FIVE; 𝒂𝒘, 𝒊𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒂 𝒕𝒉𝒘𝒆𝒂𝒕!

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"Bobby da Costa came to visit?"

"Omigod, he's totally hot. Like, to a point where it's almost unreal."

"I heard he swings both ways..."

"Well, his sexy body is spoken for."

Peter finally plucked the earphones out and peeked a look toward the group of kids, on the opposite side of the hallway, who was just too rackety this morning. Amidst the eagerly bobbing heads, tardy entrances, and raucous whispers, he finally spotted the far-famed duo of the week. 

Percy da Costa seemed to be in a friendly discussion with his older brother, Roberto, who was dressed to the teeth in a Savile Row suit that looked out of place for a locker-lined hallway of a public school. Percy on the other hand, looked as drool-worthy as ever in his grungy getup, getting the eye from every student in school, either in jealousy or admiration. 

As if having the gift of enchanting, tall, sun-kissed Brazilian genes wasn't enough, the da Costas were all-known millionaires. They directed the DaCosta International branch globally, and even after tying in with Stark Industries, they were a force to be reckoned with. Now being led into the future by the Avengers' very own Roberto da Costa, a.k.a. Sunspot. 

See, Bobby knew Peter—just not Peter Peter. Bobby knew Spider-Man, and Bobby was buddies with Spider-Man. They had flown out on missions together, they had hung out in the Avengers Tower together while Bucky Barnes had tried to master the art of baking cookies instructed by Elle Stark herself, and that time Black Widow kicked Thor's ass at darts. 

"I got the spreadsheet!" A flurried MJ huffed to a stop beside Peter, slumping into the lockers with a soft phew. She waved a stapled pair of papers under his nose. "I had to snatch this baby off of—oy!"

"Gimme that!" Ned gasped, grabbing the paper from her. "I stole it first!"

"Easy, Neddie. What is that?" asked Peter, clicking his locker close. He fled one last glance at Percy and Bobby who were now hunched into one another as if gossiping between themselves. Peter could pick out the faint mumbles of the brothers, discussing something regarding a flare-up in Williamsburg. 

It was hopeless for him to listen further because Peter heard a particular name from his best friends that had him racing back for more. 

"Fairview?" he repeated from what he'd of Ned's ramble. "Fairview what?"

"The mentorship program we signed up for? This year Midtown got Fairview Community," Ned said, skimming through the pages with his index. "And I got... a girl! I got a girl!"

"Girl spelt G-I-R-L? Or Y-O-U-W-I-S-H?" 

"Actually, it's spelt F-U-C-K-Y-O—"

"You know Morgan's a unisex name, right?" MJ cut in to tease, smiling a crooked one.

Ned bitterly slapped the paper into Peter's chest, glaring daggers at MJ. "She ruins the one moment of satisfaction in—oh, wow. Bobby da Costa is here?"

The three of them began to stare stupidly at the brothers. It was impossible not to, especially when they were so hulkingly handsome, completely mythical, and especially since Peter was pretending to be one of those otherworldly beings. For a moment, he wondered about what he had that Percy didn't. 

Number one: that pretentious shit didn't have Clara Rose. Clara Rose and her belly-laughs, and her baggy clothes, and her squeaky shoes. Clara Rose and her little pause at the doorway of her dilapidated building to look at Peter. Clara Rose and her adorable eye-crinkling smile as she lingered inside the threshold to watch him leave. Clara Rose and her tendency to cause most of Peter's gut explosions and slam face-first into an electrical fence.

Number two: that pretentious shit wasn't Spider-Man. Period. It just wasn't doable. 

Ned was the first to break their awe. "Oh, Pete, almost forgot. How did your date go?"

Peter elbowed Ned's side with a hiss. "Not a date!"

"Right, sorry. Study date."

He groaned. "Ned."

"Date," MJ echoed in disbelief. "With the girl thief. Since when?"

"I helped Clara Rose study for a test," Peter explained to her. "That's it. Over. Never going to see her anymore."

And when he said it aloud, Peter felt his nerve endings shrivel off and decay. It was the worst possible scenario, to never get to meet Clara Rose again. It was unthinkable to avoid her. To forget her. 

Ned shook his head. "I highly doubt it. Anyways, who did you get for the mentorship?"

"Hopefully a boy, just because," Peter mumbled, scanning through the mentor column to search for his name. "...And I got a girl." He sighed and tapped on the name adjacent to his. "Sara Bailey."

"At least we know, for sure, that Pete's got a girl," MJ confirmed, laughing.

"Eat shit, MJ," Ned griped. He looked at Peter warily. "Who'd Percy get?"

Peter cocked a suspicious brow. "Percy enrolled? Since when did he care about anything but himself?"

"He wanted the credits for Caltech. They love the helping-hands-bullshit." Ned waved at him to go forth with the name search. "No doubt Bobby pulled some strings. They must've let him get off easy."

"Nope," Peter said, popping his lips on the p. "Percy is right after me. And he got—"

"Let me guess," MJ muttered flatly. "A girl."

Peter rolled his eyes, scanning across the column neighbouring Percy's name, expecting the exact, but nothing good came. His lips fell to an atypical surly line. Time moved too slowly to be normal and he heard the ominous clang of a bell when he read out the name—

"Clara Rose," he breathed out.

And number three on what Peter didn't have: that pretentious shit was Percy da Costa.

