After several hours of walking, I was done. I needed rest. Despite how energetic I'd been when I woke, just that short period of walking quickly sapped my strength. I had no reserves at all. None. My head was pounding again, ice picks digging at my brain. It hurt to keep my eyes open and I found myself squinting. Looking around, I saw some large logs of driftwood washed up on the beach further ahead.

"Let's take a break for some sleep up there, okay? I need a rest," I said as I pointed at the logs.

"That's fine. I'll keep watch while you sleep. You are carrying two, after all." Elatha smiled as he looked down at my belly admiringly.

It was odd it didn't bother him in the slightest that I was huge with another male's child. In fact, he found it arousing. I shook my head, wincing at the sharp spike of pain at my inadvertent action. It had to be the difference in culture.

But was it specific to Fomorians? Or was my lack of understanding due to me thinking like a human and not an immortal? That needed to change. It could put me or my child in danger. I had to adapt to immortal life more quickly, to understand how they... we... thought. Starting with thinking of myself as an immortal, I chastened myself.

As a member of the Asgardian royal family, I had to do better. I needed to adapt faster and be more accepting of other immortal cultures. Accidentally teaching my child poor attitudes or inadvertently causing a war or offense that could cost lives was not how I wanted to start my immortal life. Continuing in ignorance wasn't okay.

Yet, I didn't know how to shed mortal thoughts and values that I'd spent thirty-five years learning. Sure, that was a blink of an eye to an immortal, but I didn't have the benefit of those long years of experience. Instead, I was an adult in the immortal world that normally didn't reach maturity until they were closer to one hundred years old. But I didn't have sixty-five years to catch up.

There is no choice. I have to do better. I have to. My child deserves my best. I can't fail at this.

Although I was sure it would most likely blow up in my face, still, I needed to try to understand. Hesitantly, I took the leap and asked, "Why do you find my pregnancy arousing when it isn't your child?" 

Maybe by being blunt, I could avoid any flirtatious aspects that might bite me on the ass.

Great. Even my brain is constantly throwing innuendos at me.

Elatha looked surprised. "Why wouldn't I? Immortals don't reproduce very often. Every pregnancy is celebrated, as it is a rare event. A female might go hundreds or even thousands of years before becoming pregnant or between children."

His response stunned me while I considered the ramifications. Those kinds of time scales were hard for me to put into perspective. How could I wrap my mind around a concept that I had no real frame of reference for? But once I considered it, the logic made sense given the sizes of immortal populations. Of course they have a low fertility rate. 

We'd reached the logs, and I lowered myself to the sand with a grateful sigh. "Okay, I can understand why pregnancy would be celebrated, but why does it turn you on?"

Elatha smiled. "It's not pregnancy itself that turns me on, dear Shannon. It's you being pregnant that turns me on."

"Why? The child isn't yours. It's proof that I've had sex with another. For humans, that is a distinct turn-off. Human males typically don't want a woman who has been with someone else, or at least, they don't want the visual of it."

He rolled his eyes and scoffed. "Then human males are complete idiots. Fomorian males are not looking for virgin females. We like our woman to know what they want, when they want it, and how they want it. When our women have high sex drives, it's a very attractive quality. We do everything possible to encourage it, in fact. The more consorts a female can keep happy, the more attractive she is."

Elatha sat down beside me and took my hand. "It's also a function of biology. A pregnant female has an elevated sex drive because sex during pregnancy transfers energy to her. The more the pregnancy progresses, the more energy she needs for herself and the growing child. Fomorian consorts all play a role in helping the female care for the child by having sex with her to recharge her energy, regardless of which of them actually provided the sperm to create the child. All the males benefit from her increased energetic demands."

His answer was so unexpected that I thought about the physiology for a few minutes. The biological and evolutionary pressures that would create that kind of interaction were intriguing. As I considered the idea from various aspects, it made perfect sense to my scientific brain. Of course, it would be true for any pregnant female of any immortal race that gained energy from sex.

Oh... 

Oh my god!

I am such an idiot!

Was that why my arousal was off the charts around Elatha? It certainly wasn't around any other male immortals except Loki. Being a fertility goddess and pregnant, did my body know what it needed to keep enough energy for myself and my child? 

But... why was Elatha capable of recharging me and other immortal males weren't? Or was it that I hadn't been as energy deprived when the Sidhe took me? Or the dwarves weren't compatible? Or was it that they were capable, but something else was going on? My captors had been disgusting, so maybe that made the difference. Even the thought of them made my stomach revolt. There had to be more to it than a simple biological compatibility.

