TW: mild sexual content, blood

"You really shouldn't be studying."

"Funny that, because you really should," I countered, stifling a yawn as I repeated my English notes onto a piece of spare paper in an effort to recite them to memory.
"One; touché," Lloyd replied as he grabbed the back of his desk chair I was on and turned it around. The pen nib ran across the page and I whined, sending him a pout as he shifted me to face him. His expression was insistent. "Second; my point still stands. Your energy is being used to heal your body. You should be resting, not stressing yourself out."
I sighed, reaching out to grab the desk and turn myself back around. His grip gave me no such chance. I gave up, sending his pretty face an exhausted, desperate look.
"I can't not study," I complained, slumping back into the chair. "Exams start next Monday, Lloyd."
"Have you even called your mother yet?" he asked, raising one brown eyebrow. I felt my heart hitch in panic and my eyes widen before I closed them tight. I released a heavy, tired sigh. Lloyd eyed the way I dropped my throbbing head into my hands and sent me a sympathetic smile.

"You're overworking yourself," he murmured, slipping his deft hands around my wrists and sliding them up to hook through my fingers. He brought them away from my face and I gave a defeated frown. "Relax, doll. You'll do fine."
"We have very different ideals of 'fine' when it comes to education," I reminded, sending him a lethargic, amused look. "My fine is getting perfect grades and a full scholarship to any college I want. Your fine is showing up to the exam."
"It's more than what some other people do," Lloyd pointed out. "You say that like I'm not smart."
"You are smart," I corrected, pulling him forward by our linked hands so I could rest my head on his shoulder. "Just not in the conventional, education system way."
"I am so," he sniffed. "I just don't do the assignments properly."
"Lloyd," I snickered, sinking into his warmth and letting myself soak in his scent. Rainforests and spring meadows had never smelt so enticing. "You once asked the difference between Beethoven and beetroot."

"They sound similar!" Lloyd defended before pulling away and bringing out his phone. "Whatever, you nerd. Go back to studying."
I rolled my eyes with a tired smile, turning myself back to the books and picking up from where I had been interrupted.
"Hey, second mom," Lloyd greeted, making my pen freeze. "Yep, she's fine. Still really tired. Sorry she didn't call, she thinks studying is more important than family."
"Lloyd!" I chided as I turned back around, betrayed. "Stop putting words in my mouth. Gimme the phone."
He handed me the device with a teasing smirk. I gave him a half-hearted scowl as I held the phone up to my ear.
"Hey, mom."
"Y/n, thank goodness," mum said in a relieved rush. "I heard you were shot!"
"Yep," I said, dropping my head back against the chair and rubbing my temple. Lloyd opened up his closet doors and I eyed him as he began to change out of his training clothes to get into his gi. "I- I'm fine."
"Fine?!" she repeated incredulously and I had to remind myself that my mother was on the phone as Lloyd, only wearing his boxers, wiggled his eyebrows tantalisingly. I struggled to keep from snorting. "You needed stitches!"

"Which should be coming out soon," I reminded, turning my gaze up to the ceiling. "I'm totally fine. A little sore and tired, but other that - I feel okay."
In the background, I could hear Lloyd do up his various buckles and clasps. I played with a loose thread on Nya's sweatpants - I'd have to get changed into some of my own clothes soon. I should buy myself some more sweatpants. I made a mental note to go shopping one night and grab some; maybe get some clothes for the approaching summer, too.
Maybe a nice bikini. For no particular reason.
"I'll be out in twenty," Mum said. "Do you know how long you'll stay there for? I can take you home if you want."
"Not sure," I sighed, shifting my head to the side. The budding maple and sakura trees trembled in the slight, afternoon breeze. The grass was lush and long from the hectic spring weather. I smiled at the vibrant colours. It reminded me of Lloyd. "I think I'll stay, though."

I jumped a little in surprise when Lloyd silently approached and ran whispering hands down my clothed arms. He dropped his chin on top of my head.
"Okay, then," mom said. I could hear the slight hint of protective reluctance in her voice. "Are you and Lloyd on speaking terms?"
The man himself dragged his lips down the side of my face and left a blushing, burning fire in his wake. He nipped gently along my jaw and I chomped down hard on my bottom lip to keep from breathing a whine.
"Y- yeah," I stuttered before giving my throat a clear. Grabbing his face, I pushed it away with a grunt. He sniggered. "More or less."
"That's good to hear," mom sighed. "It'll be good to no longer have you moping around like a loser."
"Hey," I frowned mockingly. "Words hurt."
Ironic, considering. She still laughed and my own smile pulled at my lips. Lloyd tugged on his mask and crossed his arms, waiting.

"I hope you aren't going to be studying all afternoon," mom began, voice stern as she started yet another motherly ramble. "You should be resting! You can do your studying when that uh - tea, was it? - wears off."
"Told you," Lloyd whispered, voice muffled. I swatted him away and he snickered, catching my hand.
"I know," I groaned, bristling at the unplanned gang up. "I'll rest, I promise."
"I have to go on patrol," Lloyd continued, voice hushed before pressing a parting kiss to my knuckles and pulling his mask back up. With energy I didn't know I still had, my hand whipped out and caught his belt before he could leave. He blinked in surprise. I stared at the desktop, knee bouncing.
"You should call your father. He's been worrying."
"Yep yep okay," I said quickly, nodding frantically even though she couldn't see it. "I- uh, I have to go pee I'll see you soon bye-!"

