The servants pressed their lips in a thin line in fear as they came near the Monarch. It was usually the guards who gave him breakfast almost as if he was a prisoner.

However what the poor servants did not know was that Monarch himself was scared. He trembled besides me as they spread his platter before us. My hand was firmly placed on his arm and I gave him occasional smiles to reassure him. He didn't look at me as he continued staring at the food before him.

He just needed something to look at.

The guards were inside the room too just in case they were needed.  I didn't like their presence but at the same time, I knew it was important for them to stay for the servants. I could handle the Monarch but I was not sure I could not handle the fearful ladies.

I smiled in gratitude as they left the room in a hurried manner. The guard -- whose hand I had slapped when he had tried to close the door -- raised an eyebrow. I shook my head. No, I did not want the door to be closed.

Going outside was too big a step to take. I had been wrong. I needed to split it into small steps. First breakfast with me, then maybe in few days or so, I would make him have breakfast with my brother and I.

This may seem like a foolish thing from another man's  perspective but it was nice to have a plan. It was nice to form goals in my mind so that I know I was making some type of progress. It helped me be sane.

I offered Qamar my practiced smile as I pulled a napkin and placed it on his lap. He looked up at me, trembling slightly, but not as much now that the people were gone. He didn't  still like the idea of keeping the door open.

It didn't matter.

I pointed at the tea set that the servants had placed properly on the table. He looked at it and then shook his head.

I pointed at the fruit tray that was placed before us. He didn't look at it so I clicked my finger under his face. He looked at me, startled. I pointed at the tray again.

He shook his head.

I sighed and looked up. I prayed for patience, I knew he was not doing intentionally to annoy me. I confused him and he had trouble understanding what I meant. It didn't help that I had no tongue.

I looked at the Monarch and pleaded with my eyes. Couldn't he just take a small step towards what I wanted?

He stared at me but I knew he was inside his mind again. I sighed as I started filling my plate with food. I grabbed a bread and started nibbling on it as he continued to stare at me.

I poured some tea for myself and added two sugar cubes on the set and started stirring it with a spoon. I could feel his eyes on me but I ignored him.

I felt immature at my way of making him to do something but he had left me with no options. I was inexperienced regarding this matter. I was doing things based purely on instinct.

"Tea." Qamar managed after a while of staring at me. I was done with my breakfast by then.

I turned towards him and flashed him a big smile. He didn't  return it and I wondered how he looked when he smiled. I glanced at the portrait of him and his family, which served as a reminder of what he had lost, he was very handsome. He looked even more handsome when he smiled.

I poured him some tea and placed his cup before him. He eyed the cup curiously and then glanced at the open door. He would have done everything I wanted him to do if the door was not open.

"I..." He didn't pick up the cup, "I remember...." he stared at me oddly.

What? I motioned with my hand. But I was confused. What was he trying to say? What did he remember?

And then a realisation hit me and I couldn't help but smile even more widely. This was the first time he had initiated a conversation by himself! I couldn't help but be pleased.

"Iqra," He said and then glanced at the portrait on top of his bed, "She..." he looked at me.

I motioned him to continue and hoped that my facial expression was showing enough interest for him to do so.

I was a little scared too. Was he seeing a vision of Iqra? He was not trembling nor was he clutching his head. He looked fine.

"Iqra used to force me to eat breakfast with her too." He whispered mostly to himself. I wouldn't have heard if I was not sitting so close to him.

A happy memory!

I wanted to feel like dancing! My stupid method and yielded some result. He had initiated a conversation and shared a happy memory with me.

Today was a good day!

I smiled encouragingly. He was staring at his hands, "She wanted us to have this time. She wanted her face to be the first thing I see."

I could imagine them having breakfast in this room. I glanced at the Monarch and sadness filled my heart. He had genuinely loved her. The love he had for her; it was rare like a gift. It was written in stories and chanted out in songs. I looked at the queen. Did she miss him as much as he missed her wherever she was?

I wished I could say to the Monarch that the Queen and him. They were beautiful together. How could I make him understand?

In response, I simply placed my hand on his. He looked at his cup and then gently took it and brought it to his lips. He took a sip, glanced towards the door, and kept the cup back.

"You..." He looked at me oddly and then looked away, "Can I rest?"

Even though he hadn't eaten anything, I nodded. He would eat on his own whenever he felt like. I had pushed him too much already. I smiled as he stood up and sat on the bed his back facing me. He layed on the bed.

I stood up and he glanced at me,

"Close the door." It was a whisper but a command.

I nodded even though he had turned away.

I closed the door as I stepped outside.

__

"I heard you had a successful day."

I hadn't even reached the door to my room when Master Wali popped out of the blue. He took me by surprise and I stared at him wide eyed.

"I know everything happening in the palace, Miss Ayah, even when you think I don't."

I nodded.

"Congratulations!" He offered me a smile and then his face turned serious, "Now tell me how a seventeen years old succeeded in making the Monarch act somewhat normally when other experienced couldn't."

I shrugged. What was the point? He wouldn't understand what I would say.

