Izra choked and coughed through most of her first mug of prak but relaxed into the second. Whatever had haunted her eyes when she first entered the room disappeared under a glassy sheen. As I sipped from my third mug, I tried to keep my eyes off of the adorable pink flushing her cheeks.

I wondered if anything else would make her cheeks flush like that.

Plu crossed one leg over the other and propped her elbow on her thigh and chin on her fist. "I have a confession to make."

"Hmm." Izra leaned back and draped an arm over the top rail of her chair. "Is it about Navi?"

Plu's elbow slipped off of her leg as she straightened. "Navi? What do you mean?"

Ru snorted. "Told you it's obvious, Plu."

Plu swirled her third mug of prak with a sigh. "If it's so obvious, Navi must notice, right? So he is clearly just not interested."

I ran a finger along the rim of my mug. "Maybe he needs some confirmation. Maybe he's hoping you'll make the first move."

"Me? Make the first move? But I..." Plu tipped the mug to her lips and told the prak her next words. "I've never even kissed anyone before."

"This kissing part is easy," said Izra, "As long as no feelings go with it."

A pang of guilt jabbed my ribs, but when I shot Izra a wary sideways glance, an easy smile curved her pink lips. Her arm still rested on the back of her chair, hand dangling relaxed six inches from me.

"Izra, maybe you can help," said Ru. "You've got half of the women in Rakim pining after you. What was your first kiss like?"

Izra's smile faded. "I don't remember, Ru. That was a long time ago."

Plu groaned. "Come on, Izra! Everyone remembers that."

Izra slipped her arm off the back of the chair and folded her hands in her lap. "Not me."

Her voice remained even, but behind the glassy surface of her eyes, a cavern gaped wide. Possibilities wormed through my mind and filled my stomach with bile. I hated imagining someone so strong and free had once been trapped or coerced.

And I hated it even more knowing I had also tricked her.

Ru tsked loudly. "I'm sure you'd remember if you really —"

"Leave it," I said. When all three women shot startled glances my way, I added, "But I can tell you about mine, if you want."

Plu and Ru both leaned in closer, and a flicker of interest replaced the hollowness in Izra's eyes.

"Why, yes," said Plu. "Please do!"

I hesitated, not actually sure how to tell the story. I never told anyone stories, especially not private ones. But I had certainly heard plenty. Channeling Pim, I straightened and drew in a breath.

"Alright, so a Royal Advisor brought his family to dine at the palace six years ago. He hoped to arrange a marriage between Makandi and his daughter."

Plu clucked her tongue. "Princess Paranila!"

I shook my head. "No, this was before Paranila. This one didn't work out because, uh... because she didn't even look at Makandi. Throughout dinner, she just kept looking at me." Heat rose to my cheeks, and I continued quickly before I lost my nerve. "She requested I show her to the restroom, and then she pulled me in with her and asked for a kiss. And for some idiotic reason, I did it."

A breath passed around the room. After a moment, I forced myself to look at Plu, Ru, and then Izra. Plu and Ru were both grinning, but it was Izra's reluctant smile half-hidden by a hand that made my heart miss a beat and stirred fire in my core.

"Well, you can't stop there!" said Ru. "How was it?"

"Our lips barely connected before she decided she wanted more. Trouble was, she was wearing those skirts the Rakim nobility used to love a decade ago, with so many layers. So she spent the whole kiss wrestling with her skirt. And by the time she finally peeled back the bottom layer, Makandi walked in on us."

Plu gasped and clapped her hands, splashing prak over the side of her mug. "Sweet Acrador and holy Valavira! What did Prince Makandi do?"

"He... he just laughed. He thought it was hilarious." An old fondness needled me, a jigsaw piece that no longer fit in my chest. "We were still close back then. Almost like siblings."

Plu and Ru exchanged a glance, smiles faltering. I didn't dare look at Izra for fear of seeing judgment in her eyes. But then a moment later, Izra's leg stretched out a little further, and her toe brushed my foot.

My eyes flicked down to stare at the almost-accidental contact, and then I drew my gaze up to her face. Her own gaze fastidiously fastened to Ru and Plu across from us.

When Ru and Plu looked my way again, Ru asked, "So what about the second kiss? Was it any better?"

I swirled my empty mug. "Goddess, the second kiss... if you want to hear about that one, I think I'll need another drink."

