Currently, Namjoon had drowned himself into a conundrum. One which left him wondering inexorably about how a gust of zephyr— that was conventionally supposed to relieve him of his worries— ended up impaling him at millions of spots. With his figure already inclined towards being slightly-hunched, the unannounced ambush by that wretched string of chilly wind only contributed to further gnarl him out of shape. Namjoon rubbed his palms against his fabric-clad arms, mentally cursing at his own self for forgetting to don a pair of gloves before he embarked for Youngmi's place.

Namjoon would not be lying if he admitted to watching the glass doors that led into Youngmi's clinic being sealed shut— not budging a tad even when he repeatedly exerted all his force onto them— resulting to be fairly sufficient for anchoring him down to the most atrocious throes that he had ever experienced.

Why of course, he had a penchant for being dramatic.

However, truth be told, those very doors had often proved to be illustrious— especially during the times of urgency— whenever it came down to the need of just flinging them right open. They would get stuck, squeaking in redundancy while the human on the other end resorted to every method that he could avail so that they made way for him.

It amused Namjoon how despite squandering a considerable amount of money in order to get them upgraded so that the lock-and-key system could be done away with, Youngmi was still unable to fix the problem.

"She could've just replaced those freaking panels, that would've saved much of her money. She reeks of rich these days, has no idea anymore how to spend wisely." Namjoon clicked his tongue, simultaneously mulling over what could have spurred his senior into closing the business comparatively earlier today.

"What must she be so busy wit—" He started, but discontinued his rant soon after a pair of footsteps— evidently incongruous to his— captured his attention. Namjoon was quick to pivot himself around and take a glimpse of his potential assaulter, which just could not have failed worse and embarrassed him further, because no visual traces whatsoever were located by him even after a handful of seconds had passed.

Namjoon gulped anxiously, meandering his vision a couple of times prior to finally resuming on his track again.

"Not gonna lie, that was scary..." He mumbled, bringing his palm to rest on his chest— obviously to check whether or not his heartbeat had recovered from the process of plunging down to the depths.

Although it must sound disappointing at the moment, but a few advances towards Youngmi's house were all that took to actuate Namjoon into a frenetic mess for one more time. A shrill clang, though originating at a safe distance from him, was enough for his forehead to visibly perspire. The gradual unfolding of that inordinately terrifying circumstance was not providing much reassurance either, in order to get past which, Namjoon quite irresolutely decided to proceed towards the source of that very sound.

He craned his neck into the alleyway, scrunching up his nose in hesitation while registering the amount of bleakness that the lane was emitting. The space between Namjoon's brows got occupied by apprehension, the emotion almost ready to spill itself out of him. Warily, he headed in the direction of a pair of trashcans, his footsteps with an impact as light as that of a feather. He extended one of his arms, but wound up switching it up with his leg in the heat of the moment, ultimately kicking the litter with his mammoth strength.

With the dustbins tumbling down one after the other, also emerged a disgruntled feline hiss. The concerned cat then spared a menacing glance at Namjoon before setting off to disappear into the murk of night.

Namjoon heaved frustratingly, "What on the earth? Since when has senior's neigborhood begun to feel this creepy? If only she was at her clinic, I wouldn't have to walk all the way till here."

Namjoon swayed his head, his visage laden with displeasure. However, it was as if a realization flashed across his mind that he shot his head up, his eyes flying open to complement the reaction as he uttered, "Is she perhaps sick? What if she didn't come to her clinic at all and I'm overthinking in vain that she dumped me by closing early today, like how she has always done it? I need to hurry."

The man picked up his pace, a smile of gratification flitting across his lips now that he could spot the independent house that belonged to the woman who helped him dream of the unrealistic.

Almost to the likes of harvesting the stars one day and model a crown out of them for her.

Cliché, but that was the kind Namjoon was.

The typical, hopeless romantic kind.

Namjoon converted his ambling into jogging, eventually arriving at the threshold in no time. However, once he reached for the doorbell, he noticed how the structure had opted to mingle with darkness, similar to numerous others that he had come across in the meantime. Nonetheless, he pressed the button, prompting a certain kind of wonted melody to waft through the interior almost immediately.

"Is she not home?" Namjoon muttered. "Did she forget about our date?" His expressions drooped.

Namjoon staggered, landing onto the steps with a dramatic thud. Bringing his palms closer to his face, he soon slipped into the state of oblivion, shielding himself from the harsh truth that relentlessly kept on confronting him. No matter how much he endeavored to slink past it, life would, at the end of the day, throw a curveball and obligate him into facing it for good.

Namjoon had become desperate for a closure at this stage, at the same time still obdurate in his head as ever— regarding averting any type of conversation that would include him addressing the hurt that had persisted for as long as he could remember.

Youngmi did not deserve an uncalled-for emotional baggage to be unloaded in front of her.

The male had not yet departed from his melancholic recollections that a harmonious giggle dropped in his ears. He whisked his head up instantly, hoping to see the pretty face that he was supposed to take out for today. He shifted around for a while to catch a clearer view before altogether standing up on his feet in defeat, only to have the ground beneath him crumbling and swallowing him in.

Youngmi was with Ewan, the very man who had turned everything upside-down ever since his arrival. Not to say that Namjoon was winning at his life until then, but he still had the security of Youngmi not being interested in any male in this world, let alone his own self.

"That fucker..." Namjoon gritted his teeth, clenching his jaw and fists at once and charged towards the duo.

A split-second long eye-contact with Namjoon was established by Youngmi, succeeding which a whole gush of guilt drenched her entire physique.

How could she forget?

"Oh my God, Namjoon," Youngmi initiated, the hitch in her voice sounding more prominent than she must have envisaged, "I'm so sorry, I completely lost track of time— I didn't mean to, really. I won't even make excuses, they can't suffice for what I've done to you yet again—"

"I'm sorry, what's happening here?" Ewan snickered, rallying glances between Namjoon and Youngmi.

Youngmi's eyes widened, dreading the consequences of Ewan intervening in between when Namjoon already disliked him so badly, while the latter reverted back to just standing planted at his own spot, feigning nonchalance like he usually did.

Why was he still expecting from Youngmi, for her to pay attention to him? That was undoubtedly out of question now. Her gazes were never meant for him, and now with Ewan's entry into their lives, the prospect of achieving it someday— in the near future— had diminished too.

"You." Namjoon smiled pretentiously, efficiently dispelling the unnerving silence that was building around them. "You is what happened. And I don't like it, but I also can't do much about it. Guess I'll have to learn how to live with it then, isn't it so? I hope you had a good day— Er, date with senior today? I'll be off, then, not that my presence pleases anyone here anymore."

And Namjoon walked away, following the epitome of solitude— the Moon himself.

▪️

a/n

it's confirmed, i can't write unless i'm at home and it's my 5 year old computer that i'm typing the new chapter with 😭 i've got a week long break, ig the update speaks enough for that? haha. i really enjoyed writing this chapter, hopefully i'll be able to make time for future updates once i return to campus.
pls vote and comment if you liked the chapter? i hope the book's still fresh in y'alls minds? hehe