"MOM!"

Sanskar uttered in a broken voice as he took in the sight of the fragile lady who was his mother. Only he knew how much he had longed for her, wanted for her to get up and live again, for her to come back. And today, when she was right in front of him, he felt so happy but seeing her condition now closely, he literally felt like screaming in pain. He had always wanted her to come back, yes... but not this way!

But right now, nothing could make him act sane and he ran towards his mother. She was sitting on the bed, her hairs were disheveled, her expression blank. Sanskar didn't care how he looked at that time -- his face was wet with fresh tears, tears were falling down continuously from his eyes like an endless stream. He didn't remember the last time he cried like this but today it didn't matter. Nothing mattered, except for his mother who had returned to him after fifteen, long years. He didn't care that his juniors and people around were staring at him. He didn't care there were other senior doctors in the room. He didn't care about anything, except for that one woman he would turn this world upside down for only for her to be fine again!

"Mom!" He sobbed and sat besides her, grabbing her by her arms. But she shaked when she heard Sanskar calling her in a loud voice. "Mom... you are here... you are back... you are here with me..." He hugged her tightly as if preventing even the smallest thing from taking her away from him again. He shut his eyes tightly and his tears flowed down his cheeks.

"I still can't believe it. You know how much I have wished for this. How much I have waited for this. How much I prayed for this. Do you know how badly I missed you! You will never leave us alone again, right? You will never leave me again, right-"

He was going to kiss her on her head but suddenly, to his extreme shock, she pushed him away, causing him to stumble in his place.

"What are you doing?!" She screamed on the top of her lungs. "Who are you??!!"

His heart stopped. He looked at her with wide teary eyes and parted lips, unable to understand what just happened. He couldn't even regain his prior stance as he couldn't believe what she just said.

"Mom-"

"Who are you?!" She screamed louder.

His heart physically hurt, he couldn't believe it was his mom saying this. He couldn't believe it was real. Maybe everything was an illusion. Maybe he was dreaming. So his mom was up -- was that a dream too?

No. No, it wasn't.

He could feel it that it was real. His mom, Sujata Maheshwari was up and that too, after long fifteen years of coma.

"What?" His voice came out as a shaky whisper. "What do you mean who I am? I'm Sanskar! Dekhiye mujhe mom! I'm your Sanskar, your son. Your-"

"Who Sanskar? I don't know! Stop it. Go from here!"

"Mom, how can you-"

"I SAID LEAVE! I'm not your mom! I'm not anyone's mom. I'm not anyone's wife also! I-"

He cupped his mom's cheeks and whispered, "What happened to you? Don't you remember me?!"

"No! You all have kept me trapped here in this room. You are not letting me go! Even that..." She said glancing towards Ramprasad who was standing outside near the door, watching his wife and son mournfully. "that man was acting the way you are now. But I... I don't believe any of you. I... I don't know anyone here. I don't want to be here! I want to go from here."

Ramprasad wiped his eyes as his heart threatened to burst at the heartbreaking sight of his wife and son. He closed the door and walked away from there, somewhere far away and to a place where nobody would spot him for he wanted to be alone for some time.

"No, Mom. Please, please don't talk like this. I'm... I'm not letting you go again. Please. I'll... I'll go if you want me to. But you will not go anywhere. Please!" his voice broke as it hurt him too much.

"I don't want anyone here." Her voice became weaker as she breathed unevenly. "I... I don't feel good..."

"Mom! What is happening to you?"

"I-" her vision blurred and darkness engulfed her slowly. Her eyes drooped and rolled upwards before she fainted in her son's arms. Sanskar held her near himself immediately, patting her cheek again and again calling her out incessantly. But all in vain.

Without thinking of anything, he made Sujata lie down on the bed carefully and pulled the blanket on her. Her state right now shocked him beyond extent, she didn't recognise him! How was it possible?! It was like she wasn't even his mother.

