It struck Alan that Fiza still loved him, and his heart ached with the weight of their unresolved feelings. He didn't know what to do. She was married, pregnant, and he couldn't get involved again; it would only make things worse.

"Fiza..." he whimpered, his voice quivering, "I can't... We can't..." He turned to leave again.

But her words stopped him in his tracks. "Why did you leave me, Alan?" Fiza whispered, her eyes locking onto his with an intensity that held him in place.

"Fiza, you were married. Faisal sent me the video. And I called your father immediately. He confirmed that it was true. And I had promised him, Fiza, that I wouldn't stand in the way of your happiness," Alan explained, feeling helpless and torn.

"What about all the promises you made to me? We could have figured it out together. But you gave up on us!" Fiza's voice was low, barely audible, but it carried a powerful undercurrent of pain and longing.

"Fiza, why are you bringing this up now? It's over. We are over. You have to move on." Alan pleaded. It was pointless. He had some scruples. He was not going to have an affair with a married woman.

Fiza stared at Alan, her heart aching with a mixture of regret and longing.

Alan, unable to maintain the intense eye contact, looked away.

"I heard that congratulations are in order? You are going to be a mother soon?" Alan asked, breaking the silence that had enveloped them.

"Yes, thank you," Fiza responded formally, a stark contrast to the depth of their shared history and feelings. She wondered how he had heard about the adoption.

The confirmation of her pregnancy hung in the air like a weight, and Alan couldn't help but feel a sense of finality wash over him. She was carrying another man's child. She had no right to question his decisions or his life anymore.

Fiza, too, couldn't escape the reality of their situation. Alan had said they were over, and the passage of almost a year had only solidified that painful truth. They both carried their love and regret like invisible scars.

"Are you seeing someone?" Fiza finally asked, unable to contain her curiosity any longer.

The words hung in the air, carrying with it all of their shared history and the countless promises they had once made to each other.

Alan hesitated, his gaze shifting from Fiza to the ground and back again. He struggled to find the right words. "It doesn't make a difference if I am or not," he finally replied, his tone heavy with unresolved emotions.

As they stood there, the unspoken truths and unfulfilled promises of their past forming a wall between them.

Alan had taken steps to address his own issues, seeking help from a psychotherapist to tackle his impulse control problems and PTSD stemming from his previous relationship with Aarthy.

Yet, he couldn't help but wonder if things might have been different if he had sought help sooner, sparing Fiza the pain they now both carried. Maybe the baby she was carrying could have been his.

Seeing her again, so vulnerable, was tearing Alan apart. He wished he had encountered her in happier circumstances, where she could smile freely and he could know that she had moved on. The pain of their past still lingered, a wound that hadn't fully healed.

"It does," he heard her say, her words reaching deep into his heart. He noticed her gaze on his wrist as he snapped the rubber band again.

"Kiss me one more time," Fiza whispered, her voice filled with longing.

Alan's shock was evident, his heart aching at the thought of tasting her lips once more, of feeling her warm breath on his face, her body against his. The strawberry taste of her lip gloss, the sound of her moans - it all rushed back to him.

But he knew he couldn't give in to this impulse, as much as he yearned for it. It was a path they couldn't tread again, one that had led them to pain and heartbreak. He continued to snap his rubber band over and over again until it cut through his skin, causing him an intense burn. He resolved to make an appointment with his psychologist tomorrow.

Fiza noticed Alan's wrist had become red from the repeated snapping of the rubber band. In the dim light of the garden, the marks were visible, and it worried her. The aversion technique was meant to discourage certain behaviors or thoughts, not to cause self-harm. She reached out to touch his wrist gently, but he pulled away, his pain evident. He abruptly turned around and walked away.

She watched as his figure retreated away from her. He disappeared into the darkness, just like he always did, shattering her already broken heart into a million pieces.

Tears streamed down Alan's face, falling without restraint. He knew he could never love again, not in the way he had loved Fiza. Every day was a battle to push her out of his thoughts. He had gone through the stages of grief - denial, anger, bargaining - but he still hadn't reached acceptance. His progress had been undone tonight. Memories of their time together flooded back, especially the words she had spoken at the construction site.

"You are my husband, and I am your wife."

Yet now, she was someone else's wife. He had filed the marriage license papers promptly upon arriving in Bangalore, but they had been robbed of the chance to be together. Her father had ensured that. The pain was unbearable.

Ten months ago, Alan had believed he had not been good enough for her. He hadn't fought for her. But now he was in a better place. He was in better control of his life and his emotions. But he had lost the one person who mattered the most to him.

He wondered if he would ever see her again.

"Fiza, are you okay?" Shahana asked her as she returned to the venue, a little while after Alan had left her.

"I will be. I just..." Fiza's voice trailed off, and she looked around instinctively for Alan.

"He's gone, Fiza, I saw him checking out and grabbing his helmet," Shahana told her.

"I need to go home. I'll take an Uber, okay?" Fiza told Shahana. "I can't face Varsha and Priya right now. Please tell them I left."

Fiza called an Uber and walked to the hotel lobby. Something shiny caught her eye. It was their award for "Hottest couple." It lay on the floor, broken, as though someone had stomped on it. Just like their relationship, and her life, it was shattered.

