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Suman POV

"Suman,"

"Hn?"

I asked, and I felt his other hand caressing my jaw.

"Can I tell you something, and you would not judge me?"

He asked, and I opened my eyes to look at him.

"Never,"

I said, and he sucked on his lips a little, and I said.

"Umm, I know we do have choices, but in life, we have shortcuts for everything,"

His words brought thin lines to my forehead, evidence of confusion.

"What do you mean?"

I asked, and he closed his eyes for a moment, and he shifted a little, pushing me off his chest and said.

"Um, I cannot tell you like that,"

I sat up, hearing him, and I looked at him, turning his face away from me, putting his feet down on the floor, and sitting on the edge of the bed.

"You do not have to tell me about your life. It's not my place to know, and comfort is prime. If something is hurting you, then you do not have to tell it,"

I tried to say, kneeling behind him silently, and he shook his head. His soft curls looked mesmerizingly beautiful this late night, and he said.

"I want to tell you. I mean, you know, you can leave me after it, reject me. There is no foundation. I am sure that man, or any man, would be a thousand times better than me. Also, I will keep an eye on him so he will never hurt you, but you must know that this is your choice. I know you have never been given an option, but I want to provide a choice to you. I want you to decide for yourself. You are not sixteen now. You are way older, way more intelligent and mature than before. You know people now. All of this is... maybe a pull or attraction; I am not sure yet. But I believe that you deserve much more than this. I am not the man you think I am, and I am not. I am not like my brothers, who saved themselves for their wives. I am not an ideal husband. I give priority to the Kingdom before anyone. I can kill without thinking twice, blood does not frighten me, fire does not kill me. I could die for our Kingdom without thinking twice, Suman,"

He said, and I felt a lump in my throat, unable to say anything. My fingers turned slightly colder hearing him, and I did not know what to say.

"I have done things that are unethical,"

He muttered in a slow voice, and I lowered my gaze.

"I have done things a woman would not want in her husband. That's why I am... saying, I am saying that... you can leave, like if you want. I mean, that man is great and... and he will keep you happy,"

His words fumbled, and his voice turned hoarse. I could not stop myself from shifting closer to him and hugging him from behind. My arms wrapped around his shoulder, and I pressed my head against his nape.

"I do not want to marry him. Do not I have any say in who I want to marry or not if I have a choice,"

I managed to say, and he touched my arm silently.

"Suman,"

He breathed and stayed silent for a few moments.

"I was just fifteen,"

His voice broke a little. The shiver in it was visible. I closed my eyes. Nothing could affect me.

"Um, Rudra Bhaisa was twenty-two, and he was practising celibacy at that time, and Ranvijay Bhaisa was the favourite student of our Guruji. He had appointed him as his subordinate to teach other students as well. I was always a gone case. I was intelligent but distracted mostly. Till then, I was living with both of them, but then Rudra Bhaisa came to Suryagarh to work as the personal guard of the former King, who was our uncle, elder brother of our father, and Ranvijay Bhaisa was with Guruji,"

He took a slight pause, and I noticed him scratching his fingers.

"We were out of money our Maasi-maa used to earn for us, and at that time, I had just finished my fencing and war training. Like the basic one, the advance is the actual war experience. Then, I got to work as a soldier in one of the Kingdoms. Since I was just fifteen, I was appointed under the married princess of this Kingdom. She was in her thirties, not very young and not too old, and had two children; I did not know them and never got a chance to. You know, while standing outside her chamber, I got to know about the bedroom activities. But, they were primarily fighting, yelling, and something was happening between them,"

He paused, and I opened my eyes and stayed still, listening to him silently.

"You slept with that married Princess?"

I asked in a slow voice, and he inhaled deeply.

"Well, you made it easy for me,"

He said in a slow voice, and I shifted a little to sit beside him, lowering my legs to the floor and holding his hand.

"Did she force you?"

I tried to ask, and he thinned his brows.

"I was not very mature to know what was forcing. But, she was attractive, she used to call me inside when she was changing, you know like helping her to tie her blouse, and she used to do such things. The Prince was outside for some tour or visit, and they used to live alone in this small state like it was under some bigger Kingdom,"

He muttered, and I nodded.

"Oh, then?"

I asked in a slow voice, and he smiled a little, listening to me.

"Then, one day, she asked me to strip naked for her, like as some prize. I felt bad, but she argued that I had seen most of her, so I should show myself. That day, she laid me under her, and it happened. She rode me. When it happened a few times, I tried to ask why she was doing it. Her husband was good. She said something that I did not know. She said that she also loved her husband, but at a certain age, love fades away, and things come down to needs. The husband wants a wife to run the home, and the wife wants her husband to do the outside work. And she said that her husband is not capable of satisfying her,"

He muttered in a slow voice, and I smiled a little.

