[Yo this is pretty long (wowow long chapter! it's been a while!) and it's all about Ao, babieeeeee.

Sorry to all the, uh, non-Ao enthusiasts, but she is my baby too so it's gonna happen. I've gotten a lot of criticism for continuing the other couples' stories rather than focusing on 'Ren', and I do take some fault in that the summary for this book doesn't mention everyone else in the slightest, buuuuut I do state it is part of a larger series. Again, not everyone's cup of tea, but I appreciate all kinds of tea regardless.

And just a heads up, next chapter will have Ben and Reese. Don't worry, you starving beasts.

A big thanks for keeping up with me along these long gaps between updates while I work on my Bachelors' degree and my job. Life is a weird ride, guys. But it makes for GREAT material hAhHA.

Also don't forget to wash your hands and stay hygienic, and don't TRAVEL OUT OF YOUR COUNTRY DAMMIT. I'm sick and tired of seeing COVID-19 news everywhere but it doesn't hurt to respect sanitary guidelines. Stay safe guys. And stay creepy blah blah bleeeeeh :p ]

Chapter 54

Ao's POV

It was pretty quiet in the mansion. The pets were sleeping (except for Ladon who was gnawing on a broken tree trunk outside). Masky and Hoodie were out on errands. Sally kept to her bedroom and played. Ben was out with that boy, Reese. And Jack was, well, in his bedroom asleep. Alone. As has been for the past few days ever since our argument out in the woods. Since then, I haven't wanted to face him and kept to myself in Slender's old study, researching. We haven't spoken since that day either. It's been pretty rough...

The only person I've really conversed with is Ms. P. She's always checking up on me and making sure I eat and drink properly. She's also been a great help with my research. And with all her help, I was able to finish faster than anticipated.

Tsuga canadensis. Eastern Hemlock. That was the species of the pine needle bunch I found in Jeff's room after he was taken away by Elizabeth. That type of evergreen tree can grow just about anywhere, but from what Ms. P could sense from it, the bunch dropped from a very healthy tree. Conditions would have to be just perfect for this meticulous plant—not too hot, not too cold. And it grows very well near the Canadian border and in states close by. So that means upper east states, like Minnesota, Indiana...and Illinois, where Elizabeth was born and raised. And when I looked into old records of her parents', I found they used to have a cabin in a closed off forest resort, which reviews said "are teeming with beautiful hemlock". I don't know Elizabeth all too well as much as the others do, but I can guess maybe she'd return back to her roots, a place of some familiarity—a cabin to call home.

It was time to find her and Jeff, and hopefully at least have a talk with them.

Jack had gone outside and I took this chance to get some clothes from the room. As I was dressing, there was a knock on the door. At first, I thought it was Jack returning, and answered reluctantly, "Come in."

Ms. P was the one who opened the door with a soft smile on her face. "Almost ready, dear?"

I nodded as I finally zipped up my windbreaker. As I grabbed my backpack, I noticed a peculiar look in her red eyes. "What's wrong?" I asked her.

Ms. P pursed her lips, then sighed and answered, "You're still not speaking with Jack?"

I couldn't help but frown a bit. "No, not right now."

"Won't you tell him where you're going?"

"No."

"Ao, love, perhaps he should know."

Adjusting the straps of my backpack, I replied firmly, "I'm not going to tell him. This mission was my idea and my idea alone, therefore it's my responsibility."

"I understand you two are not on the best of terms, but you can't just go by yourself," she rebutted with concern. "Not only is it dangerous to go alone in the first place, but you are searching for Elizabeth, who happens to be a very, very dangerous charge. You need someone by your side."

"And that will not be Jack," I said. "I'm fine to do this on my own."

"But, Ao—."

"I understand your concern, but please allow me this task to take," I said. "I've grown too impatient with everyone in regards to finding Ellie, and I'm disappointed in myself the most. This is my duty as the Proxy to finally complete all the bullshit once and for all. I need to prove myself again as a leader to you all, because right now I know I'm the wreck of the household."

Ms. P shook her head and came up to me. "Ao, don't say that. You don't have to prove anything. What Jack told you in the woods was out of his concern and a bit insulting, yes, but you're still a valiant Proxy...! Of course, you'll stress and panic—the fate of the realm is on your shoulders. I've seen it time and time again what that kind of burden does to people. It's normal and shouldn't be frowned upon, so don't shame yourself for it."

She squeezed my shoulder tenderly with a comforting twinkle in her eyes. As much as I wanted to relent and allow her kind approach to comfort me, I couldn't take it easy on myself. Instead of embracing her, I gently pushed her hand off of my shoulder and said, "I can't be lenient on myself, not anymore, not after all the ridiculous crap that's happened."

As I slipped past Ms. P and left the room, she called out, "Please don't go alone, Ao!"

Just as I rounded the corner, a plume of black smoke appeared in front of me and Ms. P was there to cut me off. She furrowed her brow and said sternly, "I know how strongly you feel about all this, but as a friend and confidant, I cannot allow you to go by yourself. I care about you too much to stay idly by and see you off like this. I'm coming with you."

My eyes widened. "N-No, wait, you shouldn't."

"I will," she proclaimed.

"No, I mean, you don't look, um...human, really."

She froze for a moment before huffing and muttering, "I suppose that's a fair observation, but no matter!"

Although I didn't agree with it, seeing how affirmative she got for my well-being made me change my mind. "Fine, I won't go alone."

Ms. P smiled so wide I thought her black lipstick would overtake her pale cheeks. "Fantastic! Now, for safety's sake, I recommend a third party to come along. Perhaps Jack—."

"Erm, I don't know about that," I interjected.

She crossed her arms over her chest. "I know relationships can be tricky, but you have to relent your anger at some point."

"Jack went behind my back hiding Jeff's disappearance and doesn't even want to go find him," I started. "And if he does, his plan wouldn't coincide with mine. I'm not letting even my boyfriend's judgement skew my time-sensitive priorities. He's not coming."

Ms. P could only sigh and she placed her hands at her waist. "Well, who do you choose then? I opted for Jack due to his extraordinary senses. You'll need someone who can track within the kind of forest you're going to."