I quickly ended the call before tossing Lloyd's phone onto the bed and turning my eyes up to him. His brows were raised expectantly.
"You seriously can't be thinking that I'll let you leave without a proper kiss, right?" I asked, tilting my head. My forehead throbbed but I ignored it, giving a weak, tired yank on his belt. He stepped forward with it and dropped his hands on either side of the armrests, red eyes burning and boiling as I pulled his mask up his face and onto his head.
"Sorry," Lloyd teased with a giant grin, tapping his nose to mine. "That was rude of me."
"It was," I sniffed before caving and breaking into a goofy, infatuated smile. "You need to be quick, green ninja. Your team is waiting for you."
His grin widened before he dropped to press a lingering, soft kiss to my lips. My hands slowly found their way into his hair, threading and twirling the soft blond strands as I arched my back into the too-large gap between us, yearning to be closer.

Lloyd pulled away far too quick and while I was still disoriented, he yanked the hood up and over my head and tightened the strings.
"Aye!" I shouted in surprise, only making him laugh. By the time I finally worked myself out of my trap, hair messy and cheeks flushed, he was already long gone.

"Jerk," I mumbled, but only felt the warm, fulfilling feeling of adoration swirling throughout my very veins.

🍃🍂🍁🍂🍃

"You passed out again."

"nO i diD NOT-" I yelled, words slurring as I quickly lifted my head from the desk. Dried drool kept my loose page of notes stuck to my cheek. It was peeled off with a boyish chuckle.
"I'm pretty sure you did," Lloyd said as he pulled his mask from his sweaty, grimy head. His hair floofed out, equally as dirty. I eyed him up and down.
"Busy patrol?" I asked.
"You could say that," Lloyd sighed before nodding at my copious amount of notes. "Busy studying?"
"You could say that," I echoed tiredly, rubbing my bleary eyes. Mum had been and gone and aside from stepping away to engage with her and reassure her nerves, I'd been studying the entire time the team was out. It was already dark.

I fought a yawn and failed, dropping the side of my head onto my arm as Lloyd de-robed until he was just in his green pants and black turtleneck. The wraps on his calves and arms took longer to unravel but were still swiftly done more so than a normal person would.
"Have you been at it the entire time I was on patrol?" Lloyd asked, voice tinged with disappointment. I closed my eyes.
"Yeah."
"Sunshine-"
"I know," I groaned. "But I really need to ace these exams."
"You're going to burn yourself out," he pointed out worriedly. "Then what will you have to show for your hard work?"
I pouted, but ultimately couldn't find a loophole in his reasoning. He quickly changed the topic, however, and gently lifted me back up into a normal sitting position.

"Let's take a look at your wound," he murmured, going to roll up my pant leg before finding it stuck at the top of my calf. "Uh-"
"Hold on," I sighed, pushing the bottom of the pant leg back down and lifting my hips, shimmying the waist hem until it hit underneath the bandage. "Better?"
Lloyd, face aflame, could only squeak in response. His red gaze flickered. I stared at him dryly, blush darkening. My expression was a facade to the scared horny scream inside my head but there was also grumbling, because I was too tired for that bs.
"Lloyd."
"R- right," he stammered, unrolling the bandage Garm had put on my leg the night before and pulling it away. Each time his fingers brushed against the skin of the inside of my thigh, I felt my heart do an electric jolt.
The injury was still pink and tender but Lloyd seemed pleased with how much it had healed. I was in awe.

"Whoa," I breathed, poking the stitches before Lloyd made me quit by catching my hand. "That's insane."
"Makes the drawbacks worth it, right?" he grinned. I nodded, silent in stunned disbelief. "I think we can get dad to take it out now."
"Really?" I asked, voice pitched in surprise. "It hasn't even been twenty-four hours yet!"
"That's how good it works," Lloyd huffed in amusement, bringing me up to stand before pulling the top of my pants back up to rest along my hips. I tried not to focus too much on the feeling over his fingers against my skin.
He stepped away quickly and I watched him while an unexplainable ball of nerves and agitation tossed in my stomach. Lloyd grabbed a pair of my shorts and held them out for me. I stared, confused.
"You'll give my old man a heart attack if you pull down your pants," Lloyd reasoned, quirking a brow in amusement. I snatched the shorts, face growing redder by the second.
"Don't," I snapped, embarrassed. "Shut."
He rolled his eyes with a grin, closing the doors while I got changed. I caught sight of my previously injured feet - not even a scar was left. I frowned.

"Does the tea heal scars?" I asked, glancing up at Lloyd. My eyes fell to his large scar, hidden by his shirt. "Wait- but-"
"It depends on how bad it is," he explained, holding out a hand for me to take. I slipped my fingers through his with an excited pump of my heart. "The bullet wound will scar."
"Oh," I said.
Lloyd looked like he wanted to say something more but held his tongue. With a tense gulp, he turned away and began leading me towards the medbay. I started lethargically stumbling halfway down the hall, so he swooped me up into his arms. I stared at his face as he walked, his jaw tensed. I couldn't help but wonder if he was still angry at me for the fight. I know I would be. So what was this - some kind of brief truce? A simple sweep under the rug because we were both knocked with some sense about the true fragility of a human life?
But that's not good. Sweeping what happened under the rug and pretending that everything was fine and okay meant that it was bound to blow up in our faces later.

I didn't want to ruin this peace, though - as a living lie as it was. How could I bring it up without it descending into an argument and resulting in us going our seperate ways once more?
My skull was truly hammering now and my eyes stung with exhaustion. It was clear that either way, I wasn't in my right mind for a heavy discussion. Instead, I dug my head into his chest and closed my eyes, listening to his heartbeat. I could live in this false peace for a little while longer.
"Hey, dad," I heard Lloyd say, voice vibrating in his chest and sending pleasant tingles against my head. "Should the stitches come out?"
I heard his dad reply but I was teetering too much on the edge of consciousness to be able to understand his words. Lloyd began walking once more, the gentle sway edging me more towards sleep.

