[Ey, sorry about the disorganized update schedule. Y'know, school and all, hahaaa.

Someone put me out of my misery--I meAN, UH.

Song in MM is Troye Sivan- for him. (because Troye and his music are pure arT).

Enjoy the chapter!]

Stay Creepy, My Friends!~

Chapter 39

Reese's POV

It's been a week and a half since I last saw Ben. Things have been okay on my side; I take my medicine as usual, no relapses, no fights, I'm doing my homework like I should. I've been adding a little more pep throughout the days by texting Ben, and sometimes getting replies. When I do receive a text back, I'm always happy. Even if it's just a "lol", I'm glad. It means that Ben is feeling alright enough to respond. But when he doesn't? I only hope he's thinking of good things and taking care of himself.

It seems like I'm not the only one feeling somewhat down lately. For the past week or so, Angel has been quieter and more reserved. She walls herself up with the books she brings to read. I would think she's engrossed with her stories, but I caught her holding a book upside down once, and I began to question if she's even reading them anymore. I can tell it's not because she wants to avoid me. She looks out of it. Artem is even growing concerned for her. Mostly because she's an employee and having her around to file paperwork and take calls is actually really beneficial. We can't lose her. But I know it would suck if she ever left because I see her as a pretty cool friend.

A Friday night. As soon as my shift ended, I came up to Angel, who was putting her stuff away in a backpack of hers. She looked at me and managed a small smile. "Hey, Reese."

"Hey, Ang," I greeted. "Uh, I wanted to ask if you wanted to get some froyos with me?"

"What's the occasion?" she joked lightly.

"Just because," I said with a casual shrug. "C'mon. I'll pay.."

She chuckled. "You know how to speak to a woman's soul, kid."

I smirked. "You up for it then?"

Her gaze crossed over to the clock on the desk, which showed 8:37pm. The dark haired girl sighed and responded, "I don't see why not. It's been a while since I've had froyos."

"Sweet. I know a great place. Let's go."

As soon as Angel had her stuff together, we walked out of the office. Artem was closing up the garages and spotted us on our way out. Looking quizzical, he asked, "You two are carpooling?"

"Out to get froyos," I answered. "Want one?"

"Frono thank you. I'm tired and wish to go home," he said. Angel snickered and I tried not to cringe from his deadpan-ass pun.

"G'night, ruski," I called out as Angel and I walked to the Chevelle. We got into the front seats and I brought the engine to life with the turn of my keys in the ignition. As I backed out of the parking space, I took a glimpse at Angel. Her gaze was towards the window, staring off with that faraway look on her face. Ever so subtlety, she ran her right thumb over the wedding band on her left thumb. I didn't have to think much to guess what could've been on her mind.

The ride to the frozen yogurt shop was only about 8 minutes away, but it felt weird without talking to Angel, and I was unsure if I should tell her anything. So instead I turned on the radio to a station that played soft rock and that seemed to ease the tension. Finally, we arrived at the shop and I parked the Chevelle up to the front, already eager for a froyo. Angel and I exited the car and she left her stuff inside, on her seat. With her hands in her jacket pockets, she followed me inside the shop and we were welcomed with a lighthearted ding from a bell above.

"Welcome to Froyo Schmoyo!" a girl at the counter greeted with an upbeat tone despite the evening.

"Schmoyo?" Angel whispered to me.

"It's catchy," I japed.

The shop played some catchy future bass tunes that made the colorful place seem livelier than it really was. There was only one other couple in the shop, sitting in the corner, chatting to each other sweetly. Maybe I can bring Ben here next time he comes. I bet he'd go for multiple servings of froyo and drain the machines. I'd definitely join in.

Angel and I grabbed cups and I went straight for what I wanted: chocolate and coconut. Angel, on the other hand, stood awkwardly, staring at all of the different flavors, like mango, blueberry, strawberry, cherry, cookies & cream, cheesecake, taro. I couldn't exactly blame her; it was a lot.

Eventually, she picked strawberry and the taro, but she freaked out when the machine wouldn't stop immediately upon letting go of the lever. When she came up to me, her cup was nearly overflowing with frozen yogurt and she had a sheepish grin on her face. I couldn't help but laugh.

After we got toppings and I paid, we took a seat at a table to enjoy our dessert. But that wasn't all I came here to do.

"Can I ask you something?" I started.

In the middle of eating her chocolate-chip-and-sprinkles-covered strawberry-taro monstrosity of a spoonful, she nodded.

"Are you feeling okay?"

She chewed on her plastic spoon for a moment, then answered, "Yeah. You bought me froyo. I'm good."

"That's not what I meant," I said, chuckling lightly. She cocked an eyebrow and I went on, "You've been out of it lately. Is there something wrong?"

The dark haired girl set down her spoon and managed a smile. "I haven't been getting much sleep is all."

"Usually there's something wrong when you do that," I quipped.

Angel scratched her neck, looking off to the side away from me. I took a bite of my coconut frozen yogurt and then said, "Is it the job? Are you wanting to leave?"

"Huh? No. Well... I don't know. I actually managed to land it so I wouldn't want to let it go so easily," she replied.

"Your fiancé?" I inquired, remembering how she caressed the wedding band.

She glanced down at the rings and shook her head. "Nothing's wrong there. I still miss him though..."

"Then what has you down?"

"Lack of sleep, Reese. That's all."