"I can track."

"You can track coming to and from the mansion. Its field of magic is sensitive to you now, so of course it can be easy to get around, but it isn't true tracking."

"I'll call Ben."

"You're going to a remote location with few electronic operations. He won't be able to work with much. Let's just ask for Jack's aid."

"I don't want him a part of this mission," I stated, still keeping my ground.

"Then what say you? Masky and Hoodie are out. Sally can't go on missions. Smile is a wonderful dog but was never trained to track at all. The only one left would be..."

The both of us went a bit wide eyed at the realization of who the only person left to pick was, and we simultaneously cringed. Now I don't know what's worse...

We met Kagekao at the study.

"A mission you say," he said with his usual slithering tone.

I nodded. "You perceive senses differently than any of us. With your help, it should be relatively achievable with quick time."

Kagekao's mask smiled a bit and chimed, "My first escapade, tanoshi-sō."

"Will you come along?" Ms. P asked.

He shrugged. "Well, I have grown a bit bored ever since coming here, and you know how I hate being bored. I am interested."

"Fantastic, let's get going," I said.

"However..."

Of course it wouldn't be so simple.

Kagekao pulled a smirk as he ran his fingers against the edge of Slender's mahogany desk and leaned on it. He pointed at me and hissed, "I have not received my apology for your outburst against me."

"Absolutely not."

"Ao," Ms. P muttered and nudged me slightly.

This time I couldn't go with it. "First of all, you were out of line that day. Calling all of us incompetent, especially me, was uncalled for. Had you not spouted such ugly words I wouldn't have lashed out."

"My, what a strange apology that sounds an awful lot like you're blaming me," he purred. He then proceeded to shove the papers I had on the desk aside and lay on top of it. I clenched my fists but didn't scold him for it. Yet.

"I don't think I need to apologize for your insults towards me," I said.

"Then you'd be greatly mistaken to ask for my company," he replied carelessly.

I grit my teeth and huffed. What an asshole of a demon. Kusogaki .

I turned to Ms. P and muttered, "I refuse to apologize. You were there, you know how rude he was that day."

She sighed. "Yes, but you refuse everyone else too, Ao. What else can we do?"

"Let's just go, the two of us."

"We need his skills."

"What skills? Do you think Ellie wants a wine-guzzling contest?"

Kagekao giggled. "That doesn't sound too bad right about now."

I rolled my eyes. "C'mon, Ms. P, we can leave him be."

She wagged her black-nailed finger at me and chided, "You should know better than to be so stubborn about your options. If you wish to prove yourself as a leader so much, you can't refuse everything like a child. You have to make compromises and negotiate—or apologize, even if you think you shouldn't."

"He called me a worthless piece of shit—."

"Then do something about it by being the authority," she hissed lowly.

I didn't want to argue with Ms. P of all people, especially since I know she's right. I have to steel up and shove my pride aside. But dammit, I really shouldn't be apologizing!

I turned to face Kagekao again. He remained perched on top of the desk, his mask boring an expectant expression. I took a deep breath and said, "I want to get one thing straight."

"Yes?"

"You really were out of line that day," I explained. "Not only did you insult me but everyone in this mansion. I can't stand for that. Jeff means a lot to all of us and for you to call us his 'incompetent friends' is an insult to everything we've been through with him. Not everything was perfect, but we still care about him! He's my friend and I want to help him. And although Ellie is the ruler of chaos, she's still my friend too. So don't you dare call any of us incompetent or worthless or anything like that, because you know nothing of our experiences."

Kagekao was quiet for a moment and he rolled his neck. Then he scoffed. "Can you get on with my apology?"

I kept my cool. Despite the frustration and annoyance built up inside me, I actually did. With a clear tone, I said, "I apologize for our scuffle a few days ago. It was unnecessary of me to have lashed out at you first, especially considering my position. Please...forgive me for my behavior." I bowed just to add a bit more to the gesture.

His mask curled a smile. "Thank you, little mantis."

I nodded and added lowly, "I'm also giving another apology in advance."

"Huh? For what?"

In a split second, I was on him and landed a sucker-punch across that stupid monochrome mask of his. Before he could retaliate, I took hold of his throat and squeezed, using Scarlet magic across his skin to increase the impact. Kagekao groaned and grunted as he tried to fight through the pain but I made sure he couldn't. He was too incapacitated to even lift his now-clawed hands to my face to attack. Squeezing tighter, I snarled, "We were both out of line that day. You should be apologizing to me too."

"Ao, what are you doing??" Ms. P squeaked.

"But I'll be okay without one for now," I continued. "And I know you'll insult me all you want after I let you go, but guess what? It won't matter. I will not apologize for anything anymore. You don't get to boss me around like you do. Learn to know your damned place. You're not the leader here; I am. And so long as we have our deal, until the day you have my father, you will listen to me. From now on, you talk shit, I won't hesitate to fuck your mask up again. Consider this your warning, demon."

Although I could feel the outrage radiating off of him, he still grinned smugly and muttered, "Kusomajime..."

"Can it," I muttered, then finally released him. He stumbled out of my grip and reluctantly retracted his long, dark claws.

"And don't ever climb onto Slender's desk like that again," I ordered. "I don't want you marking something that was so precious to him."

Kagekao stood up straight and harrumphed. "Of course..."

"We should get going now," I said. "Ms. P, are we ready?"

"U-Um, yes, dear. Come, both of you."

Ms. P beckoned us to come to her and we did. She held out her hands and said, "Take my hands and concentrate on the energy I give off. Both of you take hands as well."

Kagekao immediately scoffed with disgust. "I am not touching her hand."

"You must," Ms. P replied.

"For what purpose?"

"If all three of us are to have a successful jump to our location, we must all be connected. Hands are the best conduit of magic, and the palm is the biggest surface for magic to flow through. You must be palm to palm or else you may face consequences."

"I am a demon, there are no consequences for me," Kagekao huffed.

"That's what the last demon I knew said," Ms. P chimed nonchalantly.

Kagekao's mask frowned and he grumbled to himself as he took my hand firmly.