"Why don't you do them yourself?" Garmadon asked as I sat on the gurney, eyes blinking heavily. The stress of studying had truly caught up and smashed me in the back.
"Your hands are steadier," Lloyd replied.
"Alright, lazy."
"Hey-!" Lloyd said, insulted. A weary smile pulled at my lips.
"Okay, Y/n," Garmadon said, bringing out some small scissors to begin cutting the thread. "Stay still."
"M' gonn fall asleep," I mumbled my reply, leaning my head against Lloyd. "M' not movin.'"
I must've stuck to my word, because the next time I opened my eyes, I was back in bed with Lloyd's duvet pulled up tight. I sat up, rubbing my eyes. He wasn't in the room.
Sleepily, I pushed back the duvet to stare at the wound. It was still gnarish and irritated, but nothing time and care won't fix. It took at least a week and a half to get to that point with the shot on my arm, anyway. I could deal with it a little longer.
I eyed my notes on Lloyd's desk. Kicking back the covers, I slipped from bed and made my way over.

"Nope."
An arm wrapped around my waist and hauled me back. I squeaked in surprise before giving a whine, feet kicking.
"Y/n, you're a workaholic," Lloyd stressed, making me fall back onto the bed with one hand, the other holding dinner. I groaned, rolling in the covers like a child's tantrum.
"I'm nooooot."
"You are," he insisted. "Now eat."
"Fine," I sniffed, sitting up and taking the plate. "Bossy."
"I'm looking out for you," Lloyd said as he sat down after bringing his laptop to the bed.
"I know," I reassured, shifting back so we were sitting against the headboard, side by side. "... bossy."
His stare was dry. I grinned shamelessly, lifting the bowl of noodles and beginning to dig in. It was good, not Zane-level, though. I don't think anybody could be as good as Zane. He was god tier.
"How long did I sleep for?" I asked, slurping the tasty noodles. Lloyd checked the time on the laptop as he signed in and brought up Netflix.
"Couple of hours," he replied before slowly scrolling. "Pick a movie."

I picked out a cute anime movie that I'd been meaning to watch for a few weeks. It was obviously a romance, so I couldn't bring myself to watch it before less I got crushed by the stifling feeling of absolute loneliness. But I could now. I guess.
Plus, it looked nice and soft. I needed a nice and soft movie.
A bunch of times I caught myself beginning to doze off. I forced myself to stay awake, but it was so difficult as I snuggled against Lloyd's side - he was so comforting and warm - and dinner made me feel satisfied and sleepy.
"You're allowed to fall asleep, you know," Lloyd whispered, brushing his lips against my hair.
"I haven't brushed my teeth yet," I replied, just as hushed. The anime boy's arms turned into cat paws. "And I want to see the finish."
"Stubborn," he murmured, but didn't make a move to stop the film. I sleepily smiled, letting myself fall back into the story.
I ended up crying from the sweet ending - of course I did, I always cried - and he found humour in my tears.

"You cry in everything," Lloyd reminisced, grinning as he caught a tear with his finger and pulled it from my cheek.
"I know," I sniffled, wiping my face with my sleeves. "I'm trying to not be so emotional."
"Nah." Lloyd shook his head. "You shouldn't worry about stuff like that."
I sent him a squinted, confused look. That was a far cry from what Nya had said. She told me to try and get more control.
"What?"
"Just continue being yourself," he continued, pulling my hand up to his mouth. "Yourself is the best version of you you can be."
I pulled a smile. "Did you get that from your dad?"
"Mom, actually," Lloyd corrected, grinning against my knuckles. "I wish I was more like you."

Now I was truly lost.
"Wh- what?" I stammered, stunned. A confused laugh slipped through my lips.
"You're so unguarded about your emotions," Lloyd cut the beginnings of my tell-tale ramble short. "You're so open and trusting. You can actually talk whereas I- I struggle."
Another tear fell down my cheek and I was silent in surprise. He gave an impish smile as he kissed it away.
"You're so pretty when you cry," he murmured, cradling my neck. The proximity made my heart hammer. I bunched my eyebrows at his words.
"Should I be concerned by that?" I asked, grinning a little nervously.
"Not sad crying," Lloyd corrected, brushing the bridge of his nose up my cheek to press a kiss to my temple. "I mean happy crying. Like when..."

His words trailed off and his face twisted into something profoundly unsatisfying. I frowned in concern, placing my hand on his arm.
"Like..?" I tried, tilting my head curiously. My forehead was still pounding. I should probably grab some painkillers soon.
"Nothing," he said with a false smile, bringing his lips back down to press little kisses to my jaw. "My mind was just wandering."
I hummed in acknowledgement, though remained unconvinced that it really was just 'nothing.' Lloyd's mouth dropped to my throat and I would've let myself fall into the blissful trap that was him kissing my neck if it weren't for the increased throbbing of my head. I edged away and he chased, pressing gentle kiss after gentle kiss.
"Lloyd," I groaned, dropping my cheek onto his shoulder. He tensed before pausing, concerned by my tone. "My head hurts."
There was a silent beat before he gave a sigh, pulling himself away.
"Sorry."
"Don't be sorry," Lloyd murmured. "Let's get you some more of that tea."
"Eughhh can I just have paracetamol instead?" I pleaded, shuddering at the memory of the garbage-tasting tea.