I stared at her for a few seconds longer before looking down at my froyo and eating some more. We sat in silence for a couple of minutes (technically, not really, but the future bass wasn't really helping us) and ate up. Angel took her time with hers, which made me feel a little self-conscious about scarfing my whole cup down even though I really wanted to.

Having had enough of the silence, I spoke up, "I'm only asking because I'm concerned for you, and I kinda consider you my friend. I don't want to come off as nosy."

"You're not nosy," she assured me. "But I'm not sure what to tell you."

"If it is lack of sleep, I can give you remedies. There's always NyQuil, too, hehe...," I murmured.

"Thanks but no thanks," she replied with a smile. "Don't worry too much about me. I have these sort of moments. I'll get back on my feet."

"Alright, well...if you ever need help, feel free to come to me. I'm not the best, but I'm something."

"Sure," she giggled.

Again, another pause of silence between us, but it didn't feel as awkward as the last one. Still, I had hoped we'd have some sort of conversation. I can still feel that Angel's kind of...off... She's got that dazed look on her face again. I brought us to this froyo shop because froyos always perk people up (from what I gathered). Something's definitely up if Angie isn't perked up by these damn delicious froyos.

"Reese," she began quietly, almost in a whisper. I had already stuck a spoonful of yogurt in my mouth and simply nodded at her. She smushed her spoon into her frozen dessert as she continued, "...what would you do if...if you ever felt that you'd...lose yourself?"

I pursed my lips and thought, mostly about her rather grim question than my actual answer to it. Regardless, I gave it to her and responded, "It depends...in what way am I losing myself?"

"Well...your ambitions, your thoughts, your sense of duty, your spirit--all of that would slowly start to go away or turn into something...foul. What would you do then?"

"You mean...if I become mental?"

"Something like that, I guess..."

Leaning my head in my hand, I said, "To be honest, I've already been through that."

She shot her one-eyed gaze to me instantly. "You have...?"

"Yeah, kinda. I take medicine for anxiety and depression right now," I admitted. "As well as for PTSD. There were times when I'd go into my relapses feeling so enraged. Just blinding rage, and that was it. When I would get into fights, I'd feel numb to the rational part of me until it was too late. Thankfully, it was Artem who taught me some self-control, but before that I was a mess.

"Along with that, there were times where I felt overwhelming sadness...I-I guess. But I couldn't cry. I'd just feel like not talking, like staring off into space, like sleeping for a long time... When these feelings happen, I feel like I'll never get out of them. I feel stuck and lost for a while. Every time, I worried if I would finally just stop fighting and give in, become crazy, become some...nightmarish kid, you know? Thankfully, I never did, and my family especially never let me. If this is what you mean by losing yourself, then I suppose I could say I know what it feels like, so I know how to handle it."

She smiled and said, "That could be it too, but..."

"But what?"

Her jaw clenched briefly just before she murmured, "I meant, what if you just...can't feel anything? That's what I mean by losing yourself. You feel nothing. You don't feel...human."

"Oh..." I wasn't sure how to comprehend that entirely, or how to answer it quick enough. I can understand the concept of her feeling completely numb, but this seems...deeper than that. That's the layer that I can't comprehend. I asked her, "Ang, did something happen to make you feel like this?"

She abruptly stopped poking her spoon into her frozen yogurt and stared down at the table with an unreadable expression. It seemed like she was daydreaming on the spot, or having some flashback. Just when I was about to snap her out of it, she closed her eye and muttered, "Reese, don't feel bad, but I'm actually really anxious about being here."

I furrowed my brow, recognizing that she changed the subject, but I didn't go into that. "What do you mean?"

"Being here, out here, in public. It's practically just the two of us, but I'm still anxious."

"Why?"

She opened her eye and quickly took a bite of her dessert. When she finished the spoonful, she said, "There's...someone looking for me."

My shoulders tensed ever so slightly, knowing that a sentence like that never means anything good. Keeping my composure, I asked, "Who?"

There was a moment of hesitance that left me briefly unanswered. When the dark haired girl finally collected her thoughts, she said, "I can't tell you the name. You don't need to know it."

"Is this person bad?"

"Bad for me."

"Angel," I spoke lowly, wary of the other people in the shop. Leaning closer, I asked, "Is this a drug thing?"

Her blue eye widened. "What? No."

"Listen, as much as I think you're a rad girl, I don't want to get caught up in some shit--."

"It's not drugs, Reese," she interjected, chuckling a little. That didn't take away my concern.

"Alright, I'll put it this way," she began, noticing my unease. She flattened her hands on the table, saying quietly, "I...used to have a...stalker."

"A stalker..?"

"Yeah."

A little unexpected. "Wh...When...?"

"Not too long ago," she said. "A year or so."

"Is that another reason why you moved?" I questioned.

"Uh...yes."

Again, my concern kicked in. "What about your fiancé?"

"He's safe," she said matter-of-factly. "He's not a concern for my stalker. Um...she only wanted me."

"She?"

"Y-Yes. She. And...I wouldn't doubt she'd try to find me again," she muttered, her mien becoming slightly annoyed.

"How bad was she?"

Angel ate some more of her frozen yogurt, as she thought on my question. With a bit of a frown, she elaborated, "She's a determined girl. Very head-strong, confident, and intelligent. Whenever I created ways to push her away, she got through them. I recall during my time with my...foster father, I ran away from home because she scared me, because no one believed me, believed she was crazy. She found me in the next town over, in some motel I hid in, acting all concerned. One time she tried to get close with my foster dad, to get to me. It almost worked. She's extremely manipulative, disguising herself as a goody-two-shoes, as some saint, but she isn't.