Doing as Ms. P instructed before, I closed my eyes and concentrated on the magic that I could feel extend from her palm to mine, and then to Kagekao, and then all around us in a circle. And suddenly I didn't feel the hardwood floor of Slender's study anymore. Instead I felt twigs underneath my shoes and the brush of tall grass against my legs.

When I opened my eyes, I caught the faint trace of black smoke fading around us. I took a deep breath of fresh air, noting how different it was to the air around the mansion's forest. I could already spot that hemlock that brought us all the way here. All of a sudden, the groaning and coughing of Kagekao stunted the serenity of the woods around us and I couldn't help but frown.

"Ugh...you humans and your...weird teleportation.... Makes me sick...! I should've just gone myself...." he complained against a tree.

"Too late for that, now let's get a move on," I ordered. As I started leading our little group through the brush, I heard Ms. P chirp behind me, "Don't worry, the sickness will wear off soon! If it doesn't, um....well, you wouldn't want to know, haha...!"

I can't tell if she's messing with him or she's actually serious. Either way, I'm liking it.

Ms. P was able to bring us approximately southeast of the forest resort. From what I could gather, it was an extremely large area with no real official boundary to designate its plot. And each cabin or home was incredibly spaced out. Seems a bit weird but the idea must have been to keep enough privacy for any residents. Unfortunately that means a lot of ground to cover for us.

"So," Kagekao started, seemingly recovered from his teleportation sickness, "how do we start? Shall we frolic amongst lilies and hope to find Elizabeth?"

"First is all, this region doesn't have lilies," I corrected him curtly, "second, I came prepared with something for you to do."

His mask smirked. "And that is?"

I reached around for my backpack and opened up the main pocket. I then tugged out an old white hoodie—Jeff's. He had left one behind in his room when I searched again and figured it could come in handy.

"Sniff this," I said.

Kagekao notably reeled a bit. "Eh? You brought me along to be your dog? How disgraceful."

"Again, we asked you along this mission for your extraordinary senses. So...sniff."

"Yoku ga dekirune... That old thing?"

"Would you have preferred used socks or underwear?"

Kagekao growled lowly before snatching the hoodie from my hands and giving it a whiff. After giving it back, he took a moment to stay silent and concentrate. His mask shifted to an expression of focus as he turned around and stated, "The scent is coming from this direction, just about."

"Let's get going then."

The three of us trekked through the forest ahead, going down winding hiking paths and old tree debris. Kagekao took the lead as he maintained Jeff's scent, while Ms. P and I walked side by side.

She tugged her coat tighter around herself and adjusted the scarf around her neck (used for obvious reasons). I looked to her and asked, "Do you want my windbreaker?"

Ms. P smiled. "No, I'm fine. It's not very chilly, it's just...well, these woods feel off. I suppose that may be a sign of Elizabeth's presence."

"Let's hope you're right," I remarked.

After a few moments of silence, Ms. P cleared her throat and whispered to me, "I still think you should've brought Jack along."

"I don't want to have this conversation," I whispered back.

She furrowed her brow. "He could do just the same thing as Kagekao."

"Don't compare me to that grayman," the monochrome demon suddenly commented.

"Hush, this doesn't concern you, we're having girl talk," Ms. P scolded.

"Maybe you should've saved this 'girl talk' for any time that was not this mission. Hpmh, women and their inconvenience—." The demon was given a swift swap to the back of the head from Ms. P summoning a baton of black smoke. He shut up right after that.

"As I was saying," she continued quietly. "I really believe you should've told Jack about this. What if something happens?"

"Nothing will happen, I'll ensure of it," I said.

"That's very ignorant."

"Maybe..."

Ms. P sighed. "I truly do understand your anger towards Jack, but you will have to come to terms and have a conversation with him. What was the last thing you said to him?"

"I told him to leave me alone," I said.

"And what if that was the last thing you'd ever say to him?" she asked, and it made me freeze.

She took a stop in front of me and looked into my eyes with a stern gaze. "What if we do find Elizabeth and Jeff and things really do go south? What if we cannot talk to her, make grounds with her? What if we never return to the mansion?"

"I—."

"You cannot ensure anything, Ao. The universe is cruel in that our fate is not ours to determine, nor to even know of. We can respect its cycle, but in the end we are a part of that cycle and must abide with its current. And if that cycle says that this mission is our last, you would have left behind only contempt between you and Jack. Your last words would have been for him to leave you."

I let Ms. P's words sink into my already heavy heart and couldn't help but cast my eyes down. Her expression eased up a bit as she crossed her arms and continued, "Perhaps I'm scolding you because I...I don't want you to have any regrets, unlike me."

When I looked into her red eyes, they were glistening with a distant sadness and disappointment. "Words carry weight, especially your last. Lack of words are just as cumbersome. I regret the last thing I ever said to Slender, and I regret what I never got to tell him. Regrets are inevitable, but ones regarding the very people you love are destructive. You and Jack...still have a chance. I know despite that he hurt you, you still love him, and he still loves you. And yes, that makes the betrayal even harder, but it's not the end. So please, no matter what...you must make every moment...every word count."

Her last sentence really hit close, very close. My fear of my coming immortality and having to appreciate every millisecond I can was becoming more and more suffocating as the days wear on, as I get closer and closer to Elizabeth. Slender warned me long ago and now Ms. P has too. I know I have to make things count. I guess a part of me just wants to stay as I am and not have to watch everyone I love slowly wither away. But, as Ms. P said, the universe...is cruel.

The sullen air around us was abruptly shaken from us when Kagekao cried out with a growl. I immediately got in front of Ms. P and sent magic to my hands, ready for whatever threat had startled the demon. Kagekao had his claws out and was hunched, prepared to lunge. I focused on the brush ahead of us which he was facing, seeing a few leaves rustle. Something was there, hiding or watching us.

"Stay behind us, Ms. P," I told her as I stepped closer to the bushes. Standing right next to Kagekao, I whispered to him, "Do you know what it is?"

He huffed, his mask visibly perturbed. "All I can smell is blood. A lot of it. From multiple sources, probably."

