UNEDITED

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[6 months ago]

his vision was blurry, and he didn't know why.

he was driving a car, too fast. a part of him knew that he should stop – that this was dangerous. but he didn't listen to his subconscious. nor to the screams of the girl next to him.

"natsu, slow down!" exclaimed lisanna, who was beyond terrified.

the pink-haired man slurred his words, "don't worry, baby. nothing'll happen."

he pressed on the gas pedal harder; just to prove a point.

"stop! you'll kill us both!" at this point, lisanna was screaming at the top of her lungs.

then it happened.

a truck appeared out of nowhere, blowing the horn as soon as the driver noticed the car ahead. but the mass of the vehicle prevented it from having an abrupt stop, and natsu was too drunk to suddenly hit the emergency break.

it was too late.

they collided.             

the last thing he heard was the sound of her screams, and then a ringing in his ears. before passing out, he looked at the passenger seat to see blood trickling down his lover's forehead.

then he blacked out.

the pink-haired man's eyes shot open.

every once in a while, natsu found himself waking up in the middle of the night, with ragged breaths and and a sad feeling in the pit of his stomach.

it happens to be one of those nights. he can't get any sleep – the nightmares wont leave him alone. all natsu wants is a decent amount of rest, but since that life-scarring event over two years ago, nothing could stop the nightmares.

he wakes up with sweat on his forehead, heavy breaths and lucy in his arms.

but he isn't sad. his heart just aches and tears stroll down his cheeks, but he isn't sad.

he's guilty.

natsu wishes he could turn back time, and change his mistake.

change that one bad decision.

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lucy always feels the sadness radiating off him, but can never get him to tell her why he is hurting so much.

although she spilled all her misfortunes to him a long time ago – speaking about how her father never cared for her, and how her mother died of cancer when she was only eight – he still wouldn't tell her.

a part of her feels like she's the only one who truly tries to love in their relationship, and he couldn't seem to reciprocate her feelings.

lucy isn't sure about this anymore. how can a relationship work when there is no trust? the two of them are already dysfunctional as it is. all she wishes is that natsu would tell her what he's feeling, so she could at least try to share his pain.

that's what you do in a relationship; you carry the other's burdens.

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"i want to spend the rest of my life with you, luce."

she stares at natsu as he gets on one knee, a bright smile on his face. he rarely ever smiles, lucy notes. but his occasional smile is what she lives for.

a wide grin crawls up her lips, as she gasps. it is just how she imagined it; at the park, having a picnic, where they went on their first date.

"will you marry me?" he says, showcasing a beautiful ring.

all of her doubts suddenly go away somehow.

how could she say no?

the blonde's eyes sparkle, as she gives him a tight hug.

"of course!" she exclaims. she's so damn happy.

but they're natsu and lucy, and they can never be happy for too long. still lucy hoped, natsu lied, and at the end, they were both sorry.

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some chapters are short, others are longer. really depends.

POSTED: Friday, 2nd September, 2016