[Lol, forgot to update yesterday. yEET :)

Music in the MM is WILD by Troye Sivan.

Also, looks like I'll be going as Ellie for Halloween. More yEET.]

Stay Creepy, My Friends!~

Chapter 37

Reese's POV

"Sorry if these are too baggy. I lost the drawstring to them a long time ago," I told Ben as I handed him a pair of sweatpants to wear. He stood in front of me, hugging my sweatpants and a t-shirt I lent to him against his chest.

"It's alright. Not the least of my worries," he replied.

I took a few moments to gaze at him, before I went for my bedroom door and said, "I'll let you change." Quietly, I closed the door and shuffled down the hallway to the kitchen.

Hunter sat at the kitchen table, looking at his phone, while Mom was making some tea. I pulled up a chair next to my brother and asked, "The news say anything?"

"Yeah," he answered. "The freeway and that grocery store are gonna go under some serious construction. I'll have to take another route to get to work now."

"Oh shit..."

"Reese," Mom chided without looking back.

"Sorry," I murmured.

"How's Ben?" Hunter asked.

"He's alright for now. I let him borrow some clothes," I said.

Hunter set his phone down and rubbed his hands against his face. It's been a long night for us. Mom is worried beyond her wits, but she's keeping to herself since she doesn't want to go into a lecture while Ben is here and scare him. And knowing he will have to leave again after this, the night only feels worse.

"I'm sorry," I said, twiddling my thumbs on the table.

Hunter rested his head in one hand and responded, "Why are you apologizing?"

I paused for a moment to think about his question. Shrugging, I said, "I don't know. I just feel bad."

"It's okay. We didn't know anything would happen. We're safe and that's what matters," he said assuredly.

"Yeah..."

"Are you okay?" he asked.

I nodded reluctantly. "Just surprised, is all. This night was supposed to be fun for the three of us, but..."

My brother sighed and kindly shook my wrist. "Hey, I realized I was kind of a dick for bailing on you."

"Hunter," Mom chided again, tossing a look over her shoulder.

"Sorry, mamá," he murmured. He looked at me and continued, "So I was a jerk. I apologize for that. But I also wanted you and Ben to hang out, and you did, so there's a plus."

"Yeah, there was," I said, staring down at my hands, thinking about my time at the concert and having enjoyed the experience with Ben at my side. There were moments where I just wanted nothing but to be with him, and sometimes it felt like we were the only ones there. Just him and I jumping around like fools, howling at the top of our lungs, cackling like no tomorrow. He really brought up my mood earlier, and I'm thankful for that. In all honesty, I probably wouldn't have enjoyed the concert itself without him.

"Reese," Mom spoke up, "would you like some tea?"

"No thanks, mamá," I declined.

She nodded and finished prepping the cups she had. Afterwards, she gave one to Hunter, then said, "I have some for Ben too."

"I'll give it to him," I said immediately, standing up. She smiled and handed me his cup with a napkin.

"Make sure he eats something," Hunter said before blowing the steam away from his tea.

"Sure thing," I said, already walking down the hallway. When I got to my bedroom, I knocked on my door and waited for Ben's reply. Softly, he said, "Come in," and I turned the doorknob.

Inside, Ben sat on my bed with one of my pillows in his arms. I shut the door with my foot and told him, "My mom made you tea."

"That's sweet of her," he said, flashing a small smile. I carefully handed him his cup and he blew on it to cool it down.

As I sat at my desk, I took a look at the clothes I gave to him. They were definitely a little baggy, but he looked comfortable, and that's all I wanted. I'm sure he won't give them back, so I picked something I wouldn't miss, and something he wouldn't mind keeping. As for me, I hadn't changed out of my clothes from the concert, but I barely wanted to have Ben out of my sight. He was in such a pleasant mood earlier, but now he's rattled, anxious, and exhausted. I hate seeing him this way. He shouldn't have to be.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" I inquired hesitantly.