"I'll approach first. Whatever happens, you stay with Ms. P, understood?" He only responded with a curt nod.

Taking a deep breath, I creeped forward, magic still at the ready, brewing within my palms. The bushes ahead rustled again. What could be hiding? An animal? Or what if it's Corrupted? If Ellie really is here, her influence could cause there to be Corruption about. But I don't sense the tell-tale vile energy of them. What is this?

I had gotten about two feet from the brush when suddenly something dark-red darted out the other way and I reflexively put up a shield of blue energy. It didn't come after me so I didn't attack, but Kagekao had other intentions that went against my order. He had sprinted past me to chase down the animal. Through the blur of the situation I could finally recognize the suspicious animal...as a dog.

The dog cried out in fear as it ran from Kagekao, who was vehemently on its tail. With a growl of frustration, I ran forward and gained some momentum before I flitted in a burst of blue light. I teleported myself right on top of Kagekao's position and tackled him to the ground just before he could sink his claws into the poor canine. As soon as I knew Kagekao was down, I leaped off of him to grab the dog. It took a bit but I flitted in front of it just in time to catch it running into my arms. I recognized it's breed to be a Toller Retriever (oh, Craig used to have one when he was younger...). It didn't take long for the whimpering and flailing dog to calm down once I used my Purification magic on it.

It also didn't take long for my clothes to be smeared with the blood that was on this poor thing. Its long fur was nearly matted down from all the sticky fluid, semi-dry, semi-damp. It smelled horrible as well. After checking the dog's body, I could see that it wasn't harmed whatsoever. So where did all this blood come from....

Ms. P came jogging up and crouched down to examine the dog in my arms, which was now licking my jaw. Kagekao came up afterwards and I shot him a fierce scowl. He had the gall to mutter, "What is that look for?"

"I told you to stay with Ms. P, dammit! And why the hell did you chase the dog?"

"Force of habit."

"Some habit," I grumbled. "This thing is scared. Something happened around here to frighten it. Not to mention all this blood..."

"Ao, it has a collar," Ms. P stated. I looked to her hands as she turned the metal name plate to me. It read 'Howler' with a picture of a pink bow, although it was hard to tell with all the red smeared everywhere.

While Howler trembled in my arms, I glanced at Kagekao and asked, "Can you trace where this blood is coming from?"

"I suppose," he replied as he came to kneel next to me. He reached out to the canine but she obviously reacted negatively and tried to bite his hand.

"Kuso inu...!" the demon hissed, then managed to wipe some blood from her leg onto his fingers and examine it.

A moment later, Kagekao had the scent. "This way," he said briefly before he got up and took off. Ms. P followed him and I had to take a couple seconds to make sure Howler was secured in my arms before carrying her with me after them. I couldn't leave the poor babe behind. She was surprisingly tolerant for how skittish she was a few seconds ago.

After a few minutes of racing behind Ms. P and Kagekao, I could see the hint of a wooden structure through the trees. The closer we got, the more Howler was growing visibly upset, to the point where her trembling and flailing forced me to stop and set her down to rest. I was able to call for Ms. P to stay with her while I went ahead with Kagekao.

We finally arrived at a two-story house and already I sensed dread in the air. The front door was wide open and I could hear the buzzing of many flies all the way from here. Kagekao was silent as he went ahead and entered the house. Despite the pit in my stomach, I followed right after him.

And then I almost vomited.

It was an absolute bloodbath as soon as we entered the main room. The same buzzing of flies filled my ears and ran shivers down my spine. Everything was haphazardly tossed or overturned. A large scuffle. Blood spatter was on the walls, the furniture, the floor and even the ceiling. No crevice was left unstained, it seemed like. But the crimson splotches weren't what had me gagging. It was the disfigured bodies that were at the center of the room.

A man and a woman, from what I could tell.  It was...really hard to even gauge what I was looking at. Too many bone splinters...entrails protruding...limbs contorted.

A shotgun was across the room. These people knew they were in danger and tried to protect themselves from...whatever did this.

"Mantis!" Kagekao called to me from a set of stairs. I followed him, trying my best not to step in the viscera left behind. We trekked the stairs and the second floor looked even worse.

Kids lived here too. They probably didn't know what was going on downstairs until it came up to them. Three girls, not much older than me. Dismembered. Disemboweled. Desecrated. It seemed animals had managed to come and scavenge their remains as some of their limbs were eaten away. There was even a bird picking at an eyeball right before I scared it away out a broken window. I thought it couldn't get much worse until I stumbled into a bedroom with the body of a little boy strewn up. Entire back skinned. Spinal cord...no...no...oh my god, the rib cage is coming out the back—

I couldn't fight it anymore and threw up at the doorway. My eyes watered and burned. A family of six was staying here. All of them dead. And I have a feeling I know what...who could have done this.

My throat stung and I wiped the tears from my eyes, regretting it soon after as I got blood on my glasses and my cheeks. I quickly turned away and found Kagekao again, just observing the walls of this now horrifying family vacation home.

Before I even said anything, he said, "Elizabeth. This was her work. I can faintly smell her here. There can be no doubt."

A part of me wanted to doubt so, so badly. How could she do this? Why?

Jack was wrong about her becoming docile now that she has Jeff—oh my god, Jeff. If she did this, then what about him? I need him to be okay!

"We need to leave and continue searching for Jeff! We prioritize him and his safety now!" I proclaimed as I left for the stairs. Thankfully, Kagekao was right behind.

We ran back out to Ms. P, who was still comforting the family's dog, Howler (poor girl witnessed every single moment). With one look at us, Ms. P could tell something horrible had happened. "What did you find?"

"A family. They're all dead," I said. "Elizabeth...she..."

Ms. P had the same expression of horror as I'm sure I had upon knowing she was the culprit. But I had to steel my nerves for this investigation.

"We're finding Jeff—now."

I ordered Kagekao to take Jeff's hoodie out of my backpack to get his scent again while I worked to carry Howler in my arms. The demon was back on our original trail and we all set off again.

Knowing Jeff was in danger had us all marching forward faster, yet it felt like forever walking through all the trees and brush, as if we would never get there. It was almost unbearable.