"Sanskar," Dr Surinder, who was Rajat's father and Ramprasad's partner cum friend -- who was in the room watching everything helplessly -- called out to him, "It has been like this since she woke up. She doesn't recognise anyone. Not you, not your father or her family. She doesn't recognise herself either."

He told but Sanskar could hardly respond. He looked on at his unconscious mother, unable to understand what was going on. He had always wished for her to get up and live again, he really did. The child in him who was devoid of his mom ever since he remembered always waited for this day to come. But... who knew his mom was going to come back like this! Tears flowed from his eyes and he made no attempt to wipe them. Why should he? Why should a man always act strong? Did they have no right to express their pain? Didn't they feel hurt too?

"Your father was in the same condition as you that day," Surinder continued, very well understanding his condition. "He also couldn't believe your mother was up after fifteen years. Nobody except you thought she would. But she did. I consider this a miracle. And coming to her mental situation right now, I'm thinking she is suffering from amnesia. It's common after coma, but why is she panicking is something we will know only by assessing her. Her body hasn't been active for so many years, that is why she can't move much on her own."

Sanskar turned towards him wiping his tears, "Uncle, where is papa?"

"He was here a few minutes ago. But I think he left."

"I need to see him."

Controlling his heartache for some time, he got up after giving Sujata a tearful glance. He walked out of the room, and Swara watched him from behind. She didn't know what was going on because the door was closed by the time she came there.

Her heart ached when she noticed tears in his eyes as he left the room. But what she didn't understand was why was he crying. But either way, she felt like to go to him and get his pain away from her and take it on herself, for she could see anything but seeing her love break like this.

She was about to follow him, "Sanskar-"

"You little girl!" Annapurna grabbed her arm angrily, shocking her, "Where are you going? Do you not remember what I told you? I said I will expose your intentions to everyone and then you will have nobody else to blame but yourself. You are still not convinced what I can do, right? What will it take for you to leave my son alone?!"

"Ma'am, I respect you. But please don't stop me today. Please," she tried to be as polite and sensitive as she could.

"The nerve of you-"

"Sanskar has done so much for me till today! Turning him a blind eye will be a sin for which I will never be able to forgive myself, ma'am. He is the most special person in my life, what you or anyone else think will not change my feelings for him. You are misunderstanding me. I have no wrong intention, ma'am and I would never do to Sanskar what you think. Please believe me. Right now, he is in a problem and since he is my friend, I will support him whether you like it or not. If he is falling down today, I will be there for him so that I can either help him up, or gladly fall down along with him!"

She felt guilty, but she knew being there for Sanskar right now in his hard time was more important, leaving Annapurna super shocked by her intimidating look. She looked like she wouldn't spare anyone who dared to hurt Sanskar.

Swara didn't know if she did right by doing what she just did, but she knew something was very wrong happening here. She had seen Sanskar weep the way she never thought he would. Means it was something big.

Something that could shatter him.

And she wanted to save him.

But for that, first she needed to know the reason behind his pain! And she knew who could help her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Rajat! Wait." Swara stopped him immediately as she saw him from a distance. Rajat turned around to see her and frowned a little.

"Swara?"

She came to him and seeing her condition right now shocked Rajat.

"I..." she had no words. The pain and panic she was going through was too much to bear. "Please, can you tell me what is going on? What happened to Sanskar? He was crying. Is he okay? Is he-"

"Swara... Swara, relax." Rajat calmed her down. "First you calm down. Have you seen yourself? You look so pale-"

"I don't care." she said trying to get her breathing normal. "Please Rajat, please tell me. Why is Sanskar-"

"Don't worry, everything is-"

"Stop it!" She bursted at him much to his shock. "Stop telling me everything is okay because I sure as hell know nothing is!"

She closed her eyes and breathed unevenly, the events of what traumatized her flashing before her eyes as she couldn't take it anymore. Rajat didn't understand how to calm her down. He could see her breaking. Heck, he was watching his both friends breaking, yet he couldn't do anything about it. And he felt so helpless.