"You!" The small man barked at a passing by servant as he started walking, "Get me someone who can translate her for me! Please."

I didn't know whether to feel insulted or annoyed when he said that. I decided to ignore him as I sat on my own bed and he sat on a chair.

He was staring at me with a frown. Was he displeased that I had made the Monarch do something nice? Wasn't it why he had asked me to come in the palace?

"What can you do, Miss Ayah?" He mumbled to himself.

"I see you," he looked straight into my eyes, "And I feel this strange energy you emit. I do not know what it is. You are not a healer, no; so what are you? What is this silver glow I see that reminds me of the Moon?"

I froze at the mention of the Moon. Did this man know my secret? But it had been months since I had talked to the Moon! She had stopped it or maybe I had. I didn't remember. I didn't know.

"There is a light within you," Master Wali continued talking to himself as if I was not there, "I wonder what it can do."

"Ayah!" My brother interrupted his rambling as he rushed inside, "Master Wali..."

"Save your breath, boy." Master Wali said and Asad shot him a look and then looked at me.

"I thought something had happened..."

I shook my head but Master Wali had something else to say,

"Why else would I call you?"

My brother frowned at the mixed response.

"What happened?"

"Your sister succeeded in doing what no one else could." Master Wali said in an exaggerated air.

Asad raised an eyebrow, "Which is?"

"She made the Monarch behave normally even if it was for a...second."

The way he said things. I glared at the man. The Monarch had behaved perfectly fine this morning. He had talked to me. It was more than a second!

"How?" Asad asked wide eyed.

"She had breakfast with him and she made sure that the door to his room was open."

"The Monarch," Asad struggled, "He didn't do anything?"

"No." Master Wali answered for her.

"How?" Asad repeated his question.

How could I tell them that I had no answer to it? When it came to the Monarch, I perfectly did things on whim. He reacted when I did things instinctively.

I don't know, I answered honestly.

"She doesn't know." Asad translated.

"What did you do to him?" Master Wali asked.

"She cannot do anything to him," Asad said, "Nor can she say anything."

"So why is he responding to her?"

"Maybe..." Asad looked at me with hesitant eyes uncomfortable about what he was going to say next, "Maybe he pities her."

I felt something burn in my chest as I stared at my brother. Did he really think that? Did he think that the Monarch only responded to me because he pitied me?

"I am dwarf!" Master Wali exclaimed, "I am insulted.He should pity me too!"

Asad didn't listen as he stared at me. He was seeing my reaction. I didn't give him any.

"It is not pity, boy!" Master Wali said, "An insane grieving man does not pity anyone but himself. It is what drives them insane in the first place."

I could not believe that I was siding with this man against my own brother. But I felt insulted by brother's statement. Why would he say something like that? Is that really what he thought of me?

Incapable.

"Your sister is special, Asad," Wali said looking at me, "She is also different than most. Don't label her hard work something as lowly as pity."

"It was a theory," Asad explained and then turned towards me, "Did you feel bad?"

I smiled and shook my head. It had been a while since I lied to my own brother.

Master Wali eyed me but didn't say anything. Could he read my mind too? Or was it simply the power, he said, I emitted.

He could be lying too. I could not trust that man. But I felt deflated, my happy bubble pierced by the words of my own brother.My sense of accomplishment gone.

Was it weird that I felt more comfortable around an insane man than my own brother now?

I had changed.

Everything will change.

It had been long since the voice of the Moon had echoed in my mind. She had told me, she had warned; I would change.

Was this change good? Was this change bad? Did this mean that Asad and I could never be the same again?

"You felt bad, didn't you?" Asad asked once Master Wali went after staying for a long discussing how I had managed to do something so unexpected. The discussion had lead to no conclusion. But he had liked talking about it.

I shook my head.

"When did you start lying to me, Ay?" Asad asked me as he sat beside him.

When did you start to feel so distant, brother? I wanted to ask. I wanted to ask this so bad to him. Where was he? What did he do? Where did he go?

"I am sorry." he said looking At me with his eyes. His hair had grown, he had grown. He sat taller now and he had matured too. I could see it in his eyes and the way he held himself.

How is the training? I asked.

"I am doing surprisingly well. Aqib is strangely proud of me," He smiled, "He says I might just become a man."

Aqib...

Maybe it was not my brother who had become distant. Maybe it had been me. I thought  we were doing well, that we were slowly getting back to where we were.

Maybe I was expecting too much of my brother and offering little in return.

"You should come visit us," Asad said, "We miss you."

I nodded. I should. My brother was my link to the normal world. I kept forgetting it but I shouldn't.

I shouldn't, I repeated to myself in my head.

I am sorry too, I rested my head against his shoulder and he wrapped an arm around me.

"You're doing something so hard. I know you think we may not understand what you are going through but talk to us. We can help you, at the very least, we can be your ears."

I nodded again.

"We may not be as great as the Monarch himself," he joked, "But together we can do, you know?"

I bit my lip as a slow smile appeared on my face. Maybe all was not bad after all.