"It's not as effective," he reasoned, lifting me up so I could slump against his front like a child. I hooked my feet behind his back.
"At least it doesn't taste like a rat's ass," I grumbled into his shoulder. He gave a hearty chuckle, carrying me down the quiet, sleeping monastery. The headache gave a mighty, merciless throb and I gritted my teeth into holding back a whining cry.
"It hurrrts," I complained, digging my face into his neck.
"You did it to yourself, sweetheart," Lloyd chided in a gently stern remark. "Overworking does that."
I huffed through my nose, falling silent. Dammit. Why did he have to be right all of the time? Most of the time. Anything that wasn't school.
I sullenly watched from the bench as Lloyd busied himself in hand-brewing the healing tea. It took a hefty amount of time for something that tasted like trash juice. Lloyd turned with an amused grin at my disgusted expression before handing me the steaming mug and watching as I stared down at the murky, grey water with a grimace. He waited for me to finally muster up the nerve to down the drink and when I finally did, he gave me a congratulatory pat on my head.

"Well done."
"Do you enjoy torturing me?"
Lloyd snickered at my dry tone, taking the mug from me to wash it out in the sink and put it in the dishwasher. At least I didn't have to have a tweezer poking around in my flesh this time while I waited for the tea to kick in.
"Ready to go back to bed?" Lloyd asked, turning back to me as he leant against the bench opposite mine and wiped his hands dry with a hand towel. I scrunched my nose.
"Not really," I confessed. "But I will, only for your sake."
"My hero," Lloyd sighed lovingly while I stretched out my arms and made grabby hands. "How the tables have turned."
"Pickmeup," I complained, grabby hands growing more insistent. His grin grew humorously.
"Such a valiant hero," he continued to sing, voice dreamy and teasing and filling me with shivers from my head to the very tip of my curling toes. "Who wants to be carried to bed."
"Llooooyyd," I cried, pouting in frustration.

"Okay, alright," he laughed, picking me up from the bench. I immediately latched on like a koala. "I spoil you, princess."
"You do," I agreed, pressing a kiss to his cheek. "My prince. Hey, I can say that unironically!"
"What? Oh," Lloyd nodded in understanding. "Because I'm the blood heir and all that."
"'And all that,'" I echoed with a snort. "You talk it down so much, prince."
"You really gonna call me that?" he asked as he effortlessly carried me down the hallway. "Isn't it a little cheesy?"
"You call me princess," I pointed out. His lips quirked a smile and he gave a little nod.
"Touché."
In all actuality, I'd never been more awake. The stuff must've finally worn off. Unfortunately, the timing couldn't have been more awful - it was eleven at night. What was I supposed to do at eleven at night if I'm sleepless but my ninja (ex???) boyfriend definitely needed his rest?

Actually, it seemed that my perfect answer was a simple one. After Lloyd and I dove under the covers and resurfaced with our heads on the pillows, I shuffled closer so I could listen to his heartbeat. Rain had begun to fall sometime earlier and it created the sweetest of symphonies, the most homely of harmonies. His soft, even, slumbering breaths was the perfect beat.
I traced nonsense on his shirt, feeling the bump in his chest from the large scar. I splayed my hand across it and inwardly cursed at the scar - not for exisiting, because every scratch and bump of Lloyd's was a roadmap that I wanted to learn all about and to join in on for the rest of my life - but for the lack of confidence it brought him. He was so pretty already and there are times that he acts like he knows that he's good-looking, but at the end of the day...
I clenched my hands over the shirt. I wanted to eradicate every negativity of his life that I could. Every doubt, every insecurity. I wanted him to be happy.
I wanted to be happy with him, too.

This happy lie that we'd begun to live would never guarantee our prolonged content. It would shatter when we needed it most. I knew it would. It's done that before.
Lloyd mumbled something incoherent in his sleep and slithered closer, dropping his head atop of mine. A sigh tumbled through his lips and it brushed against my hair. I held my own sigh. Cuddled closer, mind a rush, seeking his comfort. Only one thing repeated in my head as I held him as tightly as he held me in the middle of the night.

We really needed to talk.

🍃🍂🍁🍂🍃

"You should be staying home."

"I can't," I replied to Cole as we sat at the table for breakfast. "It's the last week of school before exams. I have to go. Besides, I'm fine!"
The team shared the same expression - doubt.
"See?" I said, hopping up to prove myself and giving a little jump. The injured leg buckled. Lloyd calmly caught me before I could face plant onto the table.
"Not my finest attempt," I admitted in a huff, blowing the hair from my face.
"Yeah," Jay said, pouting in seriousness like a puppy who'd just lost its toy to a cat. "You're staying home."
I dropped my head back with a mighty groan.
"But I feel fine!" I insisted, slumping my head sideways onto Lloyd's shoulder.
"You feel fine but you're not," he countered. "It's just for today. You won't miss much."
"It might be enough between an A and a B," I dryly cried. "I need an A!"

"You need to rest," Nya stressed as she finished off her breakfast. "Getting shot is serious."
"You guys don't think it's serious when you get shot," I grumbled.
"We're different," Kai shrugged. "We're hardy. You're... not."
My eyes jumped to him and I straightened. The fire ninja raised his brows, awaiting my reply as I stared him down.
"Did you just call me fragile?" I asked, tone dead.
"As a flower," Kai grinned, leaning forward tauntingly. I pointed a chopstick at him threateningly.
"I will hurt you."
"Okay-" Lloyd said, taking the chopstick from my grasp and putting it down onto the table. "Let's not kill each other at the breakfast table. You guys need to get ready for school."
"Are you not coming?" Zane asked. Lloyd shook his head.
"Gotta make sure this one doesn't accidentally kill herself," he said, patting my knee.