"She's obsessed with me, Reese. I don't know what I did to make her feel so attached, but she's been at this for a while now. And...I haven't been feeling safe, I guess. I get this feeling like someone is watching me sometimes, but that might just be me. That's why I've been a bit...quiet. I'm trying to figure out if this feeling is real, and I'm anxious--so anxious I feel nauseated."

"Why don't you call authorities on her??"

"I've tried," she grumbled. "But she's too good at manipulation. She has all her lies and alibis. Anyone can become putty in her hands, but not me! Not me..."

Angel's eye seemed to flare with energy that I haven't seen in a while. Her hands were clenched on the table, so tight that her knuckles turned white. I gulped and murmured, "Alright, well...I believe you."

Her fervent gaze softened to one of relief. "Y...You do...?"

"Yeah. I...I know what it's like to not have anyone believe you," I admitted. "My dad was a bit of a manipulator too, as much of a dumbass as he was. And I also had a girlfriend in the past who was manipulated and didn't trust my word, despite all I did for her. So I feel you. You shouldn't have to go through that."

She smiled. "Thanks..."

"It's nothing. Basic human rights, and whatnot."

She sighed and brought her hands back to her froyo cup. "It's nice to have a friend that can understand."

"Of course. You need friends, or else loneliness will eat you up inside," I stated.

The dark haired girl nodded thoughtfully. "It's been eating away at me for a while now."

I smirked and stifled a chuckle. "Why don't we not be lonely together, huh? And eat it away with frozen yogurt."

She laughed and her face brightened up. "Sounds great, kid."

Both of us began eating our froyos again, Angel's more melted than mine but she didn't mind. For a moment, I stopped and looked her in the eye. "If you don't mind me asking, can you give me a description of your stalker? That way I know to look out for her."

She smiled timidly and said, "Oh, Reese, you don't have to do that..."

"You don't have to deal with her all by yourself, Ang," I comforted her. "If I can ease your stress then I'll gladly do anything I can. I've got your back."

She brushed a hand through her hair and sighed again. "Okay, fine. She, uh...she's got brown hair, up to her shoulders. Wears glasses. Just a bit shorter than me. And...if you're able to, focus on her skin."

"Why her skin?"

"She's got tattoos. White tattoos. You wouldn't be able to miss them."

"White tattoos," I muttered. "Noted."

"Hopefully neither of us see her around here," the dark haired girl said.

"Same here."

Angel adjusted her own glasses and added, "Enough talking about this stuff. Let's enjoy the froyos."

I smiled at her. "Sure thing, Ang."

As we sat together in placid silence, I couldn't help but think about her comment about feeling inhuman. How bad must she feel to say something like that? Does this stalker distress her this much? Angie is such a cool chick and she's got enough on her plate as it is. I hope I can lessen the burden somehow, like the friend she deserves. She shouldn't have to feel alone or inhuman. No one should. I'll do all I can to make sure she's okay, so she can see her fiancé again without worry. God knows how much they miss each other.

Maybe I know a bit of that feeling too.

...

Friday nights are usually one of the best nights of the week. I always look forward to them. Except this time it's never felt so...boring. Hunter is out working at the bar again and Mom is sitting in the kitchen doing paperwork. I was in one of those moods where I have ideas to do something but don't want to do them at the same time. I thought about gaming, about watching gaming videos, about chatting with Mom, about messaging Artem to bug him, and other things to busy myself, but none of them felt appealing. All my thoughts kept coming back to Ben and how he was doing.

Is he busy right now? He's usually free during nights because that's when he'll text and call me. I also want to see him. He says he's doing fine, but I know he'd only say that so I wouldn't worry. I want to see him. So I decided to try and video chat with him.

While the call was loading, Mom came up from behind and grabbed my shoulders. I flinched a bit and looked up at her. She sighed and said, "Do you want me to order food? I don't feel like cooking tonight."

"Uh, if you wanna," I responded.

She took one glance at my phone and asked, "You're calling Ben?"

Suddenly feeling embarrassed, I lowered my phone and said, "Yeah, I just, uh...wanted his help on my Stats homework."

"You're great at Stats, mijito."

"Yeah, but I wanna double-check."

She chuckled and patted my head. "Tell him I say hi. I'll be in my room."

"Sure thing. Rest up, mamá...!" I chimed, and watched her walk away. As soon as she disappeared down the hall, my phone made a jaunty melody telling me that the video chat finally opened up. My heart pumped harder from joy and I sat up straight. But the smile on my face was quickly replaced by a close-lipped line and an aggressive blush when I saw Ben leaning over the camera, shirtless.

"My peanut butter cup!" he began. "G-Give me a sec, I need to charge my phone."

"O-Okay," I mumbled, trying my best not to stare at the fair-toned chest that took up the screen.

Once he plugged his phone in, he leaned away and I was able to see his face. I was kinda glad to see that he was in his normal form, with the red and black eyes, and those elfin ears; I can even see a bite mark on his right ear--my bite mark. He gave that signature, cool smile of his and said, "Hey there. This is a first."

For a moment I didn't respond because I was too busy staring at him. It feels like it's been forever since I last saw him. He looks okay, and he looks happy to see me too. And he's very...shirtless. Does he...does he know, or...?