Ru sprang out of her seat and tipped the bottle into my mug. After topping off everyone else, she plopped back down in her seat and nodded at me.

I gulped some prak and blew out a breath. "Alright. The second kiss was two years later, different woman but the same restroom. The Kalasiki chief was visiting, and her guards are mostly women. Unfortunately, the one who took me to the restroom, uh... she really liked biting. All teeth and no lips. And that might not have been that bad, except she tried to use her fingers the same way."

Ru hooted, and prak sprayed from Plu's mouth as she doubled over cackling. Beside me, Izra's shoulders shook, and she clasped a hand over her mouth to quell a fit of giggles. An uncontrollable grin spread across my own face, the unpleasant memory transforming to a gift.

Thank Goddess for the Kalasiki guard who gave me a story that could make Izra laugh.

When the laughter died down, Plu asked, "What about your third kiss?"

Despite my best efforts, my eyes slid to Izra, and memories enveloped me like warm water. The cold cave wall at my back, the glimmer of fascination in her dark eyes. So sweet... so genuine.

Izra's eyes met mine and widened slightly, one brow arching in a silent question.

I swallowed and focused on the twins. "The third kiss was nice."

Ru smiled and nodded. "Well, they say you have to knock three times before Goddess Rashika will open the door. Plu, you just need to start knocking!"

I furrowed my brow, inexplicable unease pinching my gut. "Where did you hear that expression, Ru?"

Ru shrugged as she swigged more prak. "Doesn't everyone know that one?"

But the only expression I knew did not match. The Goddess blesses those who obey without question. Now that I thought about it, I realized I had only ever heard the expression from my mother and in a handful of quiet scoldings from King Makapu when I failed to obey an order.

"I don't know, I never heard that one. I heard a different —"

Plu jerked to her feet and slapped a hand over her mouth. Through her fingers, she groaned, "Valavira, too much prak! I think I'm going to be sick."

A second later, Ru stood beside her and grabbed her arm. "Alright, off we go. Good night, Izra and Epsa!"

As Plu began retching, Ru whisked her out of the room. The door shut behind them, and I became hyper aware of Izra sitting just a foot from me... and of the tiny spot where her foot still touched mine. For several seconds, neither of us moved or spoke. Then Izra shifted her leg slightly, and her toe traced the side of my foot before stopping near my heel.

A bout of giddy nerves fluttered up inside my chest. Goddess, was that an invitation? Then I clamped down on the flutter with a self-reprimand. I had imbibed more prak than Izra had, but I was pretty sure she was feeling the effects more.

I cleared my throat. "How... how are you feeling? How drunk are you right now?"

She shrugged one shoulder and flashed an almost guilty smile. "Probably the drunkest I've ever been. But I'm not about to start retching, if that's what you are asking."

"Should... should we go check if Plu is alright?"

"Ru will take care of her." She scooted around to face me, putting her knee an inch from my thigh. "I'd rather hear more about that third kiss."

My breath caught in my throat, and my palms began to sweat. I edged to the back of my seat before shifting toward her, careful to maintain that sliver of space between us.

"What about the third kiss?"

She leaned forward a little, and her knee nudged mine. "You said it was nice?"

I eyed the contact between our knees, wondering how such a small touch could spread fire through me. "Yes."

"Only nice?"

I lifted my eyes to meet hers. The quirk of her lips, the dancing eyes... she looked downright playful. My chest squeezed, and my voice came out in a whisper.

"It was very nice."

"And if you could see that woman now... would you like to kiss her again?"

I released a shaky laugh and pinched my thigh hard. Don't, I told myself. Don't even think about it. Stay strong. Stay in control.

Izra reached out and flipped my hand over on my thigh. Her fingers swept over my palm, leaving tingles in their wake. Then her hand closed over mine and squeezed once... excruciatingly close to the now throbbing need between my legs.

"You don't have to stay strong around me," she said.

I studied her eyes, so luminous and beautiful. Uncertainty still flickered in the dark depths, but the intent in her gaze did not waver. It was as if she stood on the edge of a burning ship, contemplating shark-infested waters.

And preparing to jump.

Her eyes dropped to my lips. The distance between us grew smaller, though I could not say which of us actually leaned forward. Her outer thigh pressed against my inner thigh, and her exhale brushed my face.