She didn't know what made her do it, but she picked up the pieces and put them in her handbag. She had gotten through ten months without him; she would survive, she told herself. She still had her career, her coursework. She was looking forward to the adoption paperwork coming through. She would be a mother soon. She loved being a doctor to kids, but it would be great to have one of her own - someone she could love and nurture unconditionally.

***

A few months later, Fiza was attending a dinner hosted by a pharmaceutical representative. They had invited a group of doctors to a rooftop restaurant and were educating them on the new indications for which the drug was approved and why their brand was superior to others.

As the dinner concluded, Fiza excused herself and went to the restroom to wash her hands.

"Mole, Fiza?" She heard a familiar voice behind her. She turned to see Alan's mother standing there, and her eyes widened with shock. She had not been prepared for this encounter.

In her mind, she knew when she took up the post in Bangalore that there was a possibility of running into Alan. Maybe she had even hoped to catch glimpses of him. But nothing had prepared her for the hurt she felt, thinking of what could have been, when she had seen him at the reunion. And now his mother.

"Fiza, are you okay?" His mother asked with concern. Fiza's tears were falling uncontrollably, and she couldn't stop them.

"Just breathe, mole, just breathe," his mother consoled her, hugging her as she cried into her shoulder. "It's going to be okay, it's just the hormones," she reassured her.

Fiza blinked, her tears still flowing, and straightened up to look at her. She noticed that Alan's mother also had tears in her eyes.

"Aunty, I... I was just surprised," Fiza mumbled, trying to regain her composure. "I didn't expect to see you here." She wiped her eyes with her dupatta.

"It's okay. It happens," Alan's mother replied with a warm smile. "I remember when I was carrying Alex, I would cry at the drop of a hat." She patted her own belly gently.

Fiza frowned, puzzled by the mention of hormones. It didn't quite make sense to her.

Fiza couldn't help but smile at the memory of how, in the past, her first question in response to any problem was always, "Is Fiza pregnant?" It was a peculiar thought, and it brought a small, wistful smile to her face.

She chuckled softly, and Alan's mother, sensing the change in her demeanor, looked a bit confused.

"Aunty, you're mistaken," Fiza said gently. She glanced at her own reflection in the mirror. "I'm not pregnant." She instinctively checked her abdomen, wondering if perhaps she had gained weight. She had still been doing those exercises that Alan had taught her.

"But Alan told me he met you at the reunion. He said you were pregnant," Alan's mother insisted. She had been concerned about her son after his emotional encounter with Fiza at the reunion. Alan had shared some details of their meeting, and she had been worried about his well-being.

"I'm not pregnant," Fiza confirmed. She needed to talk to Alan, to clear up this confusion.

"Aunty, I need to talk to Alan," Fiza pleaded, realizing the urgency of the situation.

"Fiza, I don't think that's a good idea. He has suffered so much this last year. He... he tried to take his own life. I can't bear to see him go through that again," Alan's mother said, her eyes filled with a deep concern for her son.

Fiza was stunned. The revelation hit her like a tidal wave. Alan had tried to end his own life? She was ashamed of herself. She had been angry at him for not reaching out to her, for ghosting her instead of working with her to find a way out of this.

She had been angry that he had promised her that he would be her husband but had left her. She hadn't considered what it would've cost him to do that. She had held on to the belief that since it was Alan who had left her, that it was up to him to reach out to her. She had needed to hold on to the only thing she had left - her self-respect.

"What did he do?" She asked in a whisper.

His mother hesitated. "He rode his bike, without a helmet, didn't stop at red lights. He kept going faster until he somehow came to his senses."

Fiza closed her eyes. She could imagine him doing that. He was impulsive, and she was sure that he would have done that on a whim, when he had been feeling his lowest rather than to actually harm himself.

"By God's grace he was safe. He cooled down, and rode back home. He has been seeing a psychologist since and is getting better." She told her. She wished things had been different. She loved Fiza, and for years had accepted her as part of their family. "But you don't worry about that now. You have your own family to take care of. Your loyalty after marriage should be to your husband, Fiza."

"I'm not married, aunty." Fiza said, slowly.

Alan's mother looked at Fiza, her mouth open in surprise.

"But Alan said..." she started. "Come with me. Alan is here. You both should talk."

Fiza walked with his mother, her heart pounding at the prospect of meeting Alan again.

Alan's mother led her to a table with a large group of people. She recognized Alan's father. There was an older couple, Alan and Rumya, one of Alan's exes.

Alan's eyes widened at the sight of Fiza. What was she doing here? With his mother?

"Fiza?" Rumya asked, recognizing her instantly. She wondered if Fiza's eyes always looked puffy. She looked a little different. She had a thin scar on her forehead now that was thinly veiled by her hair.

"Hi Rumya," Fiza said, but it was Alan she was looking at.

He closed his eyes for a moment and stood up. Let everything go to hell! His Fiza was here, and if she chose him now, to hell with her husband. He would be the father to her baby. He would love the baby as his own, if Fiza chose to be with him. His hand reached out, almost reflexively, to snap his rubber band at the impulsive thought, but he forced it back down again.

"Want to go for a walk?" Alan asked her.

**********************************************
Author's note

Does marriage trump true love? Or is it the other way around?

Please vote if you like this chapter.
And dont forget to comment so I know what you are thinking.
Thank you for reading until here!

Link to "Bruises" by Lewis Capaldi up top. I think it vibes well with the is chapter. Take a listen if you haven't. It was one of my heart break songs.

❤️Faiza