"You care so much about him Swara," he couldn't help but blurt out. "Yet I don't understand what is it that happened that you allowed this distance to come between both of you."

"I'm sorry!" She croaked with quivering lips, "It's the worst thing I've ever done in my life. Sanskar... he has always been there for me. I never wanted to hurt him, but I had no choice. Whatever reason I had, it was no excuse."

"You both are hurt, Swara." He stated, "It has never been only about Sanskar or you alone. It has always been about both of you."

"Please Rajat, tell me what happened to Sanskar. And there was someone in the room, maybe a woman. Was it..." She just left it off unsurely.

"Mother! Yes, his mother."

Her eyes widened and lips parted in shock at the blunt revelation. She knew for a fact that Sanskar didn't have his mother with him, but she had seen him talk a lot about her. About how she used to love him the most in his family, how she took care of each and every little thing regarding him, how she used to love him and treasure him -- in his words, she was an ideal and the best mother. But what he never said was what happened that he parted from her and lost her, neither she had the courage to ask him as she knew it would hurt him.

"But... how?" she was lost for words. She looked at Rajat with eyes filled with lots of questions. Rajat took in a deep breath.

"Tum nahi jaanti Swara, ki kismat ne Sanskar ke saath kitna ghatiya mazaak kiya hai," he stated. "I've heard about children losing their mothers to death at a young age but never heard about a child losing his mother even when she is alive."

"What?"

"Sujata aunty, I mean Sanskar's mother, had met with a fatal car accident. He was just ten years old at that time. He shared a very deep bond with his mother, I mean, which child doesn't, right? But you know, no one in Maheshwari family has ever loved and pampered Sanskar like his mother did. Not even his father, as he used to be busy with his hospital and all that thing. And about others in his family... well, Durgaprasad uncle and Laksh do care about him but Annapurna aunty never did. Back then, she used to be kind of insecure about him because he was... let's just say he was better than her son Laksh in many ways. While Sanskar was a shy and obedient kid who used to excel in his school, Laksh was like a spoilt brat who never liked to study and was always up for mischief. You can't blame either of them, they both were kids. But Annapurna aunty didn't take it lightly. Even Sujata aunty used to be better than her. She used to be competitive against her and Sanskar and once she even tried to fuel Laksh's mind against them, however the love he has for his brother never let him come in his mother's words."

Rajat folded his arms across his chest and looked down, but Swara still stood, not moving at all in her place. All the things he just told her made her realise that Sanskar didn't actually have the best family life even after being a part of a joined-family.

"When Sujata aunty met with the accident, she was brought in this hospital. The same hospital that was once her dream. The dream she and Ram uncle saw together. Uncle, being a Neurologist, tried very hard to save her. But her brain had a deep injury. He asked a friend of his for help who was a skilled neurosurgeon but he also didn't have hope and asked everyone to be prepared for the worst. When her surgery was done, she was declared to be out of danger. But to everyone's shock, she didn't wake up even after seventy-two hours passed by, which you know is not right. After checkup, it was found that she had gone into coma. Everyone waited for days, months, years even... to see aunty wake up. But she didn't. She could never even respond to any external stimulus. After about one year his friend again came to check her and he finally declared that whatever they were doing was no use anymore and there were no hopes of bringing her back. It was a severe brain injury and there were so many complications. He said she would remain in this state for all her life."

Swara covered her mouth in shock, not being able to believe that something so big could have happened in his family.

"Oh my god. And what about Sanskar?"

Rajat sighed, "Sanskar didn't know anything that happened."

"How?!"

"Aunty was in coma, in such a state that there were no hopes of her returning. All the elders in the family were aware of it except for Sanskar because nobody let him know that. They just said that... his mother will never come back to him."

A tear rolled down from her eyes as she couldn't imagine what all things he might have gone through. He had been living his life without a mother when he needed her and loved her the most -- that would have been so painful. To think he was already so much in pain, before she added more fuel to the fire. She sniffed closing her eyes tightly, feeling nothing but sad for him and hate for herself.