Ben finally took a sip of his tea, then clutched the cup tightly in his hands. "I don't want to talk about it."

Although I was bothered, I just nodded and shut my mouth.

After a few minutes of sitting in complete silence, I remarked, "You should eat something. What do you want?"

"I'm not hungry.."

"You have to eat."

Ben shook his head and kept his eyes on his cup of tea. "Reese...you know I can't stay here for long."

"I...I know," I mumbled.

"I wish I could spend the night, I really do. Unfortunately, I have to go back home soon and report what happened. I should've done so already."

"Mhmm..."

Another moment of pure silence. This time I could feel Ben's gaze on me. He asked, "What's wrong?"

I shook my head. "It's not a big deal."

"Reese, tell me."

Defeated, I sat up in my chair and scooted it towards the blonde wraith. "I don't want you to go."

"I have to..."

"When will I see you again?"

He pursed his lips apologetically. "I don't know."

"You have to give me something," I said.

He furrowed his brow and answered, "I'm not sure if I can yet. I don't know what'll happen."

I clutched onto the edge of my bed and added, "Ben, give me something. I need to know when I can see you again."

"I can't know right now for sure," he groaned.

"Please, stay for this one night," I pleaded. "You need to rest. I know you won't when you go home."

"I'll be fine," he insisted.

"Just stay, Ben. Please. Rest up."

"I'm plenty rested. I need to go," Ben stated.

Scanning his face, I argued, "You're completely exhausted. Your skin is pale, your eyes are dull, and you're still shaky. Stay here. I need you to stay here."

"Reese.."

"First thing in the morning, you can leave. I'll give you whatever you need until then, alright? Plenty of water; I'll make you food. You can take my bed and I'll sleep in the living room, or something. It's no big deal. I just need you rested and--."

"I. Can't. Stay," he repeated more desperately, strengthening his gaze. Taken aback by his tone, I stopped talking and shrunk away. His fervent expression fell away to make way for sadness, and he set his tea down at my desk. He adjusted his spot so he sat right across from me and gently cupped my face in his hands. They were so warm from the tea, yet I felt the restraint in his fingers, like he was afraid I'd fall apart at his touch. His blue eyes analyzed my face with guilt gleaming in them, and I wanted to know what was wrong, what had happened.

Almost in a whisper, he said, "I can't put you in danger. No matter what, my job should never affect you in any other way than to protect you."

Frowning, I replied, "Don't tell me you're planning on staying away forever again."

He stifled a chuckle and shook his head. I sighed quietly out of relief. His thumb rubbed against my cheek as he explained, "No, no, I think I'm too close to you to bring myself to leave for good. I'm just saying that I have to do my job to keep you safe. You have to let me go tonight so I can do that."

"But--."

"Reese," he halted me firmly. Again, I didn't push my words further and listened to him attentively. He went on, "As much as I enjoy being with you, being with me has its consequences. I'm warning you that you might be in danger at one point or another. In order to prevent that, I need you to have faith in me. Let me do what I need to do to protect you. You trust me, don't you?"

"Yes," I answered without hesitation.

He smiled. "Good. That's great. Now...do you understand that I need to leave?"

I nodded, but muttered, "I don't like it though..."

"You're so picky," he teased, pinching my chin. I moved my head away from him but he caught me anyway and pulled my face against his chest. Tenderly, he hugged me close and I uttered a soft groan. A delighted chuckle left him and I felt it in his chest, along with his beating heart. My solicitous emotions seemed to calm down just by being in his hold.

Carefully, I wrapped my arms around his waist and gripped the back of his shirt. Although I sounded like a child, I murmured, "Please don't go..."

Ben started to run his fingers through my hair and said, "I have to. To keep you safe. I'll do anything to ensure your happiness, you know that, right?"

"I know..."

"Then don't worry. Everything will be okay."

"I want you here," I grumbled. "Like this. Right here."

"Reese..."

"You can keep me safe if you're right beside me, getting rest," I claimed.

"I already said..."