But even as craving consumed me, the still-working part of my brain screamed a warning. Izra had already admitted this was the drunkest she had ever been. And though drunkenness might help her jump from a burning ship tonight, it wouldn't help her navigate the waters tomorrow.

I pulled back with a deep sigh. "Izra, my third kiss was a theft. I gained her trust and then betrayed it. And if I could see that woman now, I would never risk taking advantage of her again."

She shook her head, and a glossy black strand of hair slipped over one eye. "But what if she wanted to kiss you? You would tell her no?"

I lifted one hand to gently tuck the loose strand back behind her ear. "I would tell her not yet."

* * *

Though I barely left the cell, the next two days passed quickly. Zander continued his ministrations on my wounds and told me stories from when the founders of Rashika's Resistance all stayed on his farm: Denavin, Izra, Ru, Plu, and 'the others.' When I asked if 'the others' included Izkar, Zander cast a hesitant glance at the door and replied in a whisper.

"Not by the time I met the group. You see, this all happened after the incident."

Then he quickly busied himself in reorganizing the room.

Ru and Plu popped in several times a day to ask how I was doing and share updates on Plu's utter lack of progress with Navi. Alira brought Rona by for each meal, and Rona shared some of her favorite stories from Pim. Somehow the stories no longer bored or irritated me.

Goddess, I would sit through a thousand of those stories to see Pim one more time.

Izra was busy organizing meetings and collecting intel. When she did find time to visit, she stuck to business. She asked me questions about the palace, about the Royal Family, about the Royal Guard. I asked for details on how we would get Rona to the Trogolese mercenary.

Neither of us mentioned the drunken night or the almost kiss.

When the night of the hand-off arrived, Izra brought me to the cafeteria to rehearse details and go over back-up plans with Plu, Ru, and two brawny men I did not recognize. The plan was good, I thought, but worry ate at my chest.

Something would go wrong.

Alira brought in Rona, and I tied the blindfold over my eyes. Izra held one of my hands and Rona the other as we made our way up the stairs, through the mysterious room with the soft crackle underfoot, and outside to a wagon.

One of the new men drove the wagon while the rest of us packed the back. I tried not to think about Izra's hip and shoulder firmly pressed against my right side and focused instead on the small body on my left.

"You alright, Rona?"

"I know Pim said I would be a great warrior," she whispered, "But I'm scared."

I squeezed her cold little hand. "All of the very best warriors get scared."

"Even you?"

"Especially me."

Rona's head tipped to rest heavy against my shoulder. "I'm really going to miss you."

"I'll miss you, too."

The wagon lurched into motion. After a few minutes, I untied the blindfold. Surrounded by people in the middle of the wagon in the dark, I could see very little anyway. For perhaps thirty minutes, we rode in silence. Wheels rattled over gravel, and the air grew warm and stuffy from all of the bodies. Then waves crashed against the shore ahead of us, louder every minute. Then the briny breeze filtered through the fabric of the wagon, whisking away the stuffy warmth.

The wagon slowed to a stop, and quiet moans left lips as stiff bodies straightened and filed out. Only Rona and Alira remained in the wagon.

Ahead of us, the lighthouse jutted up from the rocky shoreline, illuminating a narrow sandy beach and flashing white over the crest of waves. The water parted around a boat secured to the shore, the rush at the stern breaking into a gentle lapping at the bow.

Then a Trogolese woman stepped out of the boat. Her hair and fur matched Rona's bronze curls. She peered around us eagerly.

"Where is my niece? Where is Rona?"

Izra turned back to me. "Epsa? You want to get her?"

The woman did look a lot like Rona, and everything was going exactly according to plan, yet unease continued to gnaw at me. Had I become so jaded that I simply could not accept something going right?

"What's your name?" I asked the woman.

"Rolina," she said, craning her head to eye the wagon over my shoulder. "I'm her mother's sister. I left everything to come here as soon as the mercenary gave the news."

I scanned the rocky shoreline behind us, though I was not quite sure what I was looking for, and then looked back at Rolina. "And where is the mercenary?"

A burly man stepped out of the boat and into the light, revealing a face covered in coarse tufts of graying brown hair. I couldn't say why, but something about him seemed familiar.

"Here I am," he said, flashing a smile.

A smile of jagged wooden teeth.