"I think, this explains why Sanskar and Ram uncle never really had a good father-son relationship with each other. It's because Sanskar despises his father for keeping his mother's truth out of his knowledge."

"Then how did Sanskar come to know the truth?"

"One day, when he saw his father going to the room to visit aunty. I think he was around... seventeen. That's when he saw his mother on the bed. Alive but at the same time not living. It was as if she was a non-living object. I don't know much that happened that day because Sanskar never told me nor I asked him myself, it would have been insensitive of me. But all I know is, since that day, his relationship with his family, especially Ram uncle got rougher than it already was."

"But why would Dr Maheshwari and others keep the truth from him?"

"Even I'm not that sure about it. I think it's because Sanskar was too young to know the disturbing truth about his mother. Maybe they thought... telling him his mom was gone would be better than telling him your mom is alive but she is in coma and will never get up. Even the chances of her getting up was almost negligible. Everyone gave up hope, Swara. But it's only Sanskar who hoped that one day his mom will get up. If there is one thing Sanskar has always asked from God, it is to bring his mom back to him."

Swara wiped her tears but still the new ones kept flowing.

"But whatever uncle thought, it broke Sanskar that his own family hid such a big thing about his mother from him. And now... Just think. Fifteen years, Swara. After fifteen years he has seen his mother alive, yet not living. She has returned but not as the woman Sanskar and we all have always known. She has lost her memory. She doesn't remember her own son or her own husband or family. So painful and traumatic it is, I can't even imagine my mother going through any of this." Rajat trembled a bit when he recalled how vulnerable Sanskar had always been about his mother. What would be his condition right now?

"You know, for everyone he is so happy-go-lucky type, the one who believes in making our own choices more than fate, someone with hardly any flaws, but deep inside, he is a very sensitive person who has always yearned for his mother ever since he remembered. He, too, is broken. He doesn't show it, just like you don't show your pain. In that case, there's no difference between you and Sanskar. You both are so good at hiding your pain, and are so broken from inside."

He said looking straight into her eye and she couldn't help but accept the fact that he was doing what she had always done -- hide her pain from the world. Along with that also came the realisation that he had helped bring her mother back to her when she was almost on the verge of dying. At that time, he just helped her happily and selflessly without showing the loss of his own mother. Her pain of losing her mother was temporary, till her operation was successful. But now it broke her heart that the pain of losing his mom had always been there within him. When her mom fought between life and death, her world crumbled. Then how would Sanskar be feeling like?

"Swara, you know this is the first time we both are actually talking to each other. Please, take me as a friend who wants only good for his friends and listen to me. Don't listen to anyone what they say. It doesn't matter who it is. It's their misfortune that they are going against the one who plans everything from above and are breaking apart two true lovers. We all have seen it. Whenever Anushka and I look at you and Sanskar we feel like you both are soulmates. It's like you two are made for each other. Please, don't let anything come in between your and Sanskar's love. I know your love is stronger than how we all think it to be."

"So what do you think Rajat, what should I do now?" She asked him just in the way like Rajat said to her... he was her friend who only wished good for his friends.

Rajat smiled, "Someone, very dear to me has recently said that if we love someone, it's better to let him go. If he finds his way back to you, it's yours. And if he doesn't come, then it's not meant to be yours."

Swara shaked her head, "Do you think Sanskar will come to me?"

"I know Sanskar will come to you, Swara." He corrected her words. "I have never been so sure about anything else than I am about this."

"Even after I hurt him so much? He doesn't hate me? He has every right to." She uttered in a broken voice.

"You need to explain him your side, Swara. Why you did what you did. And no matter what he will never hate you, Swara. I can promise you that."

She sighed sadly, thinking about what he just told her. Nonetheless, she looked at Rajat with hope filling her insides.

"Thank you Rajat, for telling me everything. And I'm sorry for earlier."

"You're welcome. And it's okay, I understand," Rajat smiled but Swara could hardly return that smile, remembering the way Sanskar was crying some times back because of what happened. Her mind was filled by many thoughts.