Turns out, Lloyd didn't have a choice.
"Sorry, but your grades are atrocious," Misako said while she penned something down on a notebook as she studied a piece of what looked to be normal rock. "Green ninja or not, if you fail this year, they'll keep you back. And I'll let them."
Lloyd groaned at his misfortune before trudging back to his room to change out of his sport clothes from morning training into something school-appropriate. I watched from the bed as he shoved his textbooks into his bag.
"... Lloyd?" I asked quietly, pulling the blanket tighter around myself. I felt vulnerable and fragile. Maybe Kai was right - just a little. "Can we talk?"
He paused. Back to me, I couldn't see his expression.
"What about?" he asked, voice small and hesitant. I furrowed my brow in reluctance but pressed forth. It had to be done.
"You know what," I noted, balling my hands into tensed fists. He released a short breath and swung his bag over his shoulder. Lloyd's red eyes found mine. They looked cold and stern.

"Not now."
I swallowed.
"Lloyd-" I tried, voice soft and soothing as I hoped to prompt him to indulge in me.
"I said not now," he snapped. I scrunched my face in frustration.
"Why is it so hard for you to talk?" I pitched, voice raising despite my attempts to keep calm. I just wanted to know why, I wanted to talk about this so we could put it behind us and move on! "Is it some kind of mental block or something?"
"I don't know!" Lloyd cried, clearly growing annoyed and defensive. "I don't know! So just- leave it, okay! I'll talk to you when I feel like you're not just going to push me aside again like everyone else."
I paused. I stared. His words echoed in my ears.
I knew I was an awful person, but was I really that horrible? Did Lloyd think I was that horrible? Then why was he- why did he act so affectionate recently? Was it just to make me feel better? Was it just to build up my hope that we could be together once more? Or were we both simply acting on a selfish desire to hold each other and shove aside the warning bells?

Lloyd paused. He stared. He watched as I slowly deflated and became weighed down by the harsh resurface of every single insecurity that I tried so hard to repress. Every stupid mistake, every thoughtless word. My throat grew thick. My eyes stung.
Of course he wouldn't want to talk to me after what I'd done. I'm a terrible person. Who would even want to keep me around? Who was I to doubt Lloyd and then turn around to ask to talk? It was a lack of communication on my end that got us here. I should be begging on my knees, not demanding a chance to have his audience.
I sunk in on myself and I couldn't hold his piercing gaze. My eyes dropped to the duvet. I was small, I felt small, I was tiny in front of Lloyd. Nothing more than a worthless, stupid bug.
"... okay," I said quietly, voice hitching in sorrow and an insane amount of regret. It was nothing new to me. Sorrow and regret consumed me on the regular. A mistake I couldn't seem to fix.

Lloyd faltered as I shuffled to the edge of the bed and stood.
"Wh- where are you going?" he asked, voice marginally less harsh as my hand landed on the doorknob. I paused, looking back. His face twisted into a mirage of a million emotions, never settling on one. I couldn't even stare at him for long. My gaze dropped back to the floor.
"I'm going home," I murmured, opening the door.
"W- wait-"
"For what?" I asked, closing my eyes. I suddenly felt exhausted again. I was so tired once more. "I've been waiting for so long. I can't wait forever."
Lloyd was silent.
"This- this brief peace was nice," I said, voice shaking and small as I stepped into the threshold of the hallway, away from him. "It was nice to pretend with you. But we have to face the reality, Lloyd. Maybe- maybe we just aren't good for each other-"

"O- of course we are!" Lloyd stressed, catching up and gently grabbing my shoulder. "You're the only person I want to spend the rest of my life with!"
I released a loaded exhale, tired and worn as he brought me into a tight hug in an effort to keep me from leaving. His arms were warm and it unfairly soothed me in a way nobody else ever could. I leant into it against my better judgement.
"I want to spend the rest of my life with you, too," I whispered as my arms dangled loosely. "But I'm so tired, Lloyd. We can't ignore this. We have to talk about it."
"I know," he said quietly, pressing his forehead against my shoulder. "I know. We can talk."
I swallowed tightly.
"I- I don't want to feel like you're forced-"
"If it means I get to keep you with me," he murmured. "I'll do anything."
He wanted to talk.
He wanted to talk.

"O- okay," I said, stuttering in stunned relief. "L- later then. You need to get to school."
A groan pressed from his throat. Lloyd shifted his head and his nose brushed against my neck. He inhaled, long and slow, before releasing his breath in a rush.
"Can I just stay here forever?" Lloyd murmured. He took another sniff and I felt his face scrunch up. "... can I remark you?"
"Hookay," I squeaked, stepping out from his hold. He watched me part with a disgruntled, sad frown. "You need to get to school-"
"But your scent-"
"Can wait, dragon boy," I chimed, voice pitched nervously. I really did not want to get all hot and bothered before we had even talked things through. "You'll be fine. I'll just... wear your hoody."
"It doesn't work like that," Lloyd grumbled. "It's getting harder to control, doll. It's been far too long."
"Noted," I said, pushing him down the hall. "You're going to be late, hurry up! If it really bothers you, you can... mark my wrist or something."
"It doesn't work like that," Lloyd repeated himself as I urged him out of the entrance. "But I'll take it."