"Just for tonight. For one night. That's all I'm asking. That and nothing more. I'll take care of you and everything--."

"Do you have faith in me or not?" he asked, forcing my head up so I could look at him. His assertive stare worked its magic and my argument disappeared once again. Dropping my gaze, I mumbled, "Yes. Absolutely."

He swiped my hair back before leaning away, and I reluctantly let go of him. Then, against my expectation, he scooted backwards on the bed and patted the space in front of him, beckoning me. I listened and sat beside him, waiting for him to say something. Playing with the folds of my blanket, he took a deep breath and began, "This seems out of nowhere, but for a long time I had never had anything that made me legitimately happy."

I furrowed my brow. "What do you mean..?"

"For a few years, I relied on outlets to deal with my frustrations or give me a false sense of content. Video games, fixing or dismantling gadgets. A big contender was, well, weed. I can recall a time when my days were spent just...smoking. Day and night, over and over and over again. This was after I had lost someone dear to me, a girl who was the world to me. I did so many horrible things to myself and to others out of just...spite for everything. I was a fucking mess, Reese."

He took a moment to pause, either because he was thinking of his next words or the memory of such a depressing time got to him. Either way, he got back on track and continued, "Weed is a beneficial remedy, if used right. I'm pretty sure I abused that shit. Used it to drown away my thoughts, because that's what it does best. Used it to numb me out, because that's the specialty of it. At times, it's handy to take away stress, but too much of it just... It's not good... By the way, don't do drugs."

"Thanks, I know," I joked. The wraith laughed warmly, squeezing my knee.

"Anyway," he said, "weed used to be my getaway when times got tough. The past couple of years, I cut back, and only smoke when I really feel like crap. I'm getting better. If you met me before, I don't think we'd ever be able to hold a decent conversation."

"It'd be interesting to try though," I remarked.

"And let you make fun of me for days to come, I don't think so, hun."

"You've done worse."

"True," he muttered. "We're off topic! What I'm trying to get at here with my weed tale is... I still get stressed out, and frustrated, and kinda depressed, and I'm not always as goofy as I come off as, but I've found something better than weed to make me happy."

I cocked an eyebrow and smiled. "Is it...me?"

Melodramatically, he crossed his arms and turned his head away from me. "Go on and steal my thunder, why don't you."

"No, please finish," I pleaded.

"Are you going to let me tell my own story?"

"Yes. Go ahead."

He narrowed his eyes at me, uncertain, but then he quickly flashed a smile and said, "Okay, yeah, it's you."

"Amazing," I marveled with fake awe.

The both of us shared a laugh together, and I could feel the tension from earlier slowly disappear. Once we calmed down, Ben said in a gentle tone, "In all seriousness, I can confidently say that I've found my happiness in you. Even when you're not around, just thinking about you gets me onto the right track. You make me feel...human. When I'm with you, the world doesn't feel so cruel and dangerous as it actually is. And when reality kicks in, I want to fight the negativity alongside with you. You make it easy to envision a happier life, and to become a better person. Weed could never do that. None of my outlets could. You're special to me, Reese, and I don't know what I'd do if I ever lost you. I..."

Ben pursed his lips, contemplating hard while he stared at his lap. With an audible gulp, he cleared his throat and said, "I need to protect you at all costs. I must. Okay?"

I nodded in understanding. He smiled softly and squeezed my knee again. "That's all I wanted to say. Again, it was a random story, but I felt like telling you."

"I appreciate it. I know that kinda stuff can't be easy to confess. Thank you."

He nudged me with his elbow and chimed, "Thank you for...existing."

A giddy grin cracked my lips and I ended up pulling Ben into a hug. He yelped out of surprise, but cuddled up to me a split second later. The wraith leaned on my chest and I had to recline against my headboard, holding him close. This time, I began petting his hair, running my fingers through his golden locks. It felt calming to have him here next to me. I wanted him to stay like this, but he has to leave, and I can't go against his wishes. I'd be a complete ass if I did.