Right now, more than confessing to him that she loved him, she needed to be there for him in his tough time!

~*~*~*~*~*~*

Sanskar walked with quick strides to see the only person his heart so badly wanted to -- his father. His feet stopped when he finally caught sight of him sitting on the chair, lost in his thoughts, looking at the ground.

This was how his father was. Always hiding his pain, always putting a fake smile on to hide his pain. That's why no one, not even he could see his pain. And he admitted that he too did the same thing -- hide his pain. That's why neither of them could see each other's pain.

Sanskar stood in front of his father and dropped down on his knees, unable to stay strong anymore. All he knew was that he had been in pain for too long. He wasn't so strong. He wished for this pain to stop.

"Papa..." He uttered staring at Ram.

That was all it took for Ram to vent his pain out. A lone tear escaped his eye and he couldn't bring himself to face Sanskar. He didn't understand how to save his family from breaking like this.

As Ram let his guards down, Sanskar also couldn't resist his pain. Seeing that, Ram pulled his son into a bear hug and without a moment's hesitation Sanskar returned the hug. They didn't remember the last time they had a conversation or even a moment like this. In all these years Ram had unintentionally ignored his own son way too much. He couldn't understand how to make up for it. He felt totally defeated as a husband and as a father. He couldn't do anything.

"I'm sorry, Sanskar." Ram sobbed as he buried his face on Sanskar's shoulder. "I can't save our family. I'm sorry, because when you needed me, I was never there for you. When you were in pain, when you cried every night for your mother, when you yearned for parents' love, when you managed everything as a child alone without complaining, I was never there for you, beta. I'm sorry for everything."

Sanskar didn't understand how should he react. He felt even more emotional. It was the first time his father admitted that he neglected him. It's like, all the harsh feelings he had towards his father was going away with every word he said. Right now, nothing else mattered. All that mattered to them was their family and the woman they loved. Their loss was one, their pain was one, their feelings were one. They realized they needed to be with each other in this tough time.

"It's okay," he closed his eyes, "I'm sorry too. I was also never there. When I used to think you had no time for me but in reality you were just as much in pain as I was. I couldn't see your pain. I'm sorry for never understanding you."

"I should be sorry, beta. It's me who never understood you. The truth is I just couldn't understand what to do. How to handle all this. I made myself busy in my work, I thought this will distract me from the pain of losing your mom. But... I could never see what it would have been like for you."

The sight of father-son duo hugging each other to share their pain made Swara stand emotional in her own spot. She was seeing everything from a distance, she knew how they used to have differences between them, and avoided talking with each other. And today, they were here, crying together for the one who mattered to them more than anything, understanding each other's pain and sharing their sorrows.

Sanskar broke the hug but still held him by his arms, "Papa... What has happened to mom? What is she saying? She doesn't remember us. She doesn't even remember herself."

"Things are very complicated, Sanskar. After fifteen years, your mom has woke up. That itself is a miracle. She wouldn't have even woke up at all if not for our prayers to God." He sighed mournfully, "She woke up from coma when you were not here, it's been two days. Just like your state right now, we were also very shocked to see Sujata like this. I also can't believe that she... she doesn't remember us. I talked with my friend who is specialized in neurology and he said that the car accident she had all those years ago had caused a deep injury in her head which caused her to go into coma in the first place. We were told she will never wake up. But... It's a miracle. She got up. She is alive, safe and sound. Only... she has developed some cognitive disabilities. Because of that, she has developed amnesia. Fifteen years in coma, what else can one expect. That is why she doesn't remember any of us. Forget us, she doesn't even know who she is. She doesn't remember any detail of her life. It's as if her brain has been erased."

"If God had to return her to us, why did he give her to us in this state?"

"Maybe he wasn't done testing us yet."

"And what about mom? How would she be feeling? She doesn't remember anything, whether it is about herself, or her family, and us. I can't see her like this, Papa. There must be some way. There must be something we can do."

"We can't do anything except wait."