I blinked. "It was a joke-"
But he'd already grabbed my wrist and pulled it up to his lips. I stared, bewildered, as he pressed an open-mouthed kiss to the thin, sensitive skin under my palm. My face burnt red. He may find it hard to communicate through words, but Lloyd was really good with communicating his feelings through actions. I'd dare say he's overly affectionate. Clingy, almost, if I didn't think that the word 'clingy' sounded worse than what he actually was. It was a welcomed comfort.
Figures.
"A- are you done?" I stammered, heart racing and blood roaring in my ears as he nuzzled his cheek against my wrist. I'd forgotten just how demanding his weird instincts were.
He officially ruined me for any other relationship. Anybody else would simply be too boring after Lloyd. He better stay true to the whole 'wanting to spend the rest of his life with me.'
"Yeah," he sighed, pulling away after giving a finishing peck to my palm. "Finished."
"Did it help?"
"Not at all," Lloyd answered with a shake of his head. He gently poked my cheek. "But it gave me this pretty sight."
My already red face turned even brighter and my throat turned dry. Was I even breathing? I couldn't tell. My heart skipped a gazillion beats.
I was glad nobody else was around to see my emotional and hormonal crisis. He chuckled leisurely, as if the little bicker before had never even happened. His ease at moving on astounded me.
"See you later," Lloyd said with an amused grin.
"B- bye-" I stuttered before watching him leave with wide eyes, still taken aback and flustered. My gut gave a tug.

So much for not getting all 'hot and bothered.'

🍃🍂🍁🍂🍃

Tuesday, I was allowed to go back to school.

"I've got to see Mrs. Anderson before class," Naomi said as her hand swung with Cole's. I'd hitched a ride with them this morning since Lloyd had uncharacteristically slept in and was still waking up when it was time to leave.
"See ya, Y/n!" Cole said, waving goodbye as he went to accompany Naomi to where she needed to go. I smiled and waved my own goodbye.
My chest felt heavy with the inevitable loom of impending exams and the seniors in school seemed the way I felt. A bunch of us looked exhausted from study. I was one of them.
I started thinking of the things that I'd miss of high school, since its end was drawing near. The laughter in the bustling halls, the fooling around in the cafeteria, the breaking of the old gym locker room. Despite how much it may have stressed me out and how the people rubbed me the wrong way in regards of Lloyd and the rest of the team, I found myself feeling nostalgic.
But something I sorely wouldn't miss walked right up to me.

"Hey-" Claire said before Lloyd swooped in and saved me from what was sure to be a total mood-ruiner for the start of the day.
"Hey, sunshine!" he chirped readily, grabbing my hands in his and pulling me away before Claire could do anything about it. I followed him, relieved and grateful for his quick observation.
"Thank you," I stressed when Claire was out of earshot. Lloyd pulled me into his side. It felt right to be close like this again.
"Anytime," he murmured, pressing his lips against my temple. "How was the drive with Naomi and Cole?"
"It was peaceful until we picked Naomi up," I snickered as we walked down the hallway. "Then she wanted to know everything from over the weekend. So now Cole knows about how you tried to mark my wrist and failed."
Lloyd snorted. "Yippee. I'm coming to yours after school."
I raised a brow, sending him an intrigued look. "You are? What's the occasion?"
"We're going to... discuss... things," Lloyd said, squeezing my hand. "Like we said."
Ah. The discussion. The talk. I would've pursued with it after Lloyd got home from school on Monday, but the ninja were called out to a mission from lunch until late and they all came home exhausted, hence Lloyd's unorthodox sleep in. I let him rest.
"Oh." I nodded, biting my lip and suddenly awkward. "Cool."
Lloyd smiled. It was strained and forced but it was still there.
"Cool," he echoed.
He eyed my neck before tearing his eyes away.

Thankfully, I had a break in art class. Since we'd already finished off our big, end of year assignment, there was nothing to do except to fool around and make paper airplanes. A movie was playing from the projector, but I just took the hour period to nap against Lloyd's side while hugging his arm. It was the best nap I've had in months.
"Y/n!" Chen had yelled, overjoyed when I walked into gym. He swamped me in a smothering hug and I giggled at his affectionate enthusiasm. "Oh, my god, where were you at the after party?! A- a bunch of gang members crashed it and then the ninja arrived and it- it was insane!"
"Oh, uh..." I swallowed, shifting awkwardly. I didn't want to tell Chen that I got shot because it would just turn into a huge deal. "I wasn't feeling well so I went home early."
"Oh," he said, sobering up. "You feeling better now? Is that why you weren't here yesterday?"
I nodded. I mean, it was partly the truth.
"Yep. That's why."
My phone went off before Chen could continue the conversation. I pulled it out of my pocket after saying that I'd just be a minute.

"Lloyd?" I asked after looking at the contact. "What's up?"
"Y- Y/n," he stammered, shaking. He sounded as if he were in pain. My spine stiffened. "I- I need you to come to the old locker room."
What.
"What?" I asked.
"P- please," he choked out and I felt my worry skyrocket.
"Okay," I soothed as I quickly began making my way out of the gym. "I'll be there in a second, alright? Keep talking to me. What's wrong?"
"I f- feel shaky," he said and my brows creased in confusion. "And sweaty. L- like I have a f- fever."
"Do you want me to call your parents?" I offered, swiftly speeding across the old parking lot to the equally old gym. "Are you feeling nauseas?"
A shaky breath. A sniff.
"A little," Lloyd confessed.
"I'm five seconds away," I reassured, entering the old building and slipping into the locker room. The broken pieces of flooring crunched underfoot. I ended the call and glanced around the shattered room before finding Lloyd huddled up in a corner. His head was resting against the wall with his eyes closed in a pained grimace. I shoved my phone into my pocket and hurried over.