"Hey," he started, sitting up straight. "In case I don't see you soon...you can go ahead and...mess with my ears. My...real ears."

Smirking, I remarked, "You're serious?"

"For now, yes, unless I change my mind," he muttered.

Mischievously, I sat up and snaked my hand behind his neck. My fingers latched onto the chip at his nape and I removed it with ease. Immediately, his appearance changed and he was his regular self. His red and black eyes stared at me, expectant, while my fingers played with the quarter-sized chip. I took a few moments to get a good look at him, knowing it would be a while until we met in person again. When I was ready, I abruptly lunged forward and hooked his head under my arm. He let out a funny squeal and fell onto my lap, flailing his feet. Feebly, he smacked a pillow against my face, but I was already pulling on his elfin ears.
It didn't take long for me to see the blush on his cheeks, and I chuckled at the scrunched up expression on his face. Like always, his ears began to twitch and wiggle like a cat's, or something. The sight entertains me way too much, but I can't help but enjoy it. Especially when Ben gets flustered and tries to fight me. He's the one that offered.

"Thanks," I said.

"Mmmmgg!" he groaned in response.

A few seconds later, a question came to mind and I asked, "Why does this bother you?"

He quit making that scrunched-up face and answered, "It doesn't bother me. It just feels funny. Like getting grabbed at a ticklish spot."

"So it bothers you."

"N-No."

I chuckled. "Does anyone else do this?"

He shook his head timidly. "No. A girl I used to know did. She thought they were cute."

"And how'd you feel about that?"

He avoided eye contact with me as he replied at a quiet volume, "I liked it. I was in love with her, so I let her do whatever. She was obsessed, hehe..."

My fingers slowed and tugged on his ears more gently. I realized the girl he loved was the one he lost, but didn't want to say anything in fear that I'd upset him. Being curious though, I wondered what she was like. She must have been pretty cool if Ben loved her so much.

"Well," I started, "I'm kinda glad no one else picks on your ears. If they did, then there'd be no satisfaction for me when you get all whiny."

"I'm not whiny," he said, whining.

I rolled my eyes and continued flicking and tugging on his ears. The way they wiggled always gets to me and makes me laugh.

"Then, I'm the only one who gets to do this?" I went on.

His expression changed as he took a moment to think. Pouting his lips, he mumbled, "Yes. Only you."

"Nice," I deadpanned, suddenly pulling on his ears really hard. The blonde wraith yelped and grumbled meekly, trying to hide his face again but I didn't let him.

"Still only me?" I questioned impishly.

"O-Only you," he stuttered.

A grin helplessly met my lips and I leaned my head back to utter a spirited chuckle. Something about the way he gets is so amusing to me, and a little...

When I looked down at him, my eyes were caught on Ben's mouth, and the way he kept biting his bottom lip. It was an unconscious fidget, but it made me stop for a second. And, for some reason, the thought of biting his ears came to mind, and it was all that I could think. Something about the idea wasn't just for the sake of being mischievous though. I just want to do it so I can see Ben's reaction. I want to see that flustered face. Because it's cute. It's really, really cute. He's...really, really cute.

My heart started beating fast, and maybe a little too loud. Ben never reacted though; he just lounged on me like a cat, but a very coy one. He didn't seem to mind when I shifted in my spot to sit up right. While he was so preoccupied with being embarrassed--and doing that clueless, little lip bite--I leaned down towards his ear to open my mouth and finally fulfill what I wanted. Just a quick nip and that's it. That's all I want. He won't mind. He offered his ears to me. I'll be gentle.

"Reese," he spoke up softly, interrupting me just as my mouth was an inch from his ear. Quickly, I reeled away and tried to hide the sheepish look on my face. With an apologetic mien, he sighed and said, "I have to go. The longer I stay, the harder it'll be for me to leave."

"Ahh...o-okay," I stammered. "Uh...you haven't finished your tea though..."

"Sorry about that. Finish it for me?"

I nodded without really thinking.