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clara rose 🌹

Hi!
Did you see your mentorship allotment yet?

percy

Who'd you get?

clara rose 🌹

I got YOU
I seriously thought I'd be stuck with some snobby jerk.
Can we meet at your place to start this off tonight?

percy

No
I mean my place is too loud
because of the renovation
yeah. we're getting the apartment redone.
we'll just meet at yours?

clara rose 🌹

are you sure you want to come over here?

percy

I don't mind, Clara Rose
kind of busy right now"
I'll see you tonight :)

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"You've got to let me out sometime, you psychos."

Peter was beginning to realize how much of a horrible idea it was to corner golden boy Percy da Costa in the boy's restroom and, if proven uncooperative, abduct him. But, he was reminded of the more significant case at hand and flushed it out of his head. Also, toilet pun.

He mustered the courage to speak up first, only because he was the one who came up with this ridiculous ploy to save his skin. 

"We just want to talk, Percy."

Ignoring the fact that he did sound like a psycho, Percy was way more cavalier about his abduction than Peter expected him to be. He stood with his back against the locked main door—manned by Ned outside—and a lazy leg pitched against it while his fingers played the coin trick that made the penny dance across his knuckles. His tie-dye hair was pulled up to a bun, and Percy had exceptional consent for it. As if having the appeal wasn't enough, he had to have hair more exquisite than the Winter Soldier.

"I don't even know who you are, man. And can we talk someplace else—it reeks like piss took a dump in here," Percy said gruffly, looking around the restroom in disapproval. 

"I have literally been in all of your classes for the past year," Peter pointed out. 

"Congratulations. Who are you?"

"I'm... Peter Parker."

"Oh." His lips pressed together in an indicative line. "Puny Parker. Yeah, I know you." 

"Wow. Okay er, here's—"

"Do you want me to ask someone out for you or something? Is that what this is about? Too much of a pussy, Parker?"

See, now was the time Peter wouldn't mind webbing his stupid face to the toilet. He sucked in a deep lungful, muttered 'for Clara Rose' repetitively under his breath to remind himself, and decided to come out with it. 

"I want to switch students with you," he said in a quick rush of breath.

He risked a slight glance up at Percy who looked utterly puzzled. 

"The mentorship program. Let's switch our allotted mentees," Peter continued, enunciating his syllables carefully. "And we'll both go our own ways like nothing ever happened."

Percy was still confused. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"I just told you, dumbass!" Peter fumed.

He finally came to his senses as he went over Peter's words, his face clearing with realization. Then it hardened with a frown. 

"I'm not switching shit, Parker."

"You don't even care about this program," Peter snapped.

"No, I don't. But, I'm willing to bet that my mentee is either super hot or super gay." He folded his arms across his chest in a show of arrogance. "And either way, I'm not giving up."

Ooh, he wanted to do so, so many evil things to this boy. Would maiming Percy onto a billboard get him arrested? He highly doubted it. If it was one thing Spider-Man was good at, it was throwing kicks and covering his tracks. 

Peter gritted his teeth in exasperation. "Don't make this difficult for yourself, Percy. I just want Clara Rose and we can put this behind us."

"Aw, she's even got a cute name," Percy crooned in a crooked voice. Peter's hackles went ramrod straight. "Now I'm especially looking forward to meeting this Clara Rose."

"Are you serious?"

"Pretty much."

"Absolutely?"

Percy made every word separate as he said, "Suck a dick, Puny Parker."

His lips twitched with an enthusiastic smile. He'd been desperate to turn to this at first. He walked to the door, stretched forward—Percy automatically flinched into himself as if expecting a punch—and knocked on the door. 

"Lock it," Peter called out. 

There was a soft, responsive click behind Percy. He straightened up from his slump and anxiously worked on wiggling on the door handle. His swiftness built when the door didn't budge. 

"What the fuck?" he hissed, still working on fidgeting with the handle. He gave the plywood a strong swat. "Let me out, you psychopaths! You're going to lock us up in this shithole?! Let me out!"

He pathetically tried a few more times. "I swear to God, Parker, I'll—"

When he turned to swing an irate punch at Peter, he was gone. 

And in his place instead, Spider-Man stood firm, a nonchalant arm striking out to capture Percy's flimsy fist. Now, this was a plan Peter was definitely on board with. 

"You think you can make it to Mets with this kind of a swing?" Spider-Man casually waved Percy's fist to show him. "Of course, I don't think they have uniforms for your teeny size."

Percy struggled with his astonishment and the tight grip the superhero had on his hand. 

"Stop playing with me, Parker!" he shouted, searching over Spider-Man's shoulder. "Come on out, you pussy!"

Peter didn't have to aim to plaster a thwip of webbing over Percy's mouth. He's been wishing for this. Percy stumbled back with a grunt and Peter took this instant to patch another one over Percy's hand to the wall. Then another for his other hand. 

"Mmph!" Percy toiled to groan. Sounded like he was trying to curse his way out of this. 

"You just had to do it, DaCosta." Spider-Man walked backwards to stretch his linked fingers forward for a stretch. "Hey, I'm not mad at you. I just hate anyone who just doesn't suffer from preteen acne."

Percy's eyes went wide against all the sticky webbing beneath his nose. His shock was almost too comical now. 

"Pefer?!"

Spider-Man dramatically slumped his head into his arms. "Oh God, you found out." 

"Pefer, oh my gof. You're Spifer-Man?"

"And so soon."

"Pefer, you sonuva—"

"Uh-uh." Spider-Man shot another blast of webbing onto Percy's mouth and made him keel forward with a groan. "You don't get to talk. It's my turn, herpster."

Percy jerked forward with a growl. 

"Ooh, so scary. Was that a thweat?"

∞

percy knows! any guesses on what's next?