"Wh-What's a first?" I finally stuttered. "A video call? Oh, yeah. I just, ya know, wanted to see you."

He chuckled and the sound made me feel warm inside. "I've been wanting to see you too. In person, but I appreciate this too."

"Haha, y-yeah.." Again, I couldn't help but glance at his chest and stomach over and over. I always knew he was physically fit--he'd have to be to do what he does--but he was, well, really fit. Most notable was his collarbone, and neck, and shoulders, and chest, and waist, and....everything. I wouldn't be surprised if he was a model at some point. He looks like one right now.

...Dammit, I don't think he knows he's shirtless and it's bothering me.

Suddenly, Mom came out from the hallway again, saying, "Reese, have you seen my phone? I can't find it."

Quickly, I put my phone down to hide the shirtless wraith on the screen and said, "Uh, no, I haven't seen it, mamá."

"Hi, Mom!" Ben's voice exclaimed happily.

Mom stopped for a second to find where his voice came from, and then she laughed. "Hi, Benito. How are you?"

"I'm good! How was work?"

"Ugh, busy day. My feet hurt real bad, me están matando..."

"You should have a spa day. I can hook you up!"

Mom raised an eyebrow. "Can you now?"

"Yeah! I know a great place. Mud bath, massage, face masks, foot baths, aromatherapy, mani-pedis!"

"Do you use that spa too?"

"Of course! How else can I look so good? I gotta keep my lady-killer face and bod!~"

Mom laughed, while I sat quietly, feeling uncomfortable. Finally, she found her phone on the kitchen counter and waved it in the air with accomplishment. "Found it! Now I can order something for you to eat, haha."

Just when I thought she was leaving, she came up and leaned over the couch to give me a kiss on the forehead. She gave me a little squeeze and said, "The food will be paid already when it gets here. Goodnight, mi niño lindo."

"Thanks, mamá. Goodnight," I said.

"Buenos nachos, Mom!" Ben chirped from the phone.

"Buenas noches, Benito," she said with a laugh. Then she walked out of the living room and disappeared down the hallway. With a sigh, I picked up the phone and said, "Jesus, that was close..."

"Why'd you hide me?" he asked.

Giving him a deadpan look, I gestured to my torso with emphasis. Confused, he looked down at himself, then gasped and turned as red as a tomato. Frantically, he dove away and exclaimed, "Why didn't you tell me?!"

"I thought you knew! How could you not?"

"Reeeeese!" he whined, running around his room trying to find a shirt to wear. "Dammit, I haven't done laundry yet!!"

While he was busy freaking out, I watched him with amusement. Here and there he threw random clothes across the room, which I examined out of curiosity. From where I was placed, I saw a shelf of games, a tv, some game consoles, and a desk covered with junk and gadgets. His room looks like how I would imagine it. Not that I have, but...the thought comes to mind.

After a few minutes of rummaging through his room, he found a t-shirt with alien spaceships all over it and waved it in the air. "Got something!"

"Hooray," I said.

The blonde wraith sniffed the shirt and remarked, "Wait, why does this smell like spaghetti? I ate spaghetti like three months ago... Wait."

Quickly, he tossed the shirt away and went for something else. I simply face-palmed and waited patiently.

Once again, he came back on screen, this time with a familiar green hoodie in his hands. As soon as he started putting it on, I smiled and felt warmth throughout my face. He must have placed his phone on his bed because he hopped in front of the camera and picked it up again, this time sporting my old green hoodie. I felt happy seeing it on him.

"Okay, now that I'm not shirtless," he said with a nervous chuckle, and I spotted a tinge of pink on his cheeks. "What's up?"

"Nothing much. Hunter's out working, Mom's gone to bed, and I'm here. Have you been alright?"

"Me? Yeah. Busy with...work, hehe."

Even though a part of me knew I shouldn't ask, I questioned him anyway, "Hey, uh...when do you think you'll be free again?"

He pouted his lips a little and looked off to the side, thinking. With a hesitant shrug, he answered, "I honestly don't know yet. I'm working on a project right now and I'm hoping to get it done as soon as possible, but some things are proving difficult. Why do you ask?"

"Oh, um...n-no reason in particular, just...wanted to ask...," I stammered, feeling stupid. Of course he won't know yet, Reese.

He chuckled and smiled at me again, which made me feel even more goofy. "I miss you too, Reese. You know I do."

"Y-Yeah, I know," I murmured, rubbing my neck. I gulped and looked down at my lap, too flustered to look at the screen. "Uh, p-prom is coming up soon. You had wanted to take me."

"I'll make it. Don't worry," Ben assured me.

"You will...?"

"Of course. Anything for you, my peanut butter cup." He winked and for a moment I kinda forgot how to breathe.

"Hahaa..aa, yeah, that's--haha--great, um.."

Ben titled his head and asked, "Are you okay?"

"Never better," I blurted. Reese, you fuckin' idiot.

"Reese?"

I took a moment to breathe and catch my bearings. There was no way I wanted to look away from Ben, but I felt like I'd do something stupid if I kept my gaze on his face. Imagine if he were here in person? How would I act then? Yet having him with me is what I wanted the most. It's all I've been thinking about since he left. Whenever my mind is at rest from school or work, he's there to fill in the blanks. His voice, his face, his everything.