'Wait'. All these years, all they had been doing was wait. And still, there was nothing that could bring his mom back.

"For how long?" he closed his eyes and bowed his head, "Weren't fifteen years enough already?"

Ram whimpered, "I don't know, beta. I feel lost. I don't know what to do anymore. You know, ever since she has got up, she has been saying that we have kept her here and trapped her. Maybe it's because of the trauma she suffered."

Sanskar sighed shaking his head, not trying to remember the day when he lost his mom. The day when she had the accident! She was driving back home and she didn't understand when the brakes of the car had failed, causing her to lose control of her car. The speed was also too much and when the car hit a boulder beneath it, it caused the car to flip over, upside down. And as if that damage wasn't enough, after the flip it landed in a loud thud against the ground below a cliff, causing serious car damage and even more than the car Sujata's whole condition was damaged. Her head got severely injured due to the sudden flip of the car. The last thing she remembered before slipping into unconsciousness was if something happened to her, who would look after her family -- her ten year old son and her husband?

Ram sniffed and wiped his tears, "Sanskar, I need to go to perform a surgery. It's important and I have to go now. Take care of yourself, okay?"

And once again, his father was being strong to carry out his duty. So, he nodded his head reluctantly. "All the best. Take care."

Ram got up and along with him, Sanskar got back on his feet. His father left from there, and when he left, Sanskar just let himself drown in his own misery. It pained him so much to see his mom not remembering herself or him, but it pained him more to see her condition. Why did she have to be in this condition in the first place? What wrong had she done to deserve this? She was the lady who loved everyone, cared for everyone. Because of her selflessness and her being a social activist she was admired and respected very much in the society as well as family -- then what went wrong?

As he tried to get a grip on himself, trying not to fall weak if he had to fix things, he felt a hand on his shoulder from behind. When he felt the familiar warmth, he immediately wiped away the remaining hint of tears, turned around only to find Swara standing in front of him, giving him a look.

"Sanskar."

"Swara?" He couldn't help but whisper in shock as he didn't expect her to come.

At that time, she didn't care about anything that could hold her back from comforting him. She didn't care that Annapurna refrained her from even coming near to Sanskar. She didn't care about her warning too. All she knew was her love was breaking and she wanted to be there with him not just because she owed it to him, but also because she wanted to.

Sanskar didn't know what came over him, the next moment he just wrapped his arms around Swara, burying his face in her shoulder, leaving her baffled by the sudden response but knowing this was what he needed to do -- to share his pain with someone. But she composed herself immediately when she heard him speak up to her for the first time in these three days.

"I don't know what is going on, Swara. First, I lost her fifteen years back due to an accident. And now when she has woken up, she doesn't remember anything. All I wish is for my mom to get well like she was before. All I wish is for this pain to end. I'm tired. I can't do this anymore. I just can't act strong anymore. I always have, you know... I always hoped and prayed that mom will come back. But she came back like this..." He closed his eyes, "Why is this happening? Why is it that everyone I love come to leave me sooner or later? First mom, then y-"

He caught himself immediately before he could complete the last word. Swara tried very hard not to let herself break by seeing his pain as she wanted to be strong enough to catch him if he fell.

"Sanskar, I know. It's okay. It will be okay, I promise." She said in a broken voice, patting his back in assurance to make him feel better.

Realising what he just did by acting upon his heart, he broke the hug, ripping himself apart from her leaving Swara shocked and hurt. He was supposed to stay away from her!

"Sanskar!" She tried to reach out to him but he turned around, his back faced her.

"Please leave me alone." came the cold, indifferent reply from him.

"But-"

"Please Swara, leave me alone! I don't want to talk with anyone."

"Please Sanskar. Just for once, look at me. Please." She pleaded.

"No."

"Why?"

"Are you really asking me 'why?'" he turned around to face her, not being able to take it anymore. "Tum hi ne toh kaha tha na mujhse, ki hum dono sirf colleagues hai?! Then why are you here?"