He lifted himself onto his knees while his hands were planted at either side of me. All it took was one long, thoughtful stare into my eyes to make my heart go crazy again. His irises were so vibrant despite his exhausted and demure state. The way he gazed at me was sweet, full of care and worry. The corner of his mouth quirked in a meek smirk, and he said, "I'll text and call you, keep tabs on you and your family. Tell me everything you need to. I want you safe and sound."

"Of course. Maybe I'll even tell you what I dream about, hehe."

"Hope you don't get nightmares then. I wanna hear good things, with clouds, and unicorns...or dogs. Dogs are better."

I thought to say, what if I get a...not PG dream, but I kept that to myself. Too awkward, Reese. Tone it down.

"I'll tell you about all the magical dog adventures in my dreams," I jested.

"Perfect," he said, then chuckled. It sounds so light and reminds me of his singing. Now I want to hear him sing me a song again, like he did at that karaoke bar.

My buoyant awkwardness was faltered when Ben got off of the bed and stood up. He began putting his shoes on, almost reluctantly. It felt awful knowing he doesn't want to leave, but he has to. I hung my legs off the edge of my bed and sat beside Ben as he tied his shoelaces. My eyes traveled over his slim figure. Again, my clothes are slightly baggy on him, making him look thinner than he is, but he's fit. Definitely fit. I had an urge to grab his waist and just...hold him, and feel him in my arms, and keep him here, and never let go. But he could probably do some judo shit on me to get out, if he really needed to (though I doubt he'd even think about hurting me). I kinda want him to though. Just to feel how strong he is. That's weird...but I want that. Not now though. Maybe another time.

There goes my heart again. Dammit. It sounds too loud in my ears. There's no way Ben doesn't hear it. God, I feel it rattling my chest.

My thoughts went racing right back to the temptation to bite his ears. Too flustered to think straight, I leaned close to Ben and grabbed his arm to anchor him. The confusion was clear on his face but my lips were on his cute, pointy, elf ear before he figured anything out. He flinched, but didn't seem to want to move away from me at all. I felt myself shaking as I slowly clamped my teeth on his skin. Ben babbled incoherent mumbles, and his hand gripped my thigh as some sort of support. He was shaking too.

"R-Reese," he finally managed to sputter out, "wh...what are you...?"

My only response was to bite harder. He groaned and tried to pull away, but I held him still. Ever so sneakily, I licked his ear and my face grew hot. I realized what I was doing--knew what I was doing all along--but did nothing to stop myself. Even Ben didn't seem to want to move away until I would bite his ears really hard. My grip remained firm, and gradually the more he leaned away, I would go with him. There came a point where I bit too hard, and Ben whined aloud.

"Don't do that," he muttered, clamping his fingers on a sensitive spot at my knee. I groaned and ended up biting harder to get back at him. The blonde wraith whimpered and slapped my leg repeatedly with some resistance behind his palm, tentative to hurt me. Despite how cruel I was with his ear, all he did was whine and utter feeble groans. He had to bite his lip just to keep his noises down. I was equal parts for and against that. I want to hear him.

Finally, I realized how badly I was treating his ear and stopped biting. Somehow, I thought licking would make up for the pain, and I did that. Ben sighed cutely, and I received a wave of accomplishment that probably shouldn't be as important as it felt. Quietly, I whispered to him, "I just wanted to let you know...that you're definitely best boy."

Faster than I could register, Ben turned on me and gripped me by the nape of my neck. He pulled me close and our foreheads touched. Something about his tone seemed angry as he muttered, "Why are you like this?"

I gulped and replied, "S-Sorry."

"Don't be," he said. His lips were dangerously close to mine; I could feel his breath on my skin. Deep down I wanted to close the gap, but there was still hesitance that held me back. This urge was made worse when Ben ran his fingers through my hair and said, "I'm your one and only, got that?"

"Yes.."

"Say it."

Suddenly overwhelmed, I stumbled over my words, "Y-You're my one and only best boy."