"H- hey, su- sunshine," he mumbled weakly. I crouched beside him, feeling his forehead with the back of my hand.
"Hey, greenie," I hummed, brows dipping when I noticed that his forehead was incredibly hot - on the verge of boiling. I hoped it was just his powers playing up. "What's going on, baby? Did you eat something weird?"
He shook his head and swallowed. His red eyes cracked open and the slitted pupils dilated widely when they found me. The black almost consumed the whole iris. That couldn't be good.
"I'm going to call your dad, okay?" I said quietly, running my hand through his hair and pulling out my phone. I went to dial Garm's number (he got a new phone and was very proud of it) when I was suddenly tugged forward. My phone clattered to the floor. I didn't even get to press call.
"H- hey," I said in surprise as Lloyd unfurled so I could land on his lap. My knees touched the ground on either side of his hips. "What- what are you doing-?"

I was cut off by Lloyd thrusting his face into the crook of my neck with a strength that had my entire body jolting. I gasped, catching his shoulders to steady myself as he inhaled deeply. A rumbling, thundering growl from his throat had me pushing his head back with a concerned frown.
"Lloyd!" I said, lightly tapping his cheek. "Snap out of it - what's going on?"
His eyes fluttered open. What used to be red were a menacing, frighteningly beautiful purple. My gaze squinted in confusion.
"Yo- your eyes-"
"I'm sorry," Lloyd rushed, words tumbling. "I'm sorry- I- I think it's- it's telling me - my instincts are- I think it's because I-"
I released a surprised breath, staring at him in shock as I made sense of his broken sentences. His hair was getting sweaty. He looked like he was in agony.
"Is this just because you need to mark me?" I asked, stomach rolling in sick shock. "Why didn't you say anything sooner? You should've told me it made you sick!"
"Y- you said you didn't want me to-" Lloyd gasped, breathless. He clenched his teeth for a brief second. "You wanted t- to wait-"

My heart thumped. He forced himself to wait just because I asked, totally oblivious to what would happen to him? That adorable idiot.
"Hey," I soothed, leaning in closer. His hands tightened against my waist. "Lloyd, it's okay. You can mark me."
His purple eyes found mine in frustrated restraint.
"B- but you said-"
"I know what I said and I'm taking it back," I said, pulling my hair to the side while my other hand stroked his cheek with my thumb. "Please, Lloyd. If it'll make this stop."
"I'm s- sorry," he breathed.
"It's okay."
"I'm so sorry."
"It's okay," I insisted, cradling his face softly. His purple eyes latched onto my neck. "It's not your fault. I'm sorry. I didn't know this would happen."
Lloyd couldn't say anything else. Instead, he busied himself in dragging his cheek against my skin. I dropped my forehead onto his shoulder, giving him more access as my mind raced.
This was awkward. But serious. And what was up with his purple eyes? I thought they only turned red and green - and gold, I guess, back at that one time he used the golden power against the preeminent during the battle in Stiix. Since when could he turn them purple?

Lloyd nosed the crook of my shoulder, pressing delicate kisses that had my breath hitching in pleasure and thighs tightening over his. His hands massaged against my hips - whether it was in an apology or he was doing it without thinking, I wasn't sure. Still, it felt nice to have him this close again. The soothing comfort only he could bring me.
"Sorry," Lloyd whispered again as he pulled away from my neck. I went to reply but simply fell into a blissful sigh when he pressed his lips to mine. I fell into the kiss, soaked into him while his hands wrapped tight around my waist and pulled me closer still. My nerves were crying in desire, one-tracked brain singing Lloyd's praises that were swallowed by his mouth on mine. It was okay, this was okay. This was so he wouldn't die or anything, to soothe his pain.
Did I think that doing something this heated was a bad idea because of our absolute lack of communication? Yes. Was I going to stop it? No, Lloyd needed this. And in a way, I needed it, too.

Then I made the mistake of opening my mouth to breathe.

A primal instinct in the back of Lloyd's head was flicked. I felt it in the way his grip strengthened in tenfold, heard it in the way his fanged mouth snarled my name, tasted it in the way he pushed his tongue through my parted lips.
Stunned, I stilled for a second, before deciding that we'd gone this far - what was a little more sinning? I let Lloyd taste me in a way that had my heart racing a million beats a second, skin trembling in excitement, toes curling against the floor. The piercing traced my tongue and my eyelids fluttered in a strange, adoring sense of nirvana in response.
His hips rolled up and a burst of pleasure I'd never felt the likes of before had my breath choking in my throat.
Okay now this was very new. But I couldn't comprehend it, my brain was blank, there was nothing but the tingling sensation, the absolute ecstasy, oh fuck, the bliss of it.
His hands pulled me closer and everything was hot and sweaty and I couldn't think. I couldn't think.

I may have moaned against his shoulder when he rolled his hips for a second and then a third time. He groaned something shuddering when his lips dropped down to my throat, pressing opened mouth kisses, biting, nipping, sending my head into a spiral of emotion and staggering hormones. My hands crawled up to his hair and combed through, finding purchase and tugging. His resulting purr was broken and choking and I lurched with a particularly strong thrust that sent my visceral being soaring and scrambling against him.
This wasn't real. It couldn't be real, it felt too good. I couldn't even remember my own name - everything was only Lloyd, Lloyd, Lloyd.
"S- say my name again," he whispered before sinking his teeth into my neck and rocking against me, sending another stroke of bliss throughout my body. His name slipped through my lips in a shaken moan.
Heat pooled and twisted and boiled in my lower body. Lloyd was my lifeline, I clung to him as if he were the only thing keeping me alive. He may as well have been. Letting go would be a death wish against myself. I never wanted to let go.