"Ben...," I started quietly. He leaned closer towards the camera, allowing me a better look at his face. His red and black eyes were as entrancing as they've always been, so vibrant and ethereal. He's so pretty...

Nervously, I shook my head and cleared my throat. "Uh, I... Excuse me."

With snappy movement, I got up from the couch and ran to the front door. As I picked up the Chevelle keys from the key hook on the side, I hollered out loud, "Mom, I'm going out to the car! I left my calculator in it! I'll be back!"

As soon as I was out the door, I raced to the elevator, eager to get to the Chevelle. At the lobby, I ran out and said hello to the custodian, who, frankly, I don't think even acknowledged me. It wasn't until I ran outside to get to the Chevelle did I notice I hadn't put my shoes on and was running barefoot this entire time. I winced and muttered 'ow, ow, ow' over and over again as I hurried over concrete and asphalt to the black muscle car to get inside. I never felt so relieved to unlock it and sit in the driver's seat. Now I didn't feel awkward being tucked away in the Chevelle. But when I looked at Ben on my screen again, the nervousness came back anyway.

"Is something going on?" he asked.

Panting slightly, I responded, "No, no, I just wanted to talk with you more...privately."

He stifled a chuckle and said, "Okay. Well, what did you want to talk about...privately?"

"N-Nothing really, I..." I did have something to talk about and it wasn't 'nothing', but for some reason I felt...scared. So scared that I didn't even want to admit to myself what it was I wanted to say. But I've come this far and Ben will worry about me because of how weird I'm behaving.

"Ben, I wanted to tell you something," I began reluctantly. "Ever since I last saw you--by the way, I'm sorry about the ear--ever since then, I've realized that...that..."

The blonde wraith kept his eyes on me, and directly on me. There was a look of concern on his face that irked me. This isn't anything serious. I don't want him to get the wrong idea.

My heart was beating hard in my chest, and the silence in the Chevelle made it sound amplified in my ears. As I held my phone in one hand, I gripped the steering wheel tightly in the other, so tightly that my knuckles went pale. Why can't you say it, Reese? Why is this so hard?

"I wanted to tell you...," I tried again, "that...I...I've been thinking..."

"About?"

I gulped hard and hoped the mic on my phone didn't pick up the sound. "Well, you, mostly. And I realized that I... Maybe I... I..."

C'mon, Reese. Say it.

"I..."

Why can't I say it?

"I...I'm so glad you're a part of my life," I admitted.

Dammit.

Continuing on, I said, "You're like...one of the best things that's happened to me, hehe. And realizing that makes me feel..."

C'mon...!

"Feel so appreciative of you...!"

Fuck.

Ben flashed me a giddy smile and said, "That's really sweet of you to say, Reese."

"It's the truth. You deserve to hear these words everyday," I stated. "You also deserve to know that I..."

Yeah?!

"I can't wait for you to come back."

Reese!

"So that I can take you out..."

On a...???

"To hang like we always do, ya know? Hehe."

I fucking hate you, me.

Ben laughed that sweet, fluttery laugh and nodded coyly. "Sounds wonderful, Reese. I can't wait to come back."

My throat felt tight and my limbs were still thrumming from my nervousness. Seeing his smiling face makes my symptoms worse and I know the only way to relieve myself is to admit to him that I might...I might...

But what if I ruin what we have that way? He's the only best friend I've made in a long time and if I lose him because of these flustering feelings then...what? I don't want to lose him. I don't want to ruin anything. I need him. I need him. 

"I miss you," I murmured, probably a little too sadly.

"I'm here, though," he replied, trying to comfort me.

"I want you right here," I told him. "Next to me, at my side, where I know you'll be okay, where I know I can do whatever you need me to do."

His eyes gleamed with mild sadness, and in that moment I could see the exhaustion he's been hiding from me. With a tired yet kind smile, he said, "I want to be there too."

I spent a few seconds sitting in the silence of the Chevelle, surrounded by darkness beyond the windows. Then, an idea came to mind and I said, "Could you come through? For a little while?"

"I don't know, Reese," Ben murmured, glancing off to the side anxiously, as if something was going to barge into his room to thwart him.

"For a little bit. An hour," I bargained.

"An hour?"

"Thirty minutes?"

"You're shortening the time? Don't you know I wanna be with you for longer?" he jested.

A blush slapped itself onto my face again. "U-Uh, two hours...?"

"If I go, I might not want to go home," he purred.

"Then what do you want me to do?" I whined. That got a laugh out of him--a wonderful, bright laugh.

"If I go, what'll we do?" he questioned.

Scratching my jaw, I answered, "We could chat, I guess? Or play some games, if you want? A-And my mom ordered food, so you can chow down on that with me?"

"Oooo, food. You know how to treat me right, babe," he joked. Babe??? Did I hear that right??? He leaned away from the phone to stretch his arms up above him. For a second, I saw his slim waist as the hoodie was lifted, and I gulped audibly again. I never realized until now that he looks good in my hoodie. He has to be doing that on purpose. He's teasing me. Right? Unless I'm just being weird. No, it has to be him. All him! ...Babe??????

"Alright, well, if I'm gonna come through than you might wanna set your phone aside, or else I'll end up landing on you," he informed me. I mean, I probably wouldn't mind.

Doing as he said, I set my phone on the passenger's seat. On screen, he picked up his phone so that it was facing up. The moment he was about to do something, he turned his head when his attention was stolen by something else going on on his side of the call. "Hold on," he said quickly, before setting his phone down and getting up from the bed.

