Y'all we had our first football game last night and it was eventful.

- We lost 28 to 64

- I actually did pregame right

- I didn't die of heatstroke in my uniform
(surprisingly)

- I didn't go too far for the half time show, and did all the moves right

- The pep band was great

AND NOW FOR THE BIGASS GOSSIP
There is this girl (she's a senior) and she went to the football game. Which would have been completely normal, except she was VERY pregnant. Like this bitch was about to eXPLODE. So, me and my friends had always made jokes that her water was gonna break at home coming but guess what? HER WATER BROKE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE THIRD QUARTER. (If you don't understand football, it's split up into 4, fifteen minute quarters and that's how they give people a break)

Like, the person sitting next to me just leaned over and said (I'm gonna call the pregnant one Susan because I need to tell you her last name for a joke) "You know Susan Shook? (Yeah, that's her last name) The pregnant one? Her water just broke."

AND LET ME SAY I WAS SUSAN SHOOK.

I WAS SHOOK, BUT DAMN, NO ONE COULD HAVE BEEN AS SHOOK AS SUSAN LIKE
- HER LAST NAME IS SHOOK
- SHE WAS PROBABLY SHOOK WHEN SHE FOUND OUT SHE WAS PREGNANT
- SHE WAS PROBABLY SHOOK² WHEN HER WATER BROKE AT A FUCKING FOOTBALL GAME
- SHE WAS (IS) SHOOK WHEN SHE GAVE BIRTH
- HER BABY IS PROBABLY SHOOK
- THE FATHER WAS SHOOK

E
V
E
R
Y
O
N
E

W
A
S

S
H
O
O
K

That was way longer than I intended, Sorry