"I wanted to talk with you." She said softly, hurt seeping into her voice by seeing his pain.

"But I don't want to. Please Swara, just go before I say something to you that I don't want to."

"Sanskar, are you-"

"NO! No Swara, I'm not okay and I'll never be! So don't even ask. It's my problem, not yours." He said the same thing she'd told him back then, his voice louder than intended.

"Sanskar... I-" her voice came in inaudible sniffs not because of her own pain, but seeing his pain.

"You said that I pity you. Yeah." He said ignoring the pain that flashed across her eyes. "You know what, I never asked anything from you. I helped you and was there for you but not even for once I ever asked anything in return from you. I never told you that I love you. I never even told you that I want you in my life. It's because I didn't want to force you. I didn't want you to feel pressurised or something like that by me. But you know, it pains when the finger is raised on your love. Each and every word you said that day, it broke me, Swara," he said while recalling what happened between them that day, "And you know what! You were wrong about every damn thing that day Swara. Every. Damn. Thing." He stepped near towards her in anger and helplessness, making fists trying hard to calm down as his heart threatened to burst.

"When I said I want to stand by your side, I didn't mean that I think you were weak. I said with the intention that I believe you can fight your own battles and I will just be there. Just. Be. There. For you, and with you! You took everything in a wrong way! All I was trying to tell you that day was... that I love you." His tone dropped down when he uttered the last three words. He grabbed her shoulders closer to himself. Swara looked at him and it stabbed her heart when he looked at her with the most pained expression flashed across his features. What had she done to him!

"I love you not because I feel bad you went through all that, but because of who you are! I love the girl standing here in front of me today, because of how strong and amazing you are. I love you, not pity, damnit!"

"Sanskar, I was wrong-"

He chuckled humorlessly, "You have said whatever you had to say that day only, Swara. Honestly, there is nothing left for me to say. Nothing left for me to explain myself. It shows how much I failed in gaining your trust. How much I failed in making you realise our love for each other."

"No, Sanskar, no, you didn't fail-"

"You never trusted me enough."

"No Sanskar, that's not-"

"But it's not your fault. It's mine. It's me who could never gain that damn trust."

"No, you did-"

"Stop, Swara!" His voice dropped an octave making her sob internally, "Just stop. If you don't want to be with me, I'm fine with it. But please, don't you ever dare say again that I don't love you and just pity you."

"I know you never pitied me, Sanskar! You loved me. And I..."

"You what, Swara?"

"I... just want to be there for you." She rephrased her words, instantly regretting it. Why couldn't she confess to him that she loved him?! Hadn't she decided already that she was going to fix things between them? Or maybe she was still worried about how Annapurna would react and the further consequences.

"Why?" He asked, his voice icy.

"Because it's what I know I should do. Sanskar, you were there with me in my worst times, when my mom's life was in danger. You were there with me. And now, I want to be there for you. And with you." She admitted, hoping he would see what she meant.

"Oh! So it's like... you want to return the favour?" He raised an eyebrow, as if challenging her. "No, thanks. I will handle it."

"No, Sanskar! It's not the favour but it-"

He sighed and turned his gaze away from her, "I think you should go now, Swara. It's your time of duty."

"I care about you, Sanskar!" She cried out before bursting into tears, "I really care about you. It hurts me to see you in pain."

Swallowing the pain her broken voice was causing him, he stepped a bit away from her and stood at her right, trying not to appear vulnerable in front of her. Maybe she was finally admitting what she truly felt for him.

"I'll be fine. Just let me be." He still said unemotionally, yet Swara could feel a thousand emotions of his in those words.

She opened her mouth to say something, anything, that could make him feel better. But she didn't get a chance to because Sanskar walked past her and then away from her, their backs facing each other. But something came in his mind, and he stopped in his place and turned towards her.

"Swara? One last thing, before we go our separate ways."

She waited for him to speak with a bated breath. The words 'separate ways' crushed her from inside but she stood her ground as he continued.