A few minutes later, after faintly hearing an urgent conversation that I couldn't make out, I saw him come back with a disappointed look on his face. Before I asked, he went ahead and stated, "Reese, I have to go. There's been another Corrupted sighting. Looks to be more than one."

"Oh. Okay." I hoped I didn't sound as displeased as I felt. Damned Corrupted...

"I'm sorry," the elfin wraith said. "I really wanted to come through. Maybe another time?"

"Yeah, another time."

Again, his tired yet kind smile rose up to the surface and I felt awful. He's obviously exhausted. What I wouldn't give to just...steal him. Or better yet, beat the fuck outta those Corrupted for getting in the way and then steal Ben. I'd carry him on my shoulder or just in my arms and bring him to the apartment so we can eat pizza and wrap ourselves in blankets, watching movies together until we fall asleep on the couch side-by-side.

"I'm gonna go now," Ben said. "Have a goodnight. Get some rest."

"You too." Please, don't go.

He chuckled and nodded. There were a few seconds that he spent staring at me with a tranquil twinkle in his eyes, which lured me in. Then, he beamed and gushed, "I miss you, my peanut butter cup."

The blush on my cheeks came back and I embraced it instead of fighting it this time. "I miss you too."

The last thing I saw was his hesitant expression before he ended the video call. My phone even made this descending, sad jingle once I was let go, as if I needed a reminder that the chat was over. I felt my smile drop and suddenly I was aware of how alone I was sitting in the Chevelle. It was dark out too, so I grew unnerved. Quickly, I exited the car, locked it, then hurried back inside the apartment building, prodding the soles of my feet with pebbles again.

In my apartment, I tossed my phone onto the couch and threw myself over the back of it. Everything suddenly felt quiet and empty again. Mom is probably asleep by now. It will be hours until Hunter comes back from work, and he'll knock out in his bed in no time as soon as he does. I'm back where I was before I called Ben. It was going to happen anyway, but I still didn't want it to.

About a couple of minutes later, the doorbell rang and a delivery guy showed up to drop off a medium pizza. Like Mom said, it was already paid, but I decided to give the guy a tip. He went on his way, and I went to the kitchen to enjoy my food by myself. All by myself. Geez, why do I have to be so lonely?

"I really fucking miss you," I mumbled with Ben in mind. "I really do..." My mind kept racing back to the image of him sitting on his bed, wearing my hoodie, smiling at me like he always does, telling me he misses me.

Dammit, why couldn't I tell him what I wanted to tell him? He's not like the other two, he's different. But maybe that's why I'm scared to ask him. He's different. He's worth it. And I don't want to lose that. I don't want to lose that smile, and those eyes, and that image of him in my clothes, or his clothes, or whatever he wears or forgets to wear. I need to keep that. No matter how frustrated I get, all that matters is that he stays with me and he's happy. God, I miss him...

Next time he comes, I'm gonna steal him for good.

...

Elizabeth's POV

After weeks of not visiting, I took the opportunity to return to Zalgo's realm. Upon arriving in the middle of the entrance hall, my eyes were taken aback by the darker tone of the decor compared to the cabin. I forgot how...edgy it is.

Caedis stood at my side, silent and watching. I didn't feel like coming here alone for some reason, and leaving him by himself at the cabin bothered me. It's like leaving a child alone; I can't help but feel uneasy. Plus, I didn't want to have another burial for some poor animal caught in his grasp (granted, he didn't mean to kill that rabbit, but he doesn't know any better).

Zalgo appeared as I sauntered down the grand hall, my footsteps muffled by the deep red carpet that crossed the entire corridor. He stepping in sync with me and gazed tranquilly at the decor that was his work.

Glad to see you've paid a visit. Have you come to plot again?

"I just want to check in on the twins," I said, suddenly annoyed by his random assumption.

Mmmm, and will you provide them another pet again?

"Is there something else you want me to do...?"

It would seem trivial to just 'visit'.

"You said I should drop by, so now I have," I grumbled.

But there's so much you can accomplish within these castle walls, my dear. If you will not live in my abode as I had done, it would be nice if you used it for another equally great purpose.

I glared at him. "You make no fuckin' sense and you're lucky I can't touch you, or else I would've punched you for being so vague."

Was devouring my body and replacing me at the throne not enough?

"No, and it never will be."

We walked on, and I drowned out Zalgo's unimportant chatter on an equally unimportant subject. I finally arrived at the throne room, as pristine and dark-toned and untouched as it was the last time I was here. It's as if this realm is stuck in time until I arrive again.

"Zazel! Sudryl!" I called for them.

Where I expected them to appear in front of me, their voices spoke up from behind at the doors. "Hello, Madame Umber."

I flinched and turned to face them. "Jesus, how the fu..."

"You have brought Caedis with you," Sudryl stated. "Has he caused you distress again?"

"No, he's just... I just brought him along. He's behaved fine," I said. I looked at him out of the corner of my eye, and he responded by returning my gaze. It seems lately that my disdain for him in the past has faded out to casual tolerance. There was a time when I hated having him look at me with those eyes. They're too red, too bright, and reminded me too much of Zalgo's eyes. They were also dead-looking, and devoid of any human feeling despite their human design. Now...it feels like something's happening to him, but it's hard to fully tell.

"Welcome once again," Zazel greeted.