"Do you know how fucking hard it was for you to be close to me and for me to not mark you in front of everyone?" Lloyd hissed.
"Do you know how h- hard it was for me to not t-talk to you?" I stammered, voice breathy and spent as I focused on not deceasing from his electric, addictive touch. He breathed a laugh against the cooling wetness of my neck and the brushing of the chill had me chomping my teeth down onto my lip.
"Got me there," Lloyd admitted breathlessly, nosing my neck and making me lift my head aside. I eagerly did.
"A- are you feeling better?" I asked.
"So much better," he sighed, nipping at my neck. "But I d- I don't know. There's something... just a little longer?"
"Please," I whined at his suggestion. He chuckled, latching onto my skin at my sweet spot and adding to the number of love bites. It was hot - too hot, and suddenly it felt like my clothes were suffocating me. I sighed his name in a shaking keen, grinded against him and he stiffened. Stilled. With a monumental and exciting groan-

He bit me.
But his fangs were longer than I expected and my eyes shot open at the feeling of his teeth snapping against my shoulder.
"Lloyd-" I breathed.
Were his fangs growing longer inside of my skin? A sharp slice of pain had me recoiling and pushing away. Gone was the bliss, gone was the ecstasy. My shoulder was on fire.
"Lloyd!" I cried, shoving him back. His hazy, purple eyes found mine and I stared at him in shock as red dripped from his extended fangs. That was my blood. My eyes stung in pain.
The haze in Lloyd's eyes snapped back into focus when he noticed the blood on my shoulder and the taste of it on his tongue. Panic consumed him so fast that it gave me whiplash and suddenly he was ripping off part of his shirt to stop the bleeding.

"Shit," Lloyd cursed, voice shaking as he began to freak out. His frantic eyes, red in fear, jumped between my stunned face at the slowly soaking shirt. "Y- Y/n, I'm so- I'm so sorry, I-"
I winced as he tightened the material into a knot around my arm and shoulder. Lloyd cursed again and grabbed my phone.
"Zane, I need you here," Lloyd said, voice beginning to break as he slipped out from under me and paced the room. I landed on my knees, silent in shock. "I- I hurt Y/n- just hurry! Please!"
I stared at the wall, brain blank for a different reason. Lloyd returned and I shifted my gaze to him, confused and perplexed. What was going on?
"I'm so sorry," Lloyd said, voice catching in his throat as he crouched before me. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have called you- fuck, why did I do that? God, doll, I'm so sorry-"
"I- Lloyd-" I began, voice small. My shoulder spiked in pain and I grimaced, eyes watering.
"No, nononono don't cry," he soothed, bringing me forward into his arms as he held me close. He held a hand over my shoulder and kept it chilled. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Why do I keep hurting you?"
The door to the locker room slammed open and Naomi burst into view, followed by Zane.

"Jesus Christ!" Naomi yelled, stopping in her tracks as I silently sobbed and Lloyd sniffled. We truly were a pathetic sight. "What the hell happened?"
"I bit her," Lloyd said hollowly, tears running down his cheeks. Naomi's face went red with rage.
"You FUCKING BIT HER?!" she yelled, only being held back by Zane's hold. "What the FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!"
"I didn't meant to!" Lloyd cried. I watched the scene blankly. My head was numb. What was the day again?
"You didn't meant to bite her?!" Naomi snapped. "I cannot believe you!"
"I'm sorry!" Lloyd stressed, face panicking as he turned to the ice ninja. "Zane, can you help her?"
Zane, having surveyed the scene with a blank, calculating face, stepped forward and crouched. He untied the cloth with a careful, sure hand and revealed the injury.

"Oh, my god," Naomi said, voice wavering. I didn't want to look at the mess.
"It is just puncture wounds," Zane announced calmly. "They are deep but clean. It will not need stitches."
Lloyd choked a cry, dropping his forehead onto my head. I turned to him, found his sorrowful face and frowned.
"D- don't cry," I whispered, swiping away his tears with my palm. He stared before shaking his head in sobbing disbelief.
"I do- I don't understand you," he confessed in a short wail.
"Don't cry," I repeated, cradling his cheek with one hand. Naomi massaged her temples while Zane stepped back. I glanced up at the two.

"Excuse me," the nindroid said as he pulled off his shirt. I blinked, surprised, before he opened up a large, cleverly-hidden panel on his stomach that revealed his metallic endoskeleton, gears and wires. And a handy first-aid kit.
I would've laughed in shock at the situation if I didn't feel like crumbling.
While being tended to, Naomi called my mum to tell her that I'd be coming home early from school. I only allowed myself to look when a large, white bandage was placed over my shoulder. Lloyd had taken to silently watching, as far away from me as he could be in the small room. He looked so guilty.
It hadn't set in yet.
"Okay, Y/n," Naomi murmured as she helped me stand. I think I was still very heavily in shock. "Let's get you home."
"Wait, I- I need to apologise-"
"I think you've done enough," Naomi snapped at Lloyd. He flinched but didn't argue, falling silent again.
I went home.

I stared at the ceiling of my room. Zane was outside, somewhere.
It had started to storm.

The ceiling wasn't enough. A sense of unfairness made a crash of rage flood through me and I found myself climbing the ladder to the roof of my house in blind fury. More thunder crashed and more rain was sent smashing into my side. I didn't care that Zane could hear my outraged shriek at the dark sky. It was so close - peace was just within my grasp. Lloyd was going to come over and we were finally going to talk.
Now he wasn't replying to my messages again.
"IS THIS WHAT I GET FOR HURTING LLOYD?!" I screamed at the sky as a million negative emotions made my body tremble. My cries were loud and carried on the wind. The clouds replied in nothing but a growling rumble. "IS THIS KARMA? I'M SORRY! I'm sorry!"
I fell to my knees in the middle of the storm. My shoulder ached. Everything ached. Why did this have to happen? Why did everything get in my way? Just when I was starting to think that things could be okay again.
"How do I fix this?" I cried against the harsh wind.

But of course, there was no answer.