pocket, he pulled the vials Morgan had given him before leaving. He studied the glimmering potions. One, she'd called a cure, but after explaining, he recognized the trap she'd set. A half fae could down this elixir and kill off their human self. Their DNA would be completely rewritten, but they might not be the same. A risk most were willing to take, the queen had explained. Especially star crossed lovers. How she'd laughed at her joke.

Looking down at Raff's face, he thought of all the times he'd seen the man with Meribella. He didn't know much about the mating habits of werewolves, outside of the unfortunate death sentence they offered human women, but when selkies chose mates, it was for life. He'd yet to find his own mate, but he knew the look a man had when he found his partner. It was the same look Raff had in his eyes.

Caspian scrubbed his hand through his hair and exhaled. The chemistry between them was evident to even the weak sighted mortals. They were like planets caught in one another's gravitational pull, and if left to their own devices, a collision would occur. Temptation could only be fought for so long.

He looked at the other vial- the one Morgan had offered Meribella the night she met with Mac. The liquid was part of the ill gotten gains from the Fae Queen's experiments on the kidnapped Children. It was nearly identical in appearance, but he preferred this one over the other. His selkie princess would gain the ability to shift, but she'd retain her human DNA- meaning Raff still couldn't touch her. But in the end, both would suit his purpose.

Meribella was needed on Selkie Island, and Morgan needed the girl's powers. It was those two things alone that kept Raff alive. She might survive leaving him- a heart could beat if it was broken, but if he had died, she would have given up. The bond they shared would see to that.

Raff stirred, his mouth thinned and his hand gripped the sheets. "Meribella." Her name poured from his mouth, the syllables sharp and jagged from his damaged vocal cords.

Flicking the lights off, he called for the nurse they'd employed to watch over the werewolf. Handing her an envelope, he said, "See to it that he remains heavily sedated. I don't want to chance him waking up before he's dropped off tomorrow. He's to have no memory of how he survived. Is that clear? Make sure this is left on his person, though."

"Yes Caspian. Anything else?"

He stared into the darkened room. He almost felt sorry for the bastard. For what was to come. "No, that will be all."

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