Looking at them, I asked, "I remember giving you a cat to care for. How is it?"

The ethereal, white-eyed servant perked considerably and answered, "Cat? Yes. It's fairing well."

"Its fur has grown back where there was none, and it seems to be eating plenty," Sudryl informed.

"What do you feed it?" I inquired.

"Our knowledge of cats it's not extensive just yet, but we've fed it fish," Zazel said.

"Fish...?"

"And poultry," Sudryl added.

I furrowed my brows. "You mean the actual meat?"

"Yes."

I managed a smirk. "Cats are domesticated. They don't usually eat the raw meat of another animal. They eat kibble."

"K...Kib...ble?" Zazel murmured.

I stifled a wry chuckle. "As long as it's still alive and healthy, I guess everything's fine. Perhaps since it was a stray it won't mind straight up meat."

"Would you like to see it, Madame?" Sudryl asked.

"Sure. Bring it," I ordered.

The twins glanced at each other, sharing some unspoken words, and Zazel went off to retrieve the cat. The white-robed servant's walk bordered on a glide as they left through the doors of the throne room, the robe's hem fluttering behind them across the floor.

Sudryl came up to me, offering their hand and saying, "Madame, take a seat. You look tired."

I didn't say anything, mostly because I did feel tired and didn't want to protest. The red-robed
servant led me over to the throne, a seat with an intricately designed black base, legs and arms, and red hued cushions sat on top and on a tall back, with more intricate designs at the head; all of these designs were highlighted with silver. This is the first time I ever really pay attention to the throne, and just like everything else in this grand castle this royal seat was just as exquisitely and precisely decorated. It felt strange to sit on it despite how cozy the cushions were. I couldn't help but wrap my hands around the ends of the arms, rubbing the tips of my fingers against the cold iron (or whatever metal it was). In front of me, Caedis stood like a soldier off to the left, while Sudryl had descended the few steps to stand opposite of him. Beside me, leaning on the throne, Zalgo smirked with a gaze of admiration. Ugh...

Unsettled, I yanked my hands onto my lap and hunched my back a little. Just as I was about to tell the former Lord of Chaos off, Zazel sauntered back into the room with the cat in their arms. Even from far off I could tell it had recovered from its previous, mangy state. For having never met a cat, the twins took care of it well.

The white-robed servant kneeled at my feet to show me the feline cradled in their arms. I leaned over to examine it closely. The cat stared at me with big, green eyes; the pupils were of a moderate size. I reached to pet its head and it flinched only slightly before allowing my hand. I chuckled softly and praised, "You two did well. It looks better."

"To be honest with you, Madame," Sudryl began, "Zazel has been the one to accompany it the most. The feline does not seem to like me as much."

Strange. The twins are, well, twins after all. I would think the cat wouldn't mind either one.

"Good work, Zazel," I told them.

"Y-Yes, Madame. This animal was a gift from you, so it is only right that I treat it with great care," they replied, their big, white eyes staring down at the hazel-furred pet.

"You shouldn't consider me when you care for it," I said. "Consider the cat's well being, how it would feel. That's much more loving."

"Loving..."

"Yes. Loving," I repeated. I lowered my gaze to the cat again, staring into its observant, keen eyes. Suddenly, I remembered the whole reason why I picked it up from the streets and brought it to the twins in the first place. My placid mien faded to one of concern. Seeing the animal now and seeing Zazel care for it so tenderly, I can't help but feel some guilt. The plan I had regarding them has become a battleground of whether I should go through with it or not. For now I'll let the two continue caring for it, especially Zazel. I'll let them keep the cat while they can until my decision is set...

"Madame Umber," Sudryl started, "may I ask how your plans with the Proxy and her companions are going?"

"Ah, yes...my plans...," I murmured, leaning back.

"We may offer assistance if you would like," Zazel spoke up, backing away to stand next to their sibling.

"No, thanks. I don't wish to have a repeat of last time," I hissed. The servants lowered their heads, understanding full well what I meant.

"Should you need us for anything, we are at your service," Sudryl assured me.

"Uh, yeah..."

Elizabeth, perhaps you should use them for council.

"What the hell am I gonna ask them to do or tell me?" I mumbled to Zalgo.

He tapped his fingers on the throne's head, with a calm, thoughtful expression.

More ways to distract the enemy?

"Enemy...," I whispered. I didn't like how it sounded.

Then, I reminded myself about what had happened recently. It's hard to remember because I wasn't conscious for it, but I had fought Ben, and dangerously close to where I work under a different alias. The day after that night, I had heard about and seen the damage I left behind. There's no way I can lose my conscious again. What will happen if I go berserk and no one is there to stop me, not even myself??

"Zazel, Sudryl," I called for their attention. "Do you know if the mouths have a tendency to take control?"

"The mouths?" Zazel murmured. I slid down the sleeve of my right arm to reveal one of them. They hummed out of recognition and nodded.

"When Lord Zalgo was in power, we never dabbled with him and the mouths," Sudryl admitted.

"You say that as if they're separate entities," I remarked.

"We are not...entirely sure," the other servant commented.

Looking to Zalgo, I asked, "Were the mouths separate from you?"

He shrugged and examined his black nails, which I've recently adopted.

Hard to answer that question. For millennia all I've ever known is being one with them.

"But does that mean there was a time before when you weren't...?"

Again, he shrugged.

The mouths are an elusive subject. Possibly as you go on with them, you will receive the answers you seek.