"Humare rishtey ka faisla ab tumhe karna hai Swara." He said huskily. "You have to decide what you want from me. It will be solely your decision. And from here on, whatever relation we will keep with each other, it depends on that. And yes, this time please decide with your heart, not out of any of your insecurities or by what anyone else says about us or by whatever reason you have."

And the words hit the right nerve of Swara. She knew what to do now. If it was a decision, if it was a choice to choose between something that would cause them pain; and their love, their future together, then she had already made one. She had chosen her future. She wanted Sanskar. She wanted her future with him, or by his words should she say... their future together!

But she admitted to herself, she had to put in lot of efforts to make Sanskar believe it! Not that he wouldn't believe her but this time she wanted to act and not just use words. As they say 'actions speak louder than words'. And for that, she would go to any extent to win her love back.

When Sanskar turned to leave, Swara, giving no thought of anything except their present, came to him and hugged him from behind. This affectionate gesture of Swara strengthened Sanskar's belief of her love for him. Her warmth against his skin caused his eyes to close on their own accord.

"Sab thikh ho jayega, Sanskar. Please shant hojao." She uttered softly to him, "I can't see you in this much pain. I know you are hurting, Sanskar. Tum chahe toh... toh mujh par chillao, ya fir zor se ro kar apne dard ko bahar nikalo. Par please, mujhse nazre mat churao. Mujhse baat karna band mat karo. Mujhse apna dard mat chhupao. I know I did wrong with you. I wish... I so damn wish I could take back each and every word that I said that day."

The words threatened to burst his throbbing heart from within and he finally acted upon his pain. He closed his eyes and leaned his head a bit back, as if hearing her assuring words.

"Mai hoon tumhare saath, Sanskar. Har wakt, har pal. Please stay strong. You cannot break like this. You have to stay strong to set the things right. And I'm always there with you even when you don't ask."

She broke the hug and kept wiping the flowing tears, but in vain. She did notice Sanskar frozen in place, he might have not expected her to do what she did right now.

But she wanted him to know she was always going to be there for him. And she wanted to repair every damage she did to their relationship.

All of a sudden, Sanskar remembered he had given her a choice to make and that now their relationship would depend only upon her choice.

He excused himself, wiping the corner of his eye for once. He finally walked away from there, leaving Swara stand there to see him going.

A part of his heart felt content that after many days, he truly felt like he saw love and longing in her eyes, the love that was only for him. There was no more doubt now -- she loved him. He felt bad for pushing her away like this but he knew this was the only way to get her to confess her love for him. He wanted to know what was it that caused her to separate both of them like this! Pushing her away like this was tough for him, and them, but he had to stay strong. If he wanted both the women who he loved more than life back in his life, he had to be strong.

On the other hand, Swara looked on as her eyes stayed fixed on his retreating figure. Tears flowed down her eyes and she sobbed seeing him leaving, going farther from her. She broke down and slid down to the ground, leaned on one of the chairs that were in a line that was nearby and taking it's support. She lifted her head and watched him leaving, going away from her vision.

"I love you Sanskar..." She admitted in a very slow and broken voice looking at him. "I love you so much. I can't see you like this. I wish I could do something. I wish..."

She sniffed and wiped her eyes but still the tears flowed. But this time, her tears didn't make her appear weak. On the contrary, she appeared strong as she was determined.

"You have given me a choice, Sanskar. And I have made it."

She would do anything to fix what she had broke. And now she was determined, it was time for her to win Sanskar back! And this time, nothing was going to hold her back.

She was not going to let their love fail because of anything!

And she had already decided how to start with it. And she was adamant on that.

What would be better than helping a person out who was dearer to Sanskar than any other person in his life?

~*~*~*~*~*~*

Precap : Swara tries to help Sujata, and Sanskar sees it

So, what do you think will happen next?
Will Swara succeed in winning Sanskar back? And what do you think about Sanskar?

And how was the chapter? It was more like an insight into Sanskar's life. Till now we knew about Swara and her life struggles, and today we got to know more about Sanskar 😊