And then Kagekao stopped in front of us and froze. So did Ms. P and I. We waited in uncomfortable silence for him to say or do something. I nearly snapped at him from the sheer anxiety to keep us going. But the monochrome demon did speak, and he said, "I smell blood."

"Well," Ms. P began, "the dog—."

"It is not the mutt," the monochrome demon retorted. "This is different. It is old blood. And it is among Jeff's scent."

No...!

"Quit standing, we have to go!" I blurted and ran forward. Ms. P called out to me to wait but my nerves wouldn't let me. Kagekao, on the other hand, sprinted along with me.

After running through the foliage and nearly tripping over protruding tree roots, the looming trees finally made way to a cabin. It was smaller than the house we saw before, much more quaint. Despite not knowing what it looked like before, I knew that this was the cabin Elizabeth had taken Jeff to. It had to be.

I stopped and set Howler beside a tree and waited for Ms. P to catch up so she could watch her. Yet upon my request to stay with the pet, she refused. "If this is the place, and if Jeff is hurt, I have to come with you."

"But the dog..."

"She will be alright. Watch." With a swift air, she summoned a rope of black smoke to connect to Howler's collar and around the tree. Then she caressed the canine's head delicately as she put her into a peaceful sleep.

"A nap would do her good after all she's been through," Ms. P said, and I had no choice but to bring her along.

She and I waited behind while Kagekao went ahead to agilely scope out the place. After a few minutes of tense silence, he came back and gave us the go ahead. So no one is home. That's good but also really not good, it would mean no Jeff.

I went up and entered the cabin first. The creaking of the front door was like thunder in my ears, but nothing came out to attack us at all. First thing was a small living room, with a bookshelf full of an array of novels, most of them fictional.

'She was a total bookworm.'

"Check all the rooms," I said and the three of us went on to investigate on our own. I took to the kitchen and went through all the cabinets and cupboards, even the fridge, which was not very well stocked. I found a prescription medication bottle labeled for fluoxitine, although it looked to have not been opened for a while. For Jeff? No, he didn't take this medicine at the mansion. I left the prescription alone and moved on.

A few spare dishes in the sink. A dish towel on the counter. Strangely enough, the knife block in the corner was missing a knife, the cleaver. I hope that isn't significant—.

"AO!"

Ms. P's panicked call immediately jolted me and I went after her voice. I found myself going down a short hallway into one of the two bedrooms where she stood waiting for me. The look on her face was beyond fear and I saw why.

A giant blob of dark-red blood lay in front of her. It wasn't as recent as the massacre in the other house, judging by how it was faded into the wood floor and crusted off along some edges. Still, it was here and it made me sick with nerves.

Kagekao finally came into the room and his attention went straight to the bloodstain. Swiftly, he kneeled down and scratched some of it onto one extended claw. After examining it for a moment, he went still, then reached underneath the bed next to it and pulled out the missing cleaver. It still had the dried blood on it's blade. Then, the monochrome demon confirmed what I feared, "This is Jeff's blood."

It felt like the wind was knocked out of me as I clutched onto my hair and leaned against the wall. Ms. P held my arm in case I needed aid, but I just wanted to curl up and scream.

"P-Perhaps, Jeff is still alive," Ms. P stuttered nervously. As much as I adore her optimism in most situations, I wasn't sure about this.

"It is too much blood for him to have survived," Kagekao stated, unbothered.

"Kagekao!" the red-eyed woman scolded.

"Would you have me be dishonest about this? I am a demon, but am no liar. You cannot spare mantis this reality. Your friend is gone."

"Kagekao, please...!" Ms. P reprimanded again, yet I could hear the waver in her voice as tears began to appear in her eyes.

In any other situation I would tell Kagekao to shut up. In any other situation, I would agree with Ms. P and stay confident with her. But as I kept staring at the stained crimson wood in front of us, I could barely gather my thoughts. My heart felt like it had sunk to the pit of my stomach; my fingers trembled, and my knees started to feel more like gelatin by the second. I couldn't bring myself to cry even though I really felt the need to bawl out with agony.

I was too late. I failed Jeff.

Just as I was about to drop to the floor, the sound of footsteps outside quickly had us all energized with fear.

"I thought the coast was clear...!" I hissed to Kagekao.

"I thought so too!"

"Hurry," Ms. P squeaked, "we have to go back home!"

"No time!" I deduced as I shoved the both of them into a bedroom closet and shut the door as quietly as I could with my shaking hands. We all stood squished together, lying in wait and hearing for the footsteps.

The front door opened and the footsteps sounded louder now. They were getting closer. They were coming to this room. Shit....!

Despite my anxiety, I managed my breathing so it wouldn't be so damn loud. Ms. P had taken ahold of my hand and squeezed so tight, I didn't think she had this kind of strength in her. But I didn't let go, and even squeezed back.

And then, there she was.

Through the paneled closet doors, I saw Elizabeth enter the bedroom. I can't believe it. There she was. Black hair, pale skin, and an eyepatch, which she took off. Mismatched eyes. It felt so surreal to see her in person after all this time of searching for her, and knowing who she had become in that span of time.

With a sigh, she sat on the bed, completely disregarding the stain on the floor. She took off her boots and jacket, then stretched her arms over her head. Her face looked exhausted. Then she spoke, and it gave me goosebumps hearing her voice again.

"Ugh, I need to wash this uniform. Then again, I put in my two weeks so I don't think I'll have to wear it again pretty soon...," she mumbled to herself.

Ellie proceeded to take off the blue polo uniform she was wearing, as well as the long-sleeved shirt underneath it. And there they were, Zalgo's mouths in all their smirking, sickening glory. No, they were hers now. I noticed Ms. P out of the corner of my eye covering her mouth, appalled. She hadn't seen the marks on Elizabeth until this moment.