"How can I do that?"

He bunched up his lips to the side and rolled his eyes a bit.

You persist on fighting them but you also deny yourself a knowledge of them that way.

I frowned. "I don't want to give in. I want to control them, or even be mutual and coexist."

There is no compromise when it comes to these mouths, Elizabeth. They are a strong magic--a cosmic essence. You cannot expect to gain knowledge of such things if you do not dive all in.

"I...I don't want to do that," I hissed.

Just as you wish to 'understand' them, they do not wish to understand you. They are primitive yet intelligent...things. Not of your world yet seemingly never belonging to an outside essence either. There cannot be understanding, Elizabeth.

"But..."

There is no logic to the mouths. Remember, their primary mission is to feast. Becoming best friends with you doesn't come close to being a priority compared to feeding on innocence.

Groaning, I threw my head back and pinched the bridge of my nose. "I don't know what the hell to think anymore. You told me I could control them!"

Perhaps we have different opinions on what control means...

"What? That doesn't... Fucking hell--you said I could! What does it mean to you??"

The former Lord of Chaos was silent, his lips pursed.

Shaking my head, I growled, "I am not giving in...!"

Don't jinx yourself.

"I'm done talking with you now," I muttered, turning away from him. Zazel and Sudryl remained standing, staring at me expectantly. When there was nothing but silence, Sudryl stepped forward and said, "As you were saying, My Lady? Regarding the mouths?"

Even though there was no way they would have a solution, I confessed, "They're taking over my conscience in order to get what they want. I'm afraid that they'll make me do something horrible, and if that happens..."

"The Proxy will find you," Zazel commented. At that statement, I remembered what Zalgo had told me, that I had declared war on Ao. As if I wasn't already egging her on, now she'll want to catch me with much more urgency. She was powerful the last time I met her, and I'd like to say I've become stronger since then, but what if the same could be said of her? Everything could be ruined. She could ruin me. I can't have that. We can't have that.

We?

"We have no remedy for whatever ails you and the mouths, at least none that we can readily provide," Sudryl said. "However, we could offer aid in deterring the Proxy's chase for you."

Scowling, I growled, "What did I say earlier about not helping me?"

"We will not interfere," Sudryl assured me, lowering their head with submission. "We will only offer a word of advice."

"And that is?"

Again, the twins looked at each other, sharing an unspoken exchange, before Zazel came forward and said, "There is a man whom you could speak to. Lord Zalgo had worked with him for his last attempt at taking the human realm, before he was dethroned."

Ah, way to emphasize...

Zalgo held an mildly annoyed expression, still standing next to me.

"Who is this man?" I asked.

"All I can recall is that he is a...a doctor?"

I sat forward in my seat, my interest snagged. "Doctor? Do you mean...Dr. Smiley?"

Oh, him... Ugh...

Turning to the former Lord, I questioned, "You worked with him?"

Of course, though that bastard betrayed my orders. He was meant to bring you to me three years ago, when you had "died" and lost your memory.

"Oh right. But he didn't. He brought me to Toby and Clockwork..."

And hid you from me. I tried to punish him, but he is not of human descent, nor is he bound to your world, therefore it was hard to find him when I needed to. Strangely enough...I never knew what he was...

"Is he an infinite entity?"

Zalgo shook his head, stopped, then shrugged.

Not sure.

With my attention back to the twin servants, I said, "So you two are referring to Dr. Smiley."

"No, I do not think it was him...," Sudryl mumbled, touching their nimble fingers to their chin.

"Wasn't his name funny sounding?" Zazel asked them. "Strange name for a human."

"How did his name sound?" I asked.

Zazel looked up at me with focused, white eyes, and fumbled their words, "M...Ma...Mmaa..."

Matsukochi.

While Zazel was still trying to pronounce the name, I looked at Zalgo and murmured, "Matsukochi? Ao's...dad..?"

Yes. I worked with him. He is one of the directors for SCP, or was, if his position has been dropped after last year's incident at Site 16. A nice man. Very intelligent and calm.

Frowning again, I said, "He betrayed Ao and tricked her into ratting me and the others out."

Technically, that was my plan.

"Regardless of whose plan it was, he was still heavily involved in the raid, and for capturing everyone, and for what happened to Jeff. So why should I work with him?" I hissed.

He may have something you can use. You know, if he's still alive and all.

"He should wish he wasn't," I growled.

Standing up, I announced, "Zazel, Sudryl--find Dr. Matsukochi."

"Ah, that's how you say it," Sudryl awed.

"Find his location and let me do the rest," I commanded.

"We are happy to be of help," the duo said in unison, bowed, and walked away together. When they were gone, I descended the throne steps and stood next to Caedis. Zalgo came with me with his hands behind his back.

You will seek the Doctor's help?

"I'll see what he can do. Regardless if I'll use him, I still want to meet him. To fill him in on how things are going and to let him know his service to you was the biggest mistake he could ever make."

Will you kill him?

For a moment, I contemplated the idea. If he isn't useful to me after all then he shouldn't have to stick around. He'd be a minor donation to the mouths.

"We'll see," I replied lowly. "Come on, Caedis. We're going home."

The white-haired, mute soldier followed me as we walked out of the throne room. Behind me, Zalgo chuckled with macabre amusement, a chuckle which has haunted me for the past year and has seemingly become the call of bad omen. Not for me, but for others.

This will be interesting.