Neither Frigga nor Healer Moja had warned me of this. The most Healer Moja had said was to monitor my energy levels and to recharge when necessary.

Gods! Why didn't they warn me?

Was it something to do with me being an elf? Maybe it worked differently for Aesir and Vanir? Or did they not warn me since Loki was a fertility god? He could easily supply the energy I needed and keep up with me. They didn't anticipate I'd be away from Loki for weeks and weeks on end, especially in my third trimester, when I'd need his help the most.

What does that mean for me?

Each day, I tired more quickly. Being in the sea had helped, but I was still losing weight on top of what I'd lost during my captivity. Before we'd left the outpost, I'd had to tuck Loki's ring into a pouch on my suit. It wouldn't stay on any of my fingers now, not even my thumb, and I was afraid I'd lose it. My son had been active this morning when I woke, but was quiet again. What was it doing to him to be so deprived of energy? The sea on its own wasn't enough.

Damn. The sea on its own isn't enough. Not enough. Fuck.

"Did I upset you? You are looking very serious," Elatha said, looking into my eyes with concern.

"No. You didn't upset me, but it did help me understand some of what is going on with me," I said quietly as I tried to work out what I needed to do. 

My brain understood the necessity, the logic, yet my heart was having a harder time with it. My stomach churned with the impossible choice. But it wasn't really a choice at this point, not any longer. There was no way I could knowingly allow my child to suffer. What had my lack of knowledge already put him through? The answer scared me. 

"Loki and I are both fertility gods. Do you know what that means? Do Fomorians have fertility gods?" I asked, looking back at him.

"No, we don't. I've heard of them, but only in the simplest of terms, that they like lots of sex," he grinned.

Of course. I rolled my eyes. "It's not that simple. Just as pregnant Fomorians get energy from sex, so do fertility gods. They also have high sex drives. They can have sex over and over repeatedly, without getting tired or needing to recover in-between, because of the energy they get from it."

Elatha nodded. "It sounds like the way our physiology works, but for all Fomorians, not just a few."

I agreed and continued, "But I'm not just a fertility goddess. I'm also a goddess of the forests and seas, so I get energy from being around forests and in salt water."

"Okay, that should be a good thing, right?" he asked. "You have multiple ways of recharging yourself."

"Yes, it should. But just like what you told me about pregnant Fomorians, I need an increasing amount of energy to support myself and my child as he grows. Loki and I had realized this before my capture. We ensured that I was getting an energy boost one way or another at least once a day during my second trimester. But then I got kidnapped. My captors didn't know I was pregnant. They were draining me faster than I could recharge. Since then, I've lost considerable weight. At the point the dwarves finally gave me a salt water bath, I could barely stay conscious. For more than five weeks, I've been at an energy deficit that my child has had to draw entirely from me. The salt water alone isn't recharging me sufficiently as I'm still losing weight. It's why I'm getting more and more exhausted, faster each day." 

I stopped, needed to blink back tears from eyes gone hot as the full horror of what my child was experiencing hit me. "It's why my son is less and less active each day. I have no energy reserves left to draw on, so he's grown lethargic and unable to move."

Oh gods. My baby. 

"What are you saying, Shannon?" Elatha asked, his tone carefully neutral even as his eyes kept flicking to my abdomen, worry starkly apparent.

"Unless you can get me to Loki in time, I think..." I paused to swallow, having a hard time continuing with what I knew I had to say. "Elatha, I... I need you to recharge me. My baby isn't active the way he should be. My lack of energy is hurting him. Please, I need you to save my child," I finally said quietly, battling with my conflicted emotions.

"Are you sure about what you are asking, Shannon? Have no doubt, I'm completely willing, but I don't want to cross a line that you were adamant you didn't want to cross. I hate making you cry. It hurts to see you so upset. Please be sure, okay?" Elatha said gently, stroking my hand in his.

"I'm not going to lie. This is hard for me. I'm holding out for Loki as long as I can. But if I get to the point where you need to revive me in the sea, I'm asking you to save us. Both of us. Please Elatha. I can't lose my child." I lost the battle to hold the tears back as they spilled down my cheeks.

Elatha blinked hard, his beautiful starburst eyes sad as he nodded his agreement. "I will, I promise."

Gratefully, I leaned against his shoulder and closed my eyes.