The tired-looking girl tossed the shirts aside and sat there in her bra, staring down at her arms, observing the mouths just as I was. Her attention turned to something on her finger and she held it. It took me a few moments to realize it was her wedding ring, the one Jeff had carried around for years in her honor. Elizabeth clenched her hands into fists on her lap and then...she began to cry. It was so sudden it took me aback. Despite my terror at the situation, I found myself almost feeling...bad, watching her sob by herself. She just sat there, gripping at her pants, letting her tears spill and spill. Ellie...

After letting everything out, she sniffled and wiped her tears away. Gingerly, she slipped off the bed and kneeled down onto the bloodstain in the floor. Her expression was almost serene as she pressed her forehead against the floor and sat there.

"I'm sorry, Jeff," she murmured. Past her long, black hair, I caught her smiling gently. "Don't worry, I won't let you go out in vain. In the end, you feared me—hated me—but I will always love you. Always. Even now that you're...y-you're...dead..."

My throat closed up and I almost couldn't breathe. Kagekao was right...

With a big inhale, Ellie sat upright and bore a brighter smile. "It's gonna be okay, though. Everything will be okay. This world holds nothing for me, now that you're not here anymore. So...fuck it, right? Haha! I'll make sure nothing is left to take a single breath. Especially that fucking brat, Ao. The mere thought of the taste of her blood on my tongue...underneath my nails...in my teeth..." She sighed wistfully while I shook my head with disgust.

Still bearing that eerie, gentle smile, she caressed the floor once last time and said, "I'll purge this realm...for you...for what remains of us...."

Elizabeth picked herself up and began walking towards the closet where we hid. I completely froze and broke into a cold sweat. She's gonna find us. Can my teleportation take us all the way home? Do I have time? Chikushō!!!

But then Elizabeth turned and walked around her bed to pick up an old backpack from the corner. Inside she grabbed a hoodie and put it on. What chilled me is that I recognized it as one of Jeff's.

With another big sigh, she began making her way out of the room, calling out loud, "Caedis, let's go!" Damn, that guy was here too?!

The front door was slammed closed, and after waiting for what felt like years, it sounded like the cabin was clear. It seemed like we could all finally breathe and I opened the closet doors to let us out.

"Holy crap...," I muttered to myself, panting.

Kagekao leaned against the wall and commented, "So that was the new 'Lord of Chaos'? She is...quite the character."

"No shit," I grumbled.

When I looked at Ms. P, I could see the distraught sheen in her eyes and came closer to her. Before I could say anything, she murmured, "He's really gone..." I could tell she was tearing herself up inside the same as I was, and considering she had known Jeff and Ellie the longest here, I can't even imagine her pain.

Although I wished to grieve with her, I knew we had overstayed our welcome here. Before we left though, I did go to the bed and picked up the uniform Elizabeth was wearing. There was a patch on the chest for 'A-plus Auto Service and Repair'. Another lead. Not wanting to squander the opportunity, I shoved the uniform into my backpack to analyze later at the mansion.

"Let's go get the dog, and then we're out of here," I said as I led us to the bedroom door.

Suddenly, I bumped into something in the doorway, and looked up to see a pair of red eyes...and a head of white hair. Caedis...

I froze and stayed quiet as I stared back at the mute soldier in front of me. Ms. P and Kagekao also kept silent behind me, but I could sense we were all freaking out. Why is Caedis here? How did none of us hear him coming? Why isn't he attacking us? What is he going to do? And then Elizabeth probably isn't too far behind...!

Caedis just stood there, looking down at me and only me, not making a single move toward me. I instinctively wanted to grab at my shoulder where my scar is from him biting me in SCP, but I refrained from moving at all, afraid he'll react.

And then he moved and I had to hold back a scream. But he didn't attack me, or any of us, and instead sauntered over to a nightstand beside the bed. All he did was open the single drawer there, reach in and pull out a hardcover book. I only caught a glimpse of the cover, but recognized it as 'The Velveteen Rabbit' children's story.

He made his way over to the door, but not before taking a moment to stand beside me. Again, we stared into each other's eyes and I wasn't feeling as nervous anymore, for some odd reason. There was a sort of...knowing look in his eyes. It was strange. He observed me up and down before reaching up and wiping off the blood that was on my face with his thumb.

From far outside, I could hear Elizabeth's voice yell, "Caedis, what's taking so long? Did you find your book?"

That got Caedis to move again. As the white-haired man finally walked away, he licked his thumb as if it was candy. I don't know whether to be relieved or disturbed by the action. A few minutes later, he had left the cabin, and then a few minutes more passed until we finally fled the place. This time nothing stopped us.

Without any scratches or bruises, we all were able to go home, back to the safety of the mansion. And we took Howler with us. Poor thing needs a bath....and a new place to live.

...

That night, I laid on the couch in Slender's study, holding Howler close to me as I rubbed her head to put her to sleep. She was now fluffy, clean, and blood free, but she's still shaken up from what happened at that vacation home. She's been fed and given water, so that's covered. She also won't leave my side and that's okay. I just hope she can recover from her trauma. I also wonder if I can keep her here or if I need to give her away to a real home that can actually care for her. Besides, I think Smile miiiiight be jealous...

When we got back, Kagekao went about his own business and kept to himself in the mansion, off to enjoy another supply of his dumb wine that Ben got for him. Ms. P on the other hand...she wasn't doing very well. The news of Jeff's...passing hit the two of us pretty hard. It was difficult for her, but she had to spread the word of this news. Now the mansion was quieter than its ever been and I couldn't hate it more. We all didn't get to mourn for Slender because of SCP, but I'm sure it would've been like this too had we been able to.

We've lost a lot. Too much. Seedeater, Sam, Slender, and now Jeff. It was hard not to look back on all the times I tried to make sure he was happy, to help him heal, to get him to open up. Then, right when he can finally be himself again, right when we finally pulled through...he's taken from us. We failed him. I failed him. I failed everyone here once again.

"Why am I here?" I murmured quietly, careful not to wake Howler. I've gotten used to not talking aloud since I lost Sam, but sometimes I can't help myself. "Why is it me? Out of all the much more competent people to have taken the role, how could I have been the Proxy? Because of Emily? Because of destiny? Because of the universe and its ruthless ways? How could Slender look at me and think to entrust me...? I couldn't take care of a sewing needle..."