The way he chuckled and brushed my hair sent tingles down my spine. He's so close. Please close the gap. Do it for me. Go first. My body won't move. It's been too long since I've ever even...

Unfortunately, Ben just nuzzled his nose against mine before pulling away slowly and letting go. I leaned forward to try and catch him, but he was already off the bed as soon as I reached my hand out. He stood in front of me, smiling and in a much better mood. He cupped the ear I bit and remarked, "You better not have left a mark, peanut butter cup."

"W-Well...I hope I did," I retorted like a goofball.

A blush colored his cheeks as he grinned wider. With a sigh, he pocketed his phone in his sweatpants and said, "I'll see you soon. Take care of yourself, okay?"

The moment I stood up, he backed away urgently and added, "Good night, Reese."

As soon as I reached for him again, his figure was obscured by a flash of white light and pixels. I closed my eyes to shield them, and when I opened them I was alone. My room felt far too empty and was far too silent now. For a second, I was upset, but I calmed down and sluggishly fell onto my bed. Staring up at my ceiling with the faded glow-in-the-dark stars, I recounted what just happened, what I thought, what I did, and what I felt doing what I did and thought. My heart started racing again, beating hard, and I gulped.

On the desk, my phone buzzed, and I practically lunged for it. I received a message--a few, actually--from Ben.

-Sorry I left in such a hurry. That was probably dickish of me. Just understand that if I let you get close and touch me again...
-I shouldn't say.
-Know that it would be something..."dumb".
-Really "dumb".
- ('ཀ'○ )

That emoticon lightened up my mood and I stifled a laugh. As soon as I tapped on the screen to text, I was tempted to say, what if I wanted something "dumb"?, but I immediately scrapped it. Instead, I just said:

-It's okay. Remember to take care of yourself too.

A few seconds later, he replied:

-I'll keep myself in good shape for you, my peanut butter cup!~  ᕙ('♡' )ᕗ

Fuckin' hell, a heart for a mouth...that's cute. Fuck.

I run my hand through my hair and cover my face, frazzled by just these messages alone. My heart is still beating fast, and I clutch my shirt, hoping it would stop. A fluttery sensation remained in my stomach too, and thoughts of Ben didn't make it better, but he was all that crossed my mind. I wonder, did he feel like this just now? Did he want to close that gap as badly as I wanted to? Or did he not close it on purpose, to tease me for teasing him? God, I feel drunk--but not the bad kind where you end up getting plastered out of your wits and have regrets. There's not an ounce of regret in me. There's only an ecstatic heart and confused thoughts. Especially when I think about Ben and everything about him.

His vibrant, entrancing eyes, no matter if they're red or blue; his mouth and the way he smiles, and the voice that comes out; his hands, and the way he likes to touch my hair, and how soft his skin is in general; his ears, definitely, and how sensitive he gets about them is amusing. I like seeing him blush, and whine, and laugh, and pout, and tease, and beam with all the joy in the world. He's so cute. So god damn cute.

I want my heart to stop beating so violently. I want my stomach to stop flipping so much. I want to stop the heat stuck in my face. I want my mind to stop racing with all of these thoughts, good and bad. Because when I get like this, I can't stop. When I get like this, I want more.

"What are you doing to me," I groaned into my hands, on the verge of frustration.

Fuck...

...

The next day started off mellow. Mom and Hunter were a little perplexed when I told them Ben left early in the morning when they were both asleep. Either way, they believed me.

Mom invited Artem over for lunch. I didn't mind it, but I wasn't in the mood to eat so I ended up lounging in the living room, playing video games. In the kitchen, Mom, Artem, and Hunter were talking about stuff, like the mess that happened last night, how we were doing, and more. They brought up Ben a few times, and when they did my gaming performance would drastically go down.

"I heard he was a bit of a troublemaker," Artem commented. Instantly, I turned my head and shot him a look. He had the same idea and stared me down too.

"Ben? He's a sweetheart," Mom defended. "Un hombre encantador."