"Well, do not worry; I would not want our first time like that, me riding you,"

And, he burst into slow laughter.

"That was not the moral of the story,"

He said, looking at me, and I thinned my brows.

"It was not?"

I asked, and he shook his head.

"No, it was not,"

I smiled, and he held my hand.

"I am afraid I would not make a good husband. The girl I liked called me manwhore, and you deserve better, Suman, seriously,"

He said, and I inhaled deeply, looking at him.

I lowered my gaze to our hands intertwined, and I brought his hand closer to my cheeks. He gulped, looking at me, and I said.

"With my experience, I know what a man's touch is, and I can bet your touch is something that does not exist in any man. You can convince me to marry someone else but I would not afraid of his touch, there is no guarantee of it. Do not worry; I do not want to stay with you if you do not want to,"

I tried to say, and he immediately pulled me closer, shaking his head.

"It's not like that,"

He shifted slightly, pulling his leg up, and I could not help but move into his lap, pressing my legs apart. My breathing raced.

"Then why do you want to push me away?"

I tried to ask, and he said.

"Because you deserve someone better,"

I gulped and cupped his cheek, asking.

"I just want to ask one thing to you,"

He nodded, listening to me, and muttered.

"Anything,"

I leaned in closer and asked in a slow voice.

"Will you leave me for any other woman?"

And, he muttered.

"Over my dead body,"

That was it.

"Then, I choose you for every and in every condition,"

I exclaimed, and he immediately wrapped his arms around me and pushed me down under him on the bed with a quick flip.

My eyes widened with shock, and he brought his lips dangerously closer to mine in a mere moment.

"I have never kissed anyone. Do you want to initiate?"

He asked in a slow voice, and I gulped nervously.

"Me?"

I questioned, and he nodded.

I sucked on my lips and tried to ask.

"Um, I think I have bad breath,"

He shook his head.

"It's okay. I have tasted something used to make a man obsessed with a woman. So, bad breath would not affect it,"

His words flushed my cheek, and I looked into his eyes. I brought my trembling fingers close to his cheek and looked at his lips. They were full, dark pink, and I gently brushed my thumb on them before lifting my face a little and pecking them momentarily.

I immediately looked into his eyes with confusion. Did he like it?

And he smiled a little.

"My turn,"

He muttered and leaned in closer to place his lips over mine. Our noses touched, and I felt his hand wrapping around my waist, getting her to me. I felt his lips parting, and he sucked them into his mouth for once before lifting his face again to look at me.

My mouth ran dry. My heartbeats raced, and my eyes widened with the sensations running into my body. The new itch in my core brought my knees up, and I rolled my cold toes with timidness.

He looked at me silently, and I wondered if he wanted more.

"My turn?"

I managed to ask in a slow voice, and he nodded briefly.

I sucked on my lips, tasting his saliva off and cupped both of his cheeks again, firmer this time. And, pulling myself up, I placed my lips under his.

But before I could do anything, he pressed his lips against mine. My head fell deeper into the mattress as he opened his lips wide and sucked the breath out of me.

My body ached harder, and I felt the wetness of his mouth dirtying me with every moment. He caged me tightly, and when I tried to slip my lips out of his lips' range, he suddenly grabbed my skirt and pulled it over my thighs before slipping both of my legs between me.

A slow and deep moan escaped my lips when my legs parted, adjusting his midriff between me. I turned immobile and breathless.

His lips were sucking my lips, not giving me a single chance to breathe. My eyes had closed shut, and my head rolled back, searching for an escape, but his head was adjusting before I could anticipate.

When my heart tightened with the air shortening, I pushed my feet inside the mattress, lifting my middle body against him in response.

He groaned.

"I want to be inside you right in this moment,"

He breathed in my mouth, and I felt weak all of a sudden.

"Aannhhhhhhhhhh,"

Only a moan could escape in response, and suddenly, he pressed his hardness against me, making me fist my hand on the bed.

"Kunwarsa,"

I moaned in a slow voice. The uneasiness of his length was brutal.

And, suddenly moved off, breaking the kiss and sat up.

"Oh my God!"

He palmed his face, and I could not believe what just had happened.

My breathing was hard; I was panting audibly.

I placed my hand on my chest, calming down my breath and sat up, pushing the skirt down to my feet.

And, he looked at me.

"Are you okay?"

His eyes spoke worry, and I nodded.

"I am sorry, I think I lost... my control,"

I gulped nervously and shook my head timidly.

"You did not,"

I managed to say, and he looked at me silently for a moment and then lowered his gaze for a smile.

"Fuck! this is going intense. You want it too,"

He said, and I shook my head slowly and adjusted my dupatta, trying to hide the smile dying to appear on my cheek.

"Umm, I should probably go,"

I tried to step down from the bed, but he stopped me.

"Suman,"

I gulped silently, turning my gaze to him, and he said.

"Stay, please,"

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