Everything sucks. And I suck at everything.

From the silence of the study came a knock on the door and I was yanked out of my obsessive thoughts. Carefully, I propped myself up on one elbow and said, "Come in."

The door opened and Jack stepped in, carrying a tray of food. He gently pushed the door closed with his foot and spoke up in his low, quiet voice, "Hey, uh, I brought you a meal. Ms. P made it for you. Said you hadn't eaten all day. I don't doubt her."

With a sigh, I laid back down and muttered, "Just leave it on the desk and I'll pick at it later."

Jack was reluctant for a moment, and then he shuffled over to the desk to leave the tray as I said. After that, he waited in that spot for moment and I could tell he was thinking of something to say. He always has a certain vibe to him when he does that.

"Ms. P told me about the details of your mission," he started.

"I...don't want to discuss it," I replied softly.

He nodded. "It's understandable. It's...a lot."

After standing still in thought, Jack made his way over to the couch and I braced myself for whatever he was about to say next. As he crouched down, he said, "You could've told me you were leaving."

"I was in a hurry," I replied. I subconsciously hugged Howler closer, like she was a teddy bear.

"Ao, a lot of things could've went wrong. I can list off all of them right now. That was dangerous."

"Everything we do is dangerous. What makes this so special?"

"Well, you didn't let me know."

"I didn't have to."

Jack frowned a bit but relaxed his expression after. "I repeat, you could've told me you were leaving, at the least. I could've helped you, too."

Furrowing my brow, I muttered, "I didn't want you coming with."

"Why not? I can also list off all the ways I would've been more beneficial."

"I'm sure you can, but I didn't want you to come with us," I grumbled. "Frankly, you....you would've just been in my way."

This time Jack kept his frown. "Is that so? Look, if you didn't want me on the mission, that's fine, but you should've told me."

And I frowned back at him. "I didn't, and that was my conscious decision. Just like you making the conscious decision to not inform me about Jeff being missing."

He huffed. "That's what this is about."

"Obviously!" I spoke up, waking Howler from her sleep. This time I sat up and faced Jack completely. "You didn't want to search for Jeff; I did. I had my priorities and you would've only hindered me."

"Hindered?"

"Yes, Jack. You viewed me as unfit, well I thought the same for you. I have my goals and I'm going to make sure I meet them no matter what...! I'm not going to let anything hold me back, not even you."

"I'm not your enemy here."

"You don't have to be an enemy to be in my way," I shot back. Clenching my fists on my lap, I added lowly, "This is my family. All that I have left. I'll do whatever I must, and protect who I must."

Jack's frown intensified but I didn't let it waver my attitude. Then, he stifled a wry laugh and said, "I am a part of that family too, you know? Or have you deemed me unfit for that as well?"

I didn't reply, mainly because I couldn't figure out a response. Although Jack figured out his own.

"Alright then. This conversation is over. I won't bother you anymore." He stood up and made his way to the door. As he grabbed the handle, he remarked, "Just make sure that in achieving your goals, you don't lose your head all the way up your own ass."

Even Howler seemed to tilt her head from the surprise.

"Excuse me?!" I blurted. Jack didn't reply and exited through the door, and I couldn't help myself to getting up after him. "Hey, wait just a minute!"

I managed to catch his hand, but he caught me off guard and shoved me against the doorway. Before I could say anything, Howler got up and started barking up a storm. With a groan, I said, "Oh great, you scared the dog."

Carefully, I slipped away from Jack to calm the Retriever down. "It's alright, girl, nothing is wrong. C'mon, let's get you to Ms. P. I'm sure she'd appreciate your company."

I led Howler out of the room and kept her calm as I did. Unfortunately, I didn't make it far in the corridor as I felt Jack grab me by the elbow and tug me back into the study. My effort to struggle out of his grip wasn't enough and he slammed the door closed, locking it even.

"Hey, what is your deal?" I scolded as I reached around for the handle. Yet again, he caught my wrist and jerked me against the door. In retaliation, I started to swipe at him to back off, but he restrained my hands and held my arms to my side.

"Jack, what is wrong with you?"

"What is wrong with you?" he bellowed, and I pressed my lips shut. Keeping his grip firm, he went off, "I'm not your family, is that what you were trying to say? I'm not special to you anymore? I made one mistake and suddenly I'm the bad guy? Yes, I was an asshole about Jeff's disappearance and I regret it! But that doesn't give you any right to push me aside out of your life!"

"I'm not pushing you out," I said.

"You've spent countless nights here in the study sleeping on that old couch instead of coming to bed with me. You never roam the mansion whenever I am and avoid even being in a room with me. You haven't even gone to see Ladon because I'm the one taking care of him now and you don't want to even see me from a mile away! And now you nearly put yourself and others in danger and jeopardize our goals all out of spite and pettiness against me! How is that not shutting me out?"

"You went against my back and hurt me, hurt this household!"

"And what the fuck are you doing right now?!"

Tears began to burn my eyes and I grit my teeth. "I—."

"Do you realize how selfish you're being lately? How idiotic and hazardous?"

"I'm doing all that I can!"

"You're doing nothing but being irrational."

Now I raised my voice too. "You keep telling me everything I'm doing wrong but how about actually helping me become better?!"

"I have been!"

"No, you have not! Calling me selfish, idiotic, dangerous, incompetent, unfit—that doesn't help me, dammit!"

"Okay then, I'll help you: stop being a bitch."

"Konoyarou!" That was it, I'd had it. With all my anger, I yanked myself out of his hold and pushed him away. He didn't stumble much, so I punched at his chest a couple of times. Jack looked mildly inconvenienced at best. What a jerk!

With a growl, I shoved him one more time, but Jack grabbed onto my wrists and yanked them down behind my back. Wiggling about, I yelled, "Let go of me! You asshole! You absolute jerk! Let go! Stop it! S-Stop it....!"

Obviously, he didn't let me go, but despite our argument, all he did was hold me tight against him. He just stood there in silence, with his face buried into my neck, restraining me with little effort. With what energy I had left, I struggled and kicked, growled and cursed, but in the end it never worked. And eventually all the adrenaline had me in tears, and after all this time, I finally broke down in Jack's arms.