"Well, that's what Reese told me," the Russian brunet replied.

Focusing on my game again, I interjected, "That was a long time ago. I barely knew him then. Our...uh, friendship is much better now."

"Really? I'd like to meet him sometime soon then," he said. Again, I shot him a look and he narrowed his gaze at me too.

"Maybe we can all have a little dinner at some point. And maybe you can bring that Val girl too, Hunter," Mom chimed in that 'innocent mom' tone that's hard to be mad at.

Hunter laughed nervously and replied, "Uh, I don't know about that."

"Who's this Val?" Artem questioned.

"She's, uh, a friend from college," my brother explained. "We met up at the concert last night with two of my other pals too."

Artem took a sip of his water and started, "Is she...?"

Immediately, Hunter protested, "N-No, no, no, she's--."

Just to be an asshole, I quipped, "She's totally into him."

"Reese," Hunter hissed at me and I smirked mischievously, still gaming. I don't know much about Val since I've seen her only a few times, but I knew enough to tell that she liked Hunter. Hunter never talks about that though, and I know he's not as clueless as he lets on.

"Do you like her?" Mom asked him.

Hunter hesitated and answered, "I mean, she's cute, but... I don't know."

"You already like someone else?" Artem questioned.

"N-No," Hunter replied awkwardly. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him lean back in his chair and scratch his head. What a dork.

He added, "Yeah, I could like her, but...I want to focus on other stuff. Stuff that's more important. I don't have time for--."

"A relationship? Mijito, of course, you do," Mom encouraged. "You're twenty-one. If you think you have enough time later in life to date, you're wrong. Trust me, I would know. Life is awful like that in that you will never have enough time for anything as you grow older."

"Your mother is right," Artem agreed. "Things get in the way. Responsibilities pile up."

"Exactly! So whatever it is that you want to do but think you don't have time for, make them happen...!"

"Mom...," Hunter groaned.

"You can be embarrassed all you want, but you know I'm right," she said. "Maybe it doesn't have to be Val, but enjoy a relationship while you can! Be young! Live life! Agarra por los huevos--!"

"MAMÁ," Hunter and I exclaimed.

"Qué?! Don't be so sensitive!"

"Mom, Artem is here," Hunter griped.

"I don't know what's going on," he deadpanned.

"Look, mijo," Mom continued, "just go on and enjoy your youth. Before you know it, it'll be gone. I want you to be happy, and you've got to believe in yourself and wish to be happy too. Take your chances."

"Don't be selfless," Artem added.

"Yes! Thank you, Artem! Hunter, don't be selfless. Don't be scared to try. Don't you want to be in love?"

"Y-Yeah," Hunter murmured.

"Then stop hiding behind what you think you should do or feel, and achieve what your heart wants! Be the charming, confident, and brave man I know you are and take charge of your life!" And then all of us were startled when Mom smacked her hands on the table in her zealous rant.

I paused my game to look at them all in the kitchen and it was amazing: Hunter looked scared, Mom was beaming with empowerment, and Artem was gazing at her with the kind of awe you'd get from looking at a goddess. Suddenly, my tenacious mother rounded her attention on me and said, "This goes for you too! You'll be out of high school soon and will have to deal with these kinds of things! I want what's best for you, and whatever makes you happy is what's best! I'll support you one-hundred percent! Understand?"

"Yes, mamá," I answered quickly.

"Good! So both of you, be good men and be happy men. Now, who wants desert?"

Hunter and I hesitated, but Artem gladly lifted his hand with an amused smile on his face.

Minutes later, we all enjoyed some tres leches cake (chocolate this time, hell yes), and Hunter and Artem had a discussion about engineering. While they chatted, I stayed silent at my seat, staring at my plate and thinking about what Mom said. It can't be a coincidence that she gave that rant after what happened last night with Ben. Achieve what your heart wants, she said. Well, I don't really know what it wants.

