A/N: Bear with me here, y'all. This might not be the funniest chapter, as I am still getting used to this writing style. Though, I promise, it will improve.

Perfectionkit was awesome. She knew it. It was so very obvious. She was a literal rainbow disco ball. What's not to love? Why be beautiful on the inside when you can be beautiful on the outside and people can see you be beautiful?

She was so awesome that when her eyes had finally opened, they were constantly shifting color. One second they were a shimmering purple, then a soft teal, soon fairy pink, and BlOoD rEd. Sometimes that unnerved her less-awesome Clanmates for some reason. Weirdos.

And do you know what made her even awesomer? She was the deputy's daughter! The daughter of the tom with the world's best butt. Sadly, her butt was normal sized. But if anyone asked, it was more perfect than her dad's. So there.

"Whokit, Careskit! Are you listening? I was telling you about how awesome I am!" she scolded her unwanted littermates, whose boring gray pelts had turned away from her. The horror.

They groaned (In their dull monotone voices, of course). "We don't care."

Perfectionkit shook her head. "No, no. That's what everybody's (Nobody glared at her) supposed to think about you."

Careskit huffed. "Why do you hate us?" she asked flatly, her eyes duller than normal.

"Ur dum"

Unwanted childs: u suck *Dance*

Awesomeness in itself: mom use ur supermom powers and drown da cretins

Perfectionmom: u can eat dem urself deary

Perfectionkit: kk *noms*

Unwanted childs: :sob: sis no

Perfectionkit: :maniacal grin: sIs YeS

Unwanted childs: *death*

Unwanted childs: *Life*

Perfectionkit: >3( no fair

Leaderstar interrupted the session of unwanted child abuse with his leader-like shout of "All cats old enough to be awesome gather beneath Highdiamond for a ThebestClan meeting!"

All 24 kits jetpacked into the clearing, (You know, because logic) but Perfectionkit socked her siblings in the face and knocked them into last week because they would never ever ever ever be awesome. "Hahahahahaha suckerssssss-" She then demanded to be in the front row because the was the awesomest.

Because she was special and awesome, cats parted to let her pass until she was standing on Highdiamond next to Leaderstar. He gave a flattered gasp. "I-I'm honored!" Then he smiled and took a shaky bow. "Honored to be in the presence of your rainbow disco glitter awesomeness! Would you do like to ride on me for the meeting?"

Perfectionkit: Wut took u so long 2 ask? *Jumps on, 'accidentally' digging her claws in when she reaches his eyeballs*

He screamed in agony. Then he stopped and grinned so widely it reached up to the north star. "I can't believe it! The awesomest kit ever just clawed out my retinas!" he exclaimed.

The Clan cheered.

"Yay!"

"Hooray for Perfectionkit!"

"Hooray for Leaderstar's retinas!"

ToTaLlYnOtEvIlClAw scoffed. "What makes her so awesome? I'm obviously better! I'm so awesome that she doesn't even deserve to get close to my retinas!"

The Clan collectively gasped in horror.

Leaderstar eyes were wild with rage. "How. Dare. You. Speak. Of. My. Adopted. Daughter. (Deputybutt and Perfectionmom momentarily murdered him) That. Way."

ToTaLlYnOtEvIlClAw: *MiDdLe FiNgA*

The Clan collectively gasped in horror.

Then remaining part of Leaderstar's eyes boggled.

Then Perfectionkit, feeling like ToTaLlYnOtEvIlClAw sucked vacuums, turned into a disco ball and blinded him. She then exploded him with her awesomeness and backflipped in mid-air. "You've been ✨Perfectionkited✨" Then, still levitating is her disco ball awesomeness, zipped down and booped him on the nose. "Exile, you piece of my siblings-"

Clan: *Gasps in 🔥burnnnnnnn🔥*

ToTaLlYnOtEvIlClAw, trying desperately to keep his 🧠vital organs🧠 in, fled the camp, spouting twoleg profanity all the way.

Brightbright turned to Shibainu, unconcerned, and muttered, "I thought I told him to speak cat! He can't keep talking gibberish!"

Perfectionkit smirked at their not-awesomeness. She knew that he wasn't speaking gibberish. Well, she wasn't supposed to know... But that's not important... She definitely hadn't visited Onlyoneleftpaw's basement and learned about things. Yeah. Definitely not.

Perfectionkit suddenly was aware of every cat's eyes trained on her rainbow disco glittery awesomeness (Basically, everyone was looking at her).

Even with his eyes unable to work properly, (totally not her fault what are you talking about :>) Leaderstar had been able to tell what happened. "You-you-you just exploded his intestines! And levitated!"

"And?"

"You acted like a warrior... An awesome amazing wonderful brilliant powerful warrior!" Leaderstar breathed. "And, I think nobody's gonna care (Nobody middle fingered Leaderstar) if you're five and a half moons too young to be an apprentice! I'll have your ceremony now!"

ThebestClan cheered.

"Hooray!"

"🤬ToTaLlYnOtEvIlClAw!"

"She doesn't have to be six moons old... The warrior code doesn't exist... YAY ANARCHY"

"ilikerainbowsuvu"

"Nu i do"

"Sthu <3"

"ALRIGHT CLAN NO CHIT CHAT WE HAVE THE MOST SPECIAL BESTEST AMAZINGEST AWESOMEST KIT HERE TO BECOME AN APPRENTICE!" Informed Leaderstar, because nobody knew that. He then sealed his fate by saying, "WhO wAnTs HeR?"

He was then crushed by the whole Clan, and the whole Clan was crushed by eachother in a fight to the death over the awesomest rainbow disco glitter kit ever, who grinned maniacally as they had a gladiator match over who would have the honor to teach her things.

After a few hours, the warriors sought out an idea and whispered it to Leaderstar. "Pssspspspspsppssspsppsp" they said. Ew. Gibberish. I'm smort but I can't speak gibberish. And yes that's how you spell smart uvu

Leaderstar regained his spot on Highdiamond, before promptly plummeting to his doom.

ThebestClan: owo

ThebestClan: *Totally silence*

ThebestClan: *Totally silence*

ThebestClan: *Totally silence*

Leaderstar: *Life*

Deputybutt: aw dorn it my butt deserved to be leader

ThebestClan: owo

ThebestClan: B O M B A S T I C S I D E E Y E

Leaderstar: *Spank*

Deputybutt: You. Just. Spanked. The. World's. Best. Butt. *MiDdLe FiNgA*

Leaderstar: ye

Perfectionkit: AHEM

Leaderstar: sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry don't kill me with your awesomeness *crawls into a hole*

Perfectionkit sighed. Her Clan sucked. They weren't nearly as awesome as her. (Not that she'd want competition, of course. Awesomeness comes in a small package.)

Leaderstar, regaining a hint of dignity, managed to climb Highdiamond without butchering himself. "Perfectionkit, please step forward." She did, smirking at her stupid dull boring littermates, who had somehow returned from last week. "You have reached the age of *coff* six *coff* moons *coff*"

The Clan burst out laughing, and Perfectionkit silenced them with a look. Who gives a my siblings if I'm old enough? B O M B A S T I C   S I D E   E Y E.

"Anyway, until you receive you warrior name—which will undoubtedly be as awesome as you—you shall be known as Perfectionpaw. Your mentor will be every warrior, deputy, and leader in the Clan because everyone loves you so yay."