"I'm just trying to survive all of this and keep everyone safe!" I cried. "All I can do is try and try and try, but it's not enough! And I'm sick of it, I'm sick of being a failure and disappointing everyone and losing people! I can't lose anyone else! I just want us to be happy! That's all I ever wanted!"

While I sobbed profusely, Jack just held me and listened to me lament. He listened to every hiccup and sniffle and whimper and I felt safe for the first time in a while. It was utterly humiliating but I felt safe. After a few moments, he let go of my wrists and I was free to clutch the back of his shirt and hug him tighter and tighter.

Finally, Jack moved and took my lips against his. It was rough and inaccurate, and our teeth kinda bumped into each other, but I didn't pull away for a second. Jack held my face so I wouldn't move (not that I wanted to) and kept his lips on mine for longer and longer. My face felt hot and I could barely breathe, and the same went for him. My lungs ached for air but I just wanted to keep pressing my lips on his. It was probably the worst kiss we've ever had in our time of being together, but it felt so wonderful.

All of a sudden, he carried me off my feet and to the couch, where he kinda tossed me onto the cushions. Before I could even sit up, he got on top of me and locked me into yet another ugly kiss. His teeth caught my bottom lip sometimes and scratched me but I didn't care. I just wanted to hold him close, close, closer until the end, until the sun dies out and the world fades away; until we grow absolutely sick of each other and come running back to one another all over again. We hurt each other so much lately, and yet here we are, making out like our lives depended on it. Despite all the emotions that had my heart aching, I wanted—needed him more than ever.

Jack eased up a bit and trailed butterfly kisses against my cheek, to my chin, down my neck. His hands were warm on my belly, slowly making their way up and up my shirt, to my chest, enveloping everything. The kisses kept going down, down, and down. He nipped at my sides, at my now bare hips, down, and down, and down, until—

"Jack!" I blurted and quickly covered my mouth. It just came out; I couldn't help myself. And I started biting my knuckles the more everything started to feel good. It was almost too much. I couldn't take it anymore. My toes curled and I kept squeezing Jack too hard by accident, to the point where he bit at my thigh to make me stop, but that just felt even better...!

And then he gave me more good feelings. So much more and I didn't know what to do but just hold him and call his name. Everything felt hot. My skin, his skin, my face, his face, everything, inside of me, hot, hot, so hot, too hot...!

Yet I loved every second of it. Every rough grip and gentle kiss. Jack's soft, auburn locks of hair between my fingers, the lovely feel of his bare chest against mine. His ears were so warm and flushed. Every single movement was perfect, every breath heavy with eagerness and uncontrollable love. In the excitement, his claws came out and scratched at my back, and it burned hot but I loved that too. It was so all so much it made me squirm and I even clawed at his back, marking that Ouroboros tattoo that I admired all the time. I loved everything; all those ugly, badly aimed kisses, the press of his palms against my chest, the raw emotion in calling out his name, the sweat and tears of overwhelming love.

Everything.

Everything.

Absolutely everything.

And, when all we could do was tiredly hold each other, and steady our heavy breathing, and press our foreheads together, I let the rest of my tears fall. All of the frustration and anger from before was long gone, and what was left was the sheer love I had for Jack that I had wrongly ignored. And it was stronger and more fierce than its ever been before.

"Koishiteru, unmei no hito."

...

The entire mansion was settled down. When I checked, Ms. P had taken in Howler for the night and slept with Sally in her bedroom. It was a sweet sight but I could tell the older woman had been crying right before falling into sleep.

It was just Jack and I in our room, lying in bed with only the moonlight providing a soft glow across the sheets. Jack lay right beside me with his arms wrapped around my waist and his head against my chest. I missed petting his hair like this, just the two of us. I missed the smell of the room and the blankets. I missed Jack.

"You're still awake, aren't you?" he suddenly murmured into my shirt.

"Yeah, sorry," I replied softly.

A pause of silence. "...What are you thinking about this time?"

I stared up at the dark ceiling to think of the words. "I never apologized to you for my behavior the past few days."

"I figured what we did earlier was more than enough for an apology—." He groaned when I flicked the side of his head and I managed a chuckle.

"Anyway," he started, "I forgive you. Don't worry about it anymore. I'm sorry, too."

Rubbing his head, I mumbled, "It's okay. I guess...shit happens? But apart from that...I think I need to work on some stuff emotionally...probably mentally as well..."

"I'll be here for you." Jack took my hand and gave it a tender kiss, and kept holding it, gingerly playing with my fingers.

"Thank you," I said and managed a big smile. It felt like I haven't done that in a long time: genuinely smile. It really was a relief.

Hugging Jack closer, I added, "I also take back what I said about the whole family thing. It was a horrible thing to have insinuated. You really do mean more to me than anyone else. I don't want you to ever feel like you don't belong. You deserve a loving place as much as anybody."

While caressing his ear and his cheek, I said, "I promised you I would never leave you, abandon you. Although I may be in a bad place, I'm gonna uphold that promise no matter what. I won't lose my way again. You are my home, remember?"

After a few minutes of not getting a response from him, I figured that he probably fell asleep. I couldn't blame him since it was rather late and we had quite the eventful evening.

All of a sudden, I felt his shoulders tremble and his grip on me tightened, and then I was cradling him closer, nearly suffocating him against me. Although he doesn't have the ability to cry, he was breaking down and it broke my heart to hear him breathing so heavy. He's always been so stalwart and strong, like an unmovable stone spire in a tumultuous sea. But over time, stone erodes from all of the crashing tides and sometimes it needs to break a little. He's always been there for my breakdowns and panic attacks, so of course I'm going to be there for him too. It was a bit scary to see him like this, but it isn't wrong at all. It's okay to not be okay, and I think I need to apply that to myself too.

So we held each other tight throughout the night, and it wasn't until dawn began to peak through the window that we finally slept soundly. For the first time in awhile, my dreams were tranquil and undisturbed by subconscious fears. For the first time in awhile...everything felt okay.