Actually, that's a lie. As much as it messes me up, I want it to beat wildly again like it did yesterday. I want it to pulse along with my joy when I think about or when I'm with Ben. It's always kind of done that, but last night sort of made things...clearer. And I may not know what my heart wants...but I think it knows what it wants and is just not telling me.

I guess I should thank Mom for her inspiring words. Hunter already has. But I won't do it yet. Not until I really know what the hell I'm doing with these feelings. They sure know what they're doing with me--fucking me up, that's for sure.

What the hell am I gonna do?

...

Elizabeth's POV

I woke up with aching limbs and panicky breath. My vision was blurry for a few seconds, and I gradually started making out my surroundings as it cleared. There was warm dirt under my fingers as I felt around. Nearby, crickets chirped a high pitched song. My hair was a tangled mess and clung to my neck and shoulders, sheen with sweat. My head was swimming and my body trembled as I sat up.

A twig snapped to my left and I instinctively summoned a spike from the ground towards whatever was there. But I didn't have to worry because it was only Caedis. He was unfazed by the black spike inches away from decapitating his head. I sighed and dismissed the spike, relieved that I wouldn't have to fight in my state.

After coming to my full senses and surveying night-shaded the area, I figured out that I was meters from the cabin. I didn't make it inside, for some reason. How long have I been out here?

Now that I think about it...why am I out here? What happened? All I remember is going out to get more groceries and...now I'm here.

"Zalgo...now would be a good time to show up," I grumbled.

There was a few moments of silence before the former Lord of Chaos appeared leaning against a tree nearby.

You actually called for me this time. That's new.

"What happened to me?" I asked.

Your memory is leaving you, dear. Getting old already?

"I'm serious," I groaned as I stood to my feet. For a moment, I wobbled and almost fell over, but Caedis quickly came forward and propped me upright. I held onto him just in case.

Zalgo tapped his chin as he hummed in thought.

You really don't remember?

"No," I growled, already annoyed. He laughed as if I told a hilarious joke.

I had a feeling this would happen.

"What would happen? Stop being cryptic and tell me...!"

The demented man pushed off the tree and sauntered towards me, as calm as can be.

To give it to you short, you paid your Benjamin friend a visit and threatened to kill his boyfriend.

"What...? Where??"

Not at the mansion. You just found him and, well...it wasn't a lovely reunion.

"Did I kill anyone?"

No one else besides a lowly thug trying to mug some poor girl. But you did do something equally consequential.

"What?" I was beginning to panic again.

He grinned, exhibiting a devilish yet genuinely excited nature.

You declared war on the Proxy and her companions.

I gaped at him. "No. That's not true."

Wait until she comes for you. I'm sure the girl you claim to be a spineless brat will show you otherwise.

"That... No..! Why would I do that?! I don't remember doing that!" I exclaimed.

My, you should've seen it. You were a spectacle. So merciless against the man who was once your friend! Completely mad with power.

"Why can't I remember...!" I hissed under my breath, on the verge of crying tears of frustration.

Perhaps the mouths have had enough of you holding them back? Who knows.

"The mouths...," I murmured. Nervously, I glanced down at the tattoos that were visible. They were pitch black and unmoving, and none of them spoke to me. Still, I could feel their presence deep within me. There's no way they could have taken control...could they? Why would they? I've been feeding them plenty, haven't I? I've been sating them!

Wipe the petrified look off your face, darling. You should get some rest. And a shower, as well. A wet mutt would feel sorry for you about now.

Too caught up in my anxious thoughts to get mad at his insult, I ordered Caedis to take me to the cabin. Zalgo vanished from my sight and left me alone during the short trek. Caedis and I ended up passing by the grave for that innocent boy I killed, and my heart sank. How many people could I have killed in my unconscious state? How far will I go the next time? I can't let there be a next time. I need to get ahold of myself and take charge of these damned mouths. I need to stay strong.

But as I continued walking with Caedis to the cabin, the mouths snickered in my head and lightly irritated my skin, as if to spite me, as if to say, good luck with